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barbequotes

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Dead Megatron

17:19 / 31.05.06

I have no idea what you mean by that. I am Barbelith's last voice of reason...

haus of fraser

09:49 / 01.06.06

Anna de Logardiere:
"BUY KIT KATS I NEED TO GO IN AND HELP THE BULLIED CHILDREN."
In the Big brother thread, bringing a smile to my face while i catch up on all the missed action of last night...

(self awarians please VOTE SEZER 84444 BTW)

Cat Chant

12:23 / 01.06.06

Is it very shameful that I really like it when Ganesh indulges in sheer camp? See this comment about, um, Grace(?)'s take on Richard in the Big Brother thread:

Quelle shitbag.

Ganesh

12:29 / 01.06.06

I did actually worry about whether it should be quel shitbag.

Whisky Priestess

15:20 / 01.06.06

Hmm - let's see ...

Il est un sac de merde - quel sac de merde!

Merde is feminine and sac masculine, so technically, given the word order of the French version, I think it should be quel - but I reckon you could get away with it by claiming that you wanted to emphasise his shittiness rather than his bag-like qualities.

Ganesh

15:22 / 01.06.06

Merci.

praricac

18:31 / 01.06.06

Professor Silly and FinderWolf play it for yuks on the 52 thread in comics:

PS: ...that Black Adam: what a clown!

FW: He sure does rip a lot of people in half, doesn't he? (or drive his fist through their skulls)

All Acting Regiment

21:25 / 03.06.06

EC:

Oh Grace, Grace, Grace. Don't like the freaks eh? Well I've seen this one before and I can tell you how it ends up.

Grace the Bird Woman! Stumping around covered in feathers.

Gabba gabba hey!

Ganesh

21:38 / 03.06.06

That one scared me slightly.

Evil Scientist

15:52 / 04.06.06

I actually want to climb through the television screen a la Ring and slam her face repeatedly against a hard surface - perhaps the edge of the pool - until she stops spouting bile and starts spouting blood and cerebrospinal fluid.

We're on the same level Ganesh, and you know it.

Shrug

15:57 / 04.06.06

My dad is a big fundy and one time my SO said to him, "How can you think Bush is a Christian? He's more like the Antichrist!" and my dad answered matter of factly, "You know, you might be right. I've considered that he could be." And yet you voted for him twice. Oh, dad.

Ibis and hound. Very amusing, it's the "Oh, dad" at the end that really does it, I suppose.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

22:21 / 05.06.06

Get going, chaps and chapesses and people of varing self-identified chaposity.

Chaposity = BEST.

diz

08:22 / 06.06.06

Legba Rex in the ENGLISH ONLY! thread:

This is America. Speak Sioux.

I can't believe I beat everyone else to the barbequote thread with this.

Regrettable Juvenilia

08:40 / 06.06.06

The whole of Alex's Grandma's Andrew Motion poem is quote-worthy, particularly the lines:

You may say 'Old lady, you seemed over-refreshed'
But I think it was mainly that I am not blessed
With the charms of an inguenue.

And:

And even though you still vaguely resemble the actor Charles Dance,
And I'd probably do you, given half the chance...

Triplets

08:58 / 06.06.06

That's a beauty. I have to admonish the old girl, though, for making me laugh at loud in work with those last two lines. Simple things and simple minds.

Ticker

14:53 / 07.06.06

Gypsy Lantern:
I dunno, ten years in and it feels as if I'm only now starting to get a glimpse of the real stuff. Magic is a Big Game. No, even bigger than that. There is so much depth, and a lot of it can be readily accessed by exploring the deeper mysteries of the world's magical traditions. If you don't do that, and learn from the magic bequeathed to us by our ancestors, you are just stuck in the workshop trying to re-invent the wheel over and over again, when you could be piloting a living, sentient were-spaceship through multi-dimensional space, as it were.

Brilliant.
I instantly wanted to go home and request my cat to assume his sentient were-spaceship configuration.

Quantum

17:40 / 07.06.06

You speak cat?

Nixon's social policies would put him squarely to the left of the mainstream Democratic party. That tells you a lot about the direction the country's been headed.
Jakegnosis chills me to the bone with a simple sentence. Watching all that Futurama recently had reminded me how loathsome he was, but I'd support Nixon's cryogenically frozen head over any Bush. Or Reagan, come to think of it.

Ticker

17:53 / 07.06.06

You speak cat?

More importantly (from said cat's POV), I am proficient in the universal language of opening the 'fridge.

Aertho

18:15 / 07.06.06

How so, George? Explain, please, you fucking dick. I wish he posted here so we could sic Haus on him and he'd cry.

Jakegnosis, on how best to Censor the President.

