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Urgh! Fuck!: A thread for untamed hate and anger [PICS]

 
  

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Hattie's Kitchen
09:04 / 02.11.05
FFS.

OK, she didn't want to see me any more. Fine. I can accept that, as evidenced by the fact that I have not contacted her since and she has not contacted me.

So why the fuck is she obsessively reading my blog? I never even told her I had a blog, who told her I had a blog and directed her to it? I think I know who. Great.
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
09:16 / 02.11.05
Charlotte Fucking Church = I am very annoyed. Who gave her the green light to exist? I wan't answers!
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
09:17 / 02.11.05
Ah, my fucking grammar & spolleng.
 
 
Evil Scientist
13:22 / 02.11.05
It's still burning inside me that I left my wallet on the train at the weekend. Stupidity that was no-one elses fault but my own. Left it on a train whose next stop was London Waterloo, did I really think I'd ever see it again? Did I bollocks. Some drone's picked it up, had the tenner out of it and, no doubt, tried to use the cards.

BUT I CANCELLED THEM YOU TOSSER! CANCELLED THEM GOOD AND PROPER!

It's a pity they didn't try to buy something with it. I had images of tracking them down and making them pay. The Chairleg of Justice is a mighty foe.
 
 
*
00:59 / 04.11.05
I am angry.

I am angry because I aced that interview, and you know it. I know it too, because you told everyone in your office that I aced that interview and how impressed you were with me. Because I am overqualified for the position, but not so much that I would leave the organization the minute something better came along. Because I deserve that job. Because you liked me and were impressed with my skills. And yet, for undisclosed reasons, you passed on my application.

I am angry. But not as angry as I am sad.

I am sad for you, who will now have two people in the position who are not as qualified, not as effective, and not as committed to your organization. I am sad for those people, who will flounder around trying to do things I could do blindfolded. I am sad for your HR staff, who will have to look for new candidates in six months or less, when I will have a much better job and will respond regretfully that I am no longer free to accept the position. And I am sad for me, as I will have to waste more of my time looking for another job which would meet my needs as well or better. Sad sad sad. What a shame you passed on my application.

You fuckers.
 
 
P. Horus Rhacoid
23:41 / 05.11.05
Oh, cats. Key on my keyboard. Reduced to functioning but highly annoying rubber nub. Argh.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
00:42 / 06.11.05
Awesome. Take the English language and debase it, why dontcha?
 
 
*
00:55 / 06.11.05
Sorry, Xoc. I meant to add "like a hot dog," but I forgot.
 
 
*
05:02 / 06.11.05
(That was, in fact, a joke. The quantities of sinus medication I've been downing assure me that it was very very funny, but that you had to be there.)
 
 
Bastard Tweed
00:40 / 07.11.05
I just slept for sixteen hours. An entire day wasted. You'd think if I were that tired I could get to sleep when I wanted to but I was tossing and turning for an hour and a half.


I am very pissed off.
 
 
Triplets
01:46 / 07.11.05
I've gotten home after drinking to find I've had my nails covered in varnish. See, for 'lithers this would call for calls of 'ooh, saucy'. But, for where I come from, is calls for 'ya fuckin poof'. Bastard fucking mates.
 
 
Triplets
01:48 / 07.11.05
Czern. You might have amnemia (low iron levels which can cause shit sleep). I'd have your local doctor run blood tests and the like.
 
 
All Acting Regiment
08:45 / 07.11.05
Triplets- get a pout, put a cushion up your jumper and give 'em a wiggle for their whistles, they'll never know the distance.
 
 
Bastard Tweed
17:25 / 07.11.05
Actually, that might make sense considering that I usually have an abnormally low red blood cell count anyway. I'll check up on that just as soon of my vow of silence runs out.
 
 
Phex: Dorset Doom
03:28 / 09.11.05
Urgh! Fuck! I hate it when people I nominally admire turn out to be complete asshats. Specifically, Vincent Gallo, whose merchandising website, apart from being basically a HTML encoded rimjob to himself, carried this either racist or extremely stupid advertisement for sperm donation (which has since been removed):
"If the purchaser of the sperm chooses the option of natural insemination, there is an additional charge of $500,000... Mr. Gallo maintains the right to refuse sale of his sperm to those of extremely dark complexions.... Mr. Gallo does not want to be part of that type of integration. In fact, for the next 30 days, he is offering a $50,000 discount to any potential female purchaser who can prove she has naturally blonde hair and blue eyes. Anyone who can prove a direct family link to any of the German soldiers of the mid-century will also receive this discount(emphasis mine)... a Jewish mother would qualify a baby to be deemed a member of the Jewish religion. This would be added incentive for Mr. Gallo to sell his sperm to a Jew mother, his reasoning being with the slim chance that his child moved into the profession of motion picture acting or became a musical performer, this connection to the Jewish faith would guarantee his offspring a better chance at good reviews"

So there is a) another confirmed moron in the world and b) a bunch of overrated-but-watchable films I can't ever see again. Thanks humanity! Thanks right in your collective asses!
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
06:09 / 09.11.05
BASTARDBASTARDBASTARD INSOMNIA.

I have had precisely 0 hours sleep since going to bed at 1am.

