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Underground > Comic Books >

J.L.A. Classified

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20:52 / 26.01.05

Wow what a finish. Each JLA member shines in a mini-chapter that consists of what 2-3 pages each... with panels dispursted throughout.

Art: A+

classic GM Iterations.

the end is the begining indeed.

Professor Silly

21:27 / 26.01.05

Best line: Superman's "These 'no-nonsense' solutions of yours just don't hold water in a complex world of jet-powered apes and time travel."

Kick Ass!!!

21:54 / 26.01.05

talk about supercompressed. wheeeee!

high points:

- Gorilla Grodd gets caught monologuing. monologuing about eating Batman, to boot.

- speaking of Grodd monologuing, i LOVED his whole bit about the JLA being turned into primordial monster myths used to scare gorilla children. all the Olympian stuff of GM's JLA turned on its head or taken out to the next iteration. excellent.

- in addition to Superman's instant classic line cited above, this exchange just killed me:

"My team was operating under the control of mystery cosmic neuro-parasites."
"Talk like that's sure to impress the judge, big fella."

- i loved the Qwewq-becoming-Neh-Buh-Loh deal and the Ultramarines becoming Qwewq's first superheroes.

i love all the multiple successions of worlds and such. i love the way GM is able to balance total immersion in the craziest superheroic lunacy and create a believeable world of jet-powered apes and time travel without making any of the cool stuff any less cool. how does he do that? how does he make the wondrous commonplace without losing the wonder, damn him?

22:18 / 26.01.05

I liked a lot of this one. "Send your world's finest," with Superman charging in. Aquaman, well, kicking ass (and taking care of ol' water-based Glob in, what? One panel? I love the little things that just seem thrown in). Disembodied pilot Scott Sawyer. Wonder Woman kicking ass, complete with The Invisible Plane! Batman's little grin at the end... Hell, he even threw in Tasmanian Devil, for cripes' sake. It was a good issue.

I like the infant/adult universe stuff, the foreshadowing to Seven Soldiers, and the Ultramarines being given their own little "ultimate" universe to protect. Hell, I want an Ultramarines series. With Morrison and McGuiness, preferably...

Next: Giffen/DeMatteis!

22:56 / 26.01.05

Grodd gets nutted by batman!!

' there goes the dynasty '

ACE!

00:13 / 27.01.05

Best Lines ever

I've killed Apes before...

There goes my Dynasty....

...Time Traveling Bully...

Not a quote but a cool scene
Doing penance in a place called Qwewq

Apes in the Phantom Zone what a concept

Jake, Colossus of Clout

03:23 / 27.01.05

"Quite frankly, as an alternative to some of the punishments we've had to devise over the years-- Execution's a walk in the park." Excellent. Just because Supes and company don't punch people's brains out doesn't mean they're soft on the dirtbags. A nice answer to "realistic" Authority-style comics. And on the next page, Grant sets the Ultramarines up as an Authority-style team. Hmm.

Neh-Buh-Loh is creepy, but those little elfy mind-control guys are kind of... ridiculous? And not ridiculous-cool, like Batman roasting on a spit, but ridiculous-lame. I dunno. I'm sure we'll see more of them in Seven Soldiers, but those little dudes were the only lame part of an otherwise stellar story. About as intimidating as the Mini-Ashes in Army of Darkness. That's a minor quibble, though.

Wonder Woman kicked so much ass in this issue. It was great. "I've heard that about you, Arthur." Hi-larious. Very little GL, but since it was lame-o John Stewart, (I can't write that without thinking "Daily Show") I could care less. Grant was so great with Kyle during his JLA run that his absence was very noticable to me. Aquaman was great, too. I love me some Aquaman. "You hurt J'onn? That was stupid."

Loved it. Want more Grant JLA.

BrianFitzgerald

04:13 / 27.01.05

"Superbia's DOWN!"
"Tidal wave off the Rock of Gibraltar!"
Flash: "Yeah, got it."

Oh my, this was fun. One question, though. On the penultimate page, as Superman is lecturing the Ultramarines, there's a panel that looks like a close-up of someone's costume, with a tear/bullethole exposing some metal. Am I missing something here? What/who is this?

Jake, Colossus of Clout

04:43 / 27.01.05

I was wondering about that, too. I think it's Warmaker's costume, but I'm not sure.

09:39 / 27.01.05

I don't think the Ultramarines were being sent into an "Ultimate" universe. Qwewq is pretty clearly our universe.

10:18 / 27.01.05

So where are the Ultramarines?

13:07 / 27.01.05

Geraldo has been talking about trying to extract someone from a comic book for years now. Maybe this is his latest attempt.

13:58 / 27.01.05

>>>there's a panel that looks like a close-up of someone's costume, with a tear/bullethole exposing some metal. Am I missing something here? What/who is this?<<<

It's Warmaker. I don't know what the significance of the rip in the costume is, though, or why it justified a close-up.

