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The Tantrum Thread

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Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

05:14 / 03.10.03

I love each and every one of you.

Except you.

YOU can BITE ME!

06:37 / 03.10.03

I've read this thread carefully, reflected at length and come to the conclusion that YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF SOGGY-ASSED WANNABE TOSSERS!!

07:23 / 03.10.03

Jesus Christ. My four month old baby can tantrum better than you unimaginative losers. AND HE DOESN'T USE CAPITALS TO GET HIS POINT ACROSS!!!! OR LOADS OF EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!

07:34 / 03.10.03

I think I just don't have enough testosterone floating around in my system. I don't do tantrums, hating and fighting very well. I'm brilliant at sulking though, but a sulking thread would be a logical impossibility.

Tryphena Absent

08:09 / 03.10.03

What the fuck is wrong with using CAPITALS? You come in here, you threaten me, you behave like MY thread is a pile of complete shit and then you try and sulk. Why? Because you're a fucking loser that's why. Ignoring the fact that Sax has the mental age of his son, Spyder's a great big WEIRDO

Tryphena Absent

08:11 / 03.10.03

What the fuck is wrong with using CAPITALS? You come in here, you threaten me, you behave like MY thread is a pile of complete shit and then you try and sulk. Why? Because you're a fucking loser that's why. Ignoring the fact that Sax has the mental age of his son, Spyder's a great big WEIRDO and Solitaire can go climb up a building and then jump OFF, Xoc's got to be the most pointless and IRRITATING poster in this godforsaken, shit forum.

Fuck, I forgot about Illmatic.

Regrettable Juvenilia

09:35 / 03.10.03

Hmm. Tell me honestly, how would you all feel if I moved to lock this thread? Don't hold back, now.

Tryphena Absent

09:47 / 03.10.03

Well, you know, as part of my clique I'd support you completely because clearly I would never QUESTION the word of a member of the London Kingship of Barbelith. Oh no, I never ever QUESTION YOU AT ALL EVER. In fact I believe in everything you say because I am only a puppet on Barbelith's string and have been utterly brainwashed by you and everyone else who posts more than twice a day.

LOCK THIS THREAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

09:54 / 03.10.03

Anna, it's always a good idea to finish writing before you hit the Post Reply button. How thick?

13:30 / 03.10.03

You are ALL stupid whiny bitches, back off Anna (that's right, I called her Anna just to piss you off Anna) and pick on someone your own size (OK de L, rest up, I've got these cunts covered- and get off my back, where do you get off criticising ME? The mighty Quantum? Just because some of us have to spend time offline having job interviews in Brighton doesn't mean you can get away with your shit- YOU'RE GIVING ME THE RAGE!!! BITCHQUEEN!)

Step on up bitches, I'm waiting to smack Jack Fear down 'cos you all think he's the bollocks, BRING 'EM ON!

13:32 / 03.10.03

Sax, it's always a good idea to finish whining before you hit the Post Reply button. How much of a sloppy bitch are you?

Tryphena Absent

13:40 / 03.10.03

Sax is too dim shit to realise what the delete post button's for. Twat.

And fuck you Quantum, you're fucking wrong in the head, WHERE THE HELL DO YOU GET OFF DEFENDING THESE PEOPLE? Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Who was the other person who agreed to be a complete shit stirrer 'cos I'm fucked if I can remember?

13:47 / 03.10.03

That particular whine was actually finished, Quandumb, but I've plenty more to unload on you cockwipes.

14:09 / 03.10.03

Stoopid Sax sux shit, is shit in the sack and has sex with socks- sick sucker.
AnnadeL, READ, BITCH, READ! Where do I defend these snot monkeys? WHERE?!?! I of course refer to the event, well past the threshold of your goldfish-poor memory, where you say "Where the fuck is Quantum? Fucking lunatic, never on time, someone tell him he's not fit to lick the sole of my least favourite pair of shoes" YOU SLOPPY BITCH! Suck on Sax is all I can say to you, suck on Sax's socks and sandals.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

14:59 / 03.10.03

You all suck, you immature po-faced po-mo bitches. Fuck off back to your LotR Harry Potter crossover slash fic, you elf-fellating nonces.

15:07 / 03.10.03

Don't call me a pointy sucker mo-fo, I'll mordant your fucking carnival big stylee.

I'm off to smoke blunts and bone bitches all weekend and leave you poor lonely motherfuckers to think up some decent abuse for Monday.
Have a good weekend you moany mildly offensive mothas- Q.

15:10 / 03.10.03

I am still hungover after being at work ALL DAY! (pls note caps).
The sad thing is that I didn't even drink that much. A few beers at the Vibe bar and a curry to follow with some wine. I must be getting old if I can't shake it, and I blame each and everyone of you.

Fuckers.

Tryphena Absent

15:14 / 03.10.03

FUCK OFF AND SULK Jub. Jesus, this is like so shit, you're so not throwing a tantrum at all. It's totally OUT OF ORDER. If you don't shut up I'm gonna fucking TORTURE YOU.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

15:15 / 03.10.03

Let's take a break here and think about this:

If all the cars

In all the world

Were lined up end to end

That'd be about half as far as you can all FUCK OFF!!!

