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Trapped In The Closet

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13:21 / 02.08.05

R-Kelly.com.

The five-part "Trapped in The Closet" saga. Set aside a little time and watch them all. You won't regret it. They get better and better and better.

Apologies if this has already been seen. I don't know how old it is, and I'm sure that R-Kelly's personal website is first port of call for many a music-savvy 'lither.

14:16 / 02.08.05

ooft.
i...i just... i dont...
ah...
eh.

see,
way i figure,
i never need to watch that.
EVER.
AGAIN.

*shudder*

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

15:50 / 02.08.05

Haha! Isn't it just toe curlingly spine chillingly mind buggeringly DERANGED?!?

I can't help but love it. I can't tell if it's a complete wind up, like an April Fools joke that ran out of control or something.

Hilarious.

paranoidwriter waves hello

19:14 / 02.08.05

I keep expecting the camera to pan right, revealing "behind-the-scenes" scenes of the crew trying deperately not to laugh like naughy school-kids around a VERY smug-faced Chris Morris sitting in a director's chair.

Class.

Regrettable Juvenilia

19:50 / 02.08.05

It's brilliant - a single which is an epic 10-part narrative (he's performed 6-10 so far, and is currently shooting the videos, with rumours of more installments on the way). And it doesn't have a chorus. How's that for 'experimental'? The content is fascinating, too - specifically the way in which Kelly presents himself as an emotionally-retarded protagonist whilst using the song to comment on certain aspects of conventional masculinity in an emotionally mature way. The obvious, unavoidable implication is that Rufus and Chuck's relationship is no different from the protagonist's own down-low infidelity, and that, as his girl says, "what goes around comes around", and no amount of gun-waving bravado is going to chance that. Whether it should or not, that seems a remarkable message for a single from R.Kelly. Given his recent legal, er, problems, for him to put out a single with this title and a recurring theme of sexual secrets is even more audacious.

Regrettable Juvenilia

19:52 / 02.08.05

As for the question as to whether it's a wind-up, or whether it seems like a joke at his expense... He co-directed these videos. Do you really think the element of humour is unintentional?

20:23 / 02.08.05

You never know, it's entirely possible. My favourite bit is the portrait on the bedroom wall.

I did wonder, especially with the "what goes around..." line. Considering he's writing from all viewpoints there's definately a bit of commentary going on there. Jury's out 'till all the facts are in.

Supposing that it is some high-level dissection of conventional masculinity, it doesn't hide the fact that this is commentary observed and written (and acted and directed) by a four-year old.

paranoidwriter waves hello

20:41 / 02.08.05

Flyboy, that's an interesting interpretation and I admit I was too busy laughing to think of this as a genuinely brilliant experimental take on masculinity. That said, I think Meludreen's right about the writing, directing, etc. It also reminds me of sooo many rambling, boring, self-indulgent R&B tracks of the past few years (a lot of which also don't seem to have a chorus); the kind I often sadly end up staring at in half-drunken bewilderment in my local pool hall. Musically, R-Kelly's done far better.

Obviously, as has been typed already, the facts aren't in so we can't say whether the humour is intentional or not; I hope for his sake it is. Mind you, there was a time when he reckoned he could fly...

22:18 / 02.08.05

y'know, i stayed away from typing it earlier, but could this be his elaborate and hugely extravagant way of coming out?
i would believe RKelly was gay if he told me.
i would believe it, especially if he sang his secret to us in a ten part RnB opera.
seems like his kinda extravagance to scream it to the world like that.
i dunno.
i guess it was the title that started me thinking that way, but then... it is an odd title if he isnt, yknow?

Regrettable Juvenilia

22:22 / 02.08.05

It also reminds me of sooo many rambling, boring, self-indulgent R&B tracks of the past few years (a lot of which also don't seem to have a chorus)

Name one, then. Name another ongoing episodic narrative r&b song cycle.

I don't actually understand Meludreen's comment at all; ze seems to be saying "if I give it any thought at all, this does resemble an interesting commentary on masculinity, however nerr nerr nerr R Kelly is stupid". An interesting perspective.

22:30 / 02.08.05

oh, and yeah. i agree that he has done better.
ignition was about ten times better than all of those put together.

22:39 / 02.08.05

ze seems to be saying "if I give it any thought at all, this does resemble an interesting commentary on masculinity, however nerr nerr nerr R Kelly is stupid".

i thought he was deliberately vague.
he seemed to me to be saying that even if RK was discussing interesting subject matter, he was still doing it immaturely.
i might be wrong, but i got the impression meludreen was not a fan of said hip-hopperetta the basis of that.

paranoidwriter waves hello

22:42 / 02.08.05

Name one, then.

