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Urgh! Fuck!: A thread for untamed hate and anger [PICS]

 
  

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Brigade du jour
04:56 / 19.12.02
Ok, (clicks his fingers in preparation) here goes ...

Littlejohn, Littlejohn, you forgot Littlejohn! How could you forget Littlejohn, the man is a troll!

Every single paranoid fucking article in any newspaper about fucking 'war' fucking 'against' fucking 'terrorism' (hereafter known only as TWAT). Every time I read another warning about how terrorists (or 'tourists' as Bushwhack pronounces it) are going to blow up the Eiffel Tower, Canary Wharf, the Taj Mahal, Ayers Rock, the Brazilian Rainforest and Oxford Street on Christmas Eve (mind you I've had the urge myself with the last one), well let's just say my blood pressure rises imperceptibly.

How's that for an understatement Stoatie?
 
 
Saveloy
09:38 / 19.12.02
People who come into work with a ****ing disease, make a big show of moaning about it ("cough cough, groooo, moan, urrrrhhhhh I'm dying") sneeze it all over your face and then, when you say: "Ooh, you sound awful, I'd go home if I were you" reply: "Oh, it's not that bad really..." It drives me knucking futs. Usually they do f**k off eventually, but only after they've had long enough to give it to everyone else. Cants!

Of course, if you persist and say "no, seriously, I think you should go home before you give it to everyone else," they'll reply with a set of facial movements that says "well, I don't think that's likely to happen" or "well, I don't really care about that," or even "well, why should I be the only one to suffer?" AAARRGGGGHHHH!
 
 
The Natural Way
11:16 / 19.12.02
I know it's a thread about HATE, but I LOVE that TWAT acronym.
 
 
Brigade du jour
19:37 / 19.12.02
Thank you kind one. Took me about five minutes because I read newspapers for a living and had the full phrase rammed down my throat 400 times in a week. It wasn't so much a joke as a sanity-preserving mechanism.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
21:00 / 19.12.02
Oh, it doesn't fucking matter. Edited because I'm tired and strung out.
 
 
Charles Darwin
23:53 / 19.12.02
Wonder what should you do when you're first admitted into a psychiatric on your first day? Do you wanna approach and talk to a guy who keep walking in circles or u care to join in to pee with another person peeing at the side of the ward? What you should do is to place a high table in the middle of the ward, strip naked, run the whole 9 yards, leap onto the table and utter or let out a war cry like the last of the Mohican screaming "I'M NOT MAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!!!!" Then smile to the nurse and ask how's her day.
 
 
Baz Auckland
14:39 / 20.12.02
ARRGH goddamn news today. Powell says that Iraq's declaration of having no weapons is grounds for war(??!?!), and that the inspectors should "spirit Iraqi scientists and their families out of Iraq"(?!?!?). The date's set for January for war now. Godbloodygrrr!
 
 
Sax
15:06 / 20.12.02
The desperation of the PR people who phone at Christmas with pointless and rather ridiculous attempts to get some product placement in regional newspapers, to wit the poor soul who phoned today and asked if I'd be interested in running a feature about Bacofoil, which is absolutely perfect for sticking between your mince pies and your baking tray so when you take your festive treats out of the oven they don't stick to anything.
 
 
The Natural Way
14:35 / 06.01.03
I back. With hate. And that last FUCKINGSHITBASTARDFUCK halfhour. We've all been here before. We hates it, precioussss. Yes we do. You will not believe the how long the last ten minutes have lasted. I grew a beard. No shit. I grew a beard.

Stomach Ulcer? HATE? You betcha. There's nothing like an undiagnosed stomach ulcer to fill the mind with worry, the body w/ pain and spirit the entire BEING off to fucking casualty on Xmas eve. On the mobile speaking to my bro:

"having a nice time getting pissed w/ all our mates, you fuck?"

And now that it is diagnosed? HATE? You betcha. It will not just. fuck. off.

GYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
 
 
The Natural Way
14:42 / 06.01.03
And those FUCKS! Those FUCKS on the train w/ their stern heads and their crackling broadsheets - they're still there! And they couldn't WAIT to get back into action, back into the office, back to work...with their stupid serious heads. FUCK! Why won't any of you bastards commute - you sick, sick fucks - and see! See this shit! There'd be none of that live and let live shit going through yr minds if you had to spend a year on a Connex train w/ these people and their sensible..gggy..urrGh...bastaAAAARDS!!!

I made this thread. I love it. It answers a deep need.
 
 
Charles Darwin
18:36 / 06.01.03
And I curse the economy!!!!!!! Though I would like to curse it everyday if I could remember.
 
 
HCE
19:11 / 06.01.03
Queue-jumpers of every stripe. It's less having to wait for one more parking space or theater seat that I mind, than the attitude implied by such behavior: namely that the QJ is a Higher Being and the rest of us are scum that don't also have someplace to be, that didn't also pay for tickets, etc.

People who ask me questions while I'm on my lunch break. I am turned away from my monitor, my glasses are off, I'm wearing headphones, and am cramming a sandwich into my face for all I'm worth. How could I possibly be mistaken for somebody who's on the clock?

These two seemingly small intrusions inspire fantasies so violent that I begin to question whether I am wholly sound, mentally.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
19:45 / 06.01.03
Bloody losing things! I am always, always losing and leaving things and it makes me want to bang a hole in the wall with my head because it's my own stoopid careless fault. Example: this morning (first day back at work, 20 mins late) I managed to a) lock myself out of the house by leaving my keys at home and b) lock myself out of the office by forgetting my security tag.

And this evening I've just lost half of my absolute favourite pair of black leather silk-lined gloves. I loved those gloves, man. They were perfect. And more to the point, how much of a blasted fuckwit fo you have to be to lose just ONE glove????

Argggggggggg.................
 
 
Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!
17:53 / 26.01.03
Good god I hate the Libertines.. I just... I can't stand them. I can't stand people coming up to me and going on about how good the Libertines are. They're not. They're really, really not. I just can't understand it, I just... they just sound second rate, absolute messy dirge music. And the two frontmen... oh, fuck off! I dislike their faces. Their bassist (I think, it's hard to notice him) is so generic in his indie looks that he is almost invisible. Honestly, if you manage to take note of his actual existence you're doing well.

And these people always say "but how can you not like them...?!"
Because they are quite clearly shit. Quite simple.

And then they ask me if I like the Datsuns.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
21:16 / 26.01.03
THE SUN!

Fuck the sun.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
22:22 / 26.01.03
I've just read through it in its entire glory. I *love* this thread.

this one may get me grief, but I don't care. Small children in pubs. There are two sides to this...

Part 1: Went for a quiet afternoon drink to a lovely pub which is often horrendously busy in the evenings with a friend. We had alot to talk about and for a while it was lovely to be able to talk and relax together.

Suddenly there were mewling infants everywhere, crying, knocking over drinks, demanding attention. Crying some more. Our quiet oasis became hell on earth.

Part 2: there's a puritannical bit of me which thinks its bad to take kids places where there's going to be a lot of smoking going on, can't be good for 'em, surely, they don't get a choice, do they?

Just generally bad. But yeah, you know it's my own selfish pleasure I'm more bothered about.
 
 
Dances with Gophers
09:19 / 27.01.03
Those little bits in a certain company's software that are designed to ruin yer day and steal away a little bit more of your soul. The function to automatically reformat incorrectly your numbers to screw up your calculations. The small dialog boxes in wizards and the long preamble placed something like "table or query" in front of table names so all you can read is a long list of "table or query" and can't actually read the table name. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!

I feel better already!
Cheers
 
 
The Natural Way
12:28 / 27.01.03
You "like" this thread, eh Bengali? You "like" this thread.
Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarkin' FUCKBASTARD! I hate YOU! You hear me? I HATE YOU! Oh yes, you may well "LIKE" this thread....oh yes....

Excuse me.

Now, on with the show:

THE NOW NEAR LEGENDARY 'ROCK BEAUTS'.

If any of you happen to pass by the Amex building in Brighton sometime soon, don't forget to drop in and maim the guys in the money counting dept. - a punishment far better than they deserve for throwing up this monstrosity, believe you me. Aaah, 'Rock Beauts'..... Originally conceived as a greatest hits of 80's soft rock compilation - a silly little CD to be knocked up and shared amoungst a small group of friends - 'Rock Beauts' has begun devouring taste Brightonwide at an alarming rate.

