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Text Adventure Game Emulator #1

 
  

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Regrettable Juvenilia
10:31 / 23.08.05
You currently have two guns. Which one would you like to ready?
 
 
Evil Scientist
10:52 / 23.08.05
Rob's gun. Mine's hopefully not been used in any crime yet.

Quickly eject clip and check approximate number of bullets then slap it back in.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
11:32 / 23.08.05
You pop the clip out of Robert's gun. It's empty. You check the chamber: also empty. What an amateur! No wonder you were able to fuck him up without getting shot. What kind of hired killer carries a gun with only one bullet in it?

Fortunately, it's a .45. You reload it with your remaining pistol clip.

You go South, out of the front door of the Dancing Bear Inn, and turn right, heading North-West up a street. It is dusk.

"Dum, dum, dum-dum. Dum, dum, dunn-dunn. Dum dum dum, dum, dum-dum... Deedle-durr! Deedle-durr! Deedle-durr! Dunn-dunn!"

You are on a street that you see signposted as Munt Lane. The street curves so that it is heading due North, and carries on in that direction.

To the West is a bar. There are people sitting outside the bar at tables and chairs placed out on the street, and you can see more people sitting on a roof terrace, surrounded by potted palm trees and other flora. You can hear the sound of people talking and laughing, glasses clinking, and light music playing. The name of the bar is spelt out in large letters in a block green and red font above the door: Bwah-Ha-Hah Bar.

To the East is a clothes shop. It appears to be shut.

South-East, the street leads back to the village square.

There is a man here, lighting lamps.
 
 
Our Lady Has Left the Building
12:45 / 23.08.05
Ask the lamplighter for advice.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:56 / 23.08.05
What would you like to ask him for advice about?
 
 
Triplets
13:04 / 23.08.05
Go to the clothes shop. Go round the back. Try and break in through the delivery door (or back door).
 
 
Evil Scientist
13:11 / 23.08.05
But check for alarms, to the best of my sketchy (but quite superspy) abilities.
 
 
Triplets
13:14 / 23.08.05
(When we get a chance we should totally check the mobile phone for clues about BOSS HJOB etc)
 
 
illmatic
13:18 / 23.08.05
Ask lamplighter if he knows BOSS HJOB

Look at people in bar. See if anyone there may give you clues.
 
 
Lord Morgue
13:53 / 23.08.05
Steal tuxedo. Wear tuxedo. Enter bar. Order vodka martini shaken not shtirred.
 
 
Disco is My Class War
14:32 / 23.08.05
Walk up to one of the people in the bar and say, "Do you have the time? And do you know where to find the Twart Bar?"
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
14:40 / 23.08.05
You see no way to get round the back of the clothes shop.

You ask the lamplighter:

"Do you know BOSS HJOB? Can you give me advice about him or her?"

He shakes his head, and scurries away from you as if you were a crazy person. It occurs to you that 'BOSS HJOB' is probably nobody's actual name.
 
 
bitchiekittie
14:43 / 23.08.05
check time. consider priorities, specifically importance of date.
 
 
bitchiekittie
14:44 / 23.08.05
(date with girl, not the calendar date)
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:20 / 23.08.05
i
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
15:33 / 23.08.05
You enter the Bwah-Ha-Hah Bar. Inside, electric lightbulbs inside tinted paper shades give the place a pinkish tinge. There is a bar to the North-West, and seats to the South-West. Directly North are some stairs to the roof terrace. Directly South are the toilets.

You walk over to the bar, and order a vodka martini. The woman behind the bar mixes the drink, and serves it to you in a cocktail glass. You pay her the 2 dollah she requests, and sip your drink.

You consider your priorities.

You have to assume that whoever is Out To Get You is likely to target Maya too. Since going back to the Dancing Bear at this stage seems unwise, meeting her at 11pm at Club Twart might be your first chance to warn her.

Or just have a dance.

But Pete was supposed to meet "the beardy" at the pier at 10pm. Will there still be anyone there? Is it worth checking it out?

What about the dominoes? And the magic horse? Who are Mr S and Mr G? What do they have to do with the androgynous beauty and the bearded thug? Are they the androgynous beauty and the bearded thug?

"Do you have the time?", you ask the woman behind the bar.

She looks at you quizzically and says:

"Sie haben nicht eine Uhr?"
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
16:05 / 23.08.05
You are carrying:

- a satchel
- one .45 calibre pistol, loaded with 6 bullets
- another .45 calibre pistol, loaded with 7 bullets
- a digital camera
- the key to room 23 at the Dancing Bear Inn
- a watch
- a small bag of white powder
- a set of keys, as yet unexamined
- a Library card
- a cut-throat razor
- a money clip containing 138 dollah
- a small slip of paper with a crude map drawn on it, which teh computer forgot to mention in the last few inventories
 
 
Tryphena Absent
17:25 / 23.08.05
Go to loo and snort powder using a dollah.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
17:59 / 23.08.05
And chop it with Library Card. Then examine Library Card, if haven't already done so.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
19:17 / 23.08.05
You finish your drink and walk South, pushing open the bathroom door.

