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Mafia - The Game

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Joy Division Oven Gloves

15:12 / 23.05.06

One-Mitt was stumped. Sure, the rats could have cut Yaz loose to boost their own position in the neighbourhood but it would have been a risky plan, too risky at this stage.

But then even assuming everyone else who'd fingered Yaz was innocent that still left 8 to choose from. and, unless the giggle-water Bazmo was pedalling had started to mess with his eyesight, One-Mitt couldn't see no pattern. Or to be more accurate he could see too many, none of which seemed any more on the trolley than the next.

Maybe he wasn't going about things the right way though. Remembering a dormy trick Maneki had mentioned her grand-mother using in times of confusion, One-Mitt settled down in his seat, closed his eyes and thought about the question if a stool-pigeon sang like a canary under glass with no elephant ears around to hear, did they make a sound?

rising and revolving

18:02 / 23.05.06

I knew it. I'm never a man to point the finger until the jokers called, and Yaz had been no exception. Looks like all the movement was running along predictable lines - the mob were running scared, and hadn't had time to put a plan together. It's easy to kick back and assume that everyone who fingered Yaz was on the side of the angels, but I knew that was a dead-end line of thought.

There's only one man here who can be trusted, and that's me. Some nights I ain't even sure of that.

After all, all the mob had to do was watch and realise that Yaz was a goner. Moving from there, they'd be sure to throw a few votes his way in order to ease suspcion.

Whole towns full of cowards. A couple people hanged, one for being bent, the other for being quiet. Well, I wasn't going to let either quality stop me. Everyone else knows who we need to send up the pole. The man who Yaz worked with - his partner in suspicion. Time for Feverfew to make the long drop.

If saying that name, in public, put me at risk - so be it. No-one was going to stop old R&R putting the mob on the fire.

19:33 / 23.05.06

Feverfew stood, sorry and accused, but not all that shocked. How Rising could think he was one of the Barbelith Family was a deep mystery, wrapped in an enigma, sequestered in a puzzle. It would take some consideration.

'Still', he thought, 'If I have to be second to vote again, then so be it, I will. I'll not have my good name slandered by anyone.'

'I stick with my guns. I still have a hunch. Even if I wanted to make things right for now, I still think that Von Mises has a shady background that he's not telling us about.'

'Of course, if I end up dancing the hemp fandango, it won't matter so much. But consistency is a watchword in these dangerous times.'

Having thought this, he crosses the road, pins his vote to the community board, and goes back to the stall, still confused about the way things turn out, sometimes.

20:51 / 23.05.06

Blood ran down Johnny Biz's fist. But it wasn't his.
Sammy Fortenza spat a tooth. He flexed his hands against the rope, but it seemed more like exercise than an attempt to escape.
Johnny gnawed a wood-chip.
"Spill."
"I am spilling."
"Not blood. Words. Names."
"Can't sing when I don't know the song."
"Know it? You wrote it."
Fortenza's grin was black and white and red all over.
"I'm telling you Johnny, I'm not in cahoots with any of this Barbelith Family."
"Don't care about Cahoots. Care about Catlipoca."
"Look, I'll... I'll ask around, but they're my enemy too. I don't want them taking my racket either."
"Not going to get my racket. Going to get a couple of coffins. Lots of wood."

Regrettable Juvenilia

22:04 / 23.05.06

"Call him off, Mises!"

"I don't know how."

11:50 / 24.05.06

Citizens, today is Wednesday. I got two votes so far, so unless youse hurry, there's gonna be a lot of blood on the streets of Little Catlipocia.
I know you're worried - we're all worried - but the Barbelith Family has still got two wiseguys here somewhere, and I'm not going to let that stand.
So bring me your votes and let's wash these scum from our fair streets.

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

13:43 / 24.05.06

Elijah leaned against a lamp post outside the building where he rents a room, watching the traffic go by. Walking to the posting he notes that only two votes are in, and everybody seems to have clammed up.

