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Footie footie footie, footie footie footie, footie footie footie, England, England

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ONLY NICE THINGS

22:13 / 13.06.04

Well, I'm seeking to take positives from this. One positive is that when the sort of people Stoatie is unhappy with wander into the Swedish Hell's Angel bar where I'm drinking, they leave fairly shortly thereafter. Another is that, altohugh Beckham shoould have scored and the two goals against was a sickener, we saw England hold out against almost certainly the best attack in the competition for 90 minutes, we saw the European Champions having to hack Rooney down in the area to stop him, we saw the continuing growth of Frank Lampard and (pray God) Heskey's last game for England. It looks pretty simple now - England has to win the next two games. On this evidence, that seems credible...

Obviously, the fact that Switzerland have a player called Huggel can only count in their favour, but nonetheless I reckon it's a possible.

And FUCK ME! Portugal have surely taken underachieving to new heights with their defeat to Greece. Raise a glass to the "worst team in Euro 2004" for beating the hosts. In the first game of the tournament. Much as I love the Portugese style of play, you have to feel happy that the underdogs can still spring a surprise...

22:45 / 13.06.04

I watched that match.. England didn't "hold out." They were just really lucky. And then they really fucked up.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

23:29 / 13.06.04

I'm fairly sure it was nothing to do with luck, man. They were playing well, and you have to remember France are (supposed to be) the new BEST EVER. You don't hold out from their attacks with pure luck. When England are good, they're very good. When they're bad, they're very very bad. See: the last 3 minutes.

And cry.

06:11 / 14.06.04

Lucky my arse, Linus. With the obvious exception of Zidane, there's no fucker on earth can line up a free kick like Beckham. The boy comes with FreeKick XP as standard. Lampard putting it away was genius.

Neither was Gerrard's fuck-up down to luck either. It was last-minute panicking; the team were probably rattled that Beckham failed to net that penalty. David James committed himself to thundering out of his goal and the writing was pretty much on the wall from the moment he left his line.

They lost to a free kick and a penalty, not bad luck. They played pretty well for 45 minutes, their defence was better than expected and they held off France in the second half, and then got sloppy in the closing minutes.

08:24 / 14.06.04

Personally, I thought France were in command of the match most of the way - I was surprised but happy by Lampard's goal, didn't see it coming at all. And neither did France, obviously.

While we might be able to gloss the eventual crushing defeat (and that was a crushing defeat, which I hope we bounce back from) as last-minute sloppiness, I've got to say - Euro 2004 is really not the place for last-minute sloppiness.

Regrettable Juvenilia

09:10 / 14.06.04

Hmmm. The Guardian's post-match analysis seems a little kind to some of the English players:

Steven Gerrard 8 [out of 10]
Exactly the force Eriksson hoped he would be. His energy, drive and passing range demonstrated what was missed at the last World Cup.

Yeah, I thought he displayed great range when he passed back to Thierry Henry. Hey Stevie, what's French for va-va-MUPPET? And Heskey is just fucking cursed, isn't he? A great big lumbering bad luck charm...

Goodness Gracious Meme

09:21 / 14.06.04

Blimey, Flyboy In Football Thread Shocker...

Pretty much agree with Saxy's comments. France are a very good side, defensively they're looking alot stronger than I expected. We did well to hold them as much as we did, had a couple of moments of class and a couple of moments of clunk.

Pretty good showing, but you can't be that sloppy against the favourites. We'll get away with it against the other teams in our group, though. And if we play as well as the best bits of that match, semi's for sure...

We're The Great Old Ones Now

10:19 / 14.06.04

The real problem is that England's cricketers have been playing well, and Tim Henman's on top form. That means that the England Batting Collapse/Henman meltdown has all been transfered to rugby and football.

Having said that, those three minutes were shocking. England: when you absolutely, positively have to kill any sense of hope in your supporters, accept no substitutes.

ONLY NICE THINGS

11:12 / 14.06.04

The real problem is that England's cricketers have been playing well, and Tim Henman's on top form.

Blink and you'll miss it. After his heroics on clay, he went out in the first round of the Stella Artois to an unknown. The Henman meltdown is officially back on.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

11:42 / 14.06.04

We have many fine examples of how to lose in the most spirit crushing way possible!

