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The official Ninja homepage! "These guys are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet."

 
  

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Margin Walker
17:54 / 05.05.02
You FOOLS!! Pirates? Ninjas? Mere amateurs, each and every one of them!!! You have NO IDEA what REALultimat power is! SUBMIT!!!!

 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
17:56 / 05.05.02
Seals?

Ugly Dogs?

Mutant babies?
 
 
Trijhaos
18:00 / 05.05.02
What is that? Seal? Dog? A strange hybrid of some sort?

Whatever it is, it is frightening....yet somehow cute at the same time. How can this be?
 
 
The Monkey
18:15 / 05.05.02
I can't decide if it's adorable...or an abomination. Perhaps both. But the real question is whether it could beat Pikachu.
 
 
Margin Walker
18:27 / 05.05.02
Whatever it is, it is frightening....yet somehow cute at the same time. How can this be?

Yesss.... Feel the cuteness FLOW inside your veins....

As you can see, you are beyond the point of "the turning". The Cuteness is taking over now, giving you a beatific smile while destroying you utterly. Resistance is futile.
 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
18:28 / 05.05.02
I know. It's a pavement seed. It will soon be picked up and carried to another place by someone who wants something to cuddle, and there it will put down roots and soon a new town will spring up.

Ah, the miracle of mutant nature.
 
 
Saint Keggers
02:11 / 06.05.02
It seems to be a seal. As a canadian I feel it is my job to pick up a heavy stick and club it to death for its fur. I am neither a pirate nor ninja but my clubbing skills are second to none. I AM club-fu incarnate!
 
 
that
05:45 / 06.05.02
That just gets weirder the more you look at it. It's got a bit of panda in it too, somewhere, so I don't think you better go clubbing it too soon, Kegboy. Plus, it'd look weird in sequins and high heels, and dogs have very sensitive hearing, at least one third of it wouldn't enjoy a club very much. What the fuck is it, Margin Walker?

No way could it beat Pikachu though, and it's not as cute. Pika! Chu!
 
 
MJ-12
14:19 / 06.05.02
But he is still white. And the scrolls will eventually have to reflect that.

I believe the proper heirarchy would be
9. non-Asians
8. Asians who are not Koreans
7. South Koreans
6. North Koreans from the cities instead of the countryside
5. North Koreans from the countryside but not from the Villiage of Sinanju
4. Those lazy people in Sinanju who live down by the docks
3. The rest of the village of Sinanju not related to the House of Chiun
2. The Pale Piece of Pig's Ear
1. The Incomparable Master Chiun

Ninjas and Pirates are only relevant according to how they fit into the above scale
 
 
Saint Keggers
22:44 / 06.05.02
Cholister: Part Panda maybe..but my koala can defeat the panda portion just as easily as a pirate can defeat a ninja, even a cool ninja; and by cool I mean totally sweet.


(What I did there was to take a section of the thread that had nothin to do with the actual thread topic and bring it back in line by intoducing an element from another thread which, though it too had nothing to do with the thread topic, was used in such a way to reference the original thread topic thus completing the circle of life)
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
12:21 / 17.05.02
*bump*

ARRRR!
 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
13:37 / 17.05.02
Hssssssss...

[skulks]

Hh...

[burrows]
 
 
rizla mission
13:40 / 17.05.02
Harr-har! That be figthin' talk! Not that I could make it out, but let's give him the benefit of the doubt. HAVE AT YOU!
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
23:56 / 17.05.02
Come OOONNN ye scurvy dogs... haveatcha... not so tough now, are yez, with yer sneakin and skulkin...
Gentlemen... let's make these ninjing bastards walk... THE PLANK!!!
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
13:07 / 18.05.02
*Hsssss*

Sneaks up and filps out with a NINJA SWORD!
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
13:36 / 18.05.02
Arrr!

*pours grøg on Mordant, who reduces and retreats.*
 
 
mondo a-go-go
12:55 / 20.05.02
where did the other pirate vs ninja thread go? did someone get all pissy and kill it because they knew that the pirates had the final, correct answer?
 
 
Margin Walker
19:01 / 20.05.02
Y'mean Nick's "What have pirates got to do with it?" thread?
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
10:20 / 21.05.02
It's been bumped, ye dogs.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
12:26 / 28.06.02
Bumped again, as it's germane. I still claim that pirates will beat that "ultimate power" bollocks due to their mad, salty skillz.

Ahem.

*burp*

*hornpipe*
 
 
Tuna Ghost: Pratt knot hero
19:18 / 28.06.02
I can't stop looking into the black soulless pits that are the eyes of that furry manatee.

I thought I was all pirate all the time (feel free to add "baby" to the previous sentence), but recently at work I've discovered the ability to be completely invisible to everyone. I carried a water pitcher around for an hour and a half yesterday, and no one, not even the general managers, even attempted to speak to me. This is incredibly useful, and definately a ninja trait.

