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Underground > Film, TV & Theatre >

Big Brother: Revenge of the Sixth.

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18:07 / 11.07.05

For those of you who haven't seen it Video Clips wot got done by Science and his mate

Please Everybody I beg of you stop the Craig/Morrissey comparisons before all my nice Morrissey connotations are destroyed.

OH GOD MY FRAGILE FUCKING MIND!

I'm hoping for a Hairdresser on Fire.

20:47 / 11.07.05

There's gonna be some trouble.
A whole house will need re-building
and everyone Craig loves in the House
will recline on an analyst's couch quite soon.

Craig is hated for loving (but I don't need a reason).

20:48 / 11.07.05

wow look, third from the right, that's Jimmy Carr isn't it?

22:37 / 11.07.05

More Nerys Hughes really.

03:47 / 12.07.05

So this is what you do for fun....(jesus). If the terrorists need to get at us they need to bomb the Big Brother house...now that would be tragic.

07:43 / 12.07.05

I know. We should really be doing something more revolutionary, like playing a hand of vampire cribbage.

Craig now looks Dale Winton doing Tenko.

16:09 / 12.07.05

Good God. From what I can glean from live updates on Digital Spy, this week's nominations/voting is incredibly convoluted. As y'all might be aware, the Diary Room was open for housemate nominations during the unsocial hours of 6 and 9am yesterday - but nominating wasn't compulsory. In this week's spirit of "they might be lying" paranoia, all the housemates entered the Diary Room between these hours but only Craig, Anthony and Kemal actually nominated; the rest just chatted to Big Brother.

Nowww it seems Craig, Anthony and Kemal are immune from eviction. The public can vote for all the others, and those two housemates who get the most public votes will face eviction. Come Friday, Davina will ask the housemates themselves to decide the fate of the two up for eviction ie. which one will stay, which one will go - but Craig, Anthony and Kemal will not be allowed to take part in this group decision.

Hmm. Bit arcane, innit? Up for grabs are Eugene, Orlaith, Makosi, Vanessa, Derek and Science. I'd imagine Vanessa would be one of the least favourite (ie. most public gerremout votes) but which of the others is also likely to be up there? Derek? Eugene? Makosi? More than any other year, the public favourites to win or be evicted have waxed and waned. With such a mercurial voting demographic, who's to say which housemate will be going?

18:01 / 12.07.05

I haven't been watching enough of this lately, but isn't Vanessa a bit too bland to racked up much in the way of viewer contempt? She doesn't seem to have 'done' anything except eat and her hair. I mean maybe that's enough, but still, I wonder.

Eugene seems too confused to be all that despised, plus there'd appear to be the possibility of some kind of crack-up there (egg-xcellent..) Derek I think might make the last three, and Science beat what appeared at the time to be almost insurmountable odds last week, so...

So I'm guessing Orlaith (since that night in the jacuzzi she's been on borrowed time with the Big Brother audience I fear - it seemed like a case of a bit much too soon, in that she hadn't earned the right to get torrid in the pool with Makosi and Anthony; it certainly stuck in my craw, I can tell you,) and Makosi (untested with the viewers so far, but I'd imagine, or, ok, I like to think, that a lot of people out there must intensely dislike her,) up for eviction, with Orlaith to go.

Anthony out the door next week ? It's highly unlikely, but if I was producing this show I'd be doing whatever I could to make that happen, however underhand.

Tryphena Absent

20:50 / 12.07.05

All the housemates know that [insert housemate name here] has a g*m*pl*n. Yes Vanessa, you're the only person who doesn't have one. Yes Makosi, Kemal couldn't possibly just be reacting to your abhorrent behaviour towards him, could he? Yes, Eugene is a sly genius Craig, that's why he talks to Derek. *sigh*

Tryphena Absent

20:53 / 12.07.05

Have I mentioned today that I hate Craig? I didn't think so. I hate him because all I can hear is his whiney, whiney voice ringing from my TV.

tea and biscuits

21:27 / 12.07.05

I was impressed with the shot tonight showing Craig take a very obvious and delighted look at Anthony's bare arse. (And by impressed I mean: I feel dirty inside.)

