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Text Adventure Game Emulator #1

 
  

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Alex's Grandma
10:02 / 27.10.05
Apologise to Robert. Explain that we thought he was passing us drugs. Ask if he'd like to order anything, then pull out the envelope, open it, and examine its contents.
 
 
Triplets
13:58 / 27.10.05
"Thanks, by the way"
 
 
Alex's Grandma
18:26 / 13.11.05
And then, shoot self in the head.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
20:18 / 13.11.05
Because it seems as if teh computer doesn't give a rat's ass any more.

That it frankly... doesn't care

It's all so depressing that I might, in fact, simply write a poem about this, right now.
 
 
Ganesh
12:56 / 14.11.05
And send it to Wizard.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
13:31 / 08.08.06
You say:

"Sorry, man. I thought you were passing me drugs. Thanks, by the way. Would you like to order anything?"

"I already ordered a cup of tea", says Robert, "But I feel like I've been waiting for it to arrive for the best part of a year."

The thought of such a delay makes you feel momentarily suicidal, but you shake it off.

You get the envelope out of your pocket, open it, and examine its contents. It contains a single piece of paper, printed on one side. You read what is printed on the paper. It reads, rather smugly:

SOME OF THEM ARE PROGRAMMED TO THINK THEY ARE HUMAN.

From behind you, there is a soft "pfft!" sound. A small red hole appears in Robert's forehead, and he slumps face down onto the table in front of him, revealing a much larger exit wound where the back of his head should be.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
13:40 / 08.08.06
Examine the remains of Robert's head for signs of machinery, bio chips etc, that kind of thing. Do this in such a manner as not to alarm the other customers. Then order a shot of tequila, a shot of gin, a shot of scotch, a shot of vodka and a shot of creme de menthe (all in the same glass,) and sit there staring at Robert's head for a while, pondering the evils of fate.
 
 
*
02:24 / 09.08.06
/join
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
22:07 / 09.08.06
The only way in which you can examine the remains of Robert's head for signs of machinery, bio chips etc, that kind of thing, without alarming the other customers, is to stay exactly where you are and "examine" his head wound by staring at it, slack-jawed, from your current position, not even leaning forward.

A waiter approaches, his consummate professionalism ensuring that he does not mention your companion's new state of being (dead). You order a shot of tequila, a shot of gin, a shot of scotch, a shot of vodka and a shot of creme de menthe (all in the same glass). The waiter disappears and you sit there staring at Robert's head for a while, pondering the evils of fate.

The waiter returns, and begins to hand you your drink.

There is a soft "pfft!" sound from somewhere behind you and the glass shatters, spilling green viscous booze and fragments of glass everywhere.

There is another soft "pfft!" sound from somewhere behind you, and the waiter falls to the floor with a small but very leaky hole in his chest.

What or whom do you wish to join? Perhaps the stream of customers who are now running out of the front door, screaming?
 
 
*
07:41 / 10.08.06
Affirmative.
 
 
*
07:42 / 10.08.06
Nix on the screaming though.
 
 
Evil Scientist
11:57 / 10.08.06
Try and make sure I'm running behind a tall, wide person. Alternatively hunch a little and use someone close to my height as cover.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:49 / 10.08.06
You join the rush of fleeing customers, positioning yourself behind behind a tall, wide man. As the muffled gunfire is coming from behind you, this does not protect you in the slightest, and merely slows you down, as the large man is not very quick on his feet, although plenty of large men are, I hasten to add.

A bullet strikes the large man in the back of the head, and he falls forward, smashing through the glass-paned door of the shop. You jump over his prone carcass and find yourself outside.

You are at a crossroads. It is mid-morning, and the sky is overcast. There are several people on the street here, running around in panic, weeping confusedly or, in the case of some teenagers in hooded tops, pointing at the café and the terrified or dead bystanders, and laughing, while filming the whole thing on their mobile phones.

Munt Lane runs to the South, curving South-East.

To the North, Munt Lane slopes down towards the seafront.

To the West is a dirt road surrounded on either side by run-down warehouses, which comes to an end after a few hundred metres, blocked by a metal gate.

To the East is a pleasant cobbled street, signed Acacia Avenue.

A quick audit of the buildings on each corner:

South-East: a music shop, open.
South-West: a garage, open.
North-West: an office building, open.
North-East: a coffee and cake shop where you could also buy booze, closed due to an ongoing shooting incident.
 
 
Persephone
14:46 / 10.08.06
> walk down dirt road
 
 
Triplets
16:41 / 10.08.06
Is there a building exploding behind us in slow-mo, Per?

