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Marvel Mythology Surgery

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05:14 / 11.06.06

Well, the home video/distribution rights to the TV show are probably not exclusively owned by DC or Warner Brothers. They are probably owned by a third party that has smartly bought advertisement space on both DC's and Marvel's website.

The rights of music for television/film and the rights of television/film on home video are very separate from the intellectual copyrighting. Also, very very complex, which is why some shows will never never see the DVD market because the rights are so convoluted.

Especially the film rights to The Hobbit.

12:12 / 14.06.06

Is this how all old dorks end up?
Secret Wars Reenactment Society

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

14:25 / 14.06.06

God I hope so, I would rock out as Kang.

What ever happened to Kang anyway?

14:46 / 14.06.06

he popped up in Young Avengers...turns out Iron Lad is the young Kang. Kang was ready to be grooming his young self for a fun day of conquering and Iron Lad/Young Kang didn't want to be eeevil and conquering. Mayhem ensued, then Iron Lad/Young Kang realized he couldn't fight fate and after a huge battle, agreed to go with his future self, for fear of massively messing up the timeline.

14:55 / 14.06.06

Luckily, the last thing he did before he left with his older, abusive self was recreate...the Vision, who is know sleeker and a deeper shade of green.

15:09 / 14.06.06

and, the 'new' Vision has the emotional maturity of a teenager, sort of, making him fit right in with the Young Avengers.

08:42 / 15.06.06

Kang was master of Limbo and Illyanna Rasputin was mistress of Limbo but his Limbo had floaty staircases and antique furniture whilest hers had Buddhists and unbaptized babies. How does this work? Why is his Limbo so much more pleasant than the hers?

And speaking of Limbo and dead girls, who was Dead Girl (from X-Statix) before she was dead? Dr. Strange recently asked her and she didn't want to talk about it.

08:55 / 15.06.06

Not sure about the Limbo situation but wasn't Dead Girl an actress before her untimely death? I think it was mentioned in an issue of x-force/x-statix but I'm not sure if it was later to revealed to be a falsity/cover.

Regrettable Juvenilia

10:32 / 15.06.06

No - that was a character who appeared later.

11:34 / 15.06.06

I got the distinct impression she was hiding who she was originally and trying to avoid the question. She has no memories of her past but she believes she may have been an actress murdered by an ex-lover...wonder how she's connected to Dr. Strange? Read something funny about her right now, it seems her mutant power first manifested itself when she died. What a time for it to kick-in.

11:47 / 15.06.06

Kang was master of Limbo and Illyanna Rasputin was mistress of Limbo but his Limbo had floaty staircases and antique furniture whilest hers had Buddhists and unbaptized babies. How does this work? Why is his Limbo so much more pleasant than the hers?

Kang/Immortus is the master of "True Limbo", where time does not pass and time travel is possible. Magik and Belasco rule a different plane (also called Limbo) where time is inconsistent.

Back during my Usenet days, we called Magik's Limbo "Limbo Heights", and treated it as a suburb of the real Limbo.

11:48 / 15.06.06

So there's different levels of Limbo? Do you get points on how low you go?

12:20 / 15.06.06

Nah... a few stories aside, there's never been a solid connection made between the two planes. I think it's just that human beings tend to use the name "Limbo" for timeless realms. Probably all that old-school Catholic upbringing.

16:14 / 15.06.06

Further to the discussion in the Civil War thread: What, exactly, was the complete story with Peter and Mary Jane's baby, and her disappearance, and the plane crash that "killed" MJ, and the trial separation? This is an era of the Spider-Man books I have always been particularly hazy about -- indeed, I can't even recall if the plane crash and the baby's abduction/disappearance were linked, though I feel like they were.

12:53 / 16.06.06

and how come MJ wasn't made into a pheonix clone / avatar given her lovely hair colour and plane crash surviving skills and the kid sent into the future to come back and be, like the fiery spider or something?

13:42 / 16.06.06

Chris:

I don't know the details of the plane crash scenario, as that was late John Byrne reboot material (and sweet God, I never thought the writer would come who was so bad he could actually make me stop reading fucking Spider-Man). But the deal with the baby: at pretty much the same time Norman Osborn returns from the grave with a nasty scar and Ben Reilly disintigrates into mush, MJ gives birth to little baby May, who is hale and healthy and immediately spirited away by an Osborn crony. Peter and MJ believe that their daughter was born dead, but she's actually chilling on a yacht in the Agaean with the World's Ugliest Fake Nurse (she has Rogue-stripe hair? Thanks, Steve Skroce) waiting for an awesome writer like Tom DeFalco to shepherd her back into continuity. She currently appears in the is-it-cancelled?-yes!-I-mean-no!-wait-yeah-it-is-ummm-no-wait title Spider-Girl.

