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Underground > Film, TV & Theatre >

Some Ads Are More Evil Than Others

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Regrettable Juvenilia

12:57 / 22.02.02

Inspired by grant's thread on a McDonald's advert in the Music... I know we've had one of these before, but you love it, you swine, so: adverts, particularly TV ads, that not only piss you off in that kind of "vaguely irritating" way, but piss you off in that "evil! evil!" way. Here's a couple of starters:

- the latest UK McDonald's advert. "Gazza, he's just a harmless, lovable buffoon! And not a wife-beating scumbag at all!"

- the advert for The Times featuring that woman from Cold Feet running all the taps: "if information were like water, we'd be drowning". Basicaly the gist of this advert is: phew, there's a few too many sources of news and information these days, aren't there? What with the internet and all that, all these dissenting voices, it's frightfully confusing! Why not get all your opinions about the world in one handy palatable package from a right-wing corporate rag? Yay!

[ 22-02-2002: Message edited by: Flyboy ]

No star here laces

13:06 / 22.02.02

The new Oxo family.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck.

It ruins my night if I see one of these execrable creations even once. What the foosh is a 'suckbutt' anyway? I can imagine the agency-client conversation right now: "The Oxo family has been around for years and is no longer relevant to consumers. So we're going to update them for today's busy lifestylyes: it'll be like the Simpsons. Only shit."

13:06 / 22.02.02

The ads for the new acid blockers like Tagamet, I think, are quite repulsive. They're not so new I guess, these are from several years ago... but the scenario is a guy who can't eat, like, ten pepperoni pizzas and wash 'em down with a six-pack of beer, without getting a stomachache and heartburn... but now there's Tagamet! So why even consider not making a pig of yourself, take a pill and stuff yourself silly!

Where's Circe when you need her?

Regrettable Juvenilia

13:09 / 22.02.02

Oh God, yes, Lyra - the new fucking Oxo family... SO 'poochie'.

13:24 / 22.02.02

I've started writing this whole series of rants for my blog about evil adverts, after sitting through the ad reel before a movie a few weeks ago, and realising that almost every single ad offended/pissed me off in some way.

In fact, today I uploaded a bit about an ad which pisses me off so much I can hardly speak and should, for obvious reasons, have a similar effect on everyone else here.

13:32 / 22.02.02

That Ruby Wax show all about adds, anyone tried watching it - its awful the adds aren't funny and its well Ruby Wax...

although I quite like the new Levi add (with the peeps running through the walls then up the trees)

14:27 / 22.02.02

Sunday New York Times ads - They have a woman saying "I love the arts, and nothing satisfies my passion like the New York Times."

19:49 / 22.02.02

Although it didn't really strike me as bad, but using James Brown's "I Feel Good" in a Metamucil ad just seemed really bizarre.

"Boy, you should've seen me before. I was backed up like a Russian sewer. But thanks to Metamucil, I've got the trots! I feel... I feel......."

<cue "I Feel Good">

09:53 / 23.02.02

My brother & I have a phrase we shout at 'evil' ads we see. "They Live!"

(See the John Carpenter movie of the same name)

09:53 / 23.02.02

Haven't seen most of these. The commercials around here are mostly local, and anyhow I can't watch more than half an hour of tv without groping for things to throw at it. But those ads touting the goodness of Phillip Morris Co. a little while back pissed me off. The thing that got me was my anti-tobacco schoolteacher friend on the couch next to me saying, "They seem like a nice company, I like them." She'd never heard of them before, being neither a smoker nor an activist. She reversed her opinion rather quickly when I told her what they were selling.
oh, and that horrible singing bellybutton commercial. <shudder>

13:16 / 23.02.02

Though no fan of cars, philthy phallic symbol environment trasher that they are, I do rather like the current UK Chrysler ad. And would like to know if it's actually a Kerouac quote or just pseudo-beat pap? Any Kerouac experts out there?

14:39 / 23.02.02

That quote's been bugging me so much that I trawled through half my Kerouac collection to look for it. Haven't found it yet. It sounds very typical Kerouac, but then again it is easy to pastiche.

The one single ad that makes me writhe at the moment is for an air freshener featuring a little kid taking a shit and then smelling it and wrinkling up his face. I mean, come on! We don't need to see this.

22:14 / 23.02.02

quote:Although it didn't really strike me as bad, but using James Brown's "I Feel Good" in a Metamucil ad just seemed really bizarre

Speaking of inappropiate music in adverts, anyone in the UK seen the Harvester advs with The Cristians "Havest for the World" played over images of happy revellers enjoying a good nosh-up?

