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Underground > Film, TV & Theatre >

Big Brother 4

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11:50 / 26.06.03

Am I just tryng too hard to find racism?

Nah, it's definitely there in its 'ignorance' clothes. "Do you drink tea? Really?"

12:47 / 26.06.03

"While Ugandan Gae has a law degree, Tania is a shop assistant and admitted that she doesn't have the greatest career prospects." From Sky news

Who needs educating?

12:47 / 26.06.03

gaetano's homesickness was so vivid last night that i felt really bad for him. it's such a horrible feeling. it seems that he's really been hit with that culture shock feeling you get after the initial excitement & jet lag wears off.

pin, i know what you mean. when i was in india this man said i had a chubby face, and i was like, fuck off! but there it isn't an insult at all, it was like him saying you have white skin, blue eyes. & i do have a chubby face so whatever! i think tania *could* have laughed it all off but i get the feeling that being in that house must be emotionally claustrophobic.

it's weird, though, because i waas waiting for her to respond and say something like, "oh yeah? well, you're a man from africa" or something lame like that.

12:48 / 26.06.03

I hear the Pan African Big Brother house has brightly-plumed talking parrots instead of chickens. But they don't have a pig of course.

Wish I had cable so I could get a look at the house. Seems they have a friendlier Big Brother voice who chats back with you, instead of the Orwellian pretence, and there are bunk beds in the sitting room. Gae must be bored stiff, although a stiff Gae could only be a good thing.

12:52 / 26.06.03

xoc, check out www.bigbrothersa.com for bb africa news & pix!

13:25 / 26.06.03

Thanks suds, will do. I see from the C4 site that Gae's gone already, just when he was winding them up nicely. Guess Holy Willie will be back tomorrow then.

14:20 / 26.06.03

That seems a bit quick. Cameron is exempt from eviction for two weeks. Has he been yanked out cos of the atmosphere in the house?

22:40 / 26.06.03

Is Cameron coming back? I thought he was literally gone for two weeks. Mabe we'll get another African while we wait.

But that's not the problem. The problem is that we've slipped into some sick fucking alternate universe where Taia giving the production crew wood somehow means we loose Gae.

It's wrong. He was cool. He was the best thing on the show. Do the people involved not like their feet? I'm sure they are lovely feet, and if the production crew would just take some time to sit and think about how nice their feet were, maybe pamper their feet a bit more, stop taking it personally that Spanish feet instead of English feet were used in the BBC Summer adverts and for fucks sake get some perspective! They're just fucking feet! then maybe they would stop fucking shooting their own feet all the fucking time and we could have some good television.

Also, how shit must the Afircan house be if Gae thought ours was spacious?

23:00 / 26.06.03

I wouldn't be surprised to see somebody from another BB enter the house for a few days, with Cameron taking their place again. His being exempt from nominations for two weeks certainly suggests this, as does the "from now on you will be a representative of Big Brother."

23:09 / 26.06.03

He has to be a representative? How representative are we talking, when we bandy around the word representative? Are we talking like he's representing something in an acurate and true and honest manner, or are we talking door-to-door salesman type representing?

Because surely shipping a guy who burns, like, really easily off to a bunch of foreign destinations, on television, and demanding that he acuratly represent 11 resented, unwatched, boring, irrtating, lazy, dramaless cretins in Hertfordshire is just a fucking awful plan?

Do you think they only sent Wang Cameron off, keeping Wanghead Cameron locked in a box somewhere, and he can pick it up when he gets back, thus saving us the horrible, undignified sight of someone fucking doing something, and the rest of the world the horrile, indiginifed sight of Cameron bobbing around the world telling everyone he doesn't like drinking or sexxxing or laughing?

Alphonse commands you!

06:18 / 27.06.03

Now, now, I'm sure he likes it. It's just WRONG.

09:15 / 27.06.03

Yes, it's the Baby Jesus who doesn't like it.

Whisky Priestess

09:40 / 27.06.03

I think they're getting a bit desperate for viewers this series, because they haven't chosen as many annoying oddballs as usual (or rather the ones they chose got kicked out smartish, e.g. Anouska).
I wouldn't put it past them to spike the lager with Viagra in a bid for that elusive BB shag. Honestly, if they want them to cop off they shouldn't allow attached people with principles (or indeed standards) into the house.

