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Romantic workplace faux pas

 
  

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illmatic
14:08 / 05.07.06
Haus: We'll all go blind. Together.
 
 
Sax
14:24 / 05.07.06
You will if you keep looking at that photo of the muscly bloke with the tyres.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
14:30 / 05.07.06
So, something more like:





?
 
 
The resistable rise of Reidcourchie
14:52 / 05.07.06
"Dude, I would so not go out with someone who planned on turning into a squid in 5 years time. NO WAY!"

Weirdo.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
15:10 / 05.07.06
Well, I'm here at work and he's intent on acting goofy around me today.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
15:12 / 05.07.06
Like a Discordian? I'm telling you: kneecaps.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
15:17 / 05.07.06
Well, there are a large number of heavy objects in the garage. But wouldn't kneecapping him out of nowhere be a bad thing?
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:19 / 05.07.06
Well, depends where you're coming from. it would make him a lot less goofy very quickly.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
15:23 / 05.07.06
Yeah, a heavy object to the kneecaps does say, "Oi, fucker, quit it."

But so far, so good.
 
 
Slim
15:47 / 05.07.06
Haus seems exceptionally goofy today as well.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
15:54 / 05.07.06
Don't tell anyone, but I spent last night with:




I'm head over heels.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
16:01 / 05.07.06
Note to self:

Even you have made the firm resolution not to touch, kiss, date, or allow him to see you in any form of undress, it might also help if you would stop imagining what you would like him to do to you in Oakland Cemetary in the dead of night.

Eyes on your monitor, Kali, and nowhere else.
 
 
Ticker
16:21 / 05.07.06
it might also help if you would stop imagining what you would like him to do to you in Oakland Cemetary in the dead of night.

iffin' you've got that sort of thing in yer head Ma'am, yer better off planning how to do this with conscious actions to reduce the badness. Be proactive with yer lust rather than be at its mercy. Looking at it out of the corner of your eye just makes it loom larger than if you look at it square on.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
16:27 / 05.07.06
This spookily parallel romance of mine may help to distract you:



We drank red wine and listened to the Lost Boys OST. It was... magical.

I could have danced all night, I could have danced all night...

Sorry, try again.

Cryyyyyyy, little sister.....
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
16:30 / 05.07.06
It's times like this I wish I would rescind that whole "don't sleep with your friends" credo I stand by.

I wish I had a friend who could scratch the itch instead.

Anyway, it's like: "Hi, I know that we've already kissed and you claim to be seeing someone, but would you mind taking a field trip to the cemetary? And don't forget to bring condoms."

That would go over like a lead balloon.

Honestly, sleeping with him wouldn't solve the problem. It would just feed the fire.

Haus, get your tools and let's get to work on removing what makes me so pathetically a slave to lust.
 
 
Ticker
16:39 / 05.07.06
Kali
If it was just lust you were hooked on you might have a chance....
..but it's most likely the entire brain cocktail of nu-luv possibility.

Haus
Just becareful of listening to that musik, you might ass-dently summon a Corey. Which would blow the whole romantic mood me thinks.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
16:45 / 05.07.06
Dude, have you seen my honey? He could take Coreys Haim and Feldman together. And beat them in a fight.

And as for new-luv possibility - this is the least promising setup for romance ever. Even if we leave aside for the moment the very real risk that this man has some kind of beard, he's seeing someone else, has a rather relaxed approach to honesty and might well have some kind of beard. And is a coworker, but never mind that.

I call darker purpose. Kali, have you recently had any significant anniversaries? Had any life changes? Any important people fallen out of or gotten in touch?
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
16:56 / 05.07.06
Go to the cemetery NOW. ALONE. Do something really "not on", like vandalising a headstone, or calling the head groundsman a wanker or something.

In short, get yourself banned from the place. It'll be for the best in the long run, I swear.
 
