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Writers' Helpdesk, how may we be of service?

 
  

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Crestmere
00:56 / 05.01.07
Thanks for the prompts guys.

The underground idea is pretty cool. I'll let it roll around for a bit.

The second idea is awesome.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
15:47 / 10.01.07
Yes! Write it, do.!

What would our hero's name be though? I'm not sure Captain Tube has the right, you know ... oomph. MetroMan? The Subway Soldier?
 
 
Ticker
13:51 / 03.02.07
hullo WHD!!

So after a while of having people read my stuff and say either they love it or hate but not a lot of specific 'here is how to improve it', I finally landed a stunt reader who is also a pro editor.

So far it's a lot like handing in something you think you'll get a B on and getting back a piece of paper covered in red pencil and you don't even dare look in the upper left hand corner for the grade. Mind you this is after I had another pro editor help me get rid of the really bad stuff.


At first I had this gut punch overwhelmed reaction thinking of all the rewriting I have to do. Now I feel this immense sense of being saved from self publishing too soon and having crap preserved in amber.

Do other people have experience with editors? If so sould you wheel them out for me as this is very different from what I'm used to.
 
 
matthew.
00:48 / 04.02.07
I'm really interested in becoming an editor now (more than being a writer. I've realized slowly that I'm ultimately a reader). So I'm also really interested in people's dealings with editors.
 
 
--
02:53 / 04.02.07
Hey, there's nothing wrong with self-publishing, despite the stigma it seems to have gotten over the years. I self-published my first book through iUniverse, and it was a pleasurable experience. Granted, it won't be in bookstores near you and it won't get me much money at all, but it was more practice than anything else. Kind of like Sam Raimi doing an indie film to convince people to give him money to do "Evil Dead" or something like that. I think self-publishing can be good if you have a product that you know just wouldn't be commercial, but you still want it out there for interested parties (I also like how it gives the artist almost complete creative control.) I'm not saying I want all my books to be self-published, but it can be a good start and a way to slowly get your name out there.
 
 
Alex's Grandma
09:29 / 04.02.07
I'm really interested in becoming an editor now (more than being a writer. I've realized slowly that I'm ultimately a reader). So I'm also really interested in people's dealings with editors.

If you're talking about finding a job as a literary editor, it might be an idea to see about getting into the agent racket instead. Generally speaking, it's like being a private detective as opposed to a policeman - there's an element of risk involved if you're an agent, in that about half of the writers you sign up are going to get published, and the others will have to go back to the drawing board, but you do get to work with them directly, in a way that I'm guessing you wouldn't as an editor at a publishing house that pays a living wage, these days. In the UK anyway, it seems as if most of the editing happens before the book's submitted. So, if you dismiss your agent as having the soul of a hog, say, it's a fair bet that you won't see print in the immediate future.

That said, I've got no idea what editors actually do now, except perhaps worry about being sacked.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
08:51 / 04.04.07
Just bumping to puff the very first ever Liars' League on Tuesday 10th April - that's next Tuesday - upstairs at the Lamb pub in Bloomsbury.

It will be fun, do come. Only £2 on the door.

Also, entries are trickling in for readings in subsequent months, but we need as much high-quality short fiction as we can get, so please do submit. Top whack is 2000 words (2500 if it's very, very good). Upcoming themes are:

May - Mad & Bad
June - Past & Future
July - Sex & Death
 
 
Psych Safeling
14:53 / 04.04.07
Please tell me that the author of Sexy Party is aware of post-bleed Hawksmoor?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
15:40 / 04.04.07
Eh? Who?

Tell me and I will pass it on, if you like - do you recognise the name? Or is it a rip off? (Hard to tell from a paragraph though ...)
 
 
Psych Safeling
08:42 / 05.04.07
Recognise the name, that's all! No accusations of plagiarism whatsoever
 
 
Whisky Priestess
10:40 / 05.04.07
Aha ... no, I think the Sexy Party meme is more widespread than here - in fact, given that the instigator of the Sexy Parties in the story is called Stuart, I rather suspect that the author has been watching too much Family Guy ...