Incidentally, in case you have the urge to throw up in your mouth a little bit more, two months later it was revealed that the Aunt May who was granted the most dignified, poignent death scene in Spider-Man history in the lovely Amazing 400 was actually an ACTRESS who Norman Osborn PAID TO HAVE PLASTIC SURGERY TO LOOK LIKE MAY PARKER and then TRAINED TO ACT JUST LIKE MAY PARKER and who then SLIPPED INTO A COMA FOR LIKE A YEAR only to wake up and DIE OF NATURAL CAUSES. All part of Normy's master plan. And man, those 3-D renderings of Peter's new swingin' bachelor pad sure were some of Byrne's best work in years! That man just can't help but produce pure gold.

Thanks for bringing up these memories. I hate you. And myself. But mostly John Byrne.

14:50 / 16.06.06

And what's especially sad is that Byrne used to be one of my favorites, in his FF/AF/X-Men days. Even his short HULK run is quite good.

But anyway...yes, the death scene of May (J.M. DeMatteis-written, if I recall correctly) was quite good, and the whole 'it was an actress paid by Osborn' thing was bizarre and just truly, truly AWFUL. I remember those days well. (The cover of #400 had something tawdry like a raised/gatefold gravestone-design cover, I think.)

Yikes.

Every once in a while, some Marvelites ask Marvel 'whatever happened to May and Peter's baby' [in the regular MU, not the Spider-Girl future MU] and Marvel just ignores them. Thankfully.

Spyder Todd 2008

20:25 / 16.06.06

Amazing Spider-Man #400 has been on my top 10 single issues of all time since it first came out in 1996, believe it or not. And I was only 10, then. Then it got buried under the Clone Saga stuff, and now it's mostly forgotten. It's tragic, really.

11:52 / 17.06.06

Jesus Fuck, how much money do you pay a person to have surgery to look like Aunt fucking May?! And this was pre-Strazynski, so she was still looking like a 98 year old skrull/cryptkeeper hybrid.

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

04:32 / 19.06.06

Jesus Fuck, how much money do you pay a person to have surgery to look like Aunt fucking May?! And this was pre-Strazynski, so she was still looking like a 98 year old skrull/cryptkeeper hybrid.

After reading the internet "Life of Ben Reilly", that talked about all of the behind the scenes stuff on the clone saga, it's pretty clear that the new EIC back then just wanted to make it all go away, and he'd leave it up to other people to fix it.

And no one since has touched any of the stuff. I know someone who asked JMS at a convention if he would ever be dealing with Peter and MJ's baby, and he had no idea that they had one, and he would ask about it at the next editorial meeting...and we haven't heard hide nor hair about it since, so I'd imagine he was told just to forget it and hope the fans did as well.

14:54 / 19.06.06

jeeesus, aunt may as actress, PP & MJs baby, you couldn't make it up. except someone did and got paid money.

anyhow, on the subject of babies, i read bendis' (and it's amazing how many people on the board really don't like this guys work) pretty good pulse trade at the weekend (which despite some occassionally hackneyed writing was enjoyable) and wondered if luke cage and jessica drew ever got their baby in the end (or whether they were lost in the mists of continuity too)

Regrettable Juvenilia

14:59 / 19.06.06

The baby was last seen in the New Avengers annual, alive and well and in the care of its parents, who also married that same issue.

18:56 / 19.06.06

So superheroes WHO DON'T EVEN HAVE COSTUMES can misceginate and have an out-of-wedlock baby in front of God and 8-year-olds the world over...but the Rawhide Kid has to do his mincing in the MAX ghetto?

You'd think if Marvel was gonna be serious about catering to regressive values they'd, y'know, go all the way with it.

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

05:27 / 20.06.06

So superheroes WHO DON'T EVEN HAVE COSTUMES can misceginate and have an out-of-wedlock baby in front of God and 8-year-olds the world over...but the Rawhide Kid has to do his mincing in the MAX ghetto?

They conceived the baby in the MAX ghetto, and once they came over to the Marvel Universe, they got married. Draw your own conclusions from that.

03:54 / 24.06.06

So this seemed like just the tread in which to paste this: Here's Joe Quesada's official description of [just how they fucked up Xorn] just exactly what Xorn is, current as of that craptacular recent issue of NEW AVENGERS.

