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Underground > Creation >

Daily Poetry

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16:24 / 31.01.02

Day 46, Jan. 31, 2002

reaching down into my depths
pulling out all the hatred

dare I empty myself of this?
what would be left to fill the hole?
what would I dare put into such
a stinking place?
nothing, for fear it would die

so to empty myself of hate
is to make myself hollow

I can feel the hate
swishing around inside, nauseating
anger boiling up around it
where in this mass
is love?

I will not be hollow
I will love
and pour this hatred from me

The Apple-Picker

18:14 / 31.01.02

I ate Twix
and my belly aches--
eat apples.

18:17 / 31.01.02

(pssst - I love apple with a large chunk of my heart)

The Apple-Picker

18:19 / 31.01.02

Touch the nape,
cleave me on striped sheets
before noon.

The Apple-Picker

18:20 / 31.01.02

Yay! I'm loved chunks and chunks! Ew.

I love you to the very core.

14:48 / 04.02.02

I love apple to the sloppy, juicy ending

(cant let this thread die)

20:32 / 06.02.02

outside the box

Just live
time and tide, flux and flow
be damned
do not bow to pressure
though your bones creak in protest
dance to your own drummer
follow your own path
take the road less travelled

shun cliches
just live.

sexual melody

sweet sighs of seduction
bold beads on bodies
napes nibbled
tongues tickling on teeth
giggles growing to groans
(let's do it again, my love,
let's do it again)

20:43 / 06.02.02

she closes her eyes
as she puts down the phone
whispers "I love you"
as the receiver clicks down
the glow from the numbers
burns patterns on her eyes
dark eyes
she misses him

This is how
i wished it happened
but i will never know
i will never ask.

14:59 / 07.02.02

so much to say
so little time to say it
80 years? maybe
how can i tell you everything
in so short a space of time
maybe i'll come around again
but by then i'll have forgotten
and have to start at the beginning again
i have so much to say
thoughts that bubble full-formed
into my mouth
or are birthed with agony
a scream from my throat
but so many, so much
and so little time.

17:41 / 07.02.02

the inevitable confusion surfaces again
bringing with it every option under the sun
and my mind, once so sharp
blanks, balks, wishing it all away
i see a sunny beach
i see us there, all of us
walking
little ones playing
it is away, from all this
it is away and happy
but a fantasy
how was the heart constructed
to accept such dichotomy
or how was mine constructed?

14:48 / 09.02.02

infidels
that's what you are
keep your filthy hands
off my dessert
i've no use for you
you've no place in my world
infidels
bastards hypocrites and liars
keep away from me
keep the hell away.

[ 09-02-2002: Message edited by: pretty hate machine ]

We're The Great Old Ones Now

15:30 / 09.02.02

Poetry is fashion's bitch.
Iconic canon whore,
Born in Marseilles; 'Contessa' and 'Seigneur' to believers,
As they remove their literary trousers.

Drab delivery, beaten by a metaphoric switch;
Dressed up or naked words strutting in new finery,
Maison D'Empreur, you know,
Gossipped Mrs. Eliot.

Looking in the mirror,
No recognition, just lines.

14:10 / 10.02.02

I poisoned myself today
Please, don't run to my aid
It's a slow poison
But fatal nonetheless
There is no cure
Nothing that will stop the pain
But it's a slow poison
And I'll get used to it
You'd be surprised
You may have taken it too
And one day you'll notice
That slowly, it's killing you
I hope you do
And what will death be like?
Beautiful
Glorious
and slow.

01:28 / 12.02.02

(Just couldn't stay away)

was it an empty promise?
i really couldn't say
it never felt like one
does it come across that way?
i try to live up to it
each and every day
but sometimes it feels empty
and i wish it would go away.

zoom.

01:58 / 12.02.02

unsettled bouquet
you rock gently back and forth
like a pendulum
signalling my doom
with beauty

18:32 / 12.02.02

sweetness
and light
and everything

12:57 / 13.02.02

why
does it hurt so very much?
why
do I feel like I'm the only one who feels it?
why
do my thoughts betray my emotions?
why
does it never leave my thoughts?
why

(feel like I'm slipping back into adolescence here

)

13:02 / 14.02.02

are you busy, my love?
lend me one moment
I've a secret to tell
a nothing to whisper
in your ear
come closer
I don't want anyone to know
what I've to say is for you
and you alone
it's only a secret
a small empty thing
whose meaning is made
by the listener alone
but it's for you
and I'll pass it
from my lips to your mind
to hold with you always
this secret

15:54 / 14.02.02

Feb. 14, 2002

make yourself up
apply on the outside what is inside already
and prepare, my love, for the feast
of St. Valentine
the cultured dinner that will degenerate
into the savage feeding
that's why we're there, after all
forks will be dropped to the floor
and teeth will sink into
the meat of your heart
once the wine has been finished
our sex will be licked
to slake the thirst of the revelers
passing the innards around the table
and hungry without ending
swallowing whole the desires and lusts
of whoever is sitting next to you
dropping on all fours
and offering yourself as the main course
this orgy, this bacchanal
violence without blood
spiritually eviscerated
and spread and entered more deeply
than is possible
prepare, my love
I want you.

[ 14-02-2002: Message edited by: Captain Zoom ]

12:03 / 15.02.02

what do you think it would take
for us to be innocent again?
to not have hurt so much
the ones we love
to greet each day not wondering
what was going to go wrong
to smile and to cry
in happiness

13:53 / 16.02.02

the boy reaches down
into his dirty black places
and pulls out a handful of clay
passes it to you
and asks you to shape him a heart
which seems to you impossible
maybe more improbable
but you try
as the boy watches, his chest gaping
oozing more clay
that he will ask you shape a soul
and a mind from
and you look at the mass in your hand
and it looks like a heart
and it starts to beat
but it is not a heart
it is a lump of clay
torn from the dirty places
in the boy who does not exist.

