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I have to come back to this thread today because of ongoing meatspace experiences that won't let me forget about this issue.
I think most people wouldnt say anything about anything so personal as weight unless they were acting upon something they knew as fact...like the person only ate when they were with people and even then didnt eat a lot or were displaying behaviour which correlated with some kind of eating problem.(crimson)
I think the fat=bad thing is more commonly encountered than the thin=bad thing. Kids don't get teased in playgrounds for being thin very often, teenagers don't often laugh at each other for being thin, people dont jump to insults based on weight for skinny people in the same way.
Not to say these things don't happen, of course, but in my experience larger people get more grief about their weight. I'm a skinny guy, and if someone saw an empty chocolate wrapper on my desk they probably wouldn't comment. (Quantum)
Crimson - would if that were true. If that has been your experience than I envy you. And Quantum, I would suggest that the lack of harrassment you're seeing about your body or eating habits may be because you are male. Let me tell you what things look like from my perspective:
Yesterday my client, just being friendly and chatting, was talking about Tammy Faye Bakker's last appearance on TV in which she was 65 lbs and at death's door. My client added, "of course, if you lost 5 more pounds you'd look a lot like her!" Ha ha. Today this client again remarked on me being the size of a "Christmas ornament" among other odd, small objects. Then a colleague came to meet with us and immediately asked if I had eaten anything while I was out of town (for 2 months). When I explained about going vegetarian blah blah, she asked, "do you eat chocolate?" I told her yeah of course and she said derisively "no of course you don't, with a butt like that you're not eating any chocolate."
These kinds of comments, especially coming in a work environment, feel very invasive to me. Unfortunately they're not uncommon in my experience. It's hard to me to comprehend why these things are okay to say to anyone. And it's very difficult, in the moment, to know how to respond. Usually a frozen smile is the best I can do.
I suspect there is an unfair assumption made that thin people are immune to critiques on our bodies because we must just be so happy with our bodies that insults bounce off our giant inflated senses of self-satisfaction. Critique of one's appearance doesn't hurt because it's true or untrue - it hurts because it transgresses personal boundaries.
I would hope that people with a naturally low BMI wouldnt feel victimised for being thin. I think there is a world of difference between people who are naturally thin and people who systematically deny themselves the calories they need.
I think what is implied by this is a commonly attitude that the only thin people who get a pass from criticism are those skinny people who eat burgers and fries every day and just can't help being thin - they're "naturally" thin. Kind of like the only overweight people who get that pass are the ones who diet and exercise all the time and can't help being overweight - they're "naturally" fat. But I think those people are the exception and not the rule in both cases. By extension, that attitude - rather bizarrely, I think - says thin people who watch what they eat are bad and by definition have eating disorders. Everyone should watch what they eat. Humans are opportunistic omnivores, and with food being as plentiful as it is in Western culture, we *must* use our brains to regulate our eating habits. The idea that people need to be able to eat fast food and cheesecake and soda and still be at a normal healthy weight is an irrational, self-defeating concept wholly invented by corporations selling us fast food and cheesecake and soda (and treadmills and diet pills etc).
I'm maybe a little overly passionate about this whole subject because I'm very passionate about nutrition, and it so happens that I'm currently tasked with creating and maintaining a meal plan for my inlaws, who have practically every disease and health problem related to poor eating habits that it's possible to have - diabetes, heart disease, blindness, neuropathy, kidney disease, insomnia, fatigue, depression - hell, you name it. (Incidentally, one is overweight and one is not but they are both very ill.) For me to be so fanatical about nutrition and be under this onslaught of derogatory remarks about the way my body looks - because I'm thinner than average, and average is overweight, basically - is just too ironic to bear. |
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