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barbequotes

 
  

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Triplets
00:39 / 01.05.06
Be grateful, you´re not the other princess. You know, the one with the defective Hyde Park fountain.

Why has no-one else quoted Mistofelees? Fucking gold.
 
 
Feverfew
10:48 / 01.05.06
Triplets, re duck: Ce canard là est violeur is the best I can do, you buff little butt bunny.

Although this will be the second time I've bq'ed Xoc, surely this is almost a given?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
15:10 / 01.05.06
I still get people who act like my sexuality is some sort of superpower, and wait for me to do something else wild, like produce a lit birthday cake from my ass, or perform a card trick or something. Then I have to explain that I'm a bisexual, not a magician. And then I have to explain that I _am_ a magician, just not that type of magician.

Logos, in the Homo 101 thread, on the (perceived) wonders of bisexuality.
 
 
Chiropteran
18:27 / 01.05.06
Don't be bad to the good cop. It's really unwise.

Flyboy gives some good advice, with a low, purring hint of menace.
 
 
Ganesh
21:56 / 02.05.06
They don't come back like cats.

THEY COME BACK LIKE O-FUCKING-DYSSEUS!!!


Stoatie on badgers (possibly on a plane).
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
21:29 / 03.05.06
Franky represents the holistic worldview? Really? Are you quite sure he doesn't represent shooting monsters in the face?

Flyboy's bullshit detector makes a welcome appearance in the Seven Soldiers thread.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
11:12 / 05.05.06
Probably, this is because I am of the opinion that boundaries rock!

Whistler, explaining hir fondness for the Policy. Rock on, boundaries. Rock on.
 
 
Chiropteran
12:28 / 05.05.06
More face-shooting quotes, this time from Jack Denfeld:

I don't wanna stereotype my own people, but I'm pretty sure if you told Americans they had to vote they'd shoot you in the face.

Well, some.
 
 
Shrug
21:49 / 05.05.06
In the summer
By the pool, in that house in Hampshire
It must have been twilight when all this happened
The defining event.

Drinks with your father
By the bench
On the lawn
Stocks, shares, and so on,
I would need to be worthy
And I'd need to be good.

But
I'd have sold my soul
Or walked a thousand miles
I'd have altered my style
To have walked up the aisle
With you
Then.

And as the dragonflies played out over the garden
Blue in the evening, in the rose-coloured sun
And you came out streaming, with your hair in a bun
And my heart said 'Surely,
This is the one...'

Your father got his cock out.

**************

Alex in Creation's poetry thread.
A bit overlong for a barbequote perhaps but well worth more than a cursory glance.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
11:37 / 06.05.06
From the Charles Clarke thread in Switchboard;

Me; I wouldn't be at all surprised if the UK's international standing's in the toilet by Christmas

But I'm a Lady! With Flowers; Where is it at the moment then?

Stoat wearing purple; Queuing uncomfortably on the landing, waiting for America to finish its really big poo.

It's the 'uncomfortably' that does it, I think.

(Still laughing to myself about this, what is it now, about ten minutes later)
 
 
petunia
03:50 / 07.05.06
Triple Fuss Emily Sez: Grab his heart-shaped wrongcock.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
18:17 / 08.05.06
Not to make this a Barbequote Poetry thread, and not to give unfair advantage to the A-Team (my mortal enemies) over in the Von Mises' Apprentice thread, but I couldn't help loving the following lullaby for Von Mises, from Joy Divison Oven-Gloves:

The Wheels of Capitalism go round and round
round and round
round and round
The Wheels of Capitalism go round and round
All day long


Incy Wincey Mises climbed up the water spout
down came the rain-of-socialist-public-services-and-social-legislation
and washed poor Mises out!
Up came the sunshine-of-neo-liberal-hegemony
and dried up all the brief-but-unpleasant-state-interventionist gains
So Incy Wincey Mises climbed up the spout again


This little piggy went to market
This little piggy stayed at home-like a-dutiful-wife-should
This little piggy had roast beef
This little piggy had none-as-they-were-too-idle-to-find-a-proper-job
And this little piggy went ME ME ME ME ME ME ME, all the way home


(Shhh, I think he's asleep.)
 
 
Tryphena Absent
18:55 / 08.05.06
"Oooh, look who's come to pay us a visit, it's Mister Blair! Sooo sorry to have restricted your freedom of speech by exercising my own. I'll just go back to Guantanamo now, where your good friend Mister Bush has paid for my permanent island vacation."

Id entity made me wish we employed insane sarcasm more often.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
22:12 / 08.05.06
I AGREE with WP's decision to QUOTE the above SCREED OF INVECTIVE.

Which would APPEAR to REFER to the A-TEAM's ongoing efforts to OTHER the dear Von Doktor Herr Misses as an ADULT BABY, who is no longer ABLE TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR HIMSELF.

Think on, Dr Von - If you're in favour of THEM, then YOU MAY AS WELL ACCEPT THAT THEY'LL BE LAUNCHING A COUP ON YOUR BUSINESS' GENERALLY, QUITE SOON.
 