14:49 / 27.02.02

and in the end
the sadness trickles out
not a rampant flow
but a slow and chronic wound
and I realize
all the things I wanted to say
were all the things I did

18:03 / 01.03.02

every
thing
is
crumble
ing
and when
I sing
I'm
tremble
ing

wembley can change in 28 days

09:40 / 02.03.02

(Not mine, but just because I'm dreadfully ill

Haiku!
Gesundheit.

[ 02-03-2002: Message edited by: wembley ]

14:19 / 02.03.02

hahahahahahahaha!

Zoom.

17:12 / 02.03.02

(inspired by the title of a book I just found in my back room)

for time and all eternity
for the chance to get it right
to live to see your children's children
have children
to be alive when the next revolution
changes the world
for the minutes you've already lost
and the hours you wished would have lasted
what would you pay?

I have a collection of frozen moments
a time capsule of treasured thoughts
when someone whispered "I wish this could last forvever"
and it does, at least in part
I see them (the comet, the look, the love)
like I saw them then, an ache in my chest
I have them, but will never have them again

What would you pay? To have just that moment back?

20:06 / 04.03.02

Tangled
Roots
Extract
Essence

20:12 / 04.03.02

friends in corners

take it to a whole new level gonna make it gonna take it feel your secret waves of thought connect to friends in corners they get it gonna make this gonna create this can you feel this where were you when it all came down did you realize it was just my idea of an inside joke they get it take it to a whole new level understand you wear a mask like all the rest but can't survive this social set alone you walk to guide us to unite this isn't real this isn't fake take it to a whole new level see the candy man without his treats he needs a drink he needs a toke he needs a smoke you got some coke we won't allow this train of thought its tracks are used cliched and bought and sold to highest bidders competition plays like tennis balls without the female groaning sounds we're gonna make it gonna take it take it to a whole new level this wasn't meant for you to see this wasn't meant for you to know but man those cretins must let go your secret waves of thought connect to friends you say but we just met this isn't real this isn't fake we choose to choose to be this way but what is this and what is that and what is sane and what are we and who are they and can you see this did you hear that song about that song about that song about my cousin cause she told me you were just a test she passed you long ago she sits in corners with her friends and laughs at those like you she gets it they get it take it to a whole new level now the roles have been reversed cause all your lines she just rehearsed she's been there gonna make it gonna take it feel it fake it break it why are you sad don't you see she once was you and don't you see you get it and you'll get there and you'll find it and you'll taste it feel it break it remake it forsake it awake it dreams you into codes but can you feel it can you see it can you take it take it to a whole new level feel your secret waves of thought connect to friends in corners now you see and now you know and now you get it they get it

22:32 / 05.03.02

don't look at me
i have brought you so low
i cannot bear this shame
leave me without identity
it is more than i deserve
a faceless nameless thing
will be my fate

(but the dream ends
and i'm lying in bed
the glow from the street
illuminates your face
and i sit up
glance at you again
make sure this is real
unsure briefly where
i was

or where i wanted to be.)

09:01 / 07.03.02

(goin' back daily, goddamnit!)

I stared at you for hours
Though the hours turned out to be
A minute or so, I really don't know
Lost in the depths of your eyes
And for hours I felt that I sat
Not moving or saying a word
But it wasn't so long and I came off wrong
You asked me what was the matter
For hours I grasped for an answer
Well, for minutes, maybe even less
Words that you sought, I thought that I ought
To say what exactly was needed
But the words come out so clumsy
Never quite meeting their promise
You know that it's true, and that I do
Let's leave it at that for now.

16:30 / 07.03.02

the antithesis looks sullenly at me
shaking his head in disappointment
"you were supposed to be the one
who would lead them from childhood,
but look at you"
and I look and my potential is
leaking out around my ankles
spilling slowly from every orifice
"you could have been the one
who would lead them into glory
but look at what you've done"
and I look and see my life laid out
beginning to end and I am proud
I become the thesis and he vanishes.

22:48 / 08.03.02

I dare you
No, I double dare you
to tell me the darkest
thing you've ever thought
The one thing
you've never told anyone
ever
the thing that makes
you sick to be alive
tell me, I'll keep it
secret, I will
unless you betray me
and then I'll tell
everyone
And you'll never
be able to show your face
around here no more
oh no.

16:45 / 09.03.02

she rubs her cold hands
rubs them on my back
and they spark and ingnite
lighting my spine aflame
and it's like a shock to the brain
i think in new ways
with a fire in my head
and tinder for a spine
ashes of my old thoughts
float out through the window
and i realize why her hands are cold

18:28 / 10.03.02

One day I was walking
along the shore road
When hopping along
there came a great toad
It sat in the lane
and it looked up at me
And I wondered aloud
"What is it you see?
Do you know what I am
A human, a man
Or am I unknowable
In your life's short span?"
But it offered no answer
it just hopped away
So I continued along
the shore road that day.

20:23 / 11.03.02

it rolls in waves
sounds, almost painful
melodic to an idiot
but pleasing nonetheless
not quite devolving
into white noise
like a thunder storm
crescendo after crescendo
an orgasm that will not end
until you can't take anymore
and it still won't end
blanking out
eveything else, all your
concentration
and it just keeps going
assaulting you ears
with a noise supreme
but now fading
to nothing.

(written while listening to Sianspheric's "Audiophone")

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