Lateshift Begins

00:24 / 17.06.05

bah..book smarts is nothing compared to the power of actual experience...or the force. Im not sure which.

00:27 / 17.06.05

Wasn't Beadle also a regular guest on either Breakfast Time or GMTV many moons ago, and used to present segments about Victorian murders or somesuch?

Truly a man with hidden depths. In his cellar. Where he keeps the pretty ones. Hush, darling, hush. Jeremy will take care of you now. Now now, don't cry - you'll make a mess of your lovely face.

00:29 / 17.06.05

Urgh. I did not need to know that, spatula, kindly leave the stage.

00:30 / 17.06.05

No. Tell me more! Tell me all about the wonders that is Uncle Jeremy!

00:31 / 17.06.05

The teeny tiny hand was the same size as the other once upon a time, you know. That's what you get for offering up an unpure sacrifice to the Elders, I guess.

Tryphena Absent

00:32 / 17.06.05

I'm watching the God channel and apparently Jesus loves me. I don't think he can supplant Denmewed though.

Jeremy does have the facial hair of a man who owns a lot of books on the occult.

00:35 / 17.06.05

Can I tell my Beadle joke? Can I? Can I?

00:36 / 17.06.05

Yes, tell us your joke!

00:36 / 17.06.05

Thing is, taking the piss out JB for having Poland's syndrome is a bit dodgy, and has been done by the tabs for ever.

Especially when taking the piss out of him for inflicting endless 'home video cock-up', 'hilariou prank' and other excerable tv fare on us is readily available.

Keg, mate, you really don't want to know...

Tryphena Absent

00:38 / 17.06.05

I do. I'm tough. Tell us your joke!

00:38 / 17.06.05

Oh, go on...

GGM, you don't have to look if you don't want to...

00:39 / 17.06.05

Tell Us! Tell Us! One of Us! One of...whoops. Tell Us!

Triplets

00:40 / 17.06.05

Yay! Uncle Stoatie is funny!

00:40 / 17.06.05

Ahem.

Jeremy Beadle has a tiny penis.

(wait for it)

On the other hand, it's quite large!

I'll get me coat.

00:44 / 17.06.05

oof. There were a bunch of terrible Victor Lewis-Smith ones as well, but I genuinely can't remember any of them.

Mind you, was reading an interview with JB a while ago, in which put all criticism down to 'jealousy'.

Which tells you much of what you need to know, Keg.

00:46 / 17.06.05

Well that was a funny joke.

00:53 / 17.06.05

Thing is, taking the piss out JB for having Poland's syndrome is a bit dodgy, and has been done by the tabs for ever.

Well, yeah, it is. Or would be, by normal standards. This is the man who brought misery to untold numbers of innocent bystanders in his quest for laffs, who made it his business to cause real distress and then attempt to justify it by going "Only me! If you don't find it funny, you haven't got a sense of humour! I'm a merry prankster! I am the modern Puck!"

It's not really up there with 'Shiteyes' Blunkett in the dodgy stakes, is it?

alas

00:55 / 17.06.05

I'm going to China tomorrow and so far as I know that has nothing to do with Jeremy Beadle, Poland's syndrome, small hands or small penises...However, the last time I went to a country where I was virtually completely illiterate was Poland circa 2003....

00:56 / 17.06.05

Yeah, I had just thought of that meself. Possibly, he's forefeited his right to dignity, having done so much 'no, your husband hasn't left you for a fireman.... it was just a PRANK' bollocks....

00:56 / 17.06.05

China... syndrome...

...someone help me out here.

01:00 / 17.06.05

ooh, alas, where in china? Work or holiday?

01:01 / 17.06.05

China syndrome?..cant you just get tupperware like everyone else

01:03 / 17.06.05

Gah, this job's a bitch for avoiding Dr Who spoilers. Fucking tabloids.

01:04 / 17.06.05

You want to try being a Film, TV & Theatre mod

01:04 / 17.06.05

Boom! Boom!

01:06 / 17.06.05

(Link being a response to keggers, but my pc's so slow it took me that long to google a link)

alas

My China syndrome is work and pleasure: Shanghai, Beijing, and Hong Kong.

I'm looking into foster care agencies, for the work part. But mostly we've had a Chinese student living with us for a year, and who is going to live with us next year, and so I have a built-in tour guide...So it should be fun. But the plane leaves at 6:50 tomorrow morning! And it's a long way to Shanghai from here, let me tell you...

And also coz I just think there should be more mentions of Basil Brush round here.

Thats nothing...we're so far behind in canada that I dont go anywhere near anything that mentions Dr. Who.

Spats- I was just thinking that this afternoon, and how shit it must be for you! (see, I'm all heart, me.)
Oh well... only two days to go...

01:08 / 17.06.05

wow, sounds v.interesting. And from what I gather much of China is pretty tricky without local help, so should be v.cool.

01:09 / 17.06.05

Yay on the going to China thing, alas! Should be mental!

alas

01:09 / 17.06.05

I am very excited. I hope I can sleep tonight. I'll be walking the Bund in no time!

alas

01:18 / 17.06.05

Well, I better try to get some sleep. I'll try to post at some point from a cafe in one of the big cities, but it may be a few weeks! Pleasant dreams, Barbelith! Take care! Don't forget to write!