 
Ticker
16:56 / 05.07.06
Dude, he so could but do you want the moment to be ruined? Though
I suppose he'd be all sweatatstic after all that ass kicking and you'd get to swoon.
Wait, he's not Angel to your Buffy is he? Hanging about in boneyards and being broody?
'red wine' and Lost Boys? Oh Haus....


You can call a darker porpoise? What's Kali going to do with a black sea mammal that she can't do with her geeky mechanic? Wait...I may not want to know the answer to that...
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
17:57 / 05.07.06
They use them like fingers, you know.
 
 
Ticker
18:12 / 05.07.06
the Coreys are used like fingers? EEEWWW!
 
 
Dead Megatron
18:32 / 05.07.06
As Haus can surely confirm, people with decepticon tattoos are the best lovers evah!!

Except for Doctor Who-loving five-dimension blind squids with decepticon tattoos, of course.

In the mean time, Kali, was there any new developments in this romantic tragedy, real world-wise?
 
 
Evil Scientist
19:08 / 05.07.06
This is a romantic advice thread. It's on page four. No-one has said anything requiring a sideways trip to any 101 or Policy threads.

WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH BARBELITH?
 
 
Tryphena Absent
19:21 / 05.07.06
I've had sexy office flings

Oh yeah, everyone's having sexy fun in the stationary cupboard except me. Honestly, what's the point of working if there's no danger involved? Why don't we all just lie down and die now. Why bother waiting for the squid tentacles to burst out of our ears thus rupturing our brains? Hmmm?
 
 
Dead Megatron
19:28 / 05.07.06
I wish I had a fling with a sexy office...
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
19:31 / 05.07.06
DOWN, boy!
 
 
rising and revolving
19:42 / 05.07.06
Evil Sci : What has happened to Barbelith? If the photoshopping in this thread is any indication, it's turned into Fark. Which truly is the anti-lith.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
22:34 / 05.07.06
No-one has said anything requiring a sideways trip to any 101 or Policy threads.

I think all the winky squirty is currently being spilled over stabbystabby's Australian brothel dilemma.

They use them like fingers, you know.
 
 
stabbystabby
00:28 / 06.07.06
farkelith!
 
 
The resistable rise of Reidcourchie
07:21 / 06.07.06
"the Coreys are used like fingers? EEEWWW!"

Everyone knows they're used like slippers...oh hold on. Besides both the Coreys together could kick a cyberman's arse regardless of the amount of time it had spent inf graveyards preparing (Haus is some kind of cyberman physical fitness trainer, right?). It's in the next episode of Dr. Who, just wait and see.

"Oh yeah, everyone's having sexy fun in the stationary cupboard except me. Honestly, what's the point of working if there's no danger involved? Why don't we all just lie down and die now. Why bother waiting for the squid tentacles to burst out of our ears thus rupturing our brains? Hmmm?"

I would hate to think of you not looking forward to having tentacles in your head, you're more than welcome to come over to my office for an affair, of course I work from home and I'll have to clear some pots of old paint and the blue monkey out of my cupboard before it can be put to any kind of use.

"It's times like this I wish I would rescind that whole "don't sleep with your friends" credo I stand by."

Do you only sleep with mortal enemies? A bit like Superman sleeping with Darkseid?

Actaully wasn't something supposed to have happened or not last night, I seem to remember that earlier in this thread I was looking forwards to Thursday.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
08:02 / 06.07.06
Actaully wasn't something supposed to have happened or not last night?

Superman and Darkseid totally went to the Peach Pit together.
 
 
The resistable rise of Reidcourchie
08:18 / 06.07.06
The peach pit?
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
08:21 / 06.07.06
Probably before your time.
 
 
The resistable rise of Reidcourchie
08:27 / 06.07.06
No, actaually my time, I remember the show, it use to make me shout at the TV, thankfully I've wiped some of the details from my memory.
 
 
Dead Megatron
12:33 / 06.07.06
References to Beverly Hills 90210 should be grounds for banning...

But I digress.
 
  

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