'Well,' he thought to himself, 'I for one don't plan to be killed for inaction like poor whats his name last time around. I hate to do it, she always had my brand for me, but I can't beleive that someone is opening an opium den in our neighborhood. If that isn't someone trying to move in on the area then I don't know what is,' and with that he wrote Maneki on the board and wandered towards the fruit stand, wondering if his order of cherries had come in yet.

16:07 / 24.05.06

After the hangings, things hadn't been the same in the Little Catlipocia, a great dark cloud had descended over the little hamlet. The bloated corpse of Yaz, tied with heavy fibrous ropes to a pillar in the town's centre, stank. Dalliance covered his nose as he passed and after a few days when that failed to rebuke the pervasive smell began to clasp both hands over his face. "A sign for The Barbelith Family, sure, but barbaric for the modern age" he thought.

His vote for Benny had been a mistake. "Too quiet" he'd thought, someone must have scared him so bad he wouldn't even vote. He'd been wrong but those 'Lithers had surely gotten to him somehow. Johnny Biz had been his first instinct, today, thinking of poor Triple he didn't know why he'd ever changed his mind.
Johnny Biz, never been anything but a low life.

The Blue Lotus, he liked, maneki gave old timers like him a break and didn't go in for the rough stuff Triple used to pull if he drank too much. He'd been in there alot more lately as he hadn't been feeding the pigeons, too many crows attracted by the carrion.

P. Horus Rhacoid

16:30 / 24.05.06

Fiver looks up at the sign reading 'The Blue Lotus.' An opium den? For serious? And this soon after poor Benny had his date with the hangman, without even a hint of mourning? Sure, the townspeople need their special tonic, but they can always get that from Feverfew.

"That Maneki, taking advantage of Benny's bum deal. It isn't right! It isn't right."

He pins his vote to the community board and then heads off to find Feverfew, in search of a drink.

19:39 / 24.05.06

Maneki felt beat, she had to stay off the gum and keep a clear head or she would end up in a wooden kimono.

Some people seemed to beat their gums about her taking over Benny's joint but what choice did a girl have in this town? Find a daddy or make good for herself. Benny and her didn't exactly drink out of the same bottle but he would've understood.

Now why did that Mr Big Cheese from out of town want her take the jump this evening? Maybe he was all burned up because she peached on one of the family last time. And how did he make all his money without straying from the straight and narrow once in a while? It wasn't exactly duck soup but Maneki felt sure that Elijah was a wrong number.

Regrettable Juvenilia

20:57 / 24.05.06

Feverfew has tried to get Ludwig Von Mises lynched not once but twice, even after the good Doktor's inimitable instincts have been proven to be correct. He is either a Mafia member or an imbecile. Either way, there is no place for him in the brave new world that Von Mises is doing his humble bit to help built. Let him swing at the end of a rope.

21:12 / 24.05.06

Chee! So that's the e-connymist's game, huh? Get rid of local businesses and move in with his Wal-Stall. Johnny knew which side his banana was buttered, he wasn't gonna let nice Mr Feverfew swing, nuh-uh. Herr Von Mises Johnny ist sein Anklaeger!

22:53 / 24.05.06

A note hangs on the ol' lynching board:

"I have my suspicions,
I hope that they're right.
That oddball Von Mises
Should hang from the light."
---Bazmo

Joy Division Oven Gloves

00:19 / 25.05.06

One-Mitt was kinda balled at the rush to finger citizens who'd flushed out a rat the previous day. He reckoned von Mises looked clean, at least for now, and he didn't think the mafia were such palookas they'd vote together on the first day so that was Feverfew out.

Maneki. Well he'd had a hinky about her when she'd started spinning her 'little Jimmy' schtick. But ever since he'd gotten a sniff of that mudpipe she was smoking One-Mitt got a real good feeling whenever he thought about her.

On the other hand, Sammy Fortenza had been a big spender at the bakery but now would probably be making do with a single pretzel to suck on all day until his teeth grew back.

