It's LATE! Is there a Doctor in the house? I don't care if it isn't his SHIFT!

23:57 / 08.04.06

It would seem things are very RAAAAAR! for some strange reason.

No complaints so far.

23:58 / 08.04.06

And you call yourself a pirate?

00:00 / 09.04.06

Yar.

00:00 / 09.04.06

*looks at dessert wine*

I don't know what I am...

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

00:01 / 09.04.06

Arrrr.

OH yar.

00:02 / 09.04.06

Grr. I'm at work, and regretting the fact that I went to the pub for a few swift pints this afternoon.

00:02 / 09.04.06

Which is better:

A) Treasure
or
B) Inconsequential crap.

If you answered A, You might be a Pirate

00:05 / 09.04.06

I got Resident Evil 4 the other day.

I'm more convinced than ever that every videogame library needs at least one up-to-date title that allows you to explode heads with shotguns.

00:05 / 09.04.06

I need more booze

00:06 / 09.04.06

Ah, Resident Evil 4. Those were the days.

00:07 / 09.04.06

I don't understand "a few swift pints" and especially "this afternoon".

00:08 / 09.04.06

If you answered

C) Gold

you are a Dwarf written by Terry Pratchett. Apologies.

Tryphena Absent

00:11 / 09.04.06

hhhhheeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllooooooooooooooo. Bringing the pringles to the Late Shift I observe. What is better:

a) cheese

b) champagne.

If you answered b) champagne you are a character from Dynasty. The 1980's soap opera starring that woman.

00:13 / 09.04.06

And what's wrong with Terry Pratchett?

00:13 / 09.04.06

His hat, for starters.

00:14 / 09.04.06

a) cheese.

00:15 / 09.04.06

And what's wrong with Dynasty?

Do you mean Joan Collins or Linda Evans?

00:18 / 09.04.06

Oh yeah,

Cheese and "Hi Nina!"

00:18 / 09.04.06

'Allo Nina!

Cheese and Champagne are perfectly complementary. Can't have one without the other. Like chalk and caviar.

Tryphena Absent

00:19 / 09.04.06

00:19 / 09.04.06

Lies! I don't like champagne. I like wine. Beautiful, beautiful wine...

Tryphena Absent

00:21 / 09.04.06

Red or white?

00:22 / 09.04.06

Both.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

00:22 / 09.04.06

The pear wine is the equivalent of eating Berti Botts All Flavoured Beans. Its awefull, but it's so damn aweful you have to keep drinking out of disbelief.

00:22 / 09.04.06

"This afternoon" actually meant Saturday afternoon. Hence me feeling shit now.

00:23 / 09.04.06

I have even strayed in to the realm of medium priced wines, lately.

00:23 / 09.04.06

Aweful?

So it's dead good then?

00:24 / 09.04.06

I mean over £3, by the way.

00:25 / 09.04.06

Nope its downright horrid. If you could turn used q-tips and wood glue into a drink this would be it.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

00:25 / 09.04.06

Stoat! I just don't understand drinking on *any* afternoon and still, y'know, being conscious at this sort of time.

00:27 / 09.04.06

Ah, I slept for a couple of hours before coming to work.

00:28 / 09.04.06

I'm still baffled. Naps baffle me!

00:30 / 09.04.06

I need a job.

00:32 / 09.04.06

I need somebody to recognise my genius/brilliance/availability/desperation.