Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Conversation >

Things that you find really attractive/exciting that aren't the 'hey bits!' norm

Page: 1 2 3 4 5(6)

Hallo, Paper Spaceboy

15:54 / 03.02.06

Well, keeping in mind that I'm ostensibly monosexual...

1. The rhythm that a friend of mine adopts when she's performing her poetry before an audience (even if only one person) is very sexy. She's also a got a quite nice and very pronounced overbite, now that I think about it. She can be a bit of a handful at times, but quite sexy.

2. Sense of humour which can keep up with mine. Not because I'm so imminently funny, but a body has to be able to keep a comical dialogue going with me. Bonus for a hilarious argument.

3. Shaved heads on boys, especially if they sit there and give themselves a scalp massage in front of me.

18:28 / 03.02.06

How can you not touch a shaved head? On anyone?

18:33 / 03.02.06

Shortly cut hair too. Blade 2 or 3. Eminently wonderful to touch or feel anywhere against your body.

Hallo, Paper Spaceboy

18:42 / 03.02.06

I've always thought that watching someone give themselves a scalp massage was like watching them masturbate. With guys it tends to be something I look for in a partner, so I tend to associate it with them, but girls are also hella cute after a shave.

Girls who have shaved their legs a while ago and now there's the merest hint of stubble.

18:52 / 03.02.06

I like creative people. Generally anyone who brings life to things where it wasn't there before, regardless of medium. Dancers, artists, writers, singers, musicians, magicians etc. It's all equally as swoonsome. Love it. Also compassionate people and bloody smart people who don't take themselves seriously.

Oh, and girls (specifically) who snort when they laugh. That one, I have little defense against.

Hallo, Paper Spaceboy

18:58 / 03.02.06

A good laugh can be very sexy because you get to see how unguarded the person actually is. I don't get off to a restrained, prim laugh. I had a roommate once who laughed a bit like Woody Woodpecker at times, she hated it but it was sexy.

19:20 / 03.02.06

[offtopic]
Have any of you tried the aptly named Erogenator Head Massager?
Pic below:

*makes Homer Simpson drooly sound*
[/offtopic]

19:57 / 03.02.06

*takes off hat, suggestively*

20:11 / 03.02.06

Alas Lepidopteran, the internet could never convey the pleasure fittingly. But I do recommend nay demand that you acquire one or something similar soon.

23:19 / 03.02.06

(Portuguese is very SEXY)

Damn right it is. And so are Brazilian people (I should know, being proudly one of them and thus having spent most of my life surrounded by them also)

Ganesh's post on how she likes 40-something family men who wear leather did turn me on a bit. I'm not quite there yet, being only 29 and happily un-married, but still. Hope it's alright to say it...

23:21 / 03.02.06

From the corner of my eye, that picture looks like an angler fish about to take on a squid.

Those things are great though! Your head tingles in waves for about five minutes after a session.

23:23 / 03.02.06

Hope it's alright to say it...

Probably.

Ganesh ain't a she though....

23:27 / 03.02.06

Um, no.

23:28 / 03.02.06

Ain't? Oh, all those pesky gender-neutral names and neologisms are getting me confused.

Well, whatever, regardless of hir gender, it did make me feel sexy for a moment. No heteropanic here.

(Ganesh, the orignal hindu god, is male though, righ?)

23:29 / 03.02.06

btw, pardon my confusion, Ganesh.

ONLY NICE THINGS

23:34 / 03.02.06

Ladies and gentlemen, compulsory heterosexuality. Ay thangyew.

ONLY NICE THINGS

23:36 / 03.02.06

Blade 2 or 3.

They are both very sexy, but I can't help but feel that the original has a lot going for it. I mean, Snipes really owns the role...

Sorry. Going to bed now.

23:41 / 03.02.06

Talking about Blade 2, those vampires with jaws that open up and had long, snake-like tongs inside... hmmmm, promising. Their lack of hair and veiny skin were a turn-off for me, though

Hallo, Paper Spaceboy

03:59 / 04.02.06

Hey, it's all about the blood bath vampire night club scene at the beginning, but not in a sexy way.

Curious, I'm not sure this fits into the mandate of the thread, but does anyone have any sexual attraction to fetishes that you don't pursue, and why? Something that you've never felt the urge to actively pursue, but it's ... intriguing? Not sure if it fits here. If not, I'll start a new thread, but the distinction between body parts, physical actions, and fetishized objects is a bit indistinct in this thread.