I have now given up and am trying the shortsharpshocktreatment.

FUCK.
 
 
Spaniel
06:53 / 09.11.05
Phex, hasn't Gallo been known for that kind of cockery for years and years?
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
08:04 / 09.11.05
Fuck me,

Just checked the Gallo site. What a fuckin' prat, I thought his music made him seem dull but Jesus Christ, that's atrogious. What a giant bell.
 
 
Sekhmet
13:14 / 09.11.05
Stupid fucking state full of stupid fucking asshats.

If somebody would come down here and shoot all the fuckwads who voted for Prop 2 yesterday, whereby we now have a ban on gay marriage encoded into our fucking Constitution, well, I'd be much obliged. I'd do it myself except I'm scared of guns.

Huzzah for institutionalized bigotry.
 
 
Bastard Tweed
16:26 / 09.11.05
Sometimes you just wish so very much that you could turn green and quadruple in size if you could just ... get ... angry ... enough.



Fuck it, I'm voting for Kinky.
 
 
Bastard Tweed
16:32 / 09.11.05
Goddammit, already. When will we finally rise up and shout, "HULK SMASH PUNY LEGISLATORS!"


Goddammit goddammit goddammit.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
07:12 / 10.11.05
Having worked untiil about 2:30am, I am thinking of getting a taxi home and enjoying an hour or two of sweet, uninterrupted sleep before heading back in, when I remember that I couldn't find my security pass earlier. After an hour of fruitless searching, I resign myself to staying the night at work, as nobody else will be around to let me in. At around 4:30 I discover how to turn the lights off. I fall asleep in my Aeron for about 15 minutes at a time, freezing in my coat, waking frozen into unnatural postures. At 6:15, as I flick through yesterday's paper and try not to die, I find my security pass clipped to a filing cabinet. Where I left it.

My name is Weird Hot Uncle Haus, and I am in essence a cretin.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
11:27 / 11.11.05
Fucking magic email lists/boards/comms. All magicians are cunts.
 
 
Shrug
23:23 / 13.11.05
Arggh bloody leaving things to the last possible minute! Stupid fucking procrastinatory bastard*.

*i.e. me.
 
 
Madman in the ruins.
05:33 / 14.11.05
Got up at 4 am, to get into work for 5.30. Arrive at work as per the rota, Night guard says "What you doing here?"
"I'm roatad on."
"no your not."
I get the rota out and show him. "I'm rotad on."
"Hasn't anyone told you then, that rotas obselete."
Thinks "obviously not, Its my idea of fun to get up at 4am clear the frost off my car and drive 16 miles."

I'm now back at home, a fiver down on the day (costs me a fiver in petrol for a 32 mile round trip), eating crumpets, debating wether to go back to bed or not and wondering where I will be working in the next 24 hours.
 
 
Triplets
06:28 / 14.11.05
On the bright side: you're eating crumpets.
 
 
All Acting Regiment
09:13 / 14.11.05
Fucking magic email lists/boards/comms. All magicians are cunts.

I want to hear that elaborated, it sounds juicy!
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
09:16 / 14.11.05
WHERE ARE THE FUCKING BUILDERS?????
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
09:34 / 14.11.05
No juice, just random irritation.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
10:34 / 14.11.05
WHERE ARE THE FUCKING BUILDERS??????????
 
 
modern maenad
11:43 / 14.11.05
(a) pub
(b) pub
(c) pub
(d) B&Q
(e) pub
 
 
pointless & uncalled for
11:47 / 14.11.05
There is a complex algorythm which governs the arrival time of a builder. Whilst the algorythm cannot be expressed in words or numbers it does require graphonumerical representations of their name, shoe size, nationality, depth of cleavage and telephone number.

The product of this algorythm must then be factored against another number derived from the spinal displacement caused to the builder by the thickness of their wallet, an albatross named Philip Nasi Goreng III and a precise nanometric measurement of your current state of resignation.

Once the factor is equal to null then the answer will be "tomorrow at the earliest mate" although builder benevolence can be expressed as +/- "I'll drop by this evening to see what needs to be done."
 
 
paranoidwriter waves hello
12:05 / 14.11.05
WHERE ARE THE FUCKING BUILDERS??????????

Put the kettle on, get a fresh pot of tea brewing, and they'll be there in no time. Apparently, in the ocean a builder can sense a single drop of tea from up to 30 kilometres away. Amazing creatures.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
12:10 / 14.11.05
They always turn down my offers of tea. They seem quite partial to my cigarettes, though. I've just opened a new pack.

Incidentally- WHERE? ARE? THE FUCKING? BUILDERS??????????????? I'm on a cunting nightshift this week, and it's just not feasible for me to stay awake all day every day.
 
 
paranoidwriter waves hello
12:21 / 14.11.05
Hmm... "Doesn't like tea, partial to others cigarettes..."

(*p.w thumbs trhough builder-identification handbook*)

Aha! Sounds like you’re dealing with the "Lesser Patched Puffer Builder"; a rare and elusive breed indeed. Says here you should go to the roof, fire up a hookah, and send out smoke signals.

Seriously though, I hate it when they don't show and ignore your calls. Best of luck ol'bean.
 
  

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