This has to be the most improper use of a song Ive ever seen. Can anyone think of anything that tops this?

The Sinister Haiku Bureau

22:40 / 23.02.02

That anti-video piracy advert that you get on rental videos, by the 'federation against copyright theft'. For those who you don't know it, it consists of a rather camp young man, in a market, trying to return a pirated video to a sleazy working-class stereotype who sold it to him. The message, of course, being 'video piracy makes you Gay! And that's BAAD! You don't want to be like HIM do you? Noooo! Stick to renting your videos from blockbuster and having sex with women! And being gay makes you want to buy poor quality pirate videos! Poofs are easy to rip off! And all working class people are ripoff artists! '
And Flyboy, I agree wholeheartedly about the times and mcdonalds ads.

22:40 / 23.02.02

So no comment on the government's 'PEADOPHILES ARE EVERYWHERE' hysteria campaign then, eh? Probably for the best..

Evil Ad no.2:

The one for some shitty car, primarily noticable for it's wholsale ripping off of the Fight Club aesthetic (had to happen I suppose) wherein this put-upon, scruffy looking office worker wanders around making faux-cynical, obvious, smarter-than-thou comments about health food, self-help books, office work etc., then makes the somewhat ludicrous assertion that his shiny new car is "..everything THEY don't want me to have!"

And just to rub it in even more, he then points out that the car's got a cigarette lighter, says "naughty" and grins like he's really being subversive and sticking it to The Man.

16:07 / 24.02.02

one that's been bugging me for some time; tescos' 'every little helps'. firstly, it's a whole series of ads designed around the 'stupid old woman'/mother in law stereotype, and secondly, much as i admire the honesty, every little helps means just that - a little is all we'll get. a penny off here, a penny off there, one or two crumbs from the table, and us paupers better be fucking grateful, right?

20:57 / 24.02.02

That Johnny Walker ad with Harvey Keitel. Man, I lost a lot of respect for him that day. Even more than Sister Act.

07:49 / 25.02.02

Car ads that demonstrate that advertisers have identified a "wealthy but caring liberal" market. I've moaned about this before, but it's still showing, so I'll bloody moan about it again, thank you:

"A PRISONER IS MORE THAN A PRISONER" - big scary looking inmate turns round to look at you through the bars of his cell with that look of 'dignified accusation' ("YOU thought I was just a prisoner, didn't you?"). He's holding a paint brush, and he's painted a lovely landscape! Gosh, prisoners are people too, with interior lives and all that. But - heh - I knew that already. I'm a good person, and clever too. The people who made this are my kind of people - they're not a threat to me because I'm actually a bit more sussed than they seem to think I am, and I can relate, in a patronising sort of way, to what they're trying to say. Makes a nice change to all the usual macho car ads anyway, I hate all that. And - what's this? - the Peugeot 306 is more than just a car? Oh. I hadn't thought about that, but... hmmm...

AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!! Kill! Kill!

Rizla:

" this put-upon, scruffy looking office worker wanders around making faux-cynical, obvious, smarter-than-thou comments about health food, self-help books, office work etc., then makes the somewhat ludicrous assertion that his shiny new car is "..everything THEY don't want me to have!"

I've got you - the "full fat, high caffeine" car? Yeah, it's meant to appeal to the same sort of people who bang on about "that bloody political correctness, spoiling our fun," isn't it? Grrr. It's made extra super shit by the fact that it's voiced (I think) by that guy who played Egg in "This Life" and the hard drinking laddish teacher in, um, "Teachers".

08:30 / 25.02.02

i have just been reminded that i should give a big 'fuck off!' to sandals, the holiday company that so believe in love that they only sell holidays on gorgeous sun-kissed beaches to 'couples in love'. that is, as the not so small print at the bottom of the screen states, heterosexual couples in love. they don't take dirty queer money.

The Natural Way

10:03 / 25.02.02

Three words for you: ZOOM! ZOOM! ZOOM!

The Natural Way

10:51 / 25.02.02

..yeah - zoom, zoom, zoom...

05:06 / 26.02.02

and a big shout to the new british telecom ad. cue bloke on sofa, presumably spending his life on the phone, while his female partner looks after the sprog. finally she gets pissed off, dumps the toddler on him and goes out for a night with the girls. the caption at the end says how the dad and child are being brought together by bt.

this is the sort of piss-poor 'feminism' that gives feminists a bad name. one night of 'freedom' shows the men, eh? that makes looking after the baby 24/7 the rest of the time and being ignored by your bloke ok.

oh, and i'm sure the 'what the fuck do i do with this?' look on the bloke's face as he contemplates, possibly for the first time, having to deal with a baby, is a huge insult to a lot of men.....

