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barbequotes

  
  

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Triplets
22:39 / 19.11.06
Quantum is Dave from "I'm a sleb" and I claim my five pounds.
 
 
Mon Oncle Ignatius
15:13 / 21.11.06
Stoatie relishes his bank's laptop getting half-inched in the unmasking thread:

In the interests of full, sticking-it-to-the-Man two-fingers-in-the-air revolutionary zeal, does anyone feel like posting their bank details up here?

...

(I of course don't have to bother. I have an account with Nationwide).
 
 
Dead Megatron
19:28 / 21.11.06
Emberleo says it all:

Try telling a four year old that her favorite cartoon heroes are less effective than real mythological beings when it comes to kicking monster ass!
 
 
Our Lady Has Left the Building
06:16 / 22.11.06
Ex and Stoatie in the 'Richard Dawkins is a fox' thread:

Ex He's married to one of the actresses who played Romana, y'know.

Stoatie And he still thinks there's no God. Some people, eh?
 
 
matthew.
03:58 / 23.11.06
This entire post made me laugh out loud at work. It's just the Barbelith-ness of it that makes me laugh.
 
 
Triplets
14:37 / 24.11.06
I call mine 'eXtreme !MARRIAGE!'.

!M! talking about his penis.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
22:54 / 24.11.06
Again with the naming of parts thread, Harrison deadpans his way into Barbequotability:

My girlfriend calls it 'GARGAMEL'. We don't get on.
 
 
Spaniel
19:12 / 27.11.06
Lula with the funniest most horrible thing I've read since I don't know when.

About breasts, well I like all the words for breasts. I like tits and boobs and the word breasts itself and jugs and, well, just everything. I don't even mind breasticles if I hear that because it's funny in a kind of Simon Pegg kind of way.

But. Once I went out with a man whose father (that's father) called breasts 'drinks'.

Reeefuckinaannnnk. Just so so so disgusting.
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
12:29 / 28.11.06
Boboss in the break up thread:

I don't do this, but... well... just this once.... BIG HUGGLES!

If you'd done this in any other thread B, it'd be a smack up the Biffins Bridge!
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
14:21 / 28.11.06
it'd be a smack up the Biffins Bridge!

Harrison, just above me in this very thread. Now there's a term I haven't heard in a while.
 
 
Triplets
06:23 / 29.11.06
lekvar, months back, in Books:

As rizla mentions, there is a scope to Lovecraft's stories that few other writers have been able to capture. He invokes cosmic scales and eternities where other writers say "it was big and old." Juxtaposed against this backdrop of Srtange Aeons is a claustrophobic, paranoid tale of a small protagonist who struggles to explain something bigger than the human mind can contain, like an ant trying to describe Scotland.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
08:57 / 30.11.06
And lo' in all my darkened nightmares, I could nary imagine what awaited me, as I peeled back the fur covered lip of yon stocking and peered through the inky blackness into that yuleish container.

For yon was contained a globule, marvellous compact, of an orange hue. Mottled was its visage and pitted also. But what afeared me most was the terrible emptiness that surrounded it, and the thought - ringing like the yuletide bells of some debased steeple - that my mother had skanked me out of chrimbo once more.

Bitch.

Christmas the Lovecraft way at lord nuneaton savage's house ...
 
 
Chiropteran
12:05 / 30.11.06
lord nuneaton savage brings the reality-check (re: Wolfmother):

They have songtitles like 'Woman'. What the fuck were you expecting, pro-tools?
 
 
The Natural Way
12:56 / 30.11.06
Boboss and I really do share one brain - thanks for doing the Lula barbequote for me, bro. I came on here to post about it and lo.......

'Drinks'?!?

Urgh!! Jesus!! What the fuck is wrong with that man? Is he friends with Harrison IRL?
 
 
Ticker
16:03 / 30.11.06
If it weren't apparently making people unhappy, it would be fascinating and rather delightful to see the means of identity production being ripped from the tyranny of the competent.

Haus in the Temple on the many forms of Otherkin.
I'm going to press tyranny of the competent to my heart like the fragment of pure brilliance it is.
 
 
Quantum
16:39 / 30.11.06
Ditto.
 
 
Olulabelle
20:08 / 30.11.06
Our Lady, in a gathering thread:

...indeed they are rather bad, like Santa going down on a ferret

That is bad. Really bad. And also I would wager, somewhat difficult.
 
 
Quantum
16:30 / 01.12.06
You are Egoic and rigid.
(Nutrient Value of Decay, to who cares, in the atheist/agnostic thread in Temple)

There's my next screen name right there.
 
 
Triplets
09:39 / 03.12.06
A few days ago I stumbled across the website of a young woman who believed herself to be a 'Fae'* and which detailed, among other things, her attempts to find her way back home to Faerie. Which is fine, except that said attempts to return home consisted entirely of taking barn-sized quantities of various psychoactive substances and several very serious, if ultimately unsuccessful, suicide attempts.

Mordant in the 'kin Otherkin thread. "Barn-sized"? Consider it nicked.
 
 
Papess
12:24 / 03.12.06
A carrot for Ev G in the Agnostic-Atheist thread in the Temple.

You may deny that a cricket bat has any sort of independent existence, but if I sneak up behind you and whack you in the back of the head with it, I suspect it will objectively impact your world regardless of whether you previously perceived it or named it.

(I would have used a carrot for the example, but whacking someone with a carrot just isn't the same.)

It's funny because it's true. Especially, the part about whacking people with carrots.

