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Misreadings

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STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

14:34 / 21.04.06

Funnily enough, I came to this thread to post about "What do you buy a baby?" as well. Only I keep reading it as "Where".

15:21 / 21.04.06

Mordant is misreading it too from the looks of it.

17:40 / 25.04.06

Mighty Age Old Squirrels, Maosquls, if you will, a bit like the common variety Mighty Squirrels or Mysquls, of the same genus, perhaps. (I worried for Barbelith lest these horrible beasts took it upon themselves to invade).

19:18 / 25.04.06

On the back of a van I read
"RABBITS
recycle here".

But was infact "RABBITS vehicle hire".
A slightly less eco-friendly version than my first reading.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

19:44 / 25.04.06

For some reason my "What do you buy a baby" misreading has mutated. Now I keep seeing "WHY do you buy a baby?"

Or maybe that's what I keep thinking when I misread it the original way.

miss wonderstarr

17:25 / 26.04.06

I was in a meeting today, the last agenda-item of which was "Attendance Chasing".

I read it repeatedly as "Ambulance Chasing".

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

17:28 / 26.04.06

"Ambulance chasing" at least makes more sense... "chasing" a concept like "attendance" seems doomed to failure. It's kind of like declaring war on "terrorism" or something...

oh, hang on.

paranoidwriter waves hello

23:15 / 27.04.06

Am I the only one who keeps reading this thread title as, "Throwing a sickle"? Yes? Well, at the very least, you gotta admit it's a novel way of dealing with bugs.

07:01 / 28.04.06

Continuing the thread titles theme:

"Battlestar Galactica Season 2 for Shy People"

Awwww, how sweet...

D'oh!

07:22 / 28.04.06

Paranoidwriter: I also read it as "Throwing a sickle" -- first thought was angry druids. Eeep.

Hydra vs Leviathan

17:36 / 03.05.06

I read the Excitement in the title of this thread as Excrement...

Hitler Beans

Could it have been Butter beans? Capital B, IME, when looked at quickly, can often look like capital H...

20:50 / 03.05.06

*claps hands*

Yes! That's gotta be it! Excellent, a 4 yr old case closed. Thanks, Natty.

12:07 / 10.05.06

My wife, an exceedingly prolific slash-writer*, just posted (on her Friends List) an invitation to her Lord of the Rings fanfic writer buddies to submit stories to her site:

CALLING ALL HOBBIT PENS!!

I... misread it rather badly.

*Frodo/Sam, Casey/Zeke (Faculty)

13:31 / 10.05.06

Damn my memory. There was some sort of mortgage or savings account offer on the window of a building society which I just can't remember. I do remember however that I misread it as "Hot Burglar", which won't give you much of a clue as to what the words actually were, as I also remember thinking at the time that Hot Burglar was nothing like the words I had misread.

14:12 / 10.05.06

"I got a new kind of cracker for the baby today," said Wifey.

"Ooh," I exclaimed. "What kind?"

"Um." (Wifey picks up the box and reads) "Venereal crackers*."

"What?"

"Ha ha! I said venereal crackers, didn't I?"

"Yes you did," says I, "And there's no way I'm feeding those to the baby!"

*They were vanilla crackers.

23:37 / 11.05.06

I was walking past a newspaper stand that were selling some old second-hand books, one of which had the following title:

"100 Ways to Get Rich"

except I read:

"100 Ways to Get Crazy"

which I thought was somewhat ironic

Hydra vs Leviathan

10:42 / 14.05.06

I'm guessing that's a translation of what it said, rather than English (you're in Brazil, right)?

Here's an odd one: in the "family" section of yesterday's Guardian, there was a quote under a photo (I think of a family going to the World Cup) that said "It's all about the atmosphere".

Which i read as It's all about the stepmother"...

13:48 / 14.05.06

I'm guessing that's a translation of what it said, rather than English (you're in Brazil, right)?

Yes, I am. And yes, it is.

The actual words were, respectively:

"100 maneiras de enriquecer"

and

"100 maneiras de enlouquecer"

which actually makes the misreading more likely to happen (note the similarity between the words)

Whisky Priestess

08:25 / 16.05.06

Top of this forum right now:

How would YOU butter the cosmos?

I do like a challenge.

Hydra vs Leviathan

18:58 / 18.05.06

The place i'm working at at the moment has coffee machines made by a company called Sabre Vending Limited (with a big logo of a crudely drawn, rather pissed-off looking sabre-toothed tiger). However, today i read the text on one of the boxes of "In Cup Coffee" that the machine is filled with as Severe Vomiting Ltd...