You are in a room some call the Bathroom, others the Toilets of the Bwah-Ha-Hah Bar. There is no bath in it. Go figure.

There is, however, a sink, beneath a wall-mounted mirror, and two cubicles. One of them is vacant. You go in, shut the graffiti-covered door, and put the lid of the toilet down, trying to ignore the persistent smell of vodka-flavoured vomit. You pour out a little of the white power, chop it into a couple of lines using the Library card, roll up a 10 dollah note, and snort both lines in quick succession.

The white powder is icing sugar.

You sit down on the lid of the toilet, and wait for the sugar rush to abate. While you're doing so, you examine the Library card. There's not much to see, just a photo of Robert:



And his name: R. Clarkson.

Also printed on the card are the details of the library:

Bastard Library
10 Acacia Avenue
Village of Bastard
Tel: 555 2046
Opening hours: 9am-5pm, Mon-Fri
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
19:27 / 23.08.05
x keys.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
19:45 / 23.08.05
You examine Robert's keys. On a keyring are three keys, a fob, and a swipecard of some kind. The fob is attached to one of the keys, and bears the number 7. It looks very much like the fob that's attached to your room key from the Dancing Bear. Of the other two keys, one is small and looks like it might be for a padlock or safe deposit box. The other looks like a car key.

The swipecard is a thin grey slab of plastic with a metalic strip running down the middle. On one side is printed: ABRAHAM FACILITY.

A voice from the cubicle next to you asks:

"Highgraves? That you?"
 
 
Whisky Priestess
20:19 / 23.08.05
Point gun in direction of voice.

Say "Who wants to know?" in a Humphrey Bogart stylee.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
21:08 / 23.08.05
There's no answer. Instead, a brown padded envelope is pushed under the partition dividing the two cubicles. HIGHGRAVES is scrawled on it in black marker.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
21:40 / 23.08.05
Pocket envelope and run out of the cubicle.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
21:50 / 23.08.05
You grab the envelope, stuff it into your satchel, slam the cubicle door open, and leap out, spinning round to see... the next cubicle is empty.

The door to the bathroom swings back and forth on its hinges.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
21:51 / 23.08.05
Get envelope out of satchel and open it.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
21:53 / 23.08.05
Also check time.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
22:24 / 23.08.05
You take out the envelope and rip it open. It contains a note and a dictaphone.

The note says:

Highgraves,

I have your lady friend. If you want to see her alive again, you'll start doing what you're told. Be at the Pier alone and unarmed at 10pm, BST.

Your new employer,

Mr G.

PS. Press 'play'


You press the 'play' button on the dictaphone and it starts playing a cassette.

"Hello", says a voice you recognise. "This is M.I.A. Could you pleeeeeease come get me?"

They've got Maya, then.

You check the time on Robert's watch. It has settings for both Monster Island Time and British Standard Time. You set it to BST.

8.52pm
 
 
Whisky Priestess
22:40 / 23.08.05
Oh well. Sigh quietly to self.

You should never trust a girl, not even your mother, 'cause they'll only leave you.

Forget about MIA, then head back into the bar, order another drink, and, shoving a dollah into the jukebox, put a sad, sad song - perhaps "Bridge Over Troubled Water"? by Simon & Garfunkel - on. Await developments.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
23:03 / 23.08.05
I don't understand the command 'forget'.

You go back to the bar and order another vodka martini. You cannot see a jukebox in the bar.

As she puts down your drink, the woman behind the bar leans over and says:

"OK - bevor ich alles beginne, muß ich sagen, daß ich bin Innenabdeckung und mein Name nicht nirgends erscheint, OK? Er ist zwischen Ihnen und mir."
 
 
Smoothly
00:03 / 24.08.05
Lean closer. "fahren Sie fort zu sprechen"
 
 
Evil Scientist
07:21 / 24.08.05
Ask (in English) for a bottle of their cheapest, nastiest spirit.

Look for complementary matchbox on bar.

(mouthfull of raw spirits plus naked flame = handy distraction tool and fun burns)
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
08:09 / 24.08.05
"Fahren Sie fort zu sprechen", you say, leaning closer. "And get me a bottle of your cheapest, nastiest spirit."

The bartender nods knowingly, and turns to reach up to a shelf high behind her. She takes down a bottle bearing a blank white label, puts it on the bar together with two shot glasses, and pours you a shot each.

"Ich gab oben für eine Weile trinken, aber ich bin nicht gegen Spiritus."

She knocks her drink back in one, and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand.

You can see no complimentary matches on the bar.
 
 
Ganesh
08:46 / 24.08.05
Hum See What The Boys In The Backroom Will Have, suggestively.
 
  

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