In a spirit of phallic reclamation ("You'll regret this" - ZoCher) I've decided to start a specifically penile thread. Clitorises ('clitori'?) be damned!
Okay, so mine is a marvel of modern engineering. It's apparently high-average, at just over seven-and-a-half inches - but I'm the only person, male or female, who's ever actually been bothered to measure it. Uncut (standard for these non-US shores) with a foreskin that's just a little too tight (when I was younger, I'd get terribly anxious at the prospect of it suddenly splitting, or retracting and staying retracted, or the wind changing...). While I hardly consider it a thing of wondrous aesthetic beauty, it's hardly a source of shame, particularly; I have no problems with waving it around in public, and rarely become shy in public lavatories.
I'm told that men often give their penises pet names: mine remains unchristened. Once, when pushed (by a woman) to give it a name, I referred to it as 'Fireman Sam' (impressive hood) but felt vaguely silly.
It's occasionally somewhat thrawn in terms of turgidity (stays 'innocently' flaccid when I'd like to be filling my jeans, gets stiff at inopportune moments - typically rather dull morning meetings) but generally does the job in terms of orgasm. ZoCher's very good with it but, all things considered, no-one manages it quite as well as I do.
I've lost count of the number of times I pat it, cup it, stroke it, scratch it, every day. It's just reassuring, somehow, to know it's there. I'm not sure how I'd get by without my penis.
Tell me about yours... |
