Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

A Thread for Things Which Are Supposed to be Great but actually, when experienced, turn out to be RUBBISH. And vice versa, if you like.

Page: (1)2 3

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

08:53 / 14.08.03

My starter for 10, having just been :

1. IBIZA

What a fucking shit-hole. OK, it got better, and eventually I kind of saw the point to it, but jeeeezus h. money-$hot, what a fucking SHIT-HOLE! The locals literally hold all tourists in utter contempt and you can see why : ARSEHOLES EVERYWHERE. Don't believe those who claim this is only true in St. Antonio - they're EVERYWHERE.

So, 'lithers, what have you been lead to belive is great and cool, but is actually rubbish and crappy?? Please share.

The Natural Way

09:00 / 14.08.03

Ibiza's much better if you find a way to get involved with the local's *scene*. It's raves on beaches without the endless football chanting.

A way to actually enjoy the place: camp out on one of the other islands and visit occasionally - s'wot we did.

The Natural Way

09:03 / 14.08.03

Obvious, but: MATRIX RELOADED.

Essentially just boring poo.

I reckon Neo should have slapped the Architect round the chops, gone "Wheeeeeeoooo!", slapped his own arse, winked, and ran out the room!

Tryphena Absent

09:10 / 14.08.03

The human brain.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

09:20 / 14.08.03

Sea Monkeys.

TWENTY-ODD YEARS I WAITED TO GET SEA MONKEYS! When I was a kid I wasn't allowed to order them, cos my parents said they'd be crap. I finally find them in a shop many years later, and my dreams come true!

Unfortunately, my parents were right. All the little bastards ever did was fuck, and having a facehugger orgy going on next to your bed is NOT good for mental health. Then some twat spilled them all over my carpet, ruining both the carpet and the poor sea monkeys.

Legion, I called them. If you must know.

I may get some more one day... maybe I was just having a critical year.

unheimlich manoeuvre

12:20 / 14.08.03

Twinkies.

When i was a child i used to dream of them. There'd always be adverts in comics and well they are just PROCESSED SHIT...

...oh and Hershey bars too.

The Natural Way

12:23 / 14.08.03

I know! It's incredible! Twinkies, Hershey Bars, Hostess Fruit Pies.... Who fucking says "advertising doesn't convince people to run out and buy stuff"?

I'd have ran the Atlantic.

Rollo Kim, on location

12:25 / 14.08.03

Hershey bars really are not fun. They taste like cooking chocolate.

And Sainsbury's Wheat free pizza is not the joyous experience I first thought it was.

hanabius yamamura

12:43 / 14.08.03

... now, i realise this may get me ridiculed without end for all eternity, but, on FINALLY getting round to watching 'WITHNAIL & I' a few months ago, i thought it was a bit ... well, ... shit ...

The Natural Way

12:45 / 14.08.03

I wouldn't ridicule you for it. I might demand an explanation, though.

DEMAND!

hanabius yamamura

12:51 / 14.08.03

well, for years every SINGLE person i ever drank/partied/munchied with extolled the wondrous virtues of the 'BEST FILM EVER', 'SO FUNNY, YOU'LL PISS YOURSELF' etc. etc. etc. ...

finally watched it and the dvd player practically imploded with the force of the anti-climax ...

DaveBCooper

12:51 / 14.08.03

The guitar-players on Charles Bridge (I think that's the name) in Prague. Everyone told me that if you go down there at night, it's really mellow and great and fab.
It wasn't. If I want to hear poo renditions of Dylan and Oasis numbers, I can get those here in London any day of the week. And they were so numerous I couldn't find a quiet spot just to enjoy the view. Tch.

trouser the trouserian

13:09 / 14.08.03

"Vampyros Lesbos" - as reccomended by Grant M. in the back of an Invisibles issue.

A ZZzzz-fest of an arty-vampirey, faintly 'erotic' movie.

The Natural Way

13:19 / 14.08.03

hana: People sometimes get the wrong impression about W&I before they watch it. It's anything but explosive and riproaring comedy. It's slow, unpleasant and depressing. But with a smile. A manic smile.

hanabius yamamura

13:24 / 14.08.03

... and i seriously think that, if the thing hadn't been hyped beyond the level of bespectacled wizards and phoenixes ( is that the plural of phoenix? ), i would've found it a far more rewarding experience ... i found it to be far more in line with your post above ...

Ganesh

13:26 / 14.08.03

Or, alternatively, it's Richard E Grant in a stupid coat, pulling faces and being, well, Richard E Grant. In a slightly shit way.

Go Hana Bi!

Ganesh

13:29 / 14.08.03

Psychiatry. It's not rubbish, exactly, but I thought it'd be all Hammer Horror padded cells, straitjackets, couches, sinister beards, duff Austrian accents and 'tell me about your childhood'.

It's not.

Masturbation.

Nurofen.

It says on the back that it relieves Backache. Like fuck it does. The only thing it relieved me of was £2.19

Regrettable Juvenilia

14:24 / 14.08.03

Adulthood.

"Yes, when I'm a grown up I can eat as badly as I want, stay up past my bedtime and spend all my money on shiny things!"

