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I Have A Serious Question

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Matthew Fluxington

20:25 / 01.03.04

Why do chain sandwich shops never have rye bread?

gridley

20:59 / 01.03.04

Well, I know this isn't exactly the answer you're looking for, but most people who know enough to choose rye bread probably wouldn't step foot in those places. They'd go to a more authentic deli. I'm pretty picky about what delis I'll go to. It's pretty much got to be an authentic Jewish deli or an authentic Italian deli.

■

21:01 / 01.03.04

The other answer is that they're probably international operations. Outside of the US and central europe, I'd be surprised if most people had even heard of rye bread let alone want to eat it, so it'd screw the central supply method and inflate margins to bother producing it.

gingerbop

22:13 / 01.03.04

Oh good. I was going to sound completely stupid, but at least Cube has given an almost valid reason for my bread-ignorance. I have heard of it, but have no idea what it's like. Is it thin, stale bread? It sounds thin and stale, but I doubt you'd be hankering after it if it was. I may be wrong...

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:20 / 01.03.04

Dude, rye bread is like eating cardboard!

Would you eat cardboard?!

Smoothly

22:39 / 01.03.04

Personally, I find it more baffling that these places consider white bread to be such an outre sandwich preference. Judging by my local supermarket, this is far and way the best selling variety; yet can you find it in Pret a Manger? Can you bollocks. Oh no, there all the bread has to have nuts and twigs and little pebbles in it...
Frankly, Flux, I have no sympathy.

bitchiekittie

22:40 / 01.03.04

varied choices cost more. and it's all about the bottom dollar, son!

bitchiekittie

22:42 / 01.03.04

flux, how do you feel about me calling you "son"?

I'm not quite old enough to pull it off, maybe. or hairy. if I had a really hairy face you might feel more compelled to see me as a parental figure, maybe? no offense to your mom or anything, I'm not suggesting your mom has a hairy face. and if she does, I'm not making fun or anything.

Matthew Fluxington

22:50 / 01.03.04

I'm okay with it.

My theory for why rye bread isn't more common: anti-semitism. I'm sure that's at least part of it.

And rye bread is GREAT you fuckers! Especially when it's got the seeds in it.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

23:03 / 01.03.04

Yeah, like, maybe if I was a small animal who stored it's food for the winter y'know? Bread with seeds on made of wood.

Matthew Fluxington

23:09 / 01.03.04

You've probably never had good rye bread, which is understandable, considering that you live in England. I'm from New York, where we have plenty of excellent rye bread.

w1rebaby

23:10 / 01.03.04

Suedehead is just jealous because he doesn't have any working teeth any more, and has to suck his sandwiches through a straw.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

23:21 / 01.03.04

England is where all rye bread is actually made. We invented it, you tard.

40%

01:19 / 02.03.04

it's all about the bottom dollar, son!...Cash Rules Everything Around Me, CREAM get the money!...'Nother dollar bill yall...

bitchiekittie

01:54 / 02.03.04

You're just jealous because you don't have any working teeth any more, and have to suck your sandwiches through a straw

you're getting yourself all confused, man, that's the stereotype reserved for brits.

also, I have had good rye, and I have had EXCELLENT multi-grain rye, and by multi-grain I don't mean that gritty shit they make for health nuts with no idea what good food tastes like, I mean the yum stuff that bread freaks like me like to eat. mmm, breeeead.

gingerbop

02:22 / 02.03.04

But do you not all crave a few slices of big fluffy white bread full of empty calories? MMmmm... crraaapp bread. Nummy.

bitchiekittie

02:48 / 02.03.04

no. though sourdough and potato bread are high up there on my desirable breads list. mmmm

Cloned Christ on a HoverDonkey

03:19 / 02.03.04

Sourdough bread is the dog's danglers. It's all doughy. And sour.

the Fool

04:14 / 02.03.04

Outside of the US and central europe, I'd be surprised if most people had even heard of rye bread let alone want to eat it

'cause you know places like Australia and that are really backward and have wild animals running down the main streets. I personally get to work in the pouch of a kangaroo and don't know nuffin aboot these here high falootin breads yer talkin ov. Yeh ha! I gotta go bag me sum sheliahs!!!

angel

06:21 / 02.03.04

That was kinda what I was thinking Fool! I used to eat Rye bread regularly in Australia (Mmmm, Yuuuum!), as you can pick it up in Supermarkets made by a number of the leading bread brands.