Cat Chant

08:53 / 08.06.06

More on the theme of censorship, but a different George this time: Mordant Carnival is the highlight of this very high-quality thread:

I think what we really need is a Grant Morrison Disappointment-O-Meter down the right-hand side of the page. People could click on it to raise the level and thus demonstrate visually exactly how gutted GM would be with the way they'd been treated.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

12:04 / 08.06.06

velvetvandal on Big Brother's Glyn:

Gutted that BBBM wasn't on last night, as I was looking forward to what Russell would make of Glynn's newfound ability to make sandwiches. Is his mind blown every time he orders a Starbucks panini? 'Wow, how do they make it? Do they pump the cheese in through a hooooole? Or do they bake the brrrrread arrrrroundddd the cheese? But surely that would make it a pie...'

I want to adopt Glynn, and to raise him up as my young ward.

For some reason "but surely that would make it a pie..." has been stuck in my head for days now.

All Acting Regiment

09:04 / 09.06.06

Finnish:

Haista vittu, Vento.

(It literally means "sniff the cunt" - Finland doesn't have Fuck you or Fuck off... although suksi vittuun literally means "ski into a cunt" and I think that makes up for a lot.)

Possible mysogyny neutralised by bizarreness?

Ummm, not quite?

Would it depend on whether the poster was male or female (-identifying?)

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

10:22 / 09.06.06

I would have thought so, yes.

All Acting Regiment

10:26 / 09.06.06

And I guess it also depends on how serious it's meant as an insult in it's own language. It could conceivably mean "you are very clumsy", but maybe not.

Char Aina

10:32 / 09.06.06

has anyone asked wembley?
y'know, either in thread(not yet) or by PM(hopefully)?

it might be an idea to have the conversation in the english only thread where the quote is from.
it is still quite visible, after all.

ONLY NICE THINGS

12:59 / 09.06.06

Lord of moonpiss. Will all of you just SHUT UP???!!!?

Anna makes a very good point very well.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

13:01 / 09.06.06

Seconding that one, and also adding from the end of the same post:

I'm gonna get this crying fakebaby on Big Brother right now and staple it to your faces.

Feverfew

18:27 / 09.06.06

From Jackie Susann over in the superstitious thread;

Just posting this so there won't be 13 replies anymore.

To my mind, this is either sweet, silly, or funny, and I like it because of the possibility of all these things.

Mon Oncle Ignatius

19:17 / 09.06.06

Stoatie neatly sums up the problems presented by both supposedly clever musical taste algorithms...

pandora.com's kind of fun, though it took me ages to figure out that the "challenging instrumental passage" in Black Sabbath's War Pigs was actually the guitar solo.

...and legends of rock.

Spyder Todd 2008

18:41 / 10.06.06

Yeah, it's been nice and quiet the last few weeks on that front.

(Although now I've said that we'll cut to a grave marked "Shadowsax", there'll be a rumble of thunder and a hand will shoot up out of the dirt).

Evil Scientist makes me chuckle.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

19:36 / 11.06.06

Quants losing his shit over in Books:

J.K.Rowling is the best living British writer? Ridikkulus! Accio Cyanide Capsule!

"She received nearly three times as many votes as the second-placed author in the list, the fantasy writer Terry Pratchett."
AAAAAARGH! *spews black bile from every orifice*

"The next three authors on the list are all Booker Prize winners - Ian McEwan, Salman Rushdie and Kazuo Ishiguro.
They were followed by the children's author Philip Pullman and the Nobel Prize-winning playwright Harold Pinter."
AAAAARGH! Pullman at 6! Pinter at 7! Harry Fucking Potter at 1!

"14. Iain Banks"
AAAAAARGH! Paging Dr Kevorkian! Emergency! KILL ME SOMEBODY!

Phex: Dorset Doom

22:50 / 12.06.06

(id)entity seems to have identified a flaw in Aquatic Ape theory:

The biggest problem with the aquatic ape theory is that it tries to explain something which doesn't need an elaborate explanation using a theory that doesn't make sense for which there is no evidence.

Bard: One-Man Humaton Hoedown

03:16 / 13.06.06

There's only you and me left alive, Legba. You should start walking south now and we can meet up about Milton Keynes and begin a new society. Our first act will be the eradication of your carpet beetles and the second: learning carpentry. You can build things and I'll do the cooking. One of us will have to learn how to breed, clearly, but we can argue about that at some later point.

Xoc brings his highly cultured and focused madness to bear on Legba's growing madness. Also, he brought up the subject of rage zombies and apparently the idea of turning Milton Keynes into the New Eden.

...and to think, I always just thought it was an annoying train stop. Shows me for ignoring the future importance of some places. God, next thing I know the Anti-Christ will arise out of Mimico.

...wait. That makes sense. Oh dear.

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