Which reminds me of an idea Orr(?) and I had of making the next series BB on Drugs - where the housemates are given near-lethal quantities of drugs over the course of the series in the following escalating order:

week 1: alcohol
week 2: cannabis
week 3: LSD
week 4: speed
week 5: ecstasy
week 6: cocaine
week 7: heroin
week 8: crack
week 9: withdrawal! All supplies are stopped and we get to watch the last inmates go cold turkey. Reality TV meets Trainspotting!

10:34 / 27.06.03

Hehe, you should really be pitching this to Endemol, Priestess. If they think there would be money and publicity in it... And Lord knows they need to shoogle up the boring Brits somehow.

In the original Dutch house they got to smoke grass apparently. Can you imagine our lot with some skunk or some spacecake, lovingly crafted by Gos? Tania with the munchies would eat her way, piggerishly [sic], out of the house. The rest of them would just loll about, giggling (like Steph does at the moment) and talking rubbish (like Ray does at the moment).

We need more cruelty, BB! Like leaving just one of them out of the reward last weekend. Although taking Gae away and giving them Cameron back is pretty sadistic. They should do summat to challenge the boys' lazily macho posturing. Get them all in frocks or doing puppetry of the penis.

In this year of Orwellian commemoration, could they not turn the Reward Room into Room 101 with authentic cage for head and starving rats?

13:38 / 29.06.03

i just heard that anoshka is going to the big brother house in australia! it's all so *lame*!!!

16:02 / 29.06.03

And I would assume that an ex-australian housemate will be going into ours. There was something about somebody new in, so that would be logical. I thought that would happen, but didnt know if there were any other english-speaking BBs around at the moment. Also, the double-eviction would otherwise mean BB ends a week early (but i dont think many people are complaining...) which would have un-clashed with me going away. But ho-hum, tis not to be.

My favourite has to be cameron, now.
But good god, could there be any less chemistry in a house with mixed genders for 8 weeks?

17:57 / 29.06.03

Nope, no Australian for us. We get a monogomous, long-term relationship hetrosexual Welsh woman in the house as of Saturday.

While I haven't seen her in action, why the hell would they send in another women who sings Can't touch this naw naw naw naw! and dances a bit when someone tries to amke good television with her to make the house more interesting??

At least she has strong opinions, apparently, and so may actually fucking do something.

18:08 / 29.06.03

Did anyone else watch the BB Africa prog last night? Interesting to see how much more open and - yep - interesting Cameron is when he's with people who aren't emotionally retarded.

19:18 / 29.06.03

Yeah. He was well in there (in every sense)...

Whisky Priestess

12:12 / 30.06.03

Whoever it was (Xoc/Ganesh?) that suggested one of the housemates was going to be transgender is clearly psychic or has some sort of inside track - new bird Lisa Tuttle has hinted that she used to be (or still is?) a bloke. Which should prevent our homo-terrified boys from jumping on her ... for a while. I wonder if it's a ll a lie to keep the sex-starved Ray off her back.

And did anyone see the Daily Mail revelations about "psycho Nush"? Absolutely sleaze gold, that was. I really wish they wouldn't cop out every single series and bring a new bod in half-way through: it really upsets the balance and is pretty boring in the end. The newbie never wins. If they want to mix it up they should bring back one of the early evictees and and make them immune from nomination for the first week they're back in.

But generally, I agree. More cruelty, less rewards. Start hurting them and encouraging internecine strife by pitting them against each other. Only the strangest will survive.

Whisky Priestess

12:15 / 30.06.03

maybe we should add Viagra to the BB-on-drugs scenario?

14:16 / 30.06.03

Well, that certainly makes Lisa a little more interesting...

14:28 / 30.06.03

She still has scary, stary eyes...

Didn't we see pics of her as a kid on the BBLB Sunday lunchtime, m'boy? Were those not little girl photos? I was distracted from close scrutiny by Dermot's insistence on pronouncing her surname Genet instead of Jeynes, as it's spelt, as she did herself.

Her boyfriend looked very tasty indeed.

15:01 / 30.06.03

She could well be taking the piss - but it'd be very cool if she weren't...

19:46 / 30.06.03

I didn't see Psycho Nush, but the Mirror has started bemoaning how democracy is dyyyyyyyyying, because someone we voted out is going to Australia. Like, the fuck?? Suddenly the viewers opinions aren't important anymore...

Lordy Christ!

20:48 / 30.06.03

What surprised me about Fucking New Girl is that she seemed genuinly surprised that Nush and Steph warmed to her the most. That's not exactly a shock, when you consider even they are bored of their incessent "I thought you hated me!" "I thought you hated me!" "God, let's never fight again! I love you Steph!" "I lvoe you Nush!" like, every fucking day, punctuated with many visits to the diary room to inform the world how much they don't like each other.