One-Mitt scribbled a name on the notice. Johnny Biz. That'd teach him not to stick with working the body.

01:02 / 25.05.06

Bazmo leans into the radio to listen:

"With 10 votes in, the results are as follows:

Von Mises leads with 3 votes - Feverfew, Cube, Bazmo

The rest follow with 2:
Feverfew - Rising+revolving, Von Mises
Maneki - Elijah, Fiver
Johnny Biz - Rupert D, One-mitt

And Elijah gets 1 vote...
Elijah - Maneki

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

04:02 / 25.05.06

"The vote for me is obviously a spitefull revenge vote from the young lady.

I cannot help but notice that her only action when being accused of bringing new crime to our fair neighborhood was to make this baseless accusation."

06:00 / 25.05.06

Maneki would never act out of revenge. After laying off the pipes for a while and a few cups of Joe she had consulted the I Ching again and it confirmed her suspicion: "a king on his horse, riding into town" - who else could that be than the money man from the West Coast -Elijah the Profit?

And yes, he voted for Yaz but only when his fate already seemed sealed and nothing could have saved him from taking the jump.

06:16 / 25.05.06

Paleface has been quiet today, tossing things over in his mind. He's got some ideas, but nothing worth discussing. By tomorrow, though... a lot could be worth discussing.

Von Mises pointed out that feverfew has now voted for him twice. Could it be that feverfew knows something the rest of us don't? Von Mises certainly seems keen to get rid of him, that's for sure.

"I'd be lying if I didn't mark my vote for the Austrian," thought Paleface, "even if he's never done me no harm". That's it, then. Ludwig Von Mises to swing.

Regrettable Juvenilia

07:07 / 25.05.06

Honestly, have people forgotten how to play this game already? The objectives, etc.?

09:31 / 25.05.06

Johnny Biz chewed a pencil. Brain-food. He'd worked over a cart-load of local goons but they'd all clammed up. The Barbelith Family had either big fists or big pockets.
Or, considered Johnny, a big brain...
He'd been there over Johnny's shoulder during the beatings, watching with a grave expression.
Von Mises.

Regrettable Juvenilia

10:07 / 25.05.06

You crack-guzzling simpletons. I hope the Mafia riddle you full of holes, every last one of you - something they would never have been able to do to me, since I am BULLETPROOF.

10:18 / 25.05.06

Without casting aspersions; "So say You, Von Mises. So say you. However, I am very, very sorry that it has come to this."

Regrettable Juvenilia

10:22 / 25.05.06

No you're not, you Costra Nostra affiliated nincompoop. I can only hope that my sacrifice is not in vain, and that you are seen for the scoundrel you are when I am gone.

10:31 / 25.05.06

I truly am sorry - no-one wants to vote for a lynching. I just have my... suspicions, and evidently they're shared by other pillars of the community, that this strange sinuous socialist in our midst who calls himself an "Adventurer" is more than what he seems.

For my part, I am but an innocent seller of fruit, without affiliation to any group other than the Grocer's union, and they're not so much use in a fight; however, have you seen the damage a thrown pineapple can do?

rising and revolving

13:07 / 25.05.06

I was hot on the trail. Feverfew wasn't going to swing, but he knew I was on to him. That was enough for now. In the meantime, it looked like the town was coming down on nice lil Maneki. Sure, she ran an opium den, but we all had our failings.

I rubbed the lump on the back of my head. The man responsible had died for his efforts. Soon enough, there'd be more death. Enough death to keep the entire town wondering.

I'd had a call from Mises that morning, asking my to call off the deal. Seemed like he was having second thoughts. Trouble is, it ain't about him any more. In fact, it was never about him. That's not the way dickery works, not where I come from.

Seemed he was gonna swing. Foreign or no, bulletproof or no, screaming or no. Dying time on the line.