05:06 / 26.02.02

Yes Car Credit. They have the power to say yes... to nice people.
Which means that if you apply for a loan from them, they will spy on your personal life and make snap moral judgements about you...

05:06 / 26.02.02

quote:Originally posted by Lyra Lovelaces:
The new Oxo family.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck.

It ruins my night if I see one of these execrable creations even once. What the foosh is a 'suckbutt' anyway? I can imagine the agency-client conversation right now: "The Oxo family has been around for years and is no longer relevant to consumers. So we're going to update them for today's busy lifestylyes: it'll be like the Simpsons. Only shit."

I fucking hate Richard Curtis he is a middle class middle class extolling middle class cunt. I know I am not the target market, but these ads, in much the same way as any of his fucking films make me want to puke. Do families ever function like this? Certainly not families who use fucking Oxo in their cooking. Peter Souter's a cunt and so is Richard Curtis. Suckbutt? Kiss my fucking ass.

The Natural Way

05:06 / 26.02.02

Zoom! Zoom! Zoom!

05:06 / 26.02.02

quote:Originally posted by You and Runce:
Zoom! Zoom! Zoom!

Fuck off you. I'm in a Richard Curtis induced rage. In fact I think I'm going to go up to AMV and kill all those posh cunts now.

The Natural Way

05:06 / 26.02.02

No. You see, the worst ads all use M People music... And, I know I've bitched about it before, but what about that one w/ the "Something Inside So Strong" track? Oh, FUCK ME! that one gets me soooo cuntingly riled. That bloody bit w/ the fucking teacher delivering her "you're all worth something" (or whatever) speech to a gang of cool, bighaired, ghettofabulous youngsters. No! Arrrgh!

KILL! KIll NOW! KILL!

ZOOM!ZOOM!ZOOM!

10:01 / 26.02.02

[ 26-02-2002: Message edited by: Sauron ]

The Natural Way

10:07 / 26.02.02

Who says he's an "urban commado"? The Face? I bet it's The Face.... Who fucking reads The Face, and all those shitty rags of like ilk, anyway? I used to when I was about, oh...14. Yr in Ads; why does every ad twat model his campaign on a look spawned in an out of date style rag over a decade ago?

God, your industry needs to get w/ the fucking imagination, already.

Am I being unfair?

10:12 / 26.02.02

[ 26-02-2002: Message edited by: Sauron ]

The Natural Way

10:22 / 26.02.02

Yeah, and I only really notice the annoying ads, so ignore me...

He actually called himself an urban commando? Without the merest hint of irony? Not even a whiff? No, you see, this kind of thing...IT MUST NOT BE ALLOWED! Someone put a stop to it! Help! And I hate the way journalists collude w/ all this bullshit - it's so embarrassing.

10:34 / 26.02.02

Talking of journalistic collusion - does anyone know if it's true that the more 'up-market' a product or brand, the more they'll pay for advertising space in a magazine? I was just wondering, as this might explain why mags are so keen to be seen to cater to a wealthy 'sophisticated' readership.

No star here laces

10:55 / 26.02.02

It's the other way round - the more upmarket the readership of a mag, the more they can charge for the advertising space...

So who likes the new Pot Noodle ads then?

11:02 / 26.02.02

Lyra> thanks, yes, that was what I was trying to say, in my cack-handed fashion.

13:47 / 26.02.02

('urban commando'? wasn't that something to do with Hulk Hogan?)

Today I can't think of a specific ad to bitch about, so I'll go for CLEVER ADS IN GENERAL! It's a total 'better the devil you know' scenario .. ads used to all be dumb and corny, so in the last decade or so we've had increasing numbers of 'clever' (eg, aimed at posh people) ad campaigns, until now they're ever-present, used to sell everything and I WILL FUCKING KILL SOMEONE IF I SEE ANOTHER AD FOR A FUCKING PHONE COMPANY WITH 'ARTY' DRAINED COLOURS, SLOW MOTION SHOTS OF KIDS RUNNING AROUND AND MODELS SITTING IN COFFEE SHOPS AND A VOICEOVER BASTARD MAKING 'MEANINGFUL' OBSERVATIONS ABOUT MY LIFE!!

FUCK OFF!

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