Just fucking glass each other or, indeed, yourselves.

Whisky Priestess

16:30 / 01.07.03

I don't like her candy-pink lipgloss. I think she wears it because in the depths of the night, it fluoresces to attract her lost youth.

And bear in mind that Lisa is feeling "some awkwardness" beuween her and Steph after Lisa gave Cameron a head massage - I wonder why? Could it be that Steph's face resembles that of a bulldog chewing a wasp because Lisa has been (symbolically) screwing her (pretend-nearly) boyfriend?

Catfight between Lisa and Steph surely inevitable over the next two weeks, especially if Lisa keeps flirting with everything bar the furniture yet failing to deliver. Excellent. At last they have put a proper potential bitch in the house, and made sure she can act how she likes for at least two weeks.

16:56 / 01.07.03

OOooh I saw lisa and steph both mopping the floor at the same time, in an "my bit is cleaner than your bit" way. Oh the pettiness.

10:50 / 02.07.03

whisky, my friend, you are on the money: http://bigbrother.digitalspy.co.uk/article/ds4596.html

this series of big brother so far has been really fucking boring. all this africa and anoushka going to australia stuff isn't really spicing things up at all. thank god we are going to witness a real live row tonight!!

The Natural Way

11:00 / 02.07.03

Weeeeell, Lisa's a tit - which is something I'm surprised nobody here has mentioned yet. All that 'Many people say I'm powerful and gifted' crap: grow. the fuck. up.

She sounds like a 10 yr old me.

It's weird how parts of us remain very stupid children, innit?

I think there's a bit of a feeling on this thread (and perhaps in the general public at large) that the production team just, y'know, make it up as they go along. Believe me, months and months of pre-planning go into this stuff. It's not like everyone gets afeared halfway through and decides 'Hey, let's do a house-swap/add a new contestant'.

Whisky Priestess

16:34 / 02.07.03

I don't think they're just making it up, I just reckon that their carefully planned strategy is unimaginative and timid. Ker-az-ee - add another housemate halfway through! Just like last time! And the time before! Who would ever see that coming? It's nice that we all have a new person to hate but it won't last.

Basically my problem with BB is that it doesn't go far enough. In order to make people react and/or care, the stakes have to be high, the rewards and punishments far greater - like if the group fail a task they all have to choose one member of the group for instant eviction. No public vote - it's the group that have to make a majority decision.

Force them to fight amongst themselves, watch them suffer under the strain, that's what it's all about - it's the only way to make inherently dull people (which they all are now, sauf perhaps que Cameron) interesting.

17:18 / 02.07.03

I don't think anyone's going to argue with you, Runce.

Note to Lisa: sometimes a dream about a cat is just a dream about a cat.

21:53 / 02.07.03

Someone should take Lisa aside and tell her that the problem isn't that she talks about the outside world, but that she talks.

She's so wrong! At least people hate her. Is this Fed mk. II, where they again lobotomise the poor fuck before going on to try and provoke a reaction?

08:20 / 03.07.03

i hear runq too, but i reckon their planning takes account of a certain flexibility in their approach which is inevitably decided after the show's underway by press and audience feedback. if the rumours are to be believed the ratings on this series are lower,

[taking myself as an example i was a rabid fan of the previous series, i'm only familiar with this lot because i like the dermot show and it's on before hollyoaks]

there's clearly a load of standby plans which they may or may not use depending how things are going, viz. protecting the wholesome marketable characters like cameron from being evicted, sending the 'phit' one to oz in the hope she'll be in her bikini more, gatting an african alpha-male in to stir up the unconscious racism, getting a valleys slapper in who may or may not be [not be] a man.

this all stinks of jerry-rigging - the apparent simplicity of the format [strangers locked in a house going mad] is lost and it feels more like a load of trainee primary-school teacher's being tested by a bunch of tv producers a-fearing for their jobs. what does yr mum say about the backstage buzz on this one?

10:01 / 03.07.03

Four ways to make BB5 good:
1) unlimited alcohol.
2) getting rid of the rule which says you're not allowed to discuss nominations.
3) not letting anyone in who's romantically attached.
4) shock evictions. No one in the house will know if they've been nominated, the first they'll hear of it is when the door opens and two burly bouncer types come in to grab them and bring them out to Davina and the awaiting cameras.
5) having a plant housemate who's job it is to fuck people over and the veiwing public all knowing who it is.

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