I really hope they can bring it back for the next two games - they're definitely playing well enough (so long as they're not panicking/Emile Heskey) - but it can't be easy to come back from the almost nearly elation and humilating defeat.

12:27 / 14.06.04

Well, if we crash out at this stage, Sven's got to pack his Mulberry travel bag and piss off out of it.

But I don't think it's that much of a psychological battering to lose against France. Building on the positive, in that they played reasonably well for 90 minutes, they should be well up for Switzerland on Friday.

5pm kick off though - bad timing for us office monkeys.

12:30 / 14.06.04

Meaning to type Thursday, obviously.

Perhaps Sven can invoke Thor to make England win.

ONLY NICE THINGS

12:39 / 14.06.04

Heskey and Vassell, though - we really shouldn't be ending the match with two strikers who don't score on. Where's the point? It just means France can concentrate on attack, because they know Vassell is quick and willing but not a massive threat, and Heskey is built on an Indian burial ground. Hargreaves made sense, although he would have made more sense shielding central defence, but Heskey and Vassell makes me suspect that Eriksson has not realised that we're not playing friendlies any more.

"Still time to experiment," thinks the Machiavellian swede. "Plenty of time before the European Cup starts..."

nedrichards is confused

12:50 / 14.06.04

Well Vassell has scored 6 goals in 18 caps. Not a bad return when you think that he's been playing in the Ole Gunnar Solsjaer role most of the time. All in all, as in most football threads I agree with Haus.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

13:29 / 14.06.04

"Hang on, are we winning?"
"This isnt very English is it?"
"Quick, bring Heskey on! Where is he?"
"He's cowering from the sky."
"Again? Dammit, if only he wasnt born a cursed voodoo child on the ruined remains of that burial ground! On friday the 13th! And delivered by Noel, of Noel's house party fame! And touched by Jeremy Beadle's weird little hand."

13:34 / 14.06.04

It occurs to me that maybe we need a sport forum for the Spectacle. Never really occurred to me before. Any thoughts?

13:39 / 14.06.04

Only if it can be in St George's livery.

And called Shoot!.

Regrettable Juvenilia

14:22 / 14.06.04

Surely any Euro 04 threads should really go in Film, TV & Theatre, unless any of us are watching the matches live in Portugal?

14:33 / 14.06.04

Or Switchboard, perhaps, as current affairs.

ONLY NICE THINGS

14:45 / 14.06.04

Hoom - I think that would trivialise the Switchboard, and I'm pretty sure Film, TV and Theatre would be a bit off as well, as the discussion is not about TV or theatre, but rather football, which happens to be being watched through a TV...

I will pop over to the other thread and ask cube what his objection to a "Sport" forum would be.

14:54 / 14.06.04

I must say I'm hating Euro2004. I mean,don't get me wrong, I love football, but my country was the first to loose the opening match and, honestly, if you could see the look of just a couple of places on this country you'd wonder why the fuck did they built so many stadiums. I'm not so proud of being portuguese right now.
Still, I really liked Englan's match with France, and I'll be seeing Germany-Netherland. Hope it's a goodmatch.

Goodness Gracious Meme

17:48 / 14.06.04

poor you, was wondering if we had any Portuguese in here....

20:21 / 14.06.04

Ha ha ha. I loves it. Allez les bleus.

Nah, in fairness England deserved a draw. Lampard was class.

ONLY NICE THINGS

21:31 / 14.06.04

Wowser. I left the pub with Sweden 4-0 up against Bulgaria, whose dark horse is, it seems, exposed to cruel daylight. Is Henrik Larsson our duck-resembling deity or what?

Actually, he doesn't look like a duck. He looks like Jen from Dawson's Creek. In a very odd way.

And did you *see* Sorensen's double save? Quality stuff.

Goodness Gracious Meme

13:15 / 15.06.04

bulgaria collapsed totally... Sweden scored the first goal totally against the run of play, albeit caught out by the exact same route the Sweden had been boringly plugging away all match. Before that, Bulgaria were looking alot brighter...

yawn - thing's buddy

13:59 / 15.06.04

Larsson is the best goal scorer in the tournament.

