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The countdown has begun. (PICS)

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ONLY NICE THINGS

05:48 / 19.05.05

Your blood turns to water...you die.

Well, yes, but not in a way of much use to a _vampire_, which I think is the confusion. It would seem to be rather shooting oneself in the foot as a super-strong, super-powerful vampire to kill people by removing from them every hint of the one substance that maintains your unnatural life.

08:18 / 19.05.05

Unless you are fighting another vampire, then it would hurt ...usually send them to torpor. (...jesus..i can'tbelieve ihave to explainthis shit.) Wow it's the 25th of that great day when the U.S.A showed the japanese how to die instantly...hoorah three cheers for nuclear horror. Yea yea yeah. Feel the dark side of the force? I do.

ONLY NICE THINGS

08:43 / 19.05.05

The 25th .... anniversary? You believe that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were bombed in 1980? This is confusing.

So, this vampire has the power to turn blood to water, which will send another vampire into "torpor"? So far so good: turning all the blood in one's body to water can therefore join decapitation and a stake through the heart as practical methods for dealing with vampires and humans pretty much equally effectively.

However. If the vampire had the power to turn water into blood, then a) s/he wouldn't get into fights _anyway_, because able to live peacefully and b) s/he would have access to so much of the precious "vitae" that s/he would be able to use his or her "aspects" so much that no opponent would stand a chance anyway. So, playing by Vampire: the Masquerade rules, water-to-blood remains a far more practical ability. "Blood-to-water" is at best highly specific and at worst utterly self-defeating. Might save on laundry, though...

The sad thing is, the plight of the polar bear is a sad one, and we should all be trying to find ways to preserve our environment, but then the vampires come in and it all goes a bit Tracer Tong.

09:11 / 19.05.05

Wow ...it was longer then that.(Jesusfuckingchristmakeitstopthepettyrottingmustend).

So how many years was it again? oh yes...2005 minus 1945 equals, wait let me get my calcul;atormachine and figure it out.. were we talking about vampires again...shit. I really wish someone could stay on topic without some sort of foolish inside smug insult confusing my head and making it hurt..too much to ask on this "edgy" board now isn't it. And now my half brain doesn't work again and I unfortunately can't read a digital thingy and the buttons are to strange for my poor little mind.
Blood...water aahhh yess it was ...wait one more minute...60 years ago.. Is that right? Please tell me I couldn't possibly know.

09:14 / 19.05.05

Genesh is right, rotting my thread is so much better.
Now go to bed.

ONLY NICE THINGS

09:29 / 19.05.05

Remember 1980? Remember Spangles? Remember Pacer Mints? Remember the atomic death raining down on Japan? Remember Tubeway Army?

The Switchboard is for discussing current events, Morph. You seem largely unable to distinguish between current events, prophetic dreams, Vampire: the Masquerade, apocalyptic ramblings and the rest of the Greenland Posse playbook. This thread started with a comical inability to distinguish between the fillibuster all-out global thermonuclear war. When yoou were reassured that the US wasnot actually debating whether or not to unleash Hell, you got all huffy, because you would actually rather the world ended in a torrent of nuclear than that you had to admit you were wrong.

I'm going to move for this to go to the Conversation, where it belongs.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

09:47 / 19.05.05

Now that this thread has found its proper forum, we can get to the really important question: Who would win a fight out of a polar bear and the Queen (if the Queen was in shape-shifting cannibal lizard form?)

09:56 / 19.05.05

Um, has anyone checked to see whether Morpheus and Quimper are one and the same person?

09:57 / 19.05.05

Is it the polar bear from the Fox's Glacier Mints ads, circa 1980?

Less searchable M0rd4nt

09:58 / 19.05.05

I hope for the sake of humanity they're the same person. I mean, two of 'em..?

Less searchable M0rd4nt

09:59 / 19.05.05

No, just a regular polar bear.

10:03 / 19.05.05

Depends where the fight took place. If on the polar bear's home turf, the Queen, being reptilian an' all, would likely drop her temperature to the extent that she entered torpor (like a diluted Vampire: The Masquerade combatant in a melee situation) and be ripped apart. If the fight took place in more temperate climes (or, indeed, in an aquatic setting), she might more easily gain the upper hand.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

10:05 / 19.05.05

Let's say the fight takes place on the Isle of Wight, then, but in about October. And the polar bear is ghouled to a Tremere.