Last Saturday at the Fraelyman's, pleasantly pissed and enjoying delicious dinnerani, when suddenly, quite out of the blue, the first strains of Toto's moody synth-fest 'Africa' (or whatever it's called) waft like a warm carribean breeze out of the speakers and into my booze-befuddles head. "No! Bad!!!! BAAAAAD!!!!" I try in vain to resist but soon find myself caught up in a whirl of blessing rain down in Africa, Poison! and cities built on rock and roll!

No! Noooooo!

We've all done this before a trinbillion times - everyone here must know what it is to do the post-ironic "We love Starship!" thing. It's so tired and old and boring, but, under the influence of the dreaded 'Rock Beauts', I find that stuff impossible to resist.... I start thinking about FREEDOM! FREEDOM and the USA! And Radio Africa!

'Rock Beauts' has to stop. We can stop it together.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
13:33 / 27.01.03
Actually, Runcible, I *love* your thread, and I *love* you.

HA. so *there*.

 
 
Jub
14:01 / 27.01.03
another one for annoying adverts.........

Baileys.
All of the recent campaign by them has annoyed me, firstly the guy not hearing his girlfriend say baileys and her doing a little oooh dance and kissing him. hm. Second was the pool playing contest with the pretty girl and all those hunky men. hm. But it seems they were saving the worst for last.
The man walks into the bar. Everyone there is generally wholesome good-looking. Great. love those people. The man walks to the bar and the lights go off. When they come back on a few seconds later it appears from his ever so shocked expression that someone's had a smooch in the dark.
uh-oh!!
So he looks around trying to suss out who did the deed, and he can taste the creamy richness that is baileys. A lady steps from the crowd and holds her glass to him in salutation. "Phew!" the audience is invited to think along with the man. That was close - could've been a hideous munter!
But wait a minute!! There's another one, and another! - what's going on?! all these gorgeous women all implying they've just snogged this man in the dark! No wonder he's looking confused. It's all been very impressive so far baileys marketing people! Then the "punchline". Another man holds his glass aloft to the man too! So it might've been a bloke?! oo er missus. Original man looks worried.
Then all the girls and the bloke who've all been drinking baileys with the new guy all start laughing like it's been one big joke - ha ha.
The thing is - these people must've planned this "joke" on their friend before he arrived. If it had just been a quick opportunistic snog in a genuine powercut, then why would anyone beside the person who'd kissed him raise their glass? And why would they all laugh at the end? The sad thing is, they *must've* planned it. They must have arranged to all be in the bar before him. They went to the elaborate lengths to get someone to turn the lights when he came in, not to mention all having full drinks of baileys, and standing near him when he came in.
They really don't sound like great people to be your mates. I can't understand why Baileys would allow them to represent them after displaying such schadenfreude.

Fucks me right off.
 
 
The Natural Way
14:17 / 27.01.03
The ad to cause me the most Fuckedoffitude recently has to be the one for the new Cannon product range. It's still uses that horrid late 90's trope of repeating *powerful*, *emotive* words like "together", "experience", "touch" and "BE YOU NOW" over a soundtrack of moving music and images of people enjoying life-affirming experiences with said manufacturers' products. Or something like that. Actually, maybe it doesn't have the people in it, but it definitely has the other stuff.

This whole ads-that-speak-to-the-soul shit is TIRED and awful and just plain evil. I moan about it all the time (long term fans will be familiar with my sporadic and occasional rants on this subject), but I will never cease to gripe until this fucking nonsense stops. If other countries have a Tarrant, I hope they all have a good fucking laugh at us and our eagerness to produce/buy into this insulting, meaning destroying bollocks.
 
 
Our Lady of The Two Towers
17:18 / 27.01.03
Fuck the week beginning the 17th of February 2003! Because there's now at least two cool things happening within it that I won't be able to go to.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
21:13 / 27.01.03
Fuck backpackers who try to get me to sign up for credit cards I don't fucking need when I'm trying to get to work, and then get narky when I say I'm not interested. Fuck! American Express Blue motherfuckers!
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
23:37 / 28.01.03
Hate and anger.