 
*
03:33 / 10.05.06
Alex's Grandma
(prev. Alex's Grandma, the return.)
00:21 / 10.05.06


Well it's not about looks, is it? It's about personality. Sitting here on-line in the twlight home for the utterly demented, Brighton and Hove branch, that my grandson was happy enough to pay for before he went into rehab, I'm looking at all these slabs of male meat that are disporting themselves on the beach with a jaundiced eye. Because who have they killed, really? Probably no one. Back in my day, we all liked a man to have blood on his hands before he had any ideas about getting into our petticoats. Alex's grandfather's attentions in the marital bed were, in all honesty, a bit hard to deal with - I remember the time wen he approached me, seething, dressed like Superman, when he jumped off the wardrobe and hurt his leg, but, all credit to the man, he didn't do anything to me that he wouldn't have done to a German spy.

I admired his conviction, in other words, even if he looked terrible, and there's your answer, young lady.


Darque Lorde Mordant Carnival
00:27 / 10.05.06


I know this is supposed to be low snark but shut up Granny or I'll confiscate your gin.


Alex's Grandma
(prev. Alex's Grandma, the return.)
01:08 / 10.05.06


Not the gin, surely?

Not the gin.
 
 
Quantum
14:04 / 11.05.06
An exchange in the world cup thread-

Loomis exposed as a who sceptic

Ganesh *paints tardis on face, puts metal dog in window, chants 'oo-eee-oooo'* which made me guffaw at work,

then Bizunth pipped me to Bloody Whooligans.

Makes me want to lean out of a honking car waving a flag and singing
Gallifreee-eeey, Gallifreee-eeey, play awaaay
and
The Dalek team have got no legs, doo-dah, doo-dah and
Clunky boots and silver kit, all the Cybermen are shit and such.

WHO'S WITH ME! (sorry)
 
 
All Acting Regiment
14:44 / 11.05.06
I'M WITH MESSORY!
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
14:51 / 11.05.06
If only there were some kind of foot-stompin' dance anthem with a chorus of people chanting 'Dr Whooooo HEY! Dr Who!' Over and over. With a mention of the tardis in there somewhere, and some dalek voices. But that would be madness.
 
 
Quantum
14:56 / 11.05.06
Madness, I tell you. WHO would sing such a song?
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
14:58 / 11.05.06
New thread! HEY!
 
 
Loomis
15:00 / 11.05.06
I prefer to sing "Who! Huh - Good god. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing - say it again!"
 
 
Olulabelle
20:48 / 11.05.06
Doglikesparky on an article about sleep:

... but the article had a picture of some bloke in a white lab coat printed near it so it must be true.
Oh yes.


Oh yes indeed.
 
 
Quantum
22:31 / 11.05.06
Spyder apparently objects to the Bush administration's phone tapping and has this message for George;

I hope vultures gnaw out your eyes while you have sulfuric acid injected into your scrotum!

..in the Headsick/Rage thread of course.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
00:30 / 14.05.06
And are they all men?

No, silly, they are Devo.


cube, quip as a whip, in the original Doctor Who thread.
 
 
Quantum
16:30 / 15.05.06
Ultimately I believe that magic is about allowing the 'mundane' to become the conduit by which holiness is made manifest to us.

Mordant Carnival, clever as ever.
 
 
Baz Auckland
02:34 / 16.05.06
From the Help with T.Rex lyrics thread

Stoatie: D'ya know, Marc Bolan was born not five hundred yards from this very computer at which I sit?

Gridley: Damn, that's one old computer you're using. How often do you have to change the vacuum tubes?


...nearly made me spit coffee on the screen...
 
 
All Acting Regiment
04:08 / 16.05.06
Now that the garbage is in space, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions.

Triplets!
 
 
matthew.
02:06 / 17.05.06
This is the American dream gone terribly wrong. The land of opportunity seems to have become the land of limited human rights.

new-comer Phallicus with either crazed overexaggeration or an adequate summation of the immigration issue!
 
 
Korso Jerusalem
02:08 / 17.05.06
Wow, I've been quoted on my first day. I'm honored.

That line, anyway, is accurate enough.
 
 
Our Lady Has Left the Building
07:10 / 17.05.06
(id)entity, in the Bisexual 101 thread, with the words: if I could REALLY make people bisexual, I don't think I'd bother labeling my sexual fantasies as True Justice—I'd just throw the concept of justice out the window. I'm not THAT moral.

(id)entity, off sick the day they covered 'with great power comes great responsibility' in school.
 
 
Gypsy Lantern
09:10 / 17.05.06
I find your posting style to be like that of an excitable, drug-addled child. I am unfortunately impatient with children, and more so with children who appear to be on methamphetamines.

(id)entity, minding the daycare centre - I mean, the temple.
 
 
Ganesh
11:46 / 17.05.06
Actually, children on amphetamines tend to be less hyperactive...
 
 
Quantum
14:26 / 17.05.06
Kids on meth are *less* excitable than Temple posters? I can believe it.

maybe today i got up with nazi drives, sorry. s3r3bro
I don't know what it means but I'm quoting it anyway, along with What a shit of thought!!! . I know English is a second language and all but I thought that was great, I'm going to use it in conversation every day.
 
 
*
15:03 / 17.05.06
D'oh, Ganesh, you're right. I should have picked a different drug. Maybe I got up today with pharmacological drives.
 
 
Joy Division Oven Gloves
21:24 / 17.05.06
From the interview thread

Mathlete -
In the film Way of the Gun Benecio Del Toro is in an interview to become a sperm donner, and is asked "What do you think makes you qualified?"....

Xoc -
'to become a sperm donner'

Is that when they've run out of chili sauce and just improvise with what comes to hand?


I was at home to Mr. Giggles all day after this. Thankyou.
 
  

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