Thankfully I can't as I've purposely avoided remembering any; a task which is always helped by their complete and utter blandness -- and I'm saying that as someone who's always liked R&B. Come on, Flyboy: sorry if your a devoted fan of R-Kelly, but this is dire, surely? I mean, yeah, you can find something of merit in almost any art work, but just because people find it blatantly funny doesn't mean they're going "nerr nerr nerr R Kelly is stupid"; we're just saying this is cringe-worthy and good for all the wrong reasons. It screams of macho-ego, even if he is purposefully playing on such themes. Indeed, if it turns out R-Kelly is purposely taking the piss out of bland R&B and himself with this experiment, then I wholeheartedly salute him. Indeed, if this IS the case, then surely he'll be happy we've been laughing along with him, no?

Also, I just can't see anyone really getting down to this, other than really fluffy, none-too-picky R&B fans and those who adore R-Kelly, of which there are many, of course.

But as I typed, he has done FAR better than this in the past.

Regrettable Juvenilia

22:48 / 02.08.05

Thankfully I can't as I've purposely avoided remembering any

Then how can it remind - oh, nevermind. It's already been well-established that trying to reason with you is like trying to play poker with a squirrel.

22:49 / 02.08.05

Indeed, if this IS the case, then surely he'll be happy we've been laughing along with him, no?

well, maybe not if we call him an emotionally retarded man-child...

paranoidwriter waves hello

22:54 / 02.08.05

Flyboy, grow up.

toksik, you're right. I was going to say something about the title, but I seem to have annoyed enough people on this board with my questioning already. I always thought "retarded" was a deeply offensive word (having many negative connotations), but I may be wrong.

23:17 / 02.08.05

trying to reason with you is like trying to play poker with a squirrel.

A touch unprovoked, surely? Somebody's spoiling for a fight.

I'm not saying it resembles an interesting commentary. I'm saying (if it is a commentary at all) that it is a fairly shite one. So what, he's telling us that if you sleep with a woman who's not your wife, then it's kind of the same thing as her sleeping with another man who's not you? Calls into question all sorts of preconceived notions, that one.

And given that ending I find it hard to believe that he's being anything other than dead-on earnestly serious or flat out taking the piss. And I don't think he's taking the piss.

02:23 / 03.08.05

There must be plenty of valid criticisms of this to be made – although you won’t hear any from me as I think it’s ace – but ‘bland’? This shit is spicy as fuck, and just about the least bland musical moment of the year thus far. And sure it’s self indulgent, and more than a little ridiculous, but it’s never less than enthralling, especially if you heard the five parts separately, but sequentially, as they first showed up on the radio/internet/mtv. Not really sure what his agenda is – I suspect it’s a mix of knowing self-parody and genuine “im an unhinged perv who pisses on 14 yr old girls” lunacy. But I gotta give R Kelly props for his audacity, even if it is a boldness born of insanity. Oh, and how cool is it that the ultimate r’n’b lothario, a fella whose spent his whole career determinedly cultivating an aura of serious sexual prowess, gets cramp after only about 2 minutes of action?!
And - not spoiling for a fight or anything – I’d also like PW to give some examples of those rambling, boring, self-indulgent R&B tracks of the past few years which remind him of Trapped in the Closet. Are there any, or is this just like the time my dad said that ‘Bridge is Over’ sounded like Snow’s ‘Informer’?

08:30 / 03.08.05

those songs do sound quite the same.

just say 'i believe i can fly' and shut them up innit?

All Acting Regiment

08:40 / 03.08.05

And - not spoiling for a fight or anything – I’d also like PW to give some examples of those rambling, boring, self-indulgent R&B tracks of the past few years which remind him of Trapped in the Closet. Are there any, or is this just like the time my dad said that ‘Bridge is Over’ sounded like Snow’s ‘Informer’?

Hear hear. I don't think anybody here is spoiling for a fight, but I must say that Flyboy's willingness to look for interest in this peice strikes me as "closer to the spirit of the board" than many other responses. I'm not sucking up to anyone, just stating.

I honestly don't see the point of a thread full of unbacked assertions that this and all musics of it's kind are "boring", "soulless" etc. Can't we see that "Snnk. R Kelly is boring. I'm going to listen to Madvillain which I can because I am Teh X-Perimentalist!!!11!!" is about as useful as "R KELLY FKIN RULES BLuD I CAP YO ASS IF YOU DISS HIM"?

Not that anybody here talks like that, no, and not that I haven't ever written stupid posts here, but sometimes we seem to let it slip, and that's when we get threads of people queuing up to take the piss out of an easy target.

To sum up: it's fine to dislike R&B but please explain why. Don't be like me in the ABBA thread.

