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Hmm. One approach might be to redefine what you mean when you think "nature". As someone else said, there is quite a bit of urban shamanism these days. The spirit of New York has kicked my ass more than once, though I think I'm starting to get an idea how to work with it more positively. There are many animals who are at home in cities these days - rats, pigeons, roaches, ants, lots more. And, of course, the albino alligators in the sewers.
Also, do you need to be "alone and in nature" to meditate? A still room works for lots of people.
Then again, I can't tell you what's going to feel right and/or work for you. As for your bad luck finding an animal so far - it almost sounds like you have some kind of a block going on - for one thing, maybe, that you're not entirely happy living in boston. In any event, be wary of predeciding, even a little bit, that something isn't going to work out for you, because you'll tend to be right. Or maybe you just need to try a different book.
If the animal spirit suggestion was what called to you then you should go for it. I wonder if some animal hasn't already been trying to get hold of you - try analyzing dreams, weird cooincidences, strong feelings about this or that animal, etc. Often with these things what works out happening is not You deciding to work with entity X, but entity X deciding to work with you, sometimes whether or not you like it. Prepare to be humbled and/or have your preconceptions knocked around.
Anyway - I suggested finding an animal or other spirit guide as a way to get to know yourself - as in, realizing that Squirrel or Spider or whoever wants to work with you might give you some hints about who you are that you weren't noticing or admitting. However it may be that before you can even get started on a finding-your-animal quest you need to do some introspection. What is it you're hoping to get out of this magic business anyway? What are you expecting it to do for you? What exactly do you think the word "magic" means? Why do you want to find out stuff this way and not some other way? Who, by the way, are you anyway and where do you come from? These questions are not trivial and you may never answer them, but thinking about it might get you started. |
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