Spyder Todd 2008

23:19 / 03.10.03

Dude? What the fuck was that? What kind of asshole puts a bunch of spaces in their post for no reason? Dumbfuck.

Hattie's Kitchen

23:47 / 03.10.03

Don't be dissing the Stoat or I'll smack you upside your face, rip your head off and shit down your neck, you rancid little wanksplash.

Who wants some?? Huh?? You wanna a piece of my ass?? Bring it on, bitches.

23:50 / 03.10.03

I think ya'll just need some nookie

02:43 / 04.10.03

[in my best bass rumble]
Are you volunteering??

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

16:15 / 05.10.03

That's so like you Bitchie...saying that all the world's problems woudl be solved by sex.

What about sex where you fight to get excited? Huh? ANSWER ME THAT YOU NO GOOD TOAD LICKER!!

Spyder Todd 2008

23:40 / 05.10.03

Shit, why not? Let's all have a massive fucking orgy! Everyone! The kitten actually had a good idea!

And piss off, Kitchen Boy.

23:46 / 05.10.03

Yay! Spyder has 5 appendages, enough for everyone!

01:50 / 06.10.03

You know, I've been watching this thread limp along the mid-range of the queue for, what, a week now? without bothering to read it, because I figured it was either a fairly specific slapfest among a select group who really deserved it, or an floppy, club-footed attempt at an art form NYC Barbelith has already proven themselves past masters at. Turns out I was right the second time.

You should thank your politically correct socialized heavens that Flux, Todd, bio k9, MJ-12 and I are too busy dishing beat-downs with real, live chains to college boys in the East Village to have even noticed this pathetic mockery.

Let me make this clear, because you guys can be a little slow on the uptake. I don't even need the other guys to take care of you. All by myself, I WILL come down there with a nailgun and a chrome bumper ripped off of your mother's station wagon, I WILL take each and every one of you out into the alley and I WILL crush your flabby asses into gravy. I will take a slice off your back and make a sandwich and not even bother to eat it. I'll just throw the sandwich away. Got it? I am hell, motherfuckers. Pipe down before you annoy me, you puny, monkey-baiting, undernourished mongrels.

02:35 / 06.10.03

Qalyn: you are American. I am Scottish.

The head is the weapon.

And it's already proven that Scots can beat guffies/FEBs (the English) when outnumbered 10 to 1 (cf: Bannockburn.)

'Understand much?', as they might say round your bit.

Oh, your post's moderated, baby. Moderated as fuck.

02:44 / 06.10.03

I'm Scottish-American, you fucking subject. Come back when you've got a pair.

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

02:46 / 06.10.03

You are hell?

Then I guess you are my bitch because when I come to kick ass, HELL'S COMING WITH ME!

02:47 / 06.10.03

Yeah, I got your back, dude. Shut up and keep swingin'.

Hattie's Kitchen

03:12 / 06.10.03

And piss off, Kitchen Boy.

Kitchen girl, actually, stoopid. Ha! Lick my venomous flange!

Tryphena Absent

08:19 / 06.10.03

Qalyn you little shit. All you fucking New York bastards do is post in-jokes that your livejournal buddies get to read and then spam the board with. You're full of shit, you couldn't fight if you fucking tried. For fuck's sake, you're all too pussy state whipped to smoke in bars!

WFMU you suck.

09:38 / 06.10.03

Do you really have a venomous flange? What a wonderful defence mechanism. Please call Richard Attenborough immedietely, Wildlife on One need to do a special on your special beaver. Is it brightly coloured to ward off predators?

And in keeping with the thread, the rest of you can lick it.

Tryphena Absent

10:28 / 06.10.03

Oh and by the way... anyone like, say, the Mask is Older who posts something like this...

Situation:

New board poster has opinions.
Espouses opinions, loudly.
Is told to rethink opinions.
Flux and Flyboy entertain each other.
New board poster gets bored.
Vacillates.
And leaves.

Flux and Flyboy stay and entertain each other.

How many times has this happened?

Your constant need to create authority figures on Barbelith worries me. I mean there Flux and Flyboy are, minding their own business as usual, arguing with someone about music because they get hard over it like the sweet little geeks they are and then you come in and instead of enjoying the argument and telling them they have awful taste (sometimes they do) you post something like that! Because you need to pump these people up in to like, your headmaster at school or something? Well it's really fucking lame. I mean what the fuck is wrong with your heads? Why are you making people in to your arch-enemies because they like some music? Have you got any idea about how the world actually works? Are you the kind of people who actually never leave the house and last did so when you were forced in to some godawful institution which you hated and that's why you're still treating the world in the same way? Is that it? Is it?

YOU'RE ALL FUCKING WUSSES. GET A LIFE AND EITHER POST OR DON'T POST BUT DON'T FUCKING WHINE ABOUT IT TO DADDY BARBELITH ALL THE TIME. ARRGGHHHHHHHH. I hate you all.

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