What got me was why no-one was asking the hard questions. We'd see Mises swingin' by the end of the day - and we'd see whether he was black or white - or as Bulletproof as he claimed.

Once that's in the bag, you need to ask yourself who's acting - and why. Cos even though Feverfew is a rat, he's got a little ratty pal.

Everything's in the bag. True colours beginning to show.

Yeah. You know what I mean.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

13:11 / 25.05.06

Looks like it's all over bar the shouting, thinks Stoatface. And here's me still none the wiser. He orders another shot, and muses. Absolutely no idea who the other wise guys are- Yaz was just blind luck on the town's part, but they don't seem to be runing scared yet. By now they should be out for the count, but doesn't seem to be going that way.

Hell, self-preservation's all I got left. And that means voting with the majority. Sorry, Von Mises, but it looks like your adventuring days are over. Not much profit in that.

He knocks back the whisky and strides out into the bright- too bright, actually, fucking HELL that's bright- morning to cast his vote.

21:44 / 25.05.06

Dusk settles upon the wharf of Little Catlipocia. The town has gathered, tense with excitement at the prospect of having brought to rough justice yet another of the vile Barbelith Family.
Von Mises stands at the edge of the wharf, his hands bound behind his back, his eyes blindfolded. There is a calmness about him; that same calm that settles over a man who sees his end and is prepared to meet it.

Don Catlipoca steps forward, then raises his hands for silence.
"Any last words," he says firmly, turning to the good doctor.
Von Mises gives a derisive snort, then remains silent.
Don Catlipoca nods, then waves his left hand in signal...

Winston 'Legs' Diamond steps out from the crowd. A large man, resplendent in his striped suit, hat, and chewing his trademark cigar, Legs has been the Don's sharpshooter for as long as anyone would care to remember. An old soak he may be. A cigar fiend, perhaps. But Legs never misses.

And suddenly the air explodes to the sound of 700 rounds per minute. There is a shower of sparks, and the air buzzs wildly as the bullets ricochet from the body of Von Mises. The crowd hits the floor, some drawing their own weapons, as Don Catlipoca yells out for Legs to cease fire.

There is a splash, then the sounds stop abruptly. A wisp of thin grey smoke curls up out of the barrel of the now spent Tommy gun.

Don Catlipoca, together with the rest of the community, stands up and brushes himself down.
The body of Von Mises has vanished, forced backward by the fury of the bullets, and tumbled down into the black depths of the Chicago River.
Don Catlipoca walks slowly to the edge of the wharf, glances down at the now still waters, then turns to the crowd.

"Fellow Catlipocians," he begins gravely. "I don't think any of us is in any doubt as to what we just witnessed. That poor drowned guy was Bulletproof, immune to all but the justice of this mob. By now he's sleeping with the fishes, but we must not loose heart, or our vigilance. The Barbelith Family is responsible for this man's death, not us, and rest assured that they will be found out."

************************************

Ok, people. It is now Night. Remaining Mafia, Detectives, Doctor, Fink, PM me your respective targets please.

07:11 / 28.05.06

"What happened, Fats?" asked Don Catlipoca.
Fats shakes his great head as he stands, together with the Don and a small crowd of onlookers, before the wreckage of twisted metal that lies in the street.
"Breaks, Boss. The Mafia. They dun sommat to the breaks."
Don Catlipoca gives a slow nod, his mouth hardens to a taught line. "Have you identified the three victims?"
Fats shrugs. "Only one intended, Boss. These other two was unlucky enough to be crossing the street when the car went outta control. Them two is just a couple of sailors arrived today on the SS Substandard."
"And the driver?"
"Rising and Revolving, boss."

**********

Three hours later, the wreckage has been cleared from the street. The community have all assembled at Fats' Barbershop to hear the results of the Don's investigation.
"My fellow Catlipocians," he announces, standing in the doorway to the shop. "I got news, and it aint good. My guys have searched Rising's place and searched it good, but couldn't find nothing. The man was an Innocent."
The Don pauses and a shadow passes over his face.
"We still got two Mafia to find, and it's a brand new day. People, you know the routine. Now find me the Mafia."

