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Celebrity Big Brother 2007

 
  

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STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:09 / 06.01.07
That was literally what was happening when I got in from the pub... I have no idea what led up to it or anything.

Now he's being mental and the lovely Cleo is taking time out of her busy "having FAR better things to do than talk to Leo Sayer when he's being mental" schedule to chill him out.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:10 / 06.01.07
Stoatie, if I find a way to get you in with Starbuck 2007 can I get dibs on Cleo?
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:10 / 06.01.07
Or giant spiders. Or needy giant spiders boring holes in his needy boring head.

Dude, don't. You're getting me all excited. And I don't even like spiders.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:11 / 06.01.07
Stoatie, if I find a way to get you in with Starbuck 2007 can I get dibs on Cleo?

OOOOH, that's a tricky one.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:13 / 06.01.07
But just look at her little faaaaaace. She \m/. This is not just because I is drunk.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:14 / 06.01.07
Aww, Cleo was just SO pretending to give a shit when Leo was telling her about spelling out HELP in pretzels... then looked so relieved when she had an excuse to go find some cups.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:15 / 06.01.07
But now she's going to bed. We don't have to sit and watch Leo on his own now, do we?
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:18 / 06.01.07
Ah, farting. The universal language. See them all bond.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:19 / 06.01.07
Ah, Hellbunny. To think you used to mock me for watching this shit...
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:20 / 06.01.07
Only because you used to snigger at us all for watching this shit before you watched this shit! I remember, Stoatmaster Z. I remember...
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:21 / 06.01.07
That'll teach ME to buy a dodgy batch of retcon from some bloke down the pub, then...
 
 
Ganesh
23:24 / 06.01.07
And so my cycle perpetuates itself. Bwahahahahahahh etc.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:24 / 06.01.07
All retcon is inherently dodgy. It's part of its limitless charm. I like speed for the same reason. It's just so... synthetic. You can't possibly be a hippy and a speedfreak. Christ, I'm rambling.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:26 / 06.01.07
I want to buy Jackieau an Emu. She'd make a great Rod Hull.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:27 / 06.01.07
IT'S ALL GANESH'S FAU... hang on... feel dizzy... Hey! who's that guy there with the trunk?

Much as I wanted Leo to shut the fuck up, I'd rather he'd done it out of politeness than petulance.

Now Ken fucking Russell is shouting at Jade's mum!

This is BRILLIANT!!!
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:27 / 06.01.07
LEAVE KEN ALONE.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:28 / 06.01.07
One more reason why I wish Rod Hull had never died. He's have been great on this with Emu.

Or just Emu on his own, though I hear he was quite shy and wouldn't appear in public without Rod.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:28 / 06.01.07
Not you, stoats
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:28 / 06.01.07
Ken's gonna be fine. He's dealt with Oli Reed. He can handle Jade's mum.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:29 / 06.01.07
With one arm tied behind his back.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:31 / 06.01.07
NOW.

NOW.

They're all sleeping except Leo.

NOW is the time to lock the bedroom doors and UNLEASH THE BEAR!!!

Or bees.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:34 / 06.01.07
Bearbees. Swarms of flying furry clawed death stinging his curly-headed face.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:34 / 06.01.07
REALLY SLOWLY.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:35 / 06.01.07
How is it that he's the only one up and he's STILL trying to get attention?
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:36 / 06.01.07
I DON'T KNOW.

I have a wallful of movies I have yet to watch, an XBox 360, World of Warcraft, but I HAVE TO SEE WHY THIS MAN IS SO... GGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:37 / 06.01.07
SOMEONE'S UP! QUICK! LOVE MEEEEEEEE!
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:38 / 06.01.07
If he's having problems sleeping, I'm sure he could just get Dirk to SMACK HIM OVER THE HEAD REALLY HARD with something.

It'd be fine. He did it all the time on the A-Team. He's a professional.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:39 / 06.01.07
At least Howling Mad Murdock wasn't a CUNT.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:41 / 06.01.07
Indeed!

Incidentally, not sure if it's been in this thread, but my favourite Dirk moment so far was in response to Donny's "DIRK FUCKING BENEDICT!!!"...

"Well, I don't usually use the middle name..."

Class.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:42 / 06.01.07
He's awesome. I wish he was my dad.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:43 / 06.01.07
I'd kind of like Dirk and Cleo to be my parents (though that could be weird) with Ken as my uncle.



LEO.


STOP IT.

NOW.

IT'S LATE, YOU'RE TIRED, AND YOU'RE FUCKING SHOWING OFF, MOTHERFUCKER!!! GO TO YOUR FUCKING ROOM!!!
 
 
The Falcon
23:44 / 06.01.07
I'm actually finding myself a bit irate with the whole set-up now Donnie's headed. And who could blame him? It'd turn a stomach made of iron or any other hard stuff to see Jade Goody's stupid-voice diary room act (she does not speak like this in any other circumstance, notably) again and the thought must have just been too much to take. It's all a bit panderobouros really, and I don't think I'm going to have it. I'd really like Jade to be the first to leave, or her huffy mum, but it seems unlikely - I'm thinking Shilpa due to her dual disadvantage with the voting public of being both female - ladies always leave first, remember - and also foreign and dark-skinned. Also, while likely on a world scale top 3 in terms of fame, not actually very famous in UK.

Not that I specially love her, only really like Ken, Faceman and Cleo (was a bit of a tearjerker her talking about Kenny there, could actually see Malone opening article mentally, the parasite) but it's all a damp squib compared to '06 so far. Sorry to spoil the mood. They need 'can't pay, won't pay' Tommy for that extradimensional Galloway gravitas, should kowtow to his demands and have him confront H about his apolitical, except where refugees are concerned (was his bandmate Lisa Scott-Lee not also pro-death penalty, or do I misremember?) stance.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:44 / 06.01.07
(Actually, that'd be REALLY weird, what with Cleo only being about nine years older than me...)
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:48 / 06.01.07
Well, as long as you're going to have an Oedipal complex, make sure it's a good one.
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
23:48 / 06.01.07
Dirk's up. Yesyesyes.
 
  

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