22:28 / 12.07.05

Please forgive my laziness at not wanting to read the whole of this thread, but could anyone enlighten me as to the (self-professed) sexuality of Craig? I haven't been following BB at all, but I get the impression from everyone's innuendo that he appears to have a bit of a crush on Anthony, though I'm not sure if he's officially out or not.

22:37 / 12.07.05

I'm really sorry, Nobody's Girl, but Craig's sexuality is hideously complex, and it's difficult to grasp it without reading the whole of the thread...

22:42 / 12.07.05

...Whoa. That bad eh?

22:44 / 12.07.05

Why would you want Anthony out now? He's managed to form an uneasy alliance with Science and Eugene since the last eviction and that'd look, to me, like the only thing stopping the entire show from becoming completely boring. Without him, you'd lose any sort of tension. Derek isn't interested in arguing with Science any more and everybody else is on the Makosi badwagon, something which Anthony's departure wouldn't be likely change. Craig would snivel his way back in with them quick enough, Science would go back to floating around the edges of the group and letting out the odd nonsensical yelp, Eugene would still be Eugene.

Vanessa is creepy precisely *because* of her blandness. She's a vacuum that's been filled with nothing but constant repeats of Trisha.

Whisky Priestess

23:05 / 12.07.05

I think Eugene and Vanessa should be FORCED to have sex with each other, on pain of their families being held hostage and tortured. Any resulting child would be made property of the state and experimented upon to see whether it really is the ultimate apotheosis of dullness.

Just, y'know, cuz.

23:56 / 12.07.05

Why would you want Anthony out now?

Because of what it might do to Craig's fragile & sensitive soul. He nearly fell to pieces last time he was nominated, so as to what he'd get up to if deprived of his sweet prince, in a house full of people he 'just doesn't respect...'

Well I mean for fucks sake, like, god...

Also fairly amused, though it is a bit tragic, by the misapprehension that Craig appears to be under vis a vis Anthony, Maxwell and Saskia (who's the cover star of this weeks Nuts magazine, incidentally, and she might 'do anal' if she met the right guy - food for thought there everyone!) and their lifelong friendship.

'Gollum,' I'd tell Craig, if I could be bothered, so perhaps not 'Was after all only a means to an end.'

00:02 / 13.07.05

Would Craig, do we think, 'do anal' for the right guy?

Tryphena Absent

00:07 / 13.07.05

Nobody's girl: Craig is basically gay but doesn't want anyone to know it, except he does because he keeps telling people but he doesn't because he says so. He's locked into this kind of self-obsession about his own sexuality and delights in 'rejecting' it while succumbing to it. His sexual impulses encourage him to gaze longingly at Anthony's arse but he revels in the idea that his parents don't know. He's just vile really. And whiney. And vile. He told Saskia and Maxwell that he fancies Anthony but somehow thinks that he has concealed this from Derek, who naturally knows all about it.

00:08 / 13.07.05

He would have to be blindfolded, Dr G, like, his parents might be watching, d'you know what I mean ?

Tryphena Absent

00:09 / 13.07.05

Would Craig, do we think, 'do anal' for the right guy?

Euuuuuggghhhhhh, noooooooooo, how can you say such a thing Ganesh?????? That is such an insult.

(Yes)

00:19 / 13.07.05

Nobody's Girl: Nina's account is essentially correct, but ignores the BDSM strand of Craig's sexuality which is, IMHO, the element which defines his sexual identity. In other words, identifying as a submissive is more important to him than identifying as a gay sub or a straight sub. Craig seems to recognise his submissiveness, and it's perhaps the only honest thing about him: he's referred openly to himself as a "servant", a "slave", a "gimp" and a "dog". There's the hint that he's had intimate/sexual relationships before, but his evident enjoyment of provoking and being the butt of physical play-punishment from (straight) males suggests this is a particularly gratifying scenario for him.

Tryphena Absent

00:40 / 13.07.05

Oi Ganesh, I didn't ignore it, I forgot about it. My mind was clouded by Craig's face gurning at me from my television screen.

