Lateshift's loaded like a gun.

23:48 / 07.12.07

It is, of course, low-energy and low-foot-traffic night at the library, Loaded Sentence adrift in the weird radio waves of doom, no respite from boredom. If only I could justify doing some actual creative work while I was here but I should actually do job-type work. Only there is none. Is anybody else out there, strapped to their lateshift chairs, electrodes correctly applied?

23:55 / 07.12.07

Ready, locked in, and good to... oh, wait... electrodes!

I've got Electros stuck on. Two of them. Made by Hasbro.

Otherwise, I'm zoning out to Warren Zevon with a whisky and coffee in hand, and good to shift.

23:58 / 07.12.07

Wish I had music. I just have people gibbering at the librarian across the foyer and fluourescent lighting bleeding into my skin. I've got a copy of Timequake in my bag that I'd like to be reading, along with a notebook and a story unfinished.

00:05 / 08.12.07

I'll swap you. Especially since my bank's supposed to be calling me at some random time between now and midnight. And I really don't want to talk to them. Or listen.

00:11 / 08.12.07

Lateshift, sweeet lateshift. Like a monastery of drink inspired calm amongst that sanddunes of ideological warfare, how I love thee.

'sup peeps? I just ate a pomegranate with my bare hands. It's one of my favourite things to do, all sticky and red like blood.

Hmmmm. Persepho-licious.

00:25 / 08.12.07

I am the world's laziest little worker bee. I think this can be proven mathematically.

Oh, have I ever told my pomegranate horror story here?

00:26 / 08.12.07

Not to me!

00:33 / 08.12.07

Tell it! Tell it! Do something to alleviate my terrible tedium! Possibly throw in some dancing boys in tight little briefs to make the horror story more detailed.

00:37 / 08.12.07

Right, then. Story time.

Years ago, in a Mexican grocery store here in the States (Tresierras, probably), I came across a display of pomegranates, which is fine 'cause I really love'em. However, above the display was a giant advert with what appeared to be Donna Reed in a headscarf pulling a tray of steaming pomegranates from the oven, all smiles and happy, with flowers everywhere, like they'd rained down from the ceiling, and below her, the legend: DECORATE YOUR HOME!

Now, this may not disturb you - or anyone - as much as it hit me, but I still shudder at even the thought of pomegranates, on the basis that somewhere out there, Donna Reed's baking the things with daisies. Gasp shudder twitch eeugh shudder.

00:40 / 08.12.07

Um... and then there were dancing boys! And we all rejoiced. And dancing girls showed up just to balance out the impact. None whom looked like Donna Reed.

(That's the coda, that up there. It's like happily ever after, with more hip action and tight little glittery thongs.)

00:59 / 08.12.07

ZOMG! Donna Reed's pomegranates killed the shift!

01:02 / 08.12.07

I think the daisies killed the shift.

Hello.

01:03 / 08.12.07

I..
I don't understand that story...

...except the coda. Oddly, that made a lot of sense.

01:07 / 08.12.07

So you don't like pomegranates anymore just because you saw them cooked with daisies, DD?

I just got done watching the second disk of the first season of Ugly Betty. It's a strangely addictive show.

01:10 / 08.12.07

I like them less, I guess. I have to try very hard not to think about the advert and that must be like, from a taste and texture standpoint. It's a bit like me and not thinking about the context of the McDonald's double cheesburger if I want to enjoy one. I can do it, but some days it just doesn't seem worth the effort.

Oh, and, Hi, LN.

01:14 / 08.12.07

Well, they put too much salt and pepper on those cheeseburgers if you ask me. It's as if they are hiding something (which they probably are).

They should market fleshless pomegranates. Picking out all those seeds is too labor-intensive for me.

I am a lazy person.

01:15 / 08.12.07

I realise now that as a response to the stickiness of my beard (pomegranates) I've been trying to get rid of the icky feelings by plucking the beard hair out with my nails.

This, obviously, is much more painful than just shaving and/or washing.

I think it's time for me to go to sleep.

Night all. Enjoy the dancing youths.

01:19 / 08.12.07

(LN, don't pick! You're missing out on an opportunity. Hold the pomegranate above a bowl and tear and smack the seads out. It's quicker and you get to feel like a maenaed(sp?) for a little while)

01:19 / 08.12.07

Maybe it's just time to wash your face?

*sigh*

Ah, well. Goodnight, Princess!

01:20 / 08.12.07

Oh, and thanks for the pomegranate tip!

I'll try that!

01:21 / 08.12.07

Whoa. Donna Reed. "That Damn Donna Reed!" And the daisies...

I have made my menu for Wednesday's supper club adventure. Penne with a smoked salmon cream sauce, and a Pear & Blue Cheese salad.

01:23 / 08.12.07

Ohhh, sounds yummy.

Supper club adventure?

01:28 / 08.12.07

LS, you know you're now honor-bound to mail me a package of that meal, right? And it has to arrive fresh and hot.

Otherwise, that post is just cruel.

And, wow, it's a bit weird not to call you 'Papers' anymore. I like the new name, BTW. It's very forward-inspiring.

01:56 / 08.12.07

I needed a change. Papers can - will - maybe? - fall away like, er, papers. Discarded. For the moment at least.

LN-- every Wednesday, I meet with four friends for a supper club. We rotate who cooks and whose house it's at. This week, it's my turn.

02:01 / 08.12.07

That's really cool, LS. I'd love to do something like that, but my friends are all scattered around the world right now.

Time to make more friends, I guess.

02:16 / 08.12.07

So, what I thought was a rejection letter just got read by yours truly. And it wasn't. In fact, they want more material!

I so love not being rejected.

(They did ask for more ethnic-y work, which almost sours it, though.)

02:29 / 08.12.07

Ethnic-y work? What does that mean, exactly?

02:31 / 08.12.07

Literally, they asked me if I had any work that was 'more ethnic' and left it at that. I'm just going to send them stuff and let them worry about whether it fits that request or not; try hard not to think about it.

Triplets

02:31 / 08.12.07

I believe Decadent is [percentage]-Native American, which might have something to do with it.

02:33 / 08.12.07

Did they specify any particular ethnicity?

02:34 / 08.12.07

Ah, right. I didn't even think to explain that end. ET's sussed out the request's most likely impetus.

02:37 / 08.12.07

No specification, though, so I suppose I could give them a pastiche on Moore's new [b]League of Extraordinary Gentlemen[/b] comic, which I gather is heavily dependent on British ethnic identity/ambience.

I suspect the best thing to do is just plug along and hope they just run whatever I give'em.

02:39 / 08.12.07

If it was me, I'd be totally tempted to call them out on that shit. I'd be all "What do you mean, 'ethnic'? So there's two categories and one of them is 'ethnic'?"

Ahem.

02:42 / 08.12.07

Yeah, but if I were you being me (did I track that right?) we'd be out of work.

Actually, considering the diversity-in-cast of the pieces they currently have, they may mean something entirely outside of anything I'm thinking.

Anyhow, how you doing ET? Can't remember the last time I saw you in a shift.