>>>I don't think the Ultramarines were being sent into an "Ultimate" universe. Qwewq is pretty clearly our universe.<<<

Well, inasmuch as it's a world without superheroes. But I think the last page with its images of grim "realistic" horror - Drug abuse! Terrorists! Wife beating! WAR! - is clearly a comment on the Ultimates/Authority style of superhero comics, as is Superman's condemnation of the Ultramarines "no-nonsense solutions (that) hold no water in this complex world of jet-powered apes and time travel."

What a brilliant comic. Hands down the best superhero comic I have read in, oh, a year or more?

Haus of Mystery

14:18 / 27.01.05

I really liked the sorry looking apes. Naughty monkeys. Nice to see Tasmanian Devil and some other Global Guardians get the Grant treatment. Wonder Woman going to town was also great - like the dominatrix theme.

Wheeeeee. The Ultramarines are coming.

miss wonderstarr

15:14 / 27.01.05

Devil's advocate: a fun supercompressed comic, sure, and as such a merry ten minutes. In plot and character terms, though, I don't see anything here I wasn't getting in Morrison's old JLA. Spiffy new enemies turn up in #1, complications and first engagements in #2, and #3 is basically a festival of the heroes kicking ass in groovy, inventive ways -- Silver Age pseudoscience about speeding-up molecules, fire-damaged shapeshifting, aqueous telepathy.

Nobody can deny there aren't lines to treasure, delivered with deadpan campiness; neat echoes of the sci-fi Fifties; inventive methods of villainy and heroism.

But it's bubblegum stuff really, isn't it. It's like a decent roller-coaster; five minutes of thrills, come off it mildly reeling, share a few great moments with your pals, but there's not much inclination to go through it a second time.

15:44 / 27.01.05

Basically a festival of the heroes kicking ass in groovy, inventive ways

Yeah, I'd have to go along with that. There really weren't all that many surprises were there ? As with George's original run on the JLA, it seemed to be the opening stages and supporting characters that largely held the interest, with the story flagging a bit once the big hitters rode in to save the day. Am I alone in finding the Flash etc, however well they're written, just essentially a bit dull ?

Not that I didn't enjoy it, mind you.

miss wonderstarr

15:54 / 27.01.05

And really, dropping Beryl and Cyril into bit-part roles like that, just to bring up the big guns doing their usual thing (Flash magics up some vibration nonsense, Aquaman is a tougher guy than anyone expects, Superman bashes the main villain, J'Onn and the others do some tag-team telepathy "come in, Diana"/"I'm on it, old friend") is an incredible waste. Those third-stringers were made to seem fresh and interesting in #1. The JLA are Sat-morning kidz stuff on rerun.

Jake, Colossus of Clout

17:05 / 27.01.05

It IS the JLA's book, guys. They had to get the spotlight sometime, considering they were barely in the first two issues. I think you're overreacting to the lack of attention to the bench-warmer heroes in this issue. A lot of people would have been pissed off at a three-issue JLA storyline that was strictly about the Ultramarines (how many non-Grant fans even remember them, anyway?). Grant and DC had to know that, as well.

17:14 / 27.01.05

Spoilers

Yes, all that interesting stuff ( well one line actually, but still... ) about Cyril's booze and drug addictions, brought on perhaps by 'taking over the company' issues with the original Knight, or maybe frustration at his perceived inability to live up to the example of his lifelong hero, and then there was the coma, and the question of how he met Beryl, the girl from the wrong side of the tracks or whatever the line was in the first place, all of it just thuh-rown away... I realise George can't write everything one would like him to, but it seems a shame that he couldn't have found a bit more space for some of the more promising tangents thrown up here.

Then again, I suppose this does bode well for 'Seven Soldiers,' no Justice League A-list to be seen anywhere near there, it seems.

Though I still think Cyril and Beryl might have been a bit more fun than say, Mr Miracle or The Bulleteer.

20:47 / 27.01.05

Hey, don't diss Mr. Miracle. That's probably the one I'm looking forward to most, as Miracle has a wonderfully wild and Kirbyan premise, that he's a "super escape artist." I want to see what Goraiko Morrison does with it.

As for the Ultramarines ending up on the sidelines this issue, well, that's kinda the point. In the world of the Justice League, they can only hope to be second-stringers... which is why they get their own world to protect at the end. I'd be interested to see what they do with the place, but I wonder if they'll ever be revisited...

There's a lot to love about this little JLA arc, though, and I'm sure to be rereading it again and again in the future. It's pure comics joy, and I'm quite happy with it... a well-spent nine dollars.

22:25 / 27.01.05

That panel of superman speeding towards neh-buh-loh after the huntsman says; "Send your worlds finest to me" is the superman i want to see in All star. Frightening, passionate, and almost vengful. That page almost took my breath away.

miss wonderstarr

22:35 / 27.01.05

Yes, all that interesting stuff ( well one line actually, but still... ) about Cyril's booze and drug addictions

Re. the thread about whether comic book writing is inferior to cinema or TV, that Squire dialogue was appallingly clumsy shoehorned exposition. I don't have the book in front of me but it is very much along the lines of "yer can't fight Batman, he's yer bloody hero! Yer have to resist it, Cyril... like yer kicked the drugs an booze!"