...did that soulless abomination just move in it's picture? Someone get a revolver. It'll probably need some silver bullets or some shit.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
22:04 / 28.06.02


GROG: for scurvier pirates, and shinier sinks.
 
 
Puzimandias
22:14 / 28.06.02
Ninjas and pirates can both run and hide to make way for a new faction:

HIGHWAYMEN

Which is like being a pirate without scurvy, hard tack or plank walking.
And also like being a ninja without having to wear black or learn Japanese.

It also means you get to be your own boss without reporting to secret ninja masters or Caribbean governors.

Stand and deliver!
(or, if you like, just stay sitting down. It really makes little difference to me)
 
 
Saint Keggers
19:28 / 29.06.02
Pshaw! Highwaymen dont even enter into the arena of cooletudiness that are pirates vs ninja. They are like the school nerd who is stuck being mascott becasue he couldnt make the football team. They are non-issues.
(Incidently, while researching my geneology, it turned out that one person in it was hanged for being a highwayman...so I know what for I talk abouts!!)
 
 
Spatula Clarke
19:40 / 28.08.02
Got to admit that I've not read this thread through properly, but I've got to say that the 'hatemail' section of the official Ninja site is berrilliant.

You must be the stupidest piece of shit on this damn planet. You make a site about 'REAL NINJAS' because they are 'TOTALLY SWEET' when in fact you dont know bullshit about them, you make this shit up off of the top of your deformed head, and you even tell ppl damn screwed up lies. you call this shit factual? damnit you probably have no fuckin idea what a shuriken is. ninjas don't flip out. they dont play guitars. they dont use crap like lasers. you have no idea what a pirate is. go look it up in a fuckin book, i mean a REAL book. how the hell can you publish this sort of shit? ninjas CANT FLY. they CANT USE MAGIC. they dont kill whoever they want. they are really peasants trained to use stealth and to kill, using REAL weapons, such as shurikens, darts, etc. their targets were NOT pirates, they were usually important political or military figures, often they killed high ranking samurai and the like. go learn something REAL about REAL NINJAS, then you can publish that.

i hope you publish this on your damn site, and make as many comments as you can fuckin come up with. other ppl also know you are messed up. i'm not alone.

from anynomous


Hey you fuckin moron,


I just visited you fucked up little piece of shit ninja site, and you don't know Jack Shit about them do you? First off, how fuckin old are you, you little SOB, and how the FUCK long have you studied NINJAS? If you honestly believe in what you put on your site you should just do the world a fuckin favor and bend over, put your dick in your mouth and bite it the fuck off so that everyone knows the planet won't be tainted by someone else genetically related to a dumb fuck like you. I got a fuckin list of things that are wrong on your fuckin page. First off, your fuck off firend Mark said he saw an actual NINJA, do you fuckin know how many there really are, there are less than 50 real ones left, and only 5 live in the U.S.! NINJAS DON'T FLIP OUT YOU FUCKIN RETARD!!! do you even know what Ninjas WERE!!! They were SPIES and ASSASSINS, next time ask before you pull shit out your ass and put it on a page. EVERYTHING you said on your page is shit, even your equipment is WRONG. I bet you don't even fuckin know the differance between a katana and a zaoichito blade, and if you DON'T then remove your fuckin site right the fickin now. I'm sick and fuckin tired of people like you, who have a computer and THINK somehting is cool, and then put total BULLSHIT on the internet to confuse otehrs who are actually researching the True past of these excellant soldiers, you MOTHER FUCKING PEICE OF RAT SHIT. If you want some REAL info e-mail me and I'd be GLAD to set you straight, I've actually studied these fuckers for MORE THAN TWO WEEKS. HELL, I've even been to the last official Okinawan Dojo for them. But please get your fuckin bullshit site off the fuckin net or COMPLETELY reFUCKINGdo-it.


Sincerely,
A Guy Who Loves Asia And Knows About The Real Past Of Ninjas,

To: Some Kid Who Thought He Knew Something


And the reply? Genius!

Dear Stupid idiots,
A lot of you have been signing my guest book and saying that I don’t know anything about REAL ninjas. But that’s a bunch of bull crap! You dummies don’t know anything. And maybe YOU should get a life. I bet a lot of you have never even seen a girl naked! You idiots believe that ninjas had some “code of honor”, just because you read Ching Chong’s guide to ninjas and codes and stuff. Yeah right! You shouldn’t believe everything you read. If by “code of honor”, you mean “code to flip out and go nuts for absolutely no reason at all even if it means that people might think you are totally insane or sweet”, then you are right. But if you mean a "code to be nice and speak nicely while sharing and not cutting off heads", then you’re the biggest idiot ever!!!!!! So if you have any brains, you will shut up and get a life. So go shut up, you stupid idiot.

No thank you,
Robert

p.s.
you are dummies
 
  

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