Regrettable Juvenilia

10:07 / 03.08.05

If we're going to broaden this into a general discussion of R.Kelly's work, I'm not going to deny he's made some stinkers - the two that spring to mind were both bombastic ballads from film soundtracks, far closer to something like Celene Dion than most modern r&b ballads. 'I Believe I Can Fly' and 'Gotham City', probably the two worst things Kelly has done, are bad in much the same way, bad arguably because that period (1995-1996) seemed to be one in which he was trying to be a certain kind of 'serious' artist, and not playing to his strengths in any way.

If you want to talk about unintentional humour, then hey, lyrically 'Gotham City' is a great target, suggesting as it did that Kelly hadn't read a Batman comic in some time (although, thinking about it, all that civic pride stuff in Baleman Begins might put said song in a less ridiculous light...).

But neither of these songs are anything like 'Trapped...', though - 'I Believe...' in particular is almost all chorus, rather than having none, and the approach to the production and lyrics are totally different - bombast v. restraint, life-affirming platitudes v. twisting, witty but conflicted narrative.

'Ignition (Remix)' seems to have heralded a new period for R. Kelly, not least of all in terms of critical reception. Many people have pointed out the apparent contradiction in an artist producing his most carefree, joyful material at a time when his personal life would appear to be, well, FUBAR. It may well have been a coping mechanism taken to extremes, but it was a very productive one - a song caled 'Happy People', for fuck's sake, even more light and breezy than 'Ignition', real "everything's just fine!" stuff - protesting too much, maybe, but nevertheless a fantastic celebration of the redemptive power of music, friends and dancing.

Which brings us to 'Trapped In The Closet' - all I want to add is that, if people aren't sure whether it's intended to be funny or not, here are "the facts": he's stated in an interview that the song was inspired by and is an attempt to emulate the show Desperate Housewives: a camp comic melodrama.

11:21 / 03.08.05

Surely the whole point of R Kelly is that he's emotionally retarded. Who could identify with him if he were a mature, self-actualized person who was totally comfortable with his sexuality?

11:28 / 03.08.05

Though it should be noted that I still get R Kelly mixed up with Luke.

paranoidwriter waves hello

13:58 / 03.08.05

OK, because I REALLY don't want to get into unnecessarily having to explain myself (yet again) and / or justify something which was pretty innocent and harmless (and I thought self-explanatory), I hereby retract the following:

It also reminds me of sooo many rambling, boring, self-indulgent R&B tracks of the past few years (a lot of which also don't seem to have a chorus); the kind I often sadly end up staring at in half-drunken bewilderment in my local pool hall.

Of course, there is no such thing as boring R&B, it's all subjective, I shouldn't have expected anyone to understand, and shame on me for suggesting otherwise.

BTW, if you want to hear what I think is good, current R&B/Soul/Hip-Hop, then may I humbly recommend Leela James, Common, Kelis, or Al Green's latest album?

One Love.

(BTW, Flyboy: I actually REALLY liked your squirrel analogy; but is there any need to make this SO personal? And "established"? When and by whom exactly? Is there a conversation going on about me somewhere that I'm not privy to? Also, is mud-slinging allowed around here? If so, then maybe I should start throwing insults around to try and hurt people?)

ONLY NICE THINGS

14:26 / 03.08.05

I wouldn't if I were you, PW. I suspect that there would be a lot of people rather better at it.

I think the point was not that there was no such thing as boring hip-hop, but specifically that you said that RK's magnum opus reminded you of a number of songs (belonging to the sets {boring}, {chorus-less}, {heard in pool halls}) and then when asked which ones responded that you had made sure that you didn't remember any. Do you see? Although Flyboy neglects to address the possibility that you remember the _experience_ of listening to them, but do not actually remember them, and so are comparing the feelings they occasioned in you to the feelings occasioned by "Trapped in the closet". I think Flyboy's point was that he could not think of any piece of R&B comparable in form to this work, and thus was looking for clarification on which pieces were being used for comparison.

I think we're missing the important point thought, here.

Squizzle!

Regrettable Juvenilia

14:39 / 03.08.05

The problem is, pw, that this isn't the first time you've been "unnecessarily" asked to support or unpack something you thought was self-explanatory, with unsatisfactory results. Remember Big Brother's Eugene and his non-mainstream interests?

There's no need for your mock-apologetic "there is no such thing as boring R&B, it's all subjective, I shouldn't have expected anyone to understand, and shame on me for suggesting otherwise", either. As has been said above, nobody will have much of a problem with you arguing that one or more particular songs or even artists are boring, if you can present your case in a manner that is neither incoherent nor inherently self-contradictory.

