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Inappropriate Responses

 
  

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Mourne Kransky
05:27 / 11.07.05
Olulabelle is Toots? Then what has she done with the Maytals?
 
 
bjacques
06:47 / 11.07.05
By way of Boingboing.net, here's Warren Ellis's report of Londoners having a bit of fun with my well-meaning fellow citizens.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
21:23 / 19.07.05
I thought about starting a new thread for this, but that would probably just get ugly. Uglier. The Torygraph's music critic Neil McCormick has written a song in reaction to the London bombings, which will be released as a single. Yes, the money's going to charity, but does that really justify the following?

The song is addressed to our terrorist enemies, posed as a series of hard questions about why they would attack fellow human beings they have never met. It is called People I Don't Know Are Trying to Kill Me.

...It was something I had started writing months before, after reading headlines about the terrorist threat to London. I bashed it out in rough form on an acoustic guitar to my friend Bono one night and he became very animated.

"This is a song that needs to be heard now," he insisted. He even suggested that U2 might record it as a B-side. So finally, when I got back to London on Thursday night, I finished it. I picked up a guitar and verses just poured out. "And when I'm turned to dust, will Allah or Jesus claim me?/And will the God of love welcome up above those who would maim me?/Can't you hear the crying in the streets? Broken glass beneath your feet? Children and mothers weep to shame thee/I live in a world where people I don't know are trying to kill me."
 
 
Char Aina
22:36 / 19.07.05
wow.
that takes... something else.
 
 
Spatula Clarke
22:42 / 19.07.05
"This is a song that needs to be heard now," he insisted. He even suggested that U2 might record it as a B-side.

Spot the deliberate mistake.
 
 
Whisky Priestess
22:49 / 19.07.05
I really think the use of "thee" for the sake of rhyming the third line is entirely justified. "Me" is a very difficult word to rhyme, after all ...
 
 
Tryphena Absent
22:58 / 19.07.05
Let's just be thankful he didn't rhyme it with a variation on 'do you see.'
 
 
paranoidwriter waves hello
23:07 / 19.07.05
I think it's beautiful.
 
 
Bed Head
12:24 / 20.07.05
Eek. ‘People I Don’t Know Are Trying To Kill Me’ - is that supposed to be a Morrisseyesque title or what?

This struck me as the *oddest* response yet, more proof that right-wing internet nutters are deeply strange people. To have, as a response to bombs going off in London, the immediate urge to address the Doctor Who fans of the world and attempt to rally them against, uh, ‘the international left-wing conspiracy’... well, that’s a teensy bit inappropriate, I’d say.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
12:29 / 20.07.05
Mind you, you can see why Bono would like it...
 
 
Whisky Priestess
12:48 / 20.07.05
It's all in the tune, really. Song lyrics often look inane and flat when stripped of the music, which usually does most (more likely all, in this case) of the emotional work.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
12:53 / 20.07.05
To have, as a response to bombs going off in London, the immediate urge to address the Doctor Who fans of the world and attempt to rally them against, uh, ‘the international left-wing conspiracy’...

Are you implying that there's something odd about the idea that a left-wing pinko media conspiracy would deliberately prevent a red-blooded right-thinking right-winger like Russell T Davies from spreading his messages of support for the COALITION???
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
14:57 / 20.07.05
It works to the tune of:

"Some folks'll never eat eat a skunk
But then again some folk'll
Like cletus the slack jawed yokel".
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
14:58 / 20.07.05
And it would've been better to use the words "folks that" instead of "people". Y'know, for the Bushism.
 
 
■
11:51 / 21.07.05
Shit, first Absolute Power changes episodes after the first bombings, meaning our TV reviewer was going to try and knock out a quick review of Nigella. Now this fucks that up, too. Gonna be a long afternoon.
 
 
grant
13:38 / 21.07.05
Listening to the news this morning, it struck me that they're going to have to amend the rules....
 
 
Char Aina
13:50 / 21.07.05
are you prepared?
have you seen the preparing for emergencies site?
get ready to duck and cover.
 
 
Ex
14:11 / 21.07.05
People I Don't Know Are Trying to Kill Me

MeatLoaf-style Subtitle: ....And People Who Have Known Me For Years Are Telling Them Where I Live.