Also, not quite sure if this counts as a misreading as such, or just a very oddly worded tabloid headline, but on the cover of one of the tabloid papers lying around in the canteen the other day (probably either the Sun or the Daily Star), there was a half-naked picture of some woman called Eva something-or-other, with the headline "Eva longed for a hot body like this?"

Which made me think 2 things:

1) Who is Eva, and why did she long for a "hot body like this"? And if this story is just about some woman's unfulfilled desire for a better body, isn't the inclusion of a picture of a "hot body like this" totally gratuitous?

2) Oh, it's a question. No, i'm reasonably happy with this male body, actually...

and it took me quite a while to realise that the rhetorical question was actually meant to imply longing to "have" Eva ('s body) as a sex partner/object, rather than to "be" someone with a body like Eva's... freaked me out a little, if only because it reminded me just how alien the tabloid body-objectification thing is from my own thought processes...

Hydra vs Leviathan

15:03 / 21.05.06

obvious one, but i wonder how many other people have missed the "e" in the title of this thread?

21:14 / 23.05.06

This is completely resultant of sleep deprivation but I just misread the fiction suit "Display name: LOL" as "Our Distained Porcelain Pope" and thought nice new named Lady.

I like Our Easily Distracted- too btw.

22:23 / 31.05.06

Just flicking through the tv schedules during the ad break on Big Brother and found that one of the minor, minor, toty wee channels was showing a programme called HomoGoblin. Was intrigued by the thought of a Rossetti-esque documentary about short, ugly gay men until I realised my mistake and turned off the boring documentary about hemoglobin [sic].

Less searchable M0rd4nt

12:39 / 01.06.06

The word for the bit of a library where the newspapers and stuff are kept is hemeroteca. Never fails to make my head whip round (and think of Deva).

13:08 / 01.06.06

Barbeplugs= Barbedbuttplugs to my eyes as I skipped through the Convo today. Ouchy.
(Mordant, I misread that as Henerotica, heh! As opposed to Cockerotica I suppose? Bad Quantum eyes today..)

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

13:15 / 01.06.06

Bought some peanuts yesterday with a World Cup promotion, offering "Wrighty Megaphones". But it was a small packet, so the lettering was small. "They're giving away DIRTY MAGAZINES with peanuts? WTF is the world coming to?" I thought.

unheimlich manoeuvre

12:31 / 02.06.06

Condoleezza Rice in the Independent 16th May discussing her favourite bands.

Cream - Eric Clapton, Ginger Baker and Jack Bruce - were one of the first of the great supergroups. Despite the fact that the band split up in 1968, Cream's fans are still going strong. "I love to work out to this song," says Rice. "Believe it or not, I loved acid in college - and I still do."

It explained so much. Then I realised it said acid rock.

Hydra vs Leviathan

16:58 / 04.06.06

I passed a church while opn a bus recently that had a sign outside saying Infernal Morning Service...

Probably actually Informal...

21:39 / 04.06.06

Bonds named after their members' given names..?

But... Bond is always called James Bond... and it's one guy; no members...

Oh...

Eight arms, two hearts

22:02 / 04.06.06

A few weeks ago, misread this headline in the daily BBC news email as 'Musharraf "pot noodle" of the US' and spent some time wondering who might have called him this, and whether they maybe meant he was some kind of trashy guilty pleasure we indulged in secret.

22:38 / 04.06.06

Being very tired yesterday, I thought my anti-acne cream was called Yggdrasil, and thought to myself that it was an odd but very interesting name for such a product and went on to ponder the possible connections between acne and Norse mythology.

It was only after I'd gone to bed that it occured to me that I use Clearasil.

13:07 / 05.06.06

Barbelith was just down, and amongst the error messages that flash up I'm sure it said "MyTemporarySquirrelSocks" slash colon etc.
Those squirrelly bastards are invading our software now!

14:21 / 05.06.06

Warning: mysql_selectdb(): supplied argument is not a valid MySQL-Link resource

The TechnoSquirrels disagree with my argument. Is that a squirrelly emoticon in the middle there? - ():

16:11 / 05.06.06

I misread the name of our newest member (currybet) as - I'm really sorry - currybutt, and spent the next few seconds idly wondering if curry was such a particularly fattening food as all that.

17:04 / 05.06.06

here's the bit I misread- '/tmp/mysql.sock' (2)

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