*

05:11 / 04.02.06

DM-- find a gender-neutral pronoun you like and stick to it until you know how people identify genderwise. It will save you much heartache.

Something else I was reminded of today-- watching people eat, or watching them be fed by someone. Another of those moments of vulnerability thingummies, I suppose.

07:22 / 04.02.06

I like watching people light their cigarettes with matches, especially if they have to shelter against the breeze to do so.

And the way some people's hairlines make a gentle upside-down U at the back of their necks, and you can only see it when they've had their hair cut a certain way or when they wear it up.

07:40 / 04.02.06

I like the sound of breaking glass.

And if you don't believe me, why did you ask?

08:54 / 04.02.06

I like when people put on a banana suit and start yelling, "It's peanut butter jelly time!". And they keep yelling it and kind of bounce up and down while yelling it, and then every once in awhile they'll throw in "Peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat!".

Disco is My Class War

13:13 / 04.02.06

The 'wrong' gender Disco? Pray tell, please elaborate on this rather negative implication..

Hence the sacre quotes. Not really wrong, just 'wrong' in the sense of not being the gender you find yourself attracted to by default, or 'normally'. (And I address that question specifically at people who identify as sexually oriented towards one gender. So as not to upset those for whom many genders are the 'right' ones

)

Disco is My Class War

13:34 / 04.02.06

I've been rather busy the last 24 hours, didn't have the opportunity to come back here. But now I am, and I see my comments have spawned a new thread... eek.

Olulabelle, I should be very clear: I was making a blanket assumption about the gender of some of the posts I criticised, yes. I also apologised if I'd made the wrong assumption way up thread. And there is nothing wrong with someone being attracted to something gender-specific: of course not. On the other hand, I think sexual orientation, and even 'fetishes', are socially-constructed: and obviously some of those attraction things are far more saturated with a 'straight' power dynamic. Like, for example, hair on the pillow. 70's softcore porn is exactly what I thought...

I did respond in a combative, snarky way, and yet out of that combative first point, lots of really amazing discussion has ensued. People are being self-reflective in ways that I really appreciate and admire. This thread is now reminding me of Samuel Delany, one of my favourite novelists, who writes a lot about very specific things people find sexy/attractive, irrespective of the 'normal' markers for finding sexual partners. Yay for that.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

16:24 / 04.02.06

Indeed, some great discussion has come out of the combative post, but I still think we could have had the great discussion without the combativeness! Personally I took exception to the post, rather than necessarily the concepts contained within (or, I hasten to add, the poster).

(Off-topic, kind of- Mister Disco, come join the Dhalgren thread for your Delany goodness. I think it's a very Barbelith book, and am surprised it hasn't attracted more discussion, and would appreciate some. Be warned, though- spoiler warnings are necessary when appropriate, as matt's currently halfway through!)

16:38 / 04.02.06

DM-- find a gender-neutral pronoun you like and stick to it until you know how people identify genderwise. It will save you much heartache.

Good advice. I'll stick to "ze" and "hir"...

18:02 / 04.02.06

Grey trousers make just about anyone's arse look better.

I also like unbuttoned shirts, preferably with the cuffs undone and flapping about.

18:56 / 04.02.06

It occurs to me that perhaps some of the strife in this thread has arisen from the fact that some of us have interpreted the question in terms of things one finds specifically sexually exciting, while others are talking about things they find attractive in other, more general ways. I seem to recall something similar happening in the past, when we've talked about kinks and fetishes: there seemed to be a considerable degree of variation in terms of what individuals think of as kinks/fetishes.

Since there's evidence that males have a greater tendency to fetishise than females, I wonder whether any split might be along male/female lines rather than in terms of sexuality. I dunno; it's a theory.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

19:45 / 04.02.06

there's evidence that males have a greater tendency to fetishise than females

Ganesh- not disputing this (in fact it sounds rather plausible, and I'm inclined to believe you) but can you give us some data or links?

19:52 / 04.02.06

I'd have to look for modern stats, Stoatie. From Krafft-Ebbing through Freud and Kinsey it's consistently been found that males are more likely to sexually fetishise - although, particularly with the earlier studies, it's difficult to disentangle historical biases. I think Kinsey's probably the most recent person to study really big samples; I'll have a dig and get back to you.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

19:53 / 04.02.06

Cheers- I'd be interested.

Page: 1 2 3 4 5(6)