Stewie's Sexy Party
 
 
Psych Safeling
19:48 / 11.04.07
Gotcha. How did the event go? I'm nervously working on my effort for Sex and Death.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
21:30 / 11.04.07
I'm glad you asked me that, Psych. It went REALLY WELL. Lots of people turned up (but not too many, just enough that it was comfortably packed), it all went off smoothly with no explosions or deaths, actors emoted, audience laughed, strong men wept etc.

I can't wait for the next one, really. Hopefully I'll take a bit more of a backseat and get to spend the entire evening just hanging out with my mates rather than only half. But we've had some ace submissions already (IMHO) and we've still got a week and a half to go before the deadline (Friday April 20).

Although I will say that so far most of our submissions have been from male writers (about 80%) so if any female Barbefolk like yourself want to even the odds a bit that would be great. This is more a case of having more female actors to use at the moment than blokes - so male writers with female narrators would also work well for us (or anything in the third person).

But as always, quality is the only criterion. Submit!
 
 
Whisky Priestess
21:31 / 11.04.07
To clarify - deadline for May (Mad & Bad) is April 20. Deadline for Sex and Death is end of Juneish.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
12:35 / 16.04.07
I want to put out some more calls for submissions for Liars' League - can anyone give me the URLs of websites they regularly use?

I've tried writernet but it's really for script stuff, and there's already a call for subs on Pulp.Net

International English-language sites (Australia, NZ, US) also welcome.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
10:05 / 17.04.07
*bump*

any writers use any internet sites at all, apart from barbelith?
 
 
astrojax69
09:42 / 18.04.07
are there other sites on the internet???

(avoid 'helium', a crap american site that seems like a banal sort of un-barb'ed everyone on lithium sort of place)
 
 
Whisky Priestess
12:40 / 10.05.07
I never thought I'd say this, but I wish I'd picked up the Daily Mail a few months ago (although the novel competition is still on):

Get published, win £30k, the end.
 
 
Happy Dave Has Left
13:55 / 23.05.07
So me and XK were chatting over email, and I mentioned a brilliant bit of literary freeware I've been using since I was in my teens. Although it's focused mainly on the science fictional end of the writing scale, there's a lot of excellent more broadly applicable stuff in Bruce Sterling's Workshop Lexicon.

Lemme know if you get any use from it.
 
 
Ticker
15:12 / 23.05.07
It's pretty fantastic and really does help quickly express what the problematic areas of a work are.

I <3 7's for sharing it.
 
 
This Sunday
15:19 / 23.05.07
I was just looking for something to pass on to people having trouble applying their 'realist' preferences to critiquing (or even holding workshops containing) speculative fiction that wasn't going to handwave it away as okeh to be bad writing because it's sf.

Thanks, 7's.
 
 
Happy Dave Has Left
17:17 / 23.05.07
Sweet, glad to be of assistance!
 
 
Whisky Priestess
11:35 / 01.06.07
All righty writers:

On June 26th, Liars' League is holding a special super never-to-be-repeated event to celebrate/mourn the UK smoking ban which comes into effect on July 1.

We are looking for short stories (or extracts of novels that can stand alone) between 800-2000 words (up to 2500 if it is REALLY REALLY good) on the theme of CIGARETTES & ALCOHOL. The stories don't have to be about both, but one or the other should feature significantly in order to keep the story on-topic.

Please email your fantastic work to liarsleague@hotmail.com by 11.59pm next Friday 8th June. Any questions, stick them here!
 
 
Alex's Grandma
09:54 / 02.06.07
(WP in Granny's clothing)

Shit. Sorry, that should be liarsleague@yahoo.co.uk

Please send your stories to the Yahoo account. The hotmail one doesn't exist, unfortunately. Not that I'm aware of, anyway.
 
 
Phex: Dorset Doom
16:29 / 13.06.07
Two things: one's a promotion, t'other's a boast.

Let's start with the boast shall we?
I got into the University of East Anglia's Creative Writing MA. That, as some of you might know, is a big deal. Big enough, for instance, to make me shout 'FUCK YEAH!' louder than a gunshot played through Dinosaur Jnr's speaker setup and do a little dance I have since entitled 'Untitled Celebration (with boo-tay shakin')' when I read the letter telling me that I got in. It's a deferred entry for 2008, so I've got over a year to prepare

And the promotion? Well, in my final year of studies at UEA, some friends and I put together the first ever undergraduate writing anthology that has ever been attempted at the university, and it went down great. The final book looks as good as anything else on the shelves- thanks in no small part to the InDesign awesomeness of yours truly- and is being sold all over Norwich and soon online (The Website should be up and running soon, but is down atm).