Kuan-Yen Xorn and Shen Xorn were twin brothers from China, both mutants, one with the power of a star in his head, one the power of a black hole. Kuan-Yen Xorn came under the influence of as-yet-to-be-revealed entity that forced him to assume the identity of Magneto, battle the X-Men and destroy Manhattan. He was subsequently killed by Wolverine near the end of that battle, in the Planet X storyline.

Soon thereafter, his twin brother Shen surfaced and briefly joined the X-Men. This Xorn brother was de-powered during M-Day.

Because Xorn's powers were psychokinetic, and his personality was so strong, it basically remained an almost disembodied sentient thing among the big ball of mutant energy. When that energy got sucked down to Earth by Michael and all absorbed by him, Xorn was the dominant personality in the mix, and that's what drove him towards Genosha and Magneto.

Weak, dude. Weak. I especially like that the "as-yet-to-be-revealed entity" dodges the existence of Sublime entirely, so they can make it be, oh I don't know, The High Evolutionary or some shit whenever they feel like it.

08:26 / 24.06.06

Words fail to describe how completely shit that is.

Jake, Colossus of Clout

17:15 / 24.06.06

So Xorn and Magneto were never the same person according to Quesada? That's idiotic.

Our Lady Has Left the Building

17:53 / 24.06.06

Well, to be fair to them they were told they had to find some way to bring Xorn back despite the fact that he patently never existed, so any solution was bound to be the suck. Has a name ever been uttered as to who exactly ordered the return of Xorn?

I wonder if after they had to bring him back there were further arguments over him which is why he was depowered after 'House of M'? As a sort of acknowledgement of how ridiculous this idea was? I suspect we'll never see him again, unless Geoff Johns starts writing for the X-Books? That'll probably be the only way we'll find out who this 'mysterious entity' was as well.

Shiny: Well Over Thirty

18:45 / 24.06.06

I'm actually starting to fall ever so slightly in love with all the ridiculous shit that's been done with Xorn since George left X-Men. It's almost as if Marvel are consciously trying to pile one absurdity onto another in the strange tale of the further adventures of the character who never actually existed in the first place, and as such the saga is starting to turn into cracking comedy. I should note that I've never actually read any of these books, just heard about the stories online, and I freely acknowledge that it might be an good deal harder to see the humour if you've actually suffered reading the issues involved.

21:20 / 24.06.06

Well, y'know, Xorn's class had a hard time letting go of their deathmasky zen fool, too, and I totally wanted him to be really real, compared to Magneto, once or thrice... so maybe some folks at Marvel are just having a hard time letting go.

Or, it's marketing, and somebody though Magneto needed to be good and heroic and Cockrum-approved. And Xorn could have a Sid and Marty Krofft weekly program.

rabideyemovement

15:19 / 25.06.06

There was no need to make that Magneto an imposter, when Avengers Disassembled followed so closely behind. Wanda could have resurrected him with a thought. But they had to go and make the Xorn disguise real... Did they really despise Grant's writing that much. I know some fanboys kicked up a storm because Mags acted out of character, but that was where the kick came in. Now we're to believe that Shapechanging in Xorn's array of powers?

If I remember correctly, he didn't actually have healing powers but was manipulating metal nanobots that allowed Xavier to walk, right?

16:24 / 25.06.06

Exactly. And, what Grant was hinting at in Planet X anyway was that Xorn was an idea made too well. They should have rolled with that in House of Mess.

Essential Dazzler

16:50 / 25.06.06

The worst part of this whole New Avengers mess is that I didn't have a clue it was coming, no warning, no time to mentally prepare myself, just turn the page and BAM! THAT name.

Now a question, how long ago was Xorn last mentioned? I thought Marvel had given in and just started ignoring the whole mess.

rabideyemovement

18:06 / 25.06.06

Probably in Austen's horrible X-Men run, and that was Xorn I's twin brother Xorn II.. Xorn I had a star for a head. Xorn II had a black hole for a head... Speaking of which, what are the implications of casting a smaller star and a black hole (with a bunch of other disembodied powers) into our sun? um... maybe not such a bright idea. I guess this means Xorn's legacy will live to be butchered again.

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

01:47 / 26.06.06

Claremont also did a thing on Xorn, basically dismissing all of Morrison's stories by claiming he was just some nutcase who thought he was Magneto.

I wonder why there was an obsessive need by Claremont to piss on everything Morrison did, when he used stuff by other writers when he came back to the X-Men the first time.

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