I was at his testimonial at Selik park the other day - the guy's a fuckin legend.

but sunday night:

england: are YOU scotland in disguise?

twats.

wake up - you were shite - you had two chances on goal and took only one of em.

what's all this 'holding off' pish? - fuckin bravo, holding folk aff - top stuff. (ha ha)

Good to see 'every shire represented round the ground' reduced to tears.

I love to see England lose. luv it.

You have a numpty for a manager too.

Why take off Rooney? Why make practically a triple substitution (and thereby disrupt the harmony) when England were supposeldy adequately dealing with the french?

listen mate, you don't guard a 1-0 lead from 35mins into the game.

shite. shite. shite.

doubtful for the second round mate.

beckam - good free kicker - but such a sad example of a footballing star compared with zidane.

ha ha.

imagine: one bloke cuffed your entire team.

how embarrasing.

ONLY NICE THINGS

14:37 / 15.06.04

Hmmm. I'd like to believe you care, but tbh I think you're probably just after the attention. So, since everyone should get to go home happy:

Oh gosh! Look at that iconoclast! The very suggestion that England may not be much cop chills me to my marrow! What sort of dangerous combination of Georges Bataille and George Morrison could suggest such a thing? Where will he strike next?

Goodness Gracious Meme

14:37 / 15.06.04

Bothering you much, watching from the sidelines?

"Herik Larssen is the best striker in the tournament" aha. ahahahahahahahahahahaha.

You watch him in the SPL, love.

17:21 / 15.06.04

Bah so close for Latvia - only managed to catch the last 30 minutes.

It seems that I'm the only person interested in them doing well, if it's not Ice Hockey then their not interested. With no Scotland I need someone to support and their both equally shite

Tryphena Absent

19:04 / 15.06.04

Screw Latvia, I was rooting for them, I get 8 quid if they win Euro 2004. They still have time...

Damn those badgers.

20:29 / 15.06.04

Eight quid? They're 500-1 at the bookies, so get down to William Hill's with a shiny tanner, ADL.

However, as I am, spiritually, Czech, I cannot concur.

Goodness Gracious Meme

22:08 / 15.06.04

argh. just lost spiel on Holland/Germany game.

Holland abysmal for 75 mins, Germany capitalised with Frings' excellent free kick. being 1-0 up suited their counter-attacking game perfectly.

Took holland a ridiculous amount of time to wake up to the idea that they actually had to play... team should be on their knees to Van Hooijdonk, who, subbed on at 75 or so, won everything he went for and generally gave the rest of the team a needed kick up arse. Pulled previously unruffled German defenders out of position, giving space for cross which led to Van Nistelrooy's acrobatic goal.

Holland then became lively while Germany's defence got ever more wobbly.

Neither of them massively impressed, and I can't see them giving France, Spain or even England that hard a time.

Goodness Gracious Meme

22:17 / 15.06.04

Holland's ability to shoot selves in foot shouldn't surprise me by now.

Actually, it didn't. They're so frustrating.

ONLY NICE THINGS

22:47 / 15.06.04

I think it's impossible to predict how Holland will do - I reckon they will qualify, though perhaps in spite of themselves - when they do play well together they can be overwhelming, so as long as they score a couple of goals during those periods, they should be OK - but not for long against disciplined opponents with any quality. Quarters?

Good to see van Hooijdonk - a man who once memorably claimed that £6,000 a week might be a good wage for a homeless person, but not for PvH - back in action. I've become oddly fond of him, despite his role in the destruction of Nottingham Forest...

yawn - thing's buddy

07:47 / 16.06.04

no haus - wrong - I just sincerely hate the english football team.

twats.

and bengali - I'd expect better from a football supporter - Larsson doesn't need to prove himself to anyone.

Despite being in SPL, he still managed to score in 2 world cups, 2 european championships, and twice ina UEFA cup final against the best team in Europe. Along the way he scored against teams like Juventus, Valencia, Barcelona, Liverpool, Stuttgart, Leon and Ajax amongst others.

Oh, he won the golden boot as well and is Britain's most prolific striker in Europe.

Basically:

shut it.

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