Feel free to heap props upon me.
 
 
Happy Dave Has Left
09:39 / 14.06.07
Props dude. I have a feeling Whisky Priestess went to UEA - amirite WP?
 
 
Whisky Priestess
23:12 / 15.06.07
Darn tootin'. Had a great time, too. Big congratulations to you, son!

And I'm getting a 404 on that link, alas.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
19:29 / 01.07.07
Just thought I'd bump the thread to big up the next Liars' League event, which is on Tuesday 10th July and is themed around Sex & Death. There are some teaser first paras for the stories we're going to read on the blog here.

Also, we still need fiction of 800-2000 words (2500 if BRILLIANT) for the August event, theme Home & Abroad. Send 'em if you've got 'em to liarsleague@yahoo.co.uk
 
 
Alex's Grandma
20:35 / 01.07.07
My play isn't doing very well.

It was considered "totally unsuitable" by the powers-that-be at the Chelsea Arts Festival, and has just been rejected by the Royal Court, who felt that "there's scope to strengthen the narrative progessions through a series of precise dramatic interactions." I'm not entirely sure what that means, but they're probably right.

Unless, that is, what I got was a form rejection letter, which would be quite bad. Has anyone else had their stuff turned down by this lot, and if so, how did they phrase it?
 
 
Hallo, Paper Spaceboy
23:41 / 15.08.07
As some of the lateshifters are aware, I'm in the middle of writing a piece of detective fiction; I've just finished the first, very rough, draft. I'm starting up the second draft. I've never written a mystery story or any kind of detective fiction before, so I'm wondering about people's experiences with it, or even from the standpoint of readers. Do you prefer the "fair play" stories where the reader can figure it out from the information given? The Columbo-style "open" mysteries, where the crime is shown in full detail and what follows is more about psychological dancing? "Closed" mysteries where the detective pulls the solution from the air?

I'm finding the process is a lot more layered than usual - I'm having to approach the drafts with more of an intent to add specific elements and layers with each pass, starting with the barebones plot of the thing, the mechanics of the crime itself...

Would you subordinate character work to plot? How ridiculous you can be without straining credibility?
 
 
This Sunday
00:08 / 16.08.07
I'm impartial to whether the mystery is solvable by the reader or not, and more concerned with the mystery being there to service the plot and characters, rather than the reverse. Some fine mysteries have been done where the characters would very much like to stop digging (Chinatown; Angel Heart), where the mystery is nearly forgotten or becomes tangential to the work (Long Goodbye; Dirk Gently), or the Columbo/Ninth Gate method where you know pretty much from moment one what went on, and it's all cat'n'mousing from there. So there's certainly room to negotiate some space for your story in virtually any territory you choose.

Having the benefit of seeing bits of parts of drafts of this, my suggestion would be, rather than guess at an audience, just wing it. Do what seems witty and appropriate at the time.
 
 
Spaniel
09:29 / 16.08.07
I absolutely hate closed mysteries. At least I'm pretty sure I think I do, in that I can't think of an example where the solution hasn't collided with the actual plot and produced a dull-as-all-hell, exposition heavy, often arbitrary, bore-fest. I suppose it could, and probably has, worked as comedy

But on the whole, not to go that route.
 
 
Hallo, Paper Spaceboy
15:34 / 16.08.07
Yeah, "closed" mystery option wasn't really in the cards, but I was curious about it. This isn't really a genre that I've worked with much at all. I'm moving in the direction of having a combination of the other two -- you see the crime but there's more to it than initially appears.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
10:13 / 03.09.07
This in my inbox (matron!) - shonky formatting their own ...

introducing the first annual troubadour poetry prize


judged by: helen dunmore & david constantine


1st prize £1000, 2nd £500, 3rd £250

plus 20 commendations @ £20 each

and a coffee-house poetry reading for all prizewinning and commended poets with helen dunmore & david constantine
on 3rd december 2007

deadline: 30th september 2007

judges
Helen Dunmore is a poet, novelist and children’s writer. Her poetry books have been given the Poetry Book Society Choice and Recommendations, Cardiff International Poetry Prize, Alice Hunt Bartlett Award and Signal Poetry Award, and Bestiary was shortlisted for the T.S. Eliot Prize. Her latest titles are Out of the Blue: Poems 1975-2001 and Glad of These Times (Bloodaxe, 2007). She has published nine novels and three books of short stories with Viking Penguin. She lives in Bristol.