Because I can always but always think of a better, wiser, more worthwhile response than either. Impotent rage is, well, impotent and therefore meaningless, and when I can take action against the person or persons currently pissing me off I know I really shouldn't (faults on both sides, takes two to quarrel, seek not revenge but the Bhuddah, etc etc). Even when the anger and/or hate is/are completely justified, there's still much better things to be doing with my energies.

And yet I can't quite rid myself of those two evil twins.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
01:17 / 29.01.03
AAAAGH! Fucking lack of basic fucking research!
 
 
Matthew Fluxington
01:36 / 29.01.03
My deep burning hatred for George W. Bush was only grown deeper, stronger, and more righteous after watching his State of the Union address an hour ago.
 
 
The Natural Way
09:14 / 29.01.03
Well and good.

But what about CONNEX and RAILTRACK? What about those fuckers?

I feel so alone here - so sad and alone. I rant about the horrors of commuting and, judging by the lack of response, I think it's pretty safe to say that there isn't another Lither in the trainevil boat.

But here we go again:

Do you know how long it should take me to get home? Eh? An hr and 15 mins. And do you know how long it took me the other night? 3 fucking hrs. I arrive at Charing X at 5:45, for the 6:00, and what happens? Oh, train's been cancelled (massive signal failure at London Bridge; only one platform open for business), pick it up at Tonbridge...blah, blah, blah. Can't get on the first train (there's 4 carriages due to lack of rolling stock. Again. (have you any idea how packed a 4 carriage rush-hour train from Charing X is? Jesus... ALL. THE. TIME. AT. THE. MO'.)), so I make my way over the bridge to platform 3 and get on.... Anyway, to cut a long story short, I end up standing, jammed inbetween two men-made-of-office-and-beer-and-milk, for 2 hrs until we arrive at Tun Wells and meet the connecting train, which takes half an hr to arrive. I get through the front door at 9:00.

I know this is boring - I know this isn't a fun moan - but this shit IS boring...it isn't FUN. And it's everyday. Everyday - signal failures; freezing carriages; "a shortage of rolling stock", due to some bullshit technical malfunction; delays..... And if the temperature even approaches zero, the whole thing collapses.

My time in the evening is precious - it's MY time - and it's fast becoming time I don't have... Y'know it's a form of violence, this stuff, it really is. Definitely a worse fucking crime than loads of stuff that'll get you banged up. A fucking heinous crime. Think about it: there's 1000's of us and we all feel so fucking despondent and impotent and fucking awful - we really don't feel anything will EVER change. It makes me want to break limbs.

Today, one of the nicest people on my carriage - and this guy is always so happy and fucking laughy and always puts me in a good mood no matter how bad shit gets - just cracked at the guard. Just lost it, and demanded compensation for Monday's fiasco. And he and the guard went through the routine, both of them fully aware that that nothing could be done and the real perpetrators of all this grief would go unpunished... You see it all the time. We all know the train staff have as shitty a time as the rest of us (probably shittier), but, well..you get SO frustrated. Who can we punch?

It's not fair. Who can we punch?
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
09:29 / 29.01.03
I will sympathise, Runce (albeit from a safe distance - don't punch me. You'll break my glasses). Connex is a bag of crap, will dig out the stats later, in a hurry, but it's got one of the worst performance records in the country. Wonder how much the bosses earn?

But not as bad as the North London line. This is a backdated rant, but had to use that fucker for commuting for about 8 months, and believe me, it was worse.

Only used it for the last 20 mins of my journey, there were only three trains an hour at peak times, and at least once a week, often twice, one or two trains wouldn't be cancelled officially, but just wouldn't turn up. So i'd stand there for twenty, forty minutes, sometimes an hour, with no one telling me anything.

Services would sit at stations for 20minutes for no apparent reason.

This would happen both ways, and often on the way home, the trains would just terminate a few stops before mine (last stop. quite literally the end of the line). Again no explanation. Replacment bus service? HA! Fucking ha!

