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Being able to give his daughter away at the wedding meant the entire world to him, and had my friend not asked him for his daughter's hand in marriage, he would have felt hurt and insulted and that would have caused problems for their relationship for years to come. He doesn't have much else going on for him, and, to be frank, rubbing his nose in the fact that they find his values outdated, offensive, and embarrassing would seem more than a little cruel, and there would certainly be an argument that that would be classist.
well truman, i would say that this is entirely the point of this thread... it isn't agreeing with the value systems of others, it is respecting them in the context they are held. do we tell four year olds that santa and the easter bilby are just figments of the commercial world's bloated imagination? no, we respect the naivety and the wonder at young minds forming their own [mis]conceptions about the planet they inhabit - and will inherit - and it is the same for the grizzled old biker dude. it means so much to him, that is recognised, so it is 'respect' that he was asked and that was beautifu;. thanks for the tale.
marriage, as a topic for consideration, seems to have many personal contexts and each individual decision about it should be prima facie respected. although, of course, we all should be open enough to at least discuss our beliefs, no? but that is mebbe for another thread... |
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