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The miserable thread

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miss wonderstarr

12:05 / 01.09.06

This could go on "angry" thread but I was attacked and (eventually, after being punched to the ground and kicked in the head) robbed of my money and cars by three men last night in a street 2 minutes from my house. So I've just come home from hospital with one eye like a squashed grape, looking like I've had tins of purple and red paint thrown at my face, with a diet of painkillers and an appointment for surgery on Tuesday morning.

Just sucks in a whole lot of ways. Except I didn't let them get my pink ipod. And that hospital staff are so patient and kind they make up for the random malice of some other people ~ and that after banging on two doors I was let into the third house I appealed to, by a lovely young couple who let me bleed on their sofa while they called the cops and ambulance.

12:08 / 01.09.06

Fucking fuck sake.

Fuckin hell, Wonderstarr. Many sympathies. Glad you're relatively 'alright', dude.

12:09 / 01.09.06

That's fucking terrible Wonder, hope that your wounds heal with speed and a terrible karmic "something" happens to your attackers. Be well.

12:16 / 01.09.06

fucking jebus, that's fucked. Jeez.

miss wonderstarr

12:41 / 01.09.06

Thanks

I will be OK. I almost think that being the kind of person who wants to assault and steal from a stranger is karmic punishment enough for the people who did it ~ I can't imagine being that kind of person. Unfortunately it is going to make me feel paranoid in my local area... I have had people try to rob me before, but never quite this violently. Unfortunate also that I've now got 3-4 days to just wait before another bout of hospital.

I am going to take it easy and get back to bed now, thanks for your words though.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

12:52 / 01.09.06

Shit, wonderstarr. That's horrible.

MattShepherd: I WEDDED KALI!

13:27 / 01.09.06

Get well soon. If there's no permanent damage (and I hope there isn't), it all just becomes part of the eventual Wonderstarr legend, right? One for the biographers.

13:32 / 01.09.06

::hugs::

ORA ORA ORA ORAAAA!!

13:37 / 01.09.06

I'm sorry that happened, Wonderstarr. I hope you're ok.

Also: flying death from above to the perpetrators. But that's just me.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

14:03 / 01.09.06

Miss W., I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you make a swift recovery and that something really fucking unpleasant happens to the bastards who did this.

Goodness Gracious Meme

14:05 / 01.09.06

I'm beginning to think that being miserable and angry are perfectly reasonable reponses to the shitty world we live in. No personal strife, don't worry people, just the state of the world.

14:05 / 01.09.06

Stoat and Wonderstarr... *Argh*. Thinking good thoughts for both of you. What horrible things to happen.

Goodness Gracious Meme

14:11 / 01.09.06

I'm beginning to think that being miserable and angry are perfectly reasonable reponses to the shitty world we live in.

No personal strife, don't worry people, just the state of the world.

14:12 / 01.09.06

Piss. What a vile thing to happen, I'm so sorry to hear it.

I'm really glad that you managed to keep your ipod though. You're right that maybe being in the position where mugging someone seems like an option is a bad enough place to be anyway. A pretty miserable place to be in life.

Goodness Gracious Meme

14:19 / 01.09.06

And to both Stoatie and Wonderstarr, you have my sympathy.

19:35 / 02.09.06

Gah. I hope .... actually that's just terrible. Sorry.

20:28 / 02.09.06

Sorry to hear about what happened to you wonderstar, it may be a bit early for me to say this but you should be entitled to some help and mabey compensation after your attack.

I realise that this may not be the right time for anyone to suggest this but with not knowing you in meat space I would not be able to wait for a more convenient time to suggest this.

Here are two links that you should look into, the first is a BBC website giving information about criminal compensation and the other is a link to the criminal injuries compensation board and how to apply.

CICA

Also please make sure that you get a crime reference number of the police, if you reported it and if you did not
make sure that you do.

20:53 / 02.09.06

Oh, fucking hell, Wonderstarr, I've only just got around to reading this thread and hearing about your assault. Not a lot to say; can only hope you're recovering, physically and psychologically. You poor dear; keep in touch.

*

20:57 / 02.09.06

You're in my thoughts, miss wonderstarr. I am impressed by your fortitude and your graciousness, but I hope you don't have to tough it out alone. Be good to yourself.

Tryphena Absent

22:17 / 02.09.06

Heal well!

00:04 / 03.09.06

I currently feel useless.

One of the guys I live with is in a state, he's spoken to me and my bf before, and tonight he's gone, got drunk and knocked on our door. Lonely, bored and down. Understandable as he's depressed, no blame, but... after a hectic, stressful couple of weeks, we've finally gotten to a point we can relax, were having a beautiful evening, which may have led somewhere naughty, and now my bf is having to cope with a rather depressed drunk man.
And bf suggested I don't try and help because its partly a lack of relationship thats put depressed friend in this state, and he was being snipey at me when I was about.

SO I feel useless because I like to help, and down because I'm shattered and now can't sleep, and sad because, well, I was looking forward to curling up together, and waking up in the morning together, after having work get in the way of that.

*mew*

And I don't have anyone else to rant at. So here I am. Nothings particularly awful. I'm tired and emotional and now am sad about situation. So there.

I'm proud of my bf for taking this on, he's very not used to this kind of situation, and he's doing well. But I wish it had been another night, even one I had to get up early the next morning.
C'est la vie.

00:08 / 03.09.06

It's nice that you're supporting him. Alcohol being a depressant, however, it's unlikely that his getting pissed and imposing on you is doing anyone any good.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

00:09 / 03.09.06

Arse. That sucks. I guess it does say nice things about your bf that he's doing this, but... it's still a bit rubbish when you're the "extraneous thing", or whatever.