10:08 / 19.05.05

Steven Wells answers all your inter-species fight-related questions in this Guardian piece.

No Polar Bear vs transmogrified Queen, but he does wonder about the Queen vs a T-Rex.

10:16 / 19.05.05

Is this the way to Camarilla?

ONLY NICE THINGS

10:26 / 19.05.05

Either you're on a steep learning curve, Ganesh, or you're dumped.

14:52 / 19.05.05

Wait, hang on, I think Haus is confused and I just want to straighten this out.

Wow it's the 25th of that great day when the U.S.A showed the japanese how to die instantly... - Morpheus

The 25th .... anniversary? You believe that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were bombed in 1980? This is confusing. - Haus

No, no, no. In 1980 the CIA shared top secret information with the Japanese Government about how to turn one's own blood into water, thus dying instantly. Not many people know about Operation Reversed Jesus, because there was a huge conspiracy to cover it up. But I can show you a website with all the secret documents online.

ONLY NICE THINGS

15:40 / 19.05.05

Wai Says "War! Hide Yourselves!"

It must be said that, when up against a human being with the ability to turn all its blood into water, a vampire with the ability to turn blood into water suddenly seems phenomenally useful. If, for example, one were caught in an Alive/Survivor/Hostage-style situ, the vampire could continue to provide water from the pulpy messes of the dead for weeks, whereas Reverse Jesus boy would be able to offer only one heroic, non-staining but ultimately rather limited waterskin.

Our Lady Has Left the Building

15:43 / 19.05.05

There may be a way to settle the massive confusion being thrown up in this thread. Morpheus, what do you think of Grant Morrison's comic Seaguy?

Less searchable M0rd4nt

15:45 / 19.05.05

Okay, so what if the Queen could do the reverse-jesus thing, right, but only for 1d6+1 turns after which all the water would turn back, and the polar bear could temporarily phase out of reality so it wouldn't need blood anyway?

15:54 / 19.05.05

So what, it goes to a reality where blood is not required? Simply acknowledging the existence of this reality raises scads of new questions that make this conversation open up like a beautiful flower or a bundle of greasy paper filled with squished chips.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

15:57 / 19.05.05

Well, maybe not a reality. Maybe the polar bear can go into mist form.

16:10 / 19.05.05

A mist of water? or a mist of blood?

Cos, you know, there are more conventional means (i.e., high explosives) to convert a polar bear to a mist of blood.

Bit messy reassembling it, though...

16:12 / 19.05.05

Is Mist Form a Tremere power? Surely it'd depend on the level of the Elder who'd ghouled the bear?

16:15 / 19.05.05

Vegetarian vampires have been known to exist for years on raw water with a dash of Ribena.

16:16 / 19.05.05

Muh...

I think I failed my saving throw vs. confusion.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

16:16 / 19.05.05

Maybe the Tremere learnt it off of some mist-form-having-guy. Look, there's LOADS of ways a polar bear could have Mist Form, I don't see why I should do ALL the work here.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

16:17 / 19.05.05

raw water

As opposed to cooked water?

18:57 / 19.05.05

Why a Tremere to begin with? Wouldn't a Gangrel be more likely to ghoul a bear?

18:59 / 19.05.05

Cooked water=steam.

19:00 / 19.05.05

They cook water where you are? Namby pamby Barça!

Less searchable M0rd4nt

19:30 / 19.05.05

Tremere, Gangrel, whatever. Jeeze, I'm so sorry, Little Ms. I've Swallowed An Entire White Wolf print run.

Oh, alright, I admit it! I've never really played V:TM! I've only ever played the computer game and Tremere was the only clan I could remember offhand! I'm a pathetic apology for a Goth.

*Slumps sobbing into a corner and begins to try and erase Tip-Ex'd clan badge from BLJ*

19:54 / 19.05.05

(* points and laughs at Mordant *)

20:28 / 19.05.05

A dangerous move, Sekhmet. Mordant has powers,

20:34 / 19.05.05

That's why I wear a helmet. Because of the powers.

I always preferred Werewolf anyway.

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