Admittedly this is something of an exaggeration but the cockney-sparrer accent was crudely done in this issue, and the stuff Morrison put in Beryl's mouth just is not the kind of thing a person would naturally shout to their long-term friend and colleague in a moment of crisis. It is the sort of thing a writer wedges in to tell the readers some information about character.

uncle retrospective

23:33 / 27.01.05

So the Ultramarine corps go into the baby universe Qwewq which becomes the Nebula man when it grows up. Is the close up of Warmaker's uniform a clue to the fact Scott has been seeded with the infecting evil that turns the universe?
That has to be the weirdest thing I've ever typed. God I love Grant's JLA.

23:36 / 27.01.05

How similar you are, Kovacs, to Loki in teh Sandman, how quickly you turn on your allies.

The Squire had all of one and half balloons in this issue, throughout which the pony-tailed scamp ( apart from saying 'gotta' for which I agree she deserved to be sent to that dodgy micro-universe forever, ) seemed happy enough to express herself in received BBC English, with regional touches, if you like. The Squire's dialogue seemed free-floating enough that if she'd expressed herself with a Scottish, North English, Cornish, Apples'n'Pears or Welsh, heaven forfend, accent, it would have been much the same. And if you don't believe me, read out the Squire's lines to someone very close to you as a Welshman, an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman, and see which seems best.

And then post the results on here, pretty clearly

00:40 / 28.01.05

I was thinking about posting my thoughts on this issue but Kovacs beat me to it. I do feel I should've just read my friend's copies instead of buying all three.

I completely agree, I read it right after We3 in a waiting room and suddenly wished for a longer We3 or more Seaguy.

11:22 / 28.01.05

Was that mozzer himself trying to loot the TV store at the start and who ended up squished by gorailo?
I NEED more Ultramarines, they're in DCone million right?
Have they appeared anywhere else , andn more importantly , was it any good?

Haus of Mystery

11:27 / 28.01.05

They seem to have been completely ignored by other writers, as always seems to be the case with Morrison's creations.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

12:33 / 28.01.05

I, too, read it straight after WE3, but thought that was perfect timing. It was just what was needed. Some good, messy (in a good way), shiny superhero fun.

I assumed it was our world- "a world WITHOUT superheroes" (oops... just put "superherpes" instead but caught it just in time).

Superman's entire speech on the penultimate page was just comic genius... I loved every word.

How anyone (well, okay, one guy, but he said it fairly loudly) could ever accuse GM of not loving the Silver Age is beyond me.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

12:34 / 28.01.05

"caught MYSELF" just in time was what I meant to say...

Haus of Mystery

14:02 / 28.01.05

Are you saying our world's infected by Superherpes?

The Natural Way

14:24 / 28.01.05

"She's moving too fast!"

Wonderwoman kicks fucking ass. Yes!

16:53 / 28.01.05

the always-hinted at romantic tension between the two royal members of the JLA, nice to see that again with Arthur & Diana...

>> Was that mozzer himself trying to loot the TV store at the start and who ended up squished by gorailo?

Not if Mozz wants to end up squished by a falling piano in real life....hyperisigls, doncha know

I thought this was a lot of fun -- it felt a little more simplistic and 'pat' and perhaps a tiny bit rushed to me than Grant's other JLA stuff, but I loved it. Gotta read it again...

16:55 / 28.01.05

also, it's cool that Grant referenced the old JLA villain Nebula Man in the actual story (previously he only mentioned this inspiration in interviews about the story arc)...

00:45 / 29.01.05

Squire is defo a 'cockney sparrer' to my mind. I dunno, if you read a phonetic Eastenders script it'd probably not look much more better; arguments over the 'realism' of her dialogue herein seem rather beside the point.

It was all very lightweight, in a sense, much as I'd like to see the Knight whizzing past my window here in the infant universe of Qwewq with mini-spitfires in tow. Yeah, I'll believe in your sentient universes then, Grant.

I liked the 'few bananas' line slightly more than Superman's other summary line, I think.

13:04 / 30.01.05

MOONS OF MARS! IT HAS NO MIND!

This was rocking on toast.

Fave bits: J'onn crawling out of the lava ("Die alone, and far from home") in hellish parody of the evolutionary chart. First protoplasm, then a fungal node, then that Lovecraftian Innsmouth fish-frog form. Fucking top.

The invisible plane. Disembodied hero Scott Sawyer (>snuff< I thought I SMELLED something). Grodd basting Baman like a turkey.

The Ultramarines on the last page, wearing 'undercover' outfits - hoodies and such like - even though one of them is a seven foot tall warbot. Faintly ridiculous.

What did Aquaman and Goraiko Operator Number 10 talk about? Look a chibi-Goraiko!

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