Try to look at it this way- your night's been fucked up, but your SO's pretty cool.

Sorry. That probably doesn't help much, does it?

00:14 / 03.09.06

"Your SO needs to establish some boundaries and get on with the serious act of curling up together" would perhaps be more apposite, but this is the Miserable thread, and I apologise for gratuitous advice-giving. I'll run away now, and pick daisies.

00:22 / 03.09.06

I'm sure you're a good person, H, and want to do your best for your friend but it's my feeling that, if you're seriously in a one-to-one relationship, that the significant other always and everywhere takes priority.

To the point where, when you're having a well justified quiet night in (and you decide the boundaries of that) with your bf as you were, you just ignore the knock on the door. And if the interloper comes in and starts to whine, you go to bed with your loved one and make whoopee and show the third party how the world works. Sounds harsh, I know, but it's how it goes. No point pretending otherwise. That would be wasting everybody's time and you would be patronising someone who needs to be giving his energies elsewhere.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

00:29 / 03.09.06

See, I'd take that advice. It's not something I've ever done in the past, and it's always been a mistake not to do so.

00:37 / 03.09.06

Let's have that word again. Boundaries. B-oundaries. Boundaries.

miss wonderstarr

07:04 / 03.09.06

Thanks for thinking of me, everyone. I am being looked after as much as I can stand, being an independent and stubborn soul. With my hair unwashed and on end and my face still all clagged with scars and dressing strips, and coloured under the skin with weird purples that bust out at places into dark stars of dry blood, I look quite punk, almost like *koff* almost like *wankers* like Pete off BB.

It is frustrating to be in pain or to be dozy with painkillers, and to not have your money and cards, and have your clothes spoiled etc, but I am healing pretty quickly I think which makes me think I was fit and healthy, and makes me feel better. Also I feel good about not feeling any hatred towards the men who did it.

That criminal compensations site ~ thank you I did look at it on someone else's recommendation and though it says you may have to wait YEARS for any comeback, I am going to get a form from a police station when I can.

Sorry this is more an upbeat post than a miserable one but I don't quite belong on "gives me a happy" thread yet.

miss wonderstarr

07:08 / 03.09.06

robbed of my money and cars

Oh by the way they didn't take my cars. lol! My cards, I meant. (including Nectar, Boots, Cineworld, Rivoli Ballroom Membership... you're welcome to them) I am not a millionaire playgirl with a fleet of vehicles.

07:32 / 03.09.06

Wonderstar, I just remembered, that my ex once told me, that she got blows/kicks to the face too, and took photos of herself in the mirror, and it was looking very bruised, purple and scary (she told me, I never saw those photos and didn´t know her then).

But from her face, when I knew her, you couldn´t tell, and she told me she healed quite fast. And if you look at the face of boxers, except for their noses, you often can´t tell, what damage they´ve taken again and again.

All the same, I wish you a very quick recovery and that you´re happy again, and thumbs up to those nice neighbours!

08:41 / 03.09.06

Miss Wonderstarr, sorry to hear what happened to you. Hope you get well soon, and it has no lasting ill effects. And I hope those guys get caught.

Can I ask you a question? How aware were you that an attack was coming? Was there any precusor to it - verbal or eye contact, or was it just out the blue? Feel free not to answer if you wish, or PM me.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

08:52 / 03.09.06

I was gonna make a joke about the "cars" thing, but didn't feel it would be appropriate, or that I could do it without sounding callous. But the lack of car joke has been bugging me. I now feel a sense of release. Glad you're on the mend, w.

miss wonderstarr

13:39 / 03.09.06

Can I ask you a question? How aware were you that an attack was coming? Was there any precusor to it - verbal or eye contact, or was it just out the blue? Feel free not to answer if you wish, or PM me.

I'll answer if you like, of course. The lead-up to the incident is that I was walking quickly home from a railway station, along quiet residential streets at 11.30pm, when at the junction to the next street I saw three men aged about 25-30, standing spaced at intervals across the road almost like wardens or guards, with a kind of possessive/blocking air about them. But there was room to get past them at one side. They were black, and I think the thought crossed my mind ~ no reason to see them as a threat... a group not a gang... these guys are probably just chilling out talking to each other.

I've been attacked on the street before though (not as seriously) and I knew as soon as the one nearest me started walking along quickly with me, making some pretext at conversation, that everything was going to go pretty much the way it did. So, basically as soon as he wouldn't let me get away, it was all ... you know, it was all horribly inevitable really. Although when I realised I was on the floor being kicked in the head, I did think "this is now quite serious."

I might sound quite matter-of-fact but it's not pleasant to think about.

Disco is My Class War

13:57 / 03.09.06

Ah that's crap. Hope you get better soon mw. And I hope you do good with recovering emotionally too -- being attacked can really fuck your head up, and sometimes it takes a bit longer to recover from that than the physical injuries. (In fact, it takes longer to kick in... shock works in odd ways.) Anyhow, look after yourself well. Eat well, drink lots of water, try to sleep a lot, get to some kind of healing person if you can.

miss wonderstarr

14:12 / 03.09.06

I just came back to post again because I don't want the story above to sound like some kind of "hey, I did the liberal thing of assuming the best about three black guys ... AND I WAS WRONG!" right-wing moral lesson.

If they'd been three white guys I would have gone through a similar process of telling myself I shouldn't assume any threat, with the slight difference that strangers have tried to rob me in the street on three previous occasions, and on each occasion they were black. So, judging only on my own personal experience, there is a slight distinction in how wary I might feel depending on the ethnicity of three male strangers in a street at night.

I really don't want to suggest any kind of racist generalisation in the telling of this unfortunate incident, and I hope it didn't come across that way.

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