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Underground > Creation >

One sentence angst

  
  

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Mourne Kransky
12:46 / 20.09.02
As the life and the milk ebbed from his moribund coconut self, John's criminally vulgar yet charming soul started flying gently towards the Light, only to veer suddenly leftwards and down again to Earth, at the very last moment, singing "Stool Pigeon, ah cha cha cha..."
 
 
cusm
15:30 / 20.09.02
John opened his eyes, and looked through the bars of his cage.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
17:16 / 20.09.02
He headbutted the bars.
 
 
gridley
17:46 / 20.09.02
Through the bars he could see a wooden rack full of tiny glass bottles, some sort of workbench, a tabby cat sleeping in a shaft of pale orange sunglight, and twelve other cages just like his.
 
 
paw
18:21 / 20.09.02
Despairing, John pulled out his last trick, a multi-universe shredding orgone accumulator
 
 
Mr Tricks
18:48 / 20.09.02
YET, before he could activate it, the wall behind Monkey John collapsed as a Huge Panda dress in an obviously ill fitted superman suit burst through growlling "How can you say I go about things the Wrong way!!! I'm Not human but I need to be loooved, Just like every other Panda does!!!"
 
 
gridley
19:03 / 20.09.02
"Wait!" said John, feeling very confused, "I thought I was a coconut right now, since when am I a monkey?, I mean didn't a monkey just kill me or something, and who is this panda, I mean I used to be a panda, but that was quite some while ago, and it was only me, and why am I in a cage, and why does positively everyone in my life sing Morrissey lyrics at me, just becaused I'm depressed, doesn't mean I wouldn't like to hear some Kylie Minogue now and again, does it? I mean does it? Jesus Christ, I think I'm going to cry, right here in my cage..."
 
 
paw
19:06 / 20.09.02
'No', thought John, 'I will not cry and will instead use the orgone accumulator'.
 
 
Mr Tricks
19:08 / 20.09.02
"It's all going to be Okay" an omnipresent somewhat toothy voice uttered, "I know it's serious, when your girlfriend's in a coma."
 
 
paw
19:21 / 20.09.02
'You're not my god Morissey' shouted john, 'eat orgone!'
 
 
cusm
19:41 / 20.09.02
"NooooOOooOOoooo...." screamed the Morrisy / Panda / Superman / Monkey abomination, its flesh falling off it in thick liquid glops as the rays of anti-orgone reduced it to its most basic and true form: a duck.
 
 
Mr Tricks
19:54 / 20.09.02
Strapped to the lab-table the Duck quacked franticly as Dr. Toothy adjusted the electrodes designed to converts animal consciousness into english; the disection of Morrisey the talking Monkey had yelded great technological advances, and Dr. Toothy was eager to hear what a carnivorous Duck had to say.
 
 
NotBlue
20:16 / 20.09.02
"My highest sights were always beneath me......"
 
 
Mr Tricks
20:32 / 20.09.02
The Mechanical voice uttered as the Duck gasped it's last quack "I was once called John..."
 
 
Tryphena Absent
22:27 / 20.09.02
God loved John, God was Morrissey, John and Morrissey got it on (in the train).
 
 
paw
22:46 / 20.09.02
'My God, Morrissey, your hands have become atomic warheads aimed at my cock!' screamed John.
 
 
Mr Tricks
23:49 / 20.09.02
Dr. Toothy double checked his equipment, certain that it was recording the ranting of a carnivorous duck, he sat in his chair with a sigh of relief, thinking "Clark is going to just love this one."
 
 
gridley
10:19 / 21.09.02
"In Seattle, there is a pregnant ballerina," continued the translation, "her name is Sheila and she's much too thin, maybe intentionally so, because her boyfriend moved back to Antwerps to murder his mother, a woman he has never met, but whom a blind man has hired him to kill, choosing both victim and killer randomly with a spinning wheel and a phone book he borrowed from an upstanding local policeman who is even now speeding away in a high-speed chase after several highly-armed Chinese drug dealers, who..."
 
 
Tryphena Absent
10:54 / 21.09.02
'Fuck me', thought the good doctor, 'that was a terribly breathless sentence, I wonder how Sheila is at the moment because I haven't seen her for three years, she used to pirouette so beautifully, if only I had followed my dreams and become a ballet dancer'.
 
 
cusm
11:56 / 21.09.02
Just then, Dannie Aielo bursts through the door, and with a look on his face that seems to say "Not this again...", knocks Dr. Toothy aside with one meaty fist, grabs the duck from the table (John still digesting in its colon), and takes him away to safety.
 
 
000
09:40 / 23.09.02
Which was the worst possible time for his constipation to loosen itself.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
14:24 / 23.09.02
Thus propelled, at great speed, from the duck's explosive arse, he was fortunately excreted in the direction of his multi-universe shredding orgone accumulator, which hummed into life as he knocked the on switch en route rapide to the maw of the quixotic machine.
 
 
Panda.
21:42 / 23.09.02
"This is getting somewhat ridiculous" said a naked King Mob, dildo in hand...
 
 
cusm
14:02 / 24.09.02
"That's the last time I go chatting on the net while on Key23. Fucking Internet monkies," King Mob grumbles to himself, rubbing his green lipstick smeared head as he wanders off looking for his pants.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
17:24 / 24.09.02
They were pink with little green spots for his taste in underwear was unfortunate at best.
 
 
Mr Tricks
18:30 / 24.09.02
At this point The TURD JOHN realised he was 'A Dream.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
22:00 / 25.09.02
He yawned and stretched, his hand feeling the cool reinforced glass of the train window, and felt again the faintly erotic thump-thump-thump of the wheels on the tracks beneath, moving in slow unison with the throbbing pustules which scarred his panda-like face.
 
 
bacon
22:48 / 25.09.02
Meanwhile, at the other end of the car, an old white haired woman clad in dirty house coat and blue hospital slippers raised her thin, yellowed, tightened fist to her mouth as she strained out a long and unsatisfying yawn.
 
  

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