> RUN down dirt road
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:26 / 11.08.06
You walk West, then break into a run down a dirt road surrounded on either side by run-down warehouses. Soon the sounds of the chaos outside the café begin to fade, as does the light. The sky is a thin strip of pale grey above you, bordered by the dark grey windowless warehouse walls.

You stop running when you reach a very high metal gate, which towers above you and bars your way to the West.

There is a panel set into the gate, level to your waist. Squinting, you can see the words 'SECURITY LEVEL 1' in faded red paint, above a slot about the width of a credit or bank card.

To the East, the dirt road runs back towards the crossroad.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
13:55 / 11.08.06
Inventory.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
23:23 / 11.08.06
You have on your person:

- a stick of 'Bad Faith' lipstick
- a large brass coin
- a watch
- a money clip containing 67 dollah
- the key to room 23 at a Dancing Bear Inn
- a further set of keys including the key to room 7 at the Dancing Bear Inn, a car key, a small key for a padlock or safe-deposit box, and a swipecard for the Abraham Facility
- a Library card
- a small slip of paper with a crude map drawn on it
- a Babelfish
- a mobile phone, with no battery
- the envelope Robert gave you before his untimely death
 
 
slinky
10:27 / 12.08.06
Lets try and get past this gate. Swipe the 'swipecard for the Abraham Facility'please.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
21:36 / 13.08.06
OK.

Sit down in a quiet corner, and consider what's wrong with this situation. Come to the conclusion that everything that's gone bad so far, like an old pint of milk turning grey in the fridge, only happened because of the guns. Or lack of them, actually.

Accordingly, fall on the earth and pray to whatever pitiless, stoner god (god can't be ... The Orb ... can he?) is up there for an Uzi, at least.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
21:41 / 13.08.06
Oh yeah, and look at Robert's crappy envelope.

Which, I'd be willing to bet, will provide no valid information.
 
 
kan
18:53 / 20.08.06
reboot
 
 
HCE
14:27 / 24.09.06
Status?
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:29 / 23.11.07
You slide the card for the Abraham Facility through the SECURITY LEVEL 1 slot. There is a quiet buzzing noise, and the gate slowly swings open.

To the West ahead of you, the dirt road carries on for a while and, you can see, begins to slope downhill and become a trench cut into the ground. Tall, dense foliage on either side means that if you go that way, you will soon be in darkness.

You sit down, but the dirt floor feels damp and cold, so you stand up again. You mutter a prayer to whatever pitiless, stoner god is up there for an Uzi, at least.

You get Robert's envelope out of your pocket again, open it, and examine its contents. It still contains a single piece of paper, printed on one side with the words:

SOME OF THEM ARE PROGRAMMED TO THINK THEY ARE HUMAN.
 
 
Quantum
12:30 / 23.11.07
GO WEST
 
 
Evil Scientist
12:34 / 23.11.07
Think: "Life is peaceful there."
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:39 / 23.11.07
You go West. It is peaceful there: the foliage around you seems devoid of birds or other animals, and so there is no sound to be heard.

The path descends, the walls of earth rise either side of you, and it grows more and more difficult to see. However, at some point you become aware that you have reached the opening of a subterranean tunnel.

Ahead, you can just make out that a strip of blue lights are set into the tunnel ceiling.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
12:52 / 23.11.07
Head back towards the bar in town, this time refusing to be played by the apparently arbitrary machinations of a largely absent god.

Sink into a state of near-catatonia, in which, paradoxically, the urge to live is sustained only by the need to kill.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
13:14 / 23.11.07
There is no bar here. Which direction do you want to go?
 
 
Closed for Business Time
13:27 / 23.11.07
GO DOWN
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
13:41 / 23.11.07
There is nobody here for you to go down on.
 
 
Closed for Business Time
13:48 / 23.11.07
Mission accomplished!
 
 
Quantum
13:55 / 23.11.07
FOLLOW BLUE LIGHT WHILST WHISTLING 'GOING UNDERGROUND' BY THE JAM
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
14:15 / 23.11.07
You walk West into the tunnel towards the blue lights, humming 'Going Underground' by The Jam.

As soon as you are standing underneath the first light, you hear a mechanical whirring sound behind you, and turn round in time to see a metal door slide down from a fitting in the roof you didn't notice.

You have no choice but to continue walking West. At a certain point, the dirt floor gives way to tiles, and the walls and roof are no longer earth, but cement. The ceiling lights grow brighter.

You reach the end of the tunnel, which is a T junction, with short corridors heading both North and South. Each end in a grey metal door labeled in the same red paint seen on the gate, but less faded. The door to the North reads 'LABS #1-23: SCIENCE PERSONNEL ONLY'. The door to the South reads 'FACILITIES / DORMS / MESS'.
 
 
Closed for Business Time
14:31 / 23.11.07
GO SOUTH
 
  

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