00:42 / 13.07.05

That's okay, Nina. I forgive you your gurning-distracted vanillacentricity.

Tryphena Absent

00:47 / 13.07.05

I think his submission is characterised for me through his contrary attitude to his sexuality, which is probably why I didn't remember it. It's so interlinked that I don't remember to clarify it.

00:53 / 13.07.05

I think the homo/hetero aspect of his sexuality is very much secondary, so it's perhaps unsurprising that he's neither here nor there.

02:03 / 13.07.05

Is anyone anywhere going to want to make love with Craig after his performance on this ?

He could have handled himself a bit better, Craig, bcouldn't he?

*

06:22 / 13.07.05

I've been lurking on this thread, which is sort of ridiculous since I have no access to actually watch this show and so I am mostly lost. But it occurs to me that Craig's submissiveness could explain his strange/ambivalent attitude towards his preference(?) for men. I mean, the thing he seems to get out of the whole "gay/not gay" thing is humiliation, am I right? Perhaps he's more drawn to the humiliation of having repressed homosexual urges than he is to either men or women.

Or this is what Ganesh and others have been saying all along, and I've missed it because I'm a dunce and also am not watching the show.

09:02 / 13.07.05

But it occurs to me that Craig's submissiveness could explain his strange/ambivalent attitude towards his preference(?) for men. I mean, the thing he seems to get out of the whole "gay/not gay" thing is humiliation, am I right? Perhaps he's more drawn to the humiliation of having repressed homosexual urges than he is to either men or women.

That's not qui-i-ite what I've been saying. Rather than having contrived the "am I or aren't I?" situation as another means of provoking humiliation, I think Craig is 'homosexual' in that he prefers punishment/humiliation by males to punishment/humiliation by females. I think he's appeared to be needlessly closeted about the gay/not gay thing for fairly commonplace reasons (worries re: parents' reaction and loss of status among peers; values masculinity over 'campness/effeminacy), but also because it's not something he's actively sat down and tackled because it's not the primary strand on his sexuality. Submissiveness is, and he seems to have thought this through to the extent that he's a) accumulated the language to talk about it, and b) self-aware enough about it to talk honestly about it.

10:21 / 13.07.05

'Hello... Is that Dr G? (sotto voce,) Oh bollocks mum, it's just a machine... What ? No, ok, ok... Mum get a fucking life yeah ?

'Sorry about that... Ok, Hi... Hi... My name is Craig. From Big Brother? I was sitting at home basting 'small Craig' in lard the other day, yeah, (*giggles*) and doing a google search on my name, and this message board came up! So I got the researchers at Endemol to get me your home phone number... Aren't I naughty... Anyway, really interested in the insights you seem to have on my sexuality, I mean I've never felt so understood, god, so I was just wondering if we could meet up and talk about my problems, yeah ? Not that I'm a fucking saddo or anything, but, y'know... Well you understand, right? Not like that tosser Anthony...

'Anyway don't worry about phoning back, Dr G, Channel Four got me your address as well, honestly they treat you like royalty, god, so I'll just come round one evening shall I? Really looking forward to it... See you soon!'

Click.

11:10 / 13.07.05

ENDEMOL R TEH MEN IN BALCK!!!!1!!

11:17 / 13.07.05

Don't do that Ganesh, you freaked me out.

Serious though. I've been detoxing from BB since the middle of last week. But I feel rested and ready to re-apply the lower portions of my brain to hating the surviving housemates again.

Then I find there's some kind of problem getting onto the News section on C4's BB site.

So what did I miss? Was Maxwell hi-larious in his eviction interview? Did Saskia meet him with kisses and promises of further blow-jobbery?

12:20 / 13.07.05

more importantly; is he the 'right man' to christen her other hole?

13:22 / 13.07.05

Well, I'm hoping she hasn't seen him since she got evicted. The thought of them breeding is too horrible to contemplate.

ONLY NICE THINGS

13:34 / 13.07.05

Then let's hope the answer to tosky's question is "yes"...

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