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Text Adventure Game Emulator #1

 
  

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Whisky Priestess
11:47 / 30.08.05
Pick up phone and accept call. Do not speak until spoken to.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
13:10 / 30.08.05
You fish the phone out of your satchel. The display says 'MY HOUSE'. You answer it, but don't say anything.

"You there, ankle-breaker?"

The voice sounds familiar. It's Robert.

"Before you hang up, you might wanna ask yourself whether or not you want to find out who you really are."
 
 
illmatic
14:22 / 30.08.05
Say to Robert "Sorry about your ankles but you were bang out of order. What did you expect? What do have to tell me about my identity?"
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
14:47 / 30.08.05
"I guess excrutiatingly painful injuries are an occupational hazard in my line of work. Just to show you that there are no hard feelings - and that's not just the morphine talking - I'll tell you everything I know about the Abraham Facility and your amnesia. Meet me at the coffee and cake shop on the corner of Acacia Avenue and Munt Lane at 10am tomorrow morning, if you want to know the shocking truth."
 
 
Triplets
15:03 / 30.08.05
I say "Be seeing you" and hang up, then make a mental note to stake out the coffee and cake shop earlier tomorrow around 7am.

I call out into the yawning darkness of the jungle, "Caroline! Less pies, more haste!"

(But honestly, Robert's totally dead isn't he?)
 
 
Alex's Grandma
15:06 / 30.08.05
Say 'Okay then m'man, I'll see you in there.' Then ask him what he thinks a good thing to do with the rest of the evening would be.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
15:53 / 30.08.05
The evidence strongly suggests that Robert is alive, as he was alive if unconscious when you last saw him, and appears to be speaking to you on the phone now.

"Okay then m'man", you say, "Be seeing you in there. Now, what do you think a good thing to do with the rest of the evening would be?"

"I'd go to that party in the jungle. Then after the party, go to the lobby of the Dancing Bear Inn. Round about four, you gotta leave the lobby. Then take it to your room and -"

The phone goes dead.

"Hello? Hello?"

Nope, it's dead. Out of battery.

You call out into the yawning darkness of the jungle, "Caroline! Less pies, more haste!"

There is no response except the chirping of strange tropical insects.

Time passes.
 
 
Triplets
17:32 / 30.08.05
Sod this.

I rest the bike against a tree and cover it securely with loose foliage.

Then, ready my guns and plow into the jungle South in search of Caroline.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
17:54 / 30.08.05
You rest the bike against a tree and cover it securely with loose foliage.

Then you head South.

A pick-up truck comes trundling down the road at some speed.

You are standing in its path, invisible.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
18:08 / 30.08.05
Get the hell out of its path.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
18:29 / 30.08.05
You dive out of the way of the oncoming pick-up truck, which trundles past. You catch a glimpse of Caroline in the passenger seat, from your new position lying in some ivy.

The truck stops just a few feet North. Caroline gets out.

"That's funny, I'm sure I left it around here", you hear her say.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
18:37 / 30.08.05
Unflip collar, stand up dashingly and say 'Sorry about that, the bike's over here. I was worried about the monkeys, what the hell's up with those? Anyway, my new friend Robert has recommended this party - he tried to kill me a while ago, but everything seems to be ok now. So, shall we go?'
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
00:39 / 31.08.05
x shirt.

x trousers.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
01:15 / 31.08.05
Realize only a sucker wastes bullets on wandering monsters. Mentally review unarmed zombie combat techniques. Keep eye out for shillelagh.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
10:46 / 31.08.05
You unflip your collar, becoming visible.

Ludacris hops down out of the driver's seat of the truck, sees you and says:

"Stand up!"

You stand up, dashingly (or as close to that as you can manage). Caroline looks at you, crosses her arms and frowns a little.

"Sorry about that", you say, "the bike's over here."

Caroline brightens, and looks as if she might forgive you yet. Ludacris recognises you.

"Hey!", he says.

"I was worried about the monkeys", you explain "what the hell's up with those? Anyway, my new friend Robert has recommended this party - he tried to kill me a while ago, but everything seems to be ok now. So, shall we go?"

Ludacris says: "The moon is full, and I'm looking for a THICK young lady to pull. So, yes."

You examine your shirt. It is frilly and white.

You examine your trousers. They are black and leather.

Ludacris points to the satchel he gave you.

"What in the world is in that BAG, what you got in that BAG?", he asks.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
10:53 / 31.08.05
Say, "Luda, have you ridden the magic horse?"
 
 
Whisky Priestess
11:08 / 31.08.05
... and then x bag contents and tell Ludacris what you got in that BAG!
 
 
illmatic
13:07 / 31.08.05
Also say to Ludacris "You push a big truck, get your keys out".
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
17:02 / 31.08.05
"Horseback? I'll get my reigns!"

"No, a magic horse. Have you ever ridden a magic horse?"

Ludacris rubs his chin thoughtfully.

"Yeah, once... when me and Poon was smoking weed and breaking all of they rules. We were in the jungle on the South side of Death Mountain. The horse seemed to be made of crystal or mirrors or something."

In exchange for this information, you show Ludacris what's in your satchel. (You are wearing Robert's watch and have your guns, money and own room key in various pockets, just so you know.)

- a small bag half-filled with icing sugar
- a set of keys including the key to room 7 at the Dancing Bear Inn, a car key, a small key for a padlock or safe-deposit box, and a swipecard for the Abraham Facility
- a Library card
- a small slip of paper with a crude map drawn on it
- a Babelfish
- a mobile phone


Ludacris is impressed by the Babelfish, but seems particularly interested by the small bag half-filled with icing sugar. You let him have it, as you see no use for it. He sticks out his tongue, tilts his head back, and pours the bag's contents into his mouth.