And I would like to comment on "tyranny of the competent" from Mr.Haus:
*whispers* The truly competent are not percieved as tyrannical, nor would they need to be.
Sorry if I am being nitpicky, but it was bugging me. Maybe, I am not seeing some apparent sarcasm that you intended.
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
14:28 / 03.12.06
OK, so I liked Preacher, but Our Lady certainly has a point when talking about the mooted TV series:

The real problem would be if there bares any relationship to the comic at any point. If it actually tries to be a faithful translation of that dried-up pile of machismo crap then it'll be a disaster. If it throws the comics out of the window, replaces the Preacher with a talking pony, and Herr Starr with another talking pony, and change the story to being two talking ponies trying to live and love in New York without anyone realising they are talking ponies, then this story will be a lot more interesting.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
14:28 / 03.12.06
Another from the Otherkin thread:

I used to be a gas-powered cooker in a earlier life.









I'm an ovenkin.

Triple Orgasm wins
 
 
unheimlich manoeuvre
15:01 / 03.12.06
You beat me to it, Stoats. Our Lady I'm still laughing.
 
 
Papess
13:48 / 04.12.06
In the Otherkin thread EmberLeo makes a lovely analogy:

I crave processed sugars out of an instinct to eat, and an instinct to consume things that change my Seratonin levels. Processed sugars, however, don't really fulfill either my nutritional or my hormonal needs to any adequate degree. That doesn't change the fact that I habitually persue them because of those needs.

And Quantum, follows it up with this sweet piece:

Yeah, Ember's candy metaphor works quite well- eating twinkies instead of learning to cook. It's not healthy

Which, translated into images of people worshipping twinkies and made me giggle like a drunken schoolgirl for a bit.
 
 
iconoplast
17:06 / 04.12.06
I just know that there are some poems I carry around like melanomas, That are with me everywhere I go - that pop out of the brain dome at strange moments and colour everything glory.

- lord nuneaton savage, in the "Reccomend me some poets" thread.
 
 
Triplets
11:47 / 05.12.06
a beautiful tunnel of ghosts:
Could someone explain for me how Ianto uses the water tower to relay a mobile transmission to the police? Does it have an antenna, or is it a function of its structure?

Ganesh:
Well, he can become sexually aroused by a stopwatch, so sending signals via a water tower is child's play.
 
 
Triplets
17:10 / 05.12.06
Stoatie, about the girltar

WHAT. And indeed, THE FUCK???

I believe a cultural archaeologist would term that a "wrongasaurus".

I nearly shit myself in reverse.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
21:42 / 05.12.06
Every time I watch a TV special or read an article on the different research and breakthroughs with robots, I also wonder why they don't combine their separate successes into a single robot? Don't know if I'm explaining myself correctly. For example, why doesn't some make a robot with the body of Asimo the head of Kismet and the hands of Robonaut? Would it be too expensive? Pointless without a proper brain?

Alex Thoth... dude, you are so baked.
-Stares at hands for 10 minutes-
 
 
Triplets
14:16 / 07.12.06
Finderwolf
I figured Grant would have Batman inject HIMSELF with the serum on a temporary basis so he would become a literal Bat-Man for a few pages

Quantum
See, that's the sort of thing I want from Grant, Bats' inner dialogue as he simultaneously undergoes powerful hallucinations while having an aerial battle against the ninja manbats.


!MARRIAGE!
Fucking hell. I think perhaps we need to be writing this comic. I'm imagining a splash page w/ Manbatman bursting out of his clothes, League of Assassins assassins sent flying by the transformation, complete with the caption 'Truly I have become the NIGHT!!', or something equally amazing.


Boboss
That would be amazing. We should form a fan-fic community and challenge Morrison for the bat-crown.


MacReady
Then all back to the Batcave for a bit of grappling!

Who's with me?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
11:03 / 08.12.06
I walked away from the doc's muttering to myself "fucking mental health...I'm not a fucking mental health case" and wanting to hit myself in the side of the head with my left fist, the one with the ring on ~ until I realised I looked exactly like a mental health case, and laughed so hollowly it was like falling down a well.

I know I shouldn't be giggling at other people's tales of misery and woe, but Starr of Wonder just puts it so beautifully ... love that "falling down a well" image too.
 
 
Olulabelle
08:15 / 09.12.06
Toksik is philosophical about GTA:

i havent even got out of the hood in san andreas, despite having played it for hours.

i spent at least 12 of those riding my BMX.
probably more.
i've invented tricks that arent programmed in(judging by the way some of the landings look -awkward) and i've racked up more miles by bike than by any other vehicle types added together.

at some point i noticed you don't get points or money for any of this hard work, but then i realised; you don't get points in real life either.
 
 
Triplets
02:24 / 14.12.06
Joyous Dave, without context

Really? You just wander around? And what kind of situations require the killing? Muggings? Cold latte?
 
 
Evil Scientist
07:17 / 14.12.06
The Mighty Phex effortlessly sums up the Iranian Holocaust revisionist conferance:

This performance, apart from being a way for assholes to connect with each other in a way not seen since the ending of Requiem for a Dream, is not for the benefit of the speakers though.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
11:39 / 14.12.06
Tsuga sums up how certain people can ruin the holidays for everyone in the Christmas CD mix thread.

I know a DL will be the only way for me, I'm gone as of Monday, and won't be back until after. Crap. Who hasn't sent theirs? You know you're killing the Spirit of Christmas. Not only killing, but mutilating and dismembering the corpse, dumping the various parts stuffed in plastic bags off random bridges. Not the present we were wanting.
 
 
Eloi Tsabaoth
14:33 / 14.12.06
Over in Huggle a Muggle, Mordant Carnival's truth is strong:

xk, you have stumbled across one of the immutable laws of the internet: There is porn of it. No exceptions.

Is there porn porn? Comprised of carefully shot footage of people shopping for porn, without ever seeing its contents or use?
 
  

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