23:05 / 28.05.06

Just for the record, last weeks votes were:

Von Mises - Feverfew, Cube, Bazmo, Stoatface, Paleface, Johnny Biz,

Feverfew - Rising+revolving, Von Mises
Maneki - Elijah, Fiver
Johnny Biz - Rupert D, One-mitt

Elijah - Maneki

23:09 / 28.05.06

hmmmm.... Feverfew not only voted twice for Von Mises, but the Innocents Rising and Von Mises also voted to lynch him... was there something he knew before the Barbelith Mafia snuffed him out?

00:00 / 29.05.06

Personally, I think that's a hint too far Bazmo, I've had my suspicions about Feverfew too but that seems too much like a set up....
I could be wrong, I suppose, but I really don't think I am.

10:13 / 29.05.06

I agree - I thought Feverfew's obsession with von Mises looked suspicious but the death of rising + revolving makes him look too guilty. Surely, if he were a member of the Mafia he would be more subtle?

So to me it looks like a set up - but then all this could be a double bluff and aarrgh...

Joy Division Oven Gloves

14:50 / 29.05.06

One-Mitt didn't buy into the idea the grocer was mafia either. Sure he'd had an unhealthy obsession with von Mises but these kind of neuroses were to be expected in a man who spent too much time handling his own fruit.
What he was more grummy about was how come at least 4 innocent citizens had accused the guy with by far the best claim to being clean after the first day and got him whacked?

Hitting R+R was a good move by the rats. It set up Feverfew - a bit too obviously but it at least kept him at the front of peoples minds. It also got rid of another citizen who'd fingered Yaz and so had tangible evidence of innocence.

So where did that leave the neighbourhood with another lynching due? Von-Mises had been the obvious target the first night and One-Mitt doped anyone on Don Coatleone's payroll would have avoided being the first to accuse on the second day. Only after it became clear the citizens were doing their work for them were they likely to be seen to act - only after they could get lost in a crowd baying for the Austrian's blood. If Feverfew was out then that left Johnny Cube, Paleface, Johnny Biz, Bazmo and Stoatface. Stoatface had voted after the deal was done, so that left anyone of 4.

One-Mitt couldn't see any reason to be hinky of one more than the others though. Unless one of the gumshoes the Don had set to work could shed some light on the whole caper it would be another blind duck-shoot, although with better odds than before.

17:50 / 29.05.06

Feverfew stood at the edge of the wharf, looking down into the sea. Silently, he takes out an illicit bottle of whisky from his private stock, uncorks it, and takes a long drink before pouring the rest into the sea.

"Oh, Von Mises... I don't know why I suspected you. I feel stupid. And now, the mafia are trying to set me up, really bad. Maybe we needed an adventurer right now, but I don't think you did the right thing trying to identify yourself as Bulletproof to try to win the crowd over... That sort of thinking just gets the wrong kind of attention. Still, maybe I just misread you."

Feverfew tosses the bottle in once the pouring is done, and wanders, dejectedly, back to his stall.

18:28 / 29.05.06

Johnny B lurked at the back of The Blue Lotus like a bad voyage in a seaman's brain. His raw knuckles boasted alternating layers of brown paper and Stickum. His temper was rawer than his knuckles but there wasn't any treatment for that.
Von Mises innocent. Rising innocenter. Was that a word? He'd have to boost a dictionary once this was all over. Johnny hated his own stupidity in going along with the squares. Square thinking wasn't going to solve this. You can't catch the mob with another mob. You need a targeted strike.
And now Feverfew was in the frame. Or rather, frame-up. It was all too obvious. But there weren't any breadcrumbs leading back to anyone's cottage in particular. This time the lemon-eyed reptile princess wasn't going to drink a wooden tub-full of raspberry sasparilla by herself.
Damn, this opium is good stuff.

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