So I'm afraid you don't have a monopoly on Rye Breads. Finding it in the Uk however has been trickier, nigh on impossible.

illmatic

06:57 / 02.03.04

Bitchiekittie: I heard you calling Flux "son" in a kind of Hip Hop way. Kind of like "we 'bout ready to kick some mad flavas, son" or "pass the gat, son, Im fixin' to bust a cap in his rye bread eatin' ass". Try it out in real life, I think it might suit you.

_Boboss

09:52 / 02.03.04

surely it's 'sun' not 'son', following thew 5% nation teaching of man=sun, woman=earth, child=seed?

Forced into this conversation

10:13 / 02.03.04

might as well be ´san´, san.

_Boboss

10:25 / 02.03.04

well-

....word.

illmatic

10:28 / 02.03.04

So all them Wu Tang records where I thought they were shouting "son" at each other, they're actually shouting "sun"? What I thought was jocular male bonding is actually a cosmological reference to that huge yellow thing in the sky? Freaky.

Bitchiekittie, will you join the Five Percenters and find out for us?

40%

10:39 / 02.03.04

Doesn't 5% Nation also teach that the black man is God's son? They could be using 'son' with an equally spiritual meaning.

_Boboss

10:56 / 02.03.04

yup-troo dat

we don't know really do we?

bitchiekittie

12:27 / 02.03.04

Sourdough bread is the dog's danglers

that reads like a bad thing, yet I can't imagine how "doughy" and "sour" could be a bad thing. help a sista our!

illmatic - straight up, thass me!

I will definitely consider joining, but first I have to find out if there is a membership fee, or if I have to suffer some sort of non-monetary initiation. like a flogging.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

12:31 / 02.03.04

No, BK, "the dog's danglers" is a variant of a common British expression, "the dog's bollocks." It translates approximately to "awesome."

No, really.

gridley

12:43 / 02.03.04

Man, I hate sourdough bread too. It's like white bread that's gone rancid while remaining soft. I imagine bread teaming with maggots would taste similar to sourdough bread.

It's all about the rye!!!!

bitchiekittie

13:08 / 02.03.04

the maggots add crunchy texture and protein. also a bit of that crazy hip continual-motion pizzazz that all the kids love!

Jack Fear

16:04 / 02.03.04

The distribution of rye bread is carefully controlled in an attempt to keep outbreaks of ergotism in check. Fungal ergot flourishes in the rye plant, and its psychoactive compounds survives the milling and baking processes. Many scholars believe that the periodic "witch craze" outbreaks of Renaissance-era Europe were in fact due to a group psychosis accompanying mass ergotism.

Two of the three sentences above are 100% true.

The Apple-Picker

16:08 / 02.03.04

Two of the three sentences above are 100% true.

Ooh! Ooh! I know! The last two. I got to see some ergot in my plant pathology class a few years ago. It's gross. It looks like bugs.

Dammit, Renaissance-era Europe had all the fun.

grant

16:25 / 02.03.04

The rye bread I've eaten from Europe is very thin, hard stuff that has little in common with the soft, thick-sliced stuff you need to make a good Reuben sandwich.

Reuben with rye loaf in background:

Packet of dense German rye bread:

Although if Subway can make Italian Herb bread, I don't see why it can't make a good loaf of rye... unless... does rye flour cost more than the wheat kind? It might not be cost-effective to do it en masse.

Ethan Hawke

16:29 / 02.03.04

Will nobody think of the ciabatta?!

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