The Lateshift: Some pudding is delicious. Some pudding is not.

23:44 / 10.01.04

Sounds good, I reckon you're gonna die, but sounds good. Assuming you don't die, you really are gonna have to write that one up, cos I for one must know how it goes!

23:46 / 10.01.04

Oh wow. Somebody replied to this? I hope you’re going to file a full report with Barbelith tomorrow night.

Well, I’d definitely say ignore all Haus’s advice about spraying your stubble pink, if you’re going to be accompanying a young lady. Making a mustache invisible is no help at all on a date, you just get all the prickly snog-spoiling qualities of a perfectly visible mustache, but with none of the Tom Selleck hunktastic vibrations that no woman can resist. A fake Tom Selleck mustache which can be easily removed in case of emergency is the perfect combination.

In fact, Tom Selleck spots the perfect private investigator mustache. You can’t go wrong if you copy Big Tom’s style. Maybe you should try for a Hawaiian shirt too.

23:47 / 10.01.04

I better not die because I'm planning to go with two different people next weekend.

Who do you think is going to kill me, the subject or the person I'm taking?

23:48 / 10.01.04

Specofdust just told me he was nervous about lateshifting, so after 3, can we all mock?
One....Twoo.....

23:50 / 10.01.04

Bed Head, I got close to 20 replies in about 3 days. 5 or 6 of them sound interesting enough to consider hanging out with, and only 1 was certifiably nuts though it would make a great story. She, however, told me that I didn't sound serious enough about stalking and that our conversation had served its purpose. She CAN climb trees, though. That might've come in useful.

There's a long back story to this, but I'm running out soon so I'm not going to type it now.

23:56 / 10.01.04

Nooooooo! I feel so betrayed

00:10 / 11.01.04

There’s like a little Scottish congregation the Lith, isn’t there? Which of you came first? Is there an original who invited all the others on? How did you come to be here? I only mock what I understand, I’m not like everybody else. As Ray Davies might say.

00:16 / 11.01.04

He follows me, and CLAIMS he found it first- the scoundrel. I think we all came off of sttab, did we? No idea, but I have first scottish dibs on the lateshift.

We went to school together an he's trying to tell me I've never spoken to him. The fraudster.

00:19 / 11.01.04

Oh-kay. And what’s your version of events then, specofdust?

And, while you’re singing like canaries, you can both spill the beans on Jupiter’s Child.

00:21 / 11.01.04

Yup Ded Head, theres got to be at least 4 of us all from the same country. The cheek of it eh?

But yeah, stabb was the original.

00:21 / 11.01.04

Wait... Im confused.... who knows what, here?

00:26 / 11.01.04

Beans on Jupiters Child? Jupiter has three children, two are present. Theres a whooollle other load of beans that we wont go into too. But he just only posts drunk, which is why he perhaps comes off as an asshole. God am I sounding a bitch, I dont mean to.

00:27 / 11.01.04

Sorry Bed Head, B was the intended letter there, umm, my version of events, Stabb joined, then Jupiter's child, then Bop, then me, but i'd been lurking for a bit.

00:31 / 11.01.04

Hmmm. You appear to have hit the ‘D’ key there instead of ‘B’, by mistake, specofdust.

Jesus, sorry, I wasn’t really desperate for bloody information. I just wanted to check that you all knew each other, it’s not as if it actually matters.

Ah, I’m turning in. Another night, another conversation, I think.

00:32 / 11.01.04

Ah. Yes. What you said.

Well, goodnight and sleep well, anyway.

00:36 / 11.01.04

Is there anyone left for me to be all noobish with?

00:44 / 11.01.04

SEE- you scared everyone away- now what did I tell you?
Happy bedding, bed head. x

00:53 / 11.01.04

That you needed chocolate? Sleep well B(B)ed Head.

01:21 / 12.01.04

ahoy-hoy. Anyone here to stop me from playing yahoo hold 'em poker?

02:11 / 12.01.04

umm... I'm here, but I have no means by which to stop you. I can only stand by and watch in despair.

02:16 / 12.01.04

well, i'm not playing for money...though I am tempted to, if only to get in a game where people would be playing as if it were in real life. I blame celebrity poker on Bravo for this.

02:40 / 12.01.04

Bah, screw celebrity poker- the world poker tour baby! Howard Lederer (The Professor) is my personal favorite. Nothing quite like a grown man making another grown man curl up, zip his parka over his head and pull his hat down over his face just to make the first grown man (Lederer) quit staring at him.

I lie. Celebrity poker is also fun, as they are so snarky.

02:52 / 12.01.04

I don't know about snarky so much as drunk and incompetent. Carrie Fisher and the guy from Creed were incredibly wasted. That Creed guy played out of turn, didn't seem to know what a winning hand was, and in general made an ass of himself. And mr. david cross was as adorably foulmouthed as usual. 2 hour special on Tuesday! I've gotta get me over a friend's with cable.

Who is the professional who wrote the bible of texas hold 'em? I think I should pick that up, just so I can memorize all the percentages.

Perfect Tommy

03:12 / 12.01.04

The only time I've played Texas Hold'Em, it was with one other person, for no money, on the floor in an apartment in which the other two people were about to move on from making out to screaming at one another. I got four of a kind three times—I tried to convince the guy I was playing that I was scraping bad luck off of him, mostly because I had just hours before successfully swooped in on a girl he (unknown to me) had the hots for, and I didn't want to worry about taking a pool cue to the back of the head. (This all makes my life sound more exciting than it really is.)

03:34 / 12.01.04

Okay, I just got into a "room" with only 4 other players for awhile, and that went much better because they all seemed to know how to play. It's still really hard to bluff someone out of a $100 yahoo buck pot if they're sitting on 20 grand in imaginary money, though. I've stopped now, though. I promise.

Perfect Tommy

03:49 / 12.01.04

Dude, you can't bluff David Cross.

23:39 / 12.01.04

Shhh! Barbelith is really, really quiet. I think I’m in here all alone. It’s quite nice, reminds me of the time I got locked in at school.

23:59 / 12.01.04

I can think of few worse possibilities.

It is most deadly, and Im almost bored enough to go to bed. What have you done today, BedHead? I gained respect for my manager, annnd I bought a nice pair or trousers annd I ate at funny times.. thats about it. Your day any more exciting?

00:21 / 13.01.04

Thats time up, buddy! Im off to bed, but have fun running naked amoungst your classrooms and suchlike. By the way, do you just lateshift all the time, or do you regu-shift in a different time-zone? Where do you come from? Where do you hide after lateshift dies, or like tonight, never lives? What are your 5 favourite films, do you like harry potter, can you cook, how bad is the decor in the room with your computer?

Well I have to leave you some kinda assignment or you'll get bored! Night night, GBop xx

01:42 / 13.01.04

The grading process, numbers and excel, and the weather, have made me sad. Is there anyone here who can cheer me?

Baz Auckland

01:46 / 13.01.04

I would, but 4004 errors are preventing me from posting it seems...

..ever hear the one about Jesus and the Pearly Gates?