And the B-side - People Whose Names I Can't Pronounce From A Country I've Never Heard of Have Written To Me To Call Me A Wanker.
 
 
Not Here Still
14:20 / 21.07.05
Had a wry smile when looking at the Google ads before logging into the Explosions on the Underground thread.

One was offering "Jobs on the London Underground" while the other offered a game which centred on making your way round the underground...
 
 
paranoidwriter waves hello
14:22 / 21.07.05
Cheers toksik. Remember "Protect and Survive"?

"Bavarian Fire Drill! Bavarian Fire Drill! Everybody out of your cars and get in line!"
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
14:23 / 21.07.05
Eek. ‘People I Don’t Know Are Trying To Kill Me’ - is that supposed to be a Morrisseyesque title or what?

You're the one for me, fatwah?
 
 
Our Lady Has Left the Building
14:47 / 21.07.05
Explosions on the tube? That's so last fortnight darling...
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
14:49 / 21.07.05
Why do these things have to happen when I have so much WORK to do?
 
 
Our Lady Has Left the Building
15:36 / 21.07.05
Are we sure it's Muslim extremists? It's interesting how each attack is done at exactly the right time for people to take a three-day weekend...
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
16:37 / 21.07.05
How's about "People I don't know are trying to kill me, and at least one guy who I don't know would add himself to that list if he could be arsed; at the very least, he definitely thinks I'm a tosser and has told people on a message board as much?"

I need my moment of fame, dammit.
 
 
Ex
17:01 / 21.07.05
Yes! Stoatie I Don't Know is Trying to Punch Me.
 
 
Poke it with a stick
20:47 / 21.07.05
Typical English attempt to relive past achievements, isn't it? Cue news programmes rushing to show clips of 07'07 and wax lyrical about "two World Wars and one terrorist attack."
 
 
Evil Scientist
07:27 / 22.07.05
Regarding yesterday's botched attacks.

I think the Queen should do a public announcement on the beeb. She can stand there all regal.

"This message is intended for those terrible people who were responsible for Thursday's attacks."

Then her face contorts, and in the best football hooligan growl:

"Yaaaaaaaargh, you're shit!"
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
07:56 / 22.07.05
Yes, because nobody's sick and tired of TEH BULLDOGG*!!!

(*Teh Bulldogg created by Warren Ellis and Steve Dillon.)
 
 
Evil Scientist
08:39 / 22.07.05
That's right. Let's just go with the fear and panic vibe instead.

Personally I prefer a combination of "Come and have a go..." attitude and contempt for the fuckwits that were forced to run off like Benny Hill with smoke pouring out of their rucksacks.

They're morons, and as such deserve to be laughed at.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
08:52 / 22.07.05
That's right. Let's just go with the fear and panic vibe instead.

I would respectfully suggest that there may be more than two options, but whatever, it's a thread for inappropriate responses, feel free to be as Hoskins as you like.
 
 
Evil Scientist
08:56 / 22.07.05
Sorry if those last two posts come across as a little "mindless-bulldog-patriotism"-heavy. I'm just venting spleen.

Picking up my paper this morning and was confronted with a ton of headlines reading "City of fear", and similar. It just pisses me off that, after the actual bombings everyone was just getting on with it. Now, after a bunch of idiots cock up their attempt, we've all got to be terrified.

I'll just move over to the Anger thread and vent there.
 
 
Hattie's Kitchen
09:00 / 22.07.05
This would make a great Hamlet cigar commercial.

Shifty guy on crowded tube fiddling with his rucksack, reaches for the detonator and awaits an almighty explosion...and bugger all happens. He opens his eyes, realises he's not dead, sighs heavily, then reaches for a Hamlet cigar...then the music starts - dum, dum, dum, dum, dee dee dee...
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
11:38 / 23.07.05
Don't talk crazy. You're not allowed to smoke on the Tube.

It's horrible and wrong, I know, but after being reminded of the Nick Berg fiasco on Barbelith last night, I have this urge to post:

Deal with it. The guy got shot in the head five times in the name of art, more bottle than any of us combined. I'm not saying like it, i'm just saying : Don't give the Police a load of shit just because it offends you.
 
 
MJ-12
01:46 / 24.07.05
"Hmmn. i bet airfare to London will be coming down."
 
  

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