David Constantine is a freelance writer and translator, and a Fellow of Queen’s College, Oxford. His Bloodaxe poetry books include Caspar Hauser (1994), The Pelt of Wasps (1998), Something for the Ghosts (2002) and Collected Poems (2004). His Selected Poems of Hölderlin (1996), was winner of the European Poetry Translation Prize and he has translated Hölderlin’s Sophocles, Hans Magnus Enzensberger’s Lighter Than Air (Bloodaxe, 2002) and Goethe’s Faust (Penguin Classics, 2005).

Both judges will read all poems submitted.

rules
General: entry implies acceptance of all rules; failure to comply with rules may result in disqualification; competition open to poets of any nationality over 18 years; no competitor may win more than one prize; the judges’ decision is final; no individual correspondence can be entered into; poems must be in English, must each be no longer than 45 lines but with no limit on number of poems submitted, must be the original work of the entrant, must not have been previously broadcast or published (in print or on website).

Fees: All entries must be accompanied by correct fee of either £5/Euro7 per poem if less than 4 poems submitted, or £4/Euro5 per poem if 4 or more poems submitted, payable by cheque or money order (Sterling or Euro only).

By Post: no entry form required; poems must each be typed on one side of A4 white paper showing title & poem only; do not show author’s name or any other identifying marks on submitted poems; include a separate page showing Name, Address, Phone, E-Mail (opt), Titles and either No. of Poems @ £5/€7 OR No. of Poems @ £4/€5; entries are not returned.

By E-mail: no entry form required; poems must be submitted in body of e-mail (no attachments) to CoffPoetry@aol.com; entries should be preceded by Name, Address, Phone, Titles and either No. of Poems @ £5/Euro7 OR No. of Poems @ £4/€5; acknowledgement will be sent to entrant’s e-mail address showing Entry Acknowledgment Reference; send payment by post quoting Entry Acknowledgement Reference; e-mail entries will be included only when payment received. Cheques payable to Coffee-House poetry.

Acknowledgement/Results: will be sent automatically to all e-mail entrants; postal entrants should include stamped, addressed postcard marked “Acknowledgement” and/or stamped, addressed A5 envelope marked “Results” as required.

Deadline: All postal entries, and postal payments for e-mail entries, to arrive at Troubadour Poetry Prize, Coffee-House Poetry, PO Box 16210, LONDON, W4 1ZP on or before 30th September 2007. Prizewinners will be notified by 14th November 2007. Prizegiving will be on Monday 3rd December 2007 at Coffee-House Poetry at the Troubadour.

Anne-Marie Fyfe (Organiser)
coffee-house poetry at the troubadour

… life, literature and the pursuit of happiness… in the famous Troubadour basement:
London's liveliest & best-loved poetry venue…

readings MONDAYS from 8 to 10 pm, tickets £6 concessions £5,
season tickets 30% off…
cheques payable to Coffee-House Poetry, no credit cards

265 Old Brompton Road LONDON SW5
(no mail to this address, see correspondence address below)
nr. junct. Earls Court Rd & Old Brompton Rd (nearest Tube station: Earls Court (District & Piccadilly Lines) for information, advance booking, season ticket & mailing list enquiries, phone 020-8354 0660, write to Anne-Marie Fyfe at Coffee-House Poetry, PO Box 16210, LONDON, W4 1ZP or e-mail: CoffPoetry@aol.com
supported by Arts Council England
 
 
Whisky Priestess
14:44 / 05.09.07
I wrote a story ages ago, sent it out a few times and then gave up on it. A month or two back, the editor of Pulp.net emailed me, said she remembered it (from three or four years ago!) and would like to use it in the next issue. And hey presto - here it is ...

(Also, I get paid.)
 
  

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