He seems very pleased with this. He smacks his lips, grins widely and says:

"She put that sugar on my tongue, tongue, yippie yippie yum yum, goodie goodie gum drops."

Meanwhile, Caroline is wheeling the bike onto the back of the pick-up truck using its built-in ramp.

In exchange for the sugar, Ludacris offers to give the two of you a life to the party in his truck.

"You push a big truck, pull your keys out", you say. He accepts the compliment and does indeed get his keys out, in preparation for putting them in the ignition.

"Do you want to sit up front or in the back?", he asks.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
20:56 / 31.08.05
The back please.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
22:25 / 31.08.05
You unselfishly clamber up to ride in the back of the pick-up with the motorcycle. Ludacris and Caroline retake their seats, and Luda throws the truck into reverse and executes a three-point turn, throwing you about in the back and almost hitting a tree. Before long, he's got the truck pointed in the right direction and you're headed South.

After a while, you reach a crossroads. The truck makes a hard left - again bouncing you around between hard bits of metal - and takes the path that heads North-East. This path was not indended for vehicles of this nature, but your driver handles the terrain with aplomb. Sadly neither the truck's suspension nor your own can be said to do the same.

As the path curves East, you eventually settle for lying on your back jammed between the bike and a pile of rope, with your satchel as a headrest. From here you can see the path speeding away behind you, and the canopy of the trees towering up on either side.

You also have an excellent view when something enormous, shaped like a dinosaur and made of metal stomps across the path just behind the truck, crossing from one side of the jungle to the other, knocking down several small trees in the process. Ludacris drives on regardless, leading you to conclude that either a) this is a regular occurence around here, b) he didn't see it in his rear-view, or c) you are hallucinating.

After ten minutes or so, the truck comes to a stop. Luda and Caroline disembark and, after checking for any broken bones, so do you.

You are standing in a clearing in the jungle. It's not very clear, though, as there is a Party going on. Flaming torches on poles illuminate the area. To the North and to the South are rows of hastily-assembled wooden shacks, three on each side. The ones on the North side seem to be bars, serving liquid of various kinds. The ones of the South are huts, serving as-yet unknown purposes.

To the East, immediately in front of you are about thirty to forty people standing around sipping drinks and talking or, further East, dancing. Further East still is a makeshift DJ booth and, beyond that, you can see a path leading down to the Beach. To the West, the path you just arrived on leads back into the jungle.

"Take notes of the brand new dance", says Ludacris, indicating the crowd.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
22:27 / 31.08.05
You can hear loud, bass-heavy music playing.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
22:39 / 31.08.05
N. x bar.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
22:46 / 31.08.05
Dance, motherfucker, dance!
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
08:51 / 01.09.05
You dance North towards the three bars.

The first bar serves fruit juice, mineral water and a light ale.

The second bar serves a selection of beers, wines and spirits.

The third bar serves absinthe, Aftershock and rocket fuel.

They have been labelled 'Novice', 'Intermediate' and 'Expert' respectively.
 
 
illmatic
09:23 / 01.09.05
Asl Luda and Caroline if they'd like a drink. Buy the drinks they ask for. Drink what Luda is drinking.
 
 
Quantum
14:41 / 01.09.05
(make mental note to work out how to harm this smug midget bastard...



..and then really fuck his shit up gangsta stylee)
 
 
Alex's Grandma
19:14 / 01.09.05
Reflecting on how eerily reminiscent all this is of the scene in Ibiza, ask Ludacris if he thinks it would be ok to ask around about scoring some grass here.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
21:29 / 01.09.05
You buy Caroline a bottle of water from the Novice bar (1 dollah) and buy two rocket fuels, one for Luda and one for yourself, from the Expert bar (4 dollah each).

You find yourself musing about the mysterious Mr Shawn as you sip the extremely potent cocktail of alcohol and caffeine. What is his agenda? If he and Mr Gregory are playing a game, then what does it mean that Mr Shawn helped you escape the Dancing Bear Inn and told you it would be safe there later? Can he be trusted?

You ask Ludacris if he knows where you can score some weed.

"A drug dealer's dream, I'm so fresh and I'm so clean", he says, and disappears off into the crowd to locate such a businessman.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
22:11 / 01.09.05
S

Get Caroline

E

Dance
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
23:15 / 01.09.05
Technically Caroline is not to the South and you can't "get" a person, only objects. But teh Computer understands.

You walk over to Caroline and ask her if she wants to dance. She agrees and the two of you head East towards the DJ. Soon you're surrounding by a heaving throng of dancing people. Over the music, which is some form of booty bass, Caroline shouts in your ear:

"Shake your body like the dance, stupid smiles, top of groove. Imagine you’re dancing. You’re a robot!"

These instructions are cryptic, but you do your best to comply.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
23:33 / 01.09.05
Move your arms jerkily. Hope you look like a robot.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
00:13 / 02.09.05
The DJ plays 'Do It Like A Robot' by Princess Superstar. You move your arms jerkily. You and Caroline and the two best dancers here! Congratulations!

Ludacris comes elbowing through the crowd, and yells in your ear: "I found a dopeman who can sell you some dope, man! He's down on the beach."
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
03:06 / 02.09.05
Dance with Luda.
 
 
8===>Q: alyn
03:06 / 02.09.05
Do it kinda dirty.
 
  

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