Leaving me to wait for a bus in the dark, or walk a couple of miles to get home. (and this was the service for City Airport. )

It once took me 1 3/4hr to do a 20 minute journey.

I hate you, North London Line.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
09:37 / 29.01.03
On a more prosaic note. My throat. Feels like someone's rubbed sandpaper all over it. Got about 3 hours sleep last night due to waking up every half hour or to hack away....

Ugh. it's really painful.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
09:58 / 29.01.03
If you are persuasive and persistent enough, you can usually get a callback from somebody in a more senior position than the guard, although you will probably feel worse after speaking to them than better.

I was caught in the saame thing on Monday - no trains from Charing Cross worth ther name at 5pm. Went to a cybercafe, sent some emails for work, had a pint with Flyboy, went back about 6:15, even fewer trains, lots of people milling around the concourse, took the tube to Elephant and a very very crowded bus home. Twenty minute journey took about 2 hours, not cvounting the time I spent hanging around in town hoping it would get better.

It's a cock, and when I used to commute in every day it was massively annoying to know that the 8:xx was less crowded, and if I didn't get that I would struggle to get onto the train before or after, and if I did get on I would be crushed up against lots of others in a horribly overcrowded train (and, for that matter, if anything went horribly wrong we would all be jampacked, unable to get out and probably doomed), and that if even one train was delayed the whole system would fall apart completely, then have to do exactly the same thing at London Bridge. In the end I found a route that doubled my ideal commuting time and involved a ten minute walk at the end, but was more reliable and less crowded. I dislike the fact that I had to do that.

But, you know, I know that lots of people don't have public transport even this regular. I tend to see it as a necessary sacrifice that has to be made if you want to work in London. I'd very much like that not to be the case, but it is. What really gets my hackles up are employers who fail to organise flexible work systems so everyone has to pile onto the same trains even if they don't have to arrive at their post at the stroke of 9, and bosses who then get heavy with people who have been held up trying to get in because of delays they had no control over, safe in the knowledge that nobody will be able to deliver the same criticisms to them. That pisses me off enormously, because it strikes me as an unfair use of power, and one that I saw lots of people on the end of when I worked in media sales.
 
 
The Natural Way
10:23 / 29.01.03
I know - those fuckers are just the worst. Terrible arseholes.

It's all very well headnodding the evils that exist elsewhere, but, really, this is here. And it's still a shit thing. There are people, my mother included, who are terrfied to leave their jobs in the city, for fear of not finding another one/losing their pensions/etc, and they don't feel they even HAVE a choice. As far as they're concerned, they have to commute. And it really takes its toll.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
11:03 / 29.01.03
Similar to Bengali: HAVING A COLD. Oh how I hate it. How I hate having sore and stinging eyes, a runny and bunged up nose that won't blow satisfactorily, the sneezles, and general aches and pains (and a sore throat, but suspect that most of that has to do with my going to a smoky pub last night like a fool).

I sneezed in front of the staff at Duke Humfrey's yesterday and they looked at me very disapprovingly - I'm too snotty to be safe around manuscripts, and constant nose-blowing disturbs they tetchy academics.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
11:11 / 29.01.03
Sympathise, kat. I was incredibly sneezy last night and was making a memory jar in class. For those who don't know, this is a common art therapy tool, often used with bereavement...

What you do is you colour salt with chalk dust and pour it into a jar to create patterns that express stuff for you. Now add sneezes/sniffles.

Nearly came to grief several times, and did manage to sneeze red dust all over the person next to me. Don't think they found it very therapeutic.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
11:19 / 29.01.03
okay, you've got me interested now, anyone know where we can find train performance stats?
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
11:25 / 29.01.03
Ah, Runce. I feel for you. I keep telling people about how I'd love to move to Right-On but would have to find a job there, and the fools say "you could always commute to London!". And I laugh. And then I cry.

What do I hate today? Very little apart from the Conservative Party, whose new policy on asylum seekers is *literally* "lock them all up"; and the Labour party, who seem to be increasingly keen on withdrawing the right to strike (shall we just assume that all political parties' names must mean the opposite of what they're supposed to from now on, eh?)...
 
  

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