You will find your experience of Barbelith more fulfilling if you back-up statements you make – this in turn will encourage you to think about statements before you post them, asking "can I say why this is the case, and if I can't, should I be claiming that it is?" People are bound to ask you to explain things you may consider to be self-explanatory: this is not unnecessary, but rather the nature of an internet discussion forum.

Squirrels are delightful creatures, but playing poker with one can be a frustrating experience, because they tend not to grasp the basics of poker, even with practice. I would be more than happy if this turned out not to be the case here.

ONLY NICE THINGS

14:44 / 03.08.05

Remember Big Brother's Eugene and his non-mainstream interests?

Eugene's into watersports?

Sorry. I'll be quiet now.

Question about R Kelly: what is his rep like among R&B cognoscenti? I have a feeling that only the most absurd (kiddy-fiddling) and grotesque (I believe I can Fly) elements stay in the mind of the general punter, but is he respected by his peers? To what extent would his chart-toppers be seen as representative of his wider oeuvre? I'm thinking P Diddy as a possible point of comparison here...

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

15:10 / 03.08.05

R Kelly is a friggin' songwriting and production genius, no doubt about that, and his contemporaries can't argue with the quite spectacular trajectory of his extremely lengthy career so far, and enormous sales, which, while it has produced some truly nauseating stinkers, still marks him out as one very talented, very soulful individual indeed.

However, he is also really easy to laugh at, especially his videos.

I can't recall the names of past examples, but this soul-soap-hip-hopera thing has been his ouvre for quite some time now in some form or other, and this "Trapped..." thing seems to be the berserk if logical culmination of the whole idea...

A track he did with Sparkle, the same Sparkle infact who brought the abuse allegations before the courts, was hailed as 'soul-soap' about 5 or 6 years ago (if my shaky grey matter serves me...)...it was a blinding song, based on a piano motif which he has recycled in one form or another many times since (along with loads of other R&B hits, Rodney Jerkins and Sisco being firm faves of the progression...cycle of 5ths, for anyone who cares) and really melodramatic...

Since theat, he went down this hilarious route of having a video for another tune (sorry, titles elude me) in which he gets jiggy with a gangster's moll and ends up having the crap beaten out of him by the Big Boss, and, in a stupendous display of (I assume) unintentionally risible histrionics, ends up in hospital in a wheelchair, in a full body cast, one arm sticking out in plaster, both legs wrapped up, neck brace in place, two black eyes, head wrapped in bandages, overdoing the vocal gymnastics to his equally beaten mistress, prostrate in a coma, who subsequently (or consequently, possibly, particularly if her ribs were in any way compromised) dies at the end of the song in her hospital bed with good old R crying his eyes out on her blue tinged corpse.

Absolutely h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s, and the main reason I can't be sure how sincere this latest offering is. It's genius of some description whichever you want to take it, but the man's track record with really overblown videos is not without blemish.

Regrettable Juvenilia

15:14 / 03.08.05

I can't claim to be an expert but I think 'Ignition (Remix)' pretty much took him back to the fore in terms of r&b artists, while at the same time winning him new kinds of fans (eg, music bloggers), and a generally wider audience seeing as r&b - sorry, 'SFP' - now commands an even bigger share of the pop audience than it did when Kelly was in his first heyday. The allegations against him have not been without consequences - they're widely assumed to be the reason that the 'Best Of Both Worlds' Jay-Z/R Kelly collaboration albums had all kinds of problems (if I recall correctly, Jay-Z pulled out of all promotional duties for the first one in an alleged attempt to distance himself from the Kelly videotape scandal, there was then some kind of reconcilation, and another falling out that, again IIRC, may have involved Kelly very publically wigging out at a joint concert).

So, I think people think he's a bit mad, possibly bad and dangerous to know, but there's a general recognition that he's producing better work than he did at a time when there was no scandal. A not-too-far-off-the-wall comparison might be Michael Jackson, if the first round of child abuse allegations had coincided with the release of Bad...

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

15:16 / 03.08.05

Oh, and that Squizzle is new Fave Photoshop EVAR!!

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

15:27 / 03.08.05

Mnnya-Ha!

'Be Careful' was the track with Sparkle. I still like it, actually.

Keith, like a scientist

17:53 / 03.08.05

I wouldn't normally link to this site, and it is easily the biggest cesspool on the web, but fans of this video should check this out:

"Trapped In The Closet Cliff Notes/Dissection

19:37 / 04.08.05

Musically, those aren't the best songs, but with the videos, it's a pretty solid experience. It's certainly a touch cheesy and melodramatic, but I was entertained, and ultimately that's the point. This is definitely a video that walks the line between being intentionally cheesy and having you actually care about what's up with the characters, and I'll say that I only intended to watch one part, but ended up watching all five.

00:51 / 05.08.05

I want to know what happens next.

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

07:42 / 05.08.05

Exactly.

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