Yeah, and that'll make life so much less stressful and more fun...

Mourne Kransky

15:15 / 14.08.03

One of my earliest disappointments: The Real Man From Uncle Spy Suitcase. The cigarette packet that was also a radio was CHEAP, HOLLOW PLASTIC. No cigarettes, no communicating with other agents from under the bedsheets after all.

The Mona Lisa. Tiny - just a wee woman with a smirk. Paint properly, Leonardo!

Real Indian tea. The finings, left after everything that looks like a leaf has been exported, boiled up in condensed milk. Yuk.

American snack foods that I'd been reading about all my life in so many US books, e.g. Oreo cookies and Hershey bars.

Justin Timberlake. Can't sing, looks funny, can dance a little.

Anything by Joanne Harris. Don't bother.

Anything by A S Byatt. Stop her, someone.

Bethlehem. The memory of Manger Square stays with you but for all the wrong reasons.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

15:19 / 14.08.03

Those sweets you got at the centre of liquorish fountains, what kind of sick individual designs a sweet that tastes disgusting. Yeah, AND Parma Violets, I'll have you too you foul tasting little pieces of purple vomit.

15:33 / 14.08.03

Only every single critically acclaimed movie and/or indie rock band that has been recommended to me for the last 3 or 4 years.

(Except for Donnie Darko and Mclusky).

Zero Gravitas™

17:14 / 14.08.03

X-ray specs! Bastards!

Ditto on the Twinkines, Sea Monkeys and Herschey Bars

The first kiss.... did I really snog that boy? *shiver*

The London Planetarium..... graphic animation that would not look out of place in the 80's Asteroids game!

Broadway musicals! I don't see the entertainment value of watching people prance around on stage singing dialogue in an unmelodious manner!

suds

17:21 / 14.08.03

dangerous, your post made me really sad. have you been to the docs?

GLASTONBURY. everyone says you'll love it and you end up seeing people mugged, dudes pissing on your tent and moby. moby!

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

17:25 / 14.08.03

The human brain

Will you marry me?

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

17:27 / 14.08.03

I'm tempted to say 'marriage', but only as a joke.

Guv.

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

17:32 / 14.08.03

Ok, for balance and the vice-versa : Things you just knew were rubbish, but turned out, actually, to be great

1. (reach for the bag, folks) Having a baby (awwwwwww)

But, hey, still tiny

No star here laces

18:45 / 14.08.03

Crack. "Like every orgasm you've ever had in one go" - is it fuck. Buy it off nasty people, smoke it in nasty places and it's only marginally better than coke, but considerably more expensive.

"Tesco's finest range" - finest of what, exactly? It promises so much, but delivers at the level of yer average bar lunch...

Absinthe - mmmm, it makes you obnoxious, unsteady and potentially violent. How nice. The first time I tried it I fucked my mate's ex while he was passed out next to us (not good, not good at all). The second time I dropped the girl I was with on her head and had to take her to the hospital to get stitches (that was a good 6 hours worth of apologising givent the state of the NHS), and the third time I almost set fire to someone's house before smashing their window. Gives you the kind of hangover that's 9/10 guilt and 1/10 headache. Made me want to top myself every time...

pointless and uncalled for

18:58 / 14.08.03

Schoolyears - They're the best years of your life apparently but no, you have to spend a third of your life being piss bored, your bedtime is enforced by people who want you to have better than they did. Not to mention trying to survive five years of angst, a voice that twitches between Luciano and Liberace in a moment, the most vicious society in the world and everyone elses bad poetry. How on earth is that supposed to be the best years of your life.

I'm sure that these are the watchwords of those with no ambition. I like being an adult. I like that when you're an adult you can screw, drink, smoke and tell your parents to fuck off without any financial penalties.

The only childhood that I want is the one you thought you had when you tip 60 and false memory syndrome is really kicking in.

On the other end of the scale - Roast Beef, Stilton and Coleslaw Bagguettes. Sounds bad but is a taste sensation.

The Falcon

22:31 / 14.08.03

Phoenices, surely.

I don't think I've ever been wrong about this cultural stuff yet.

Oh no, my teenage self bought an Extreme album. *blanches*

ONLY NICE THINGS

23:02 / 14.08.03

There's a hole in my heart that can only be filled by *you*, Duncan...

Ice cream. everyone talks about how much they would live an ice cream in all this hot weather, so you go out to see a friend and offer to get ome in, and out of curiosity buy one for yourself, having not eaten an ice cream for about a decade. It's a Magnum. It's gren, to represent the sin of envy. It tastes like shaving foam. Cold shaving foam.

Fuck that shit...

The Falcon

01:02 / 15.08.03

Some ice cream is nice.

Regrettable Juvenilia

07:42 / 15.08.03

The Classic and White Chocolate Magnums are good. I've never been reminded of shaving foam but then maybe I just don't eat enough. Or can you never eat enough shaving foam?

There's some real gold in this thread - Xoc on the Mona Lisa, Laces on everything (haha)... To think when it started I was tempted to post "Barbelith".

Scrambled Password Bogus Email

08:04 / 15.08.03

Fucking Ice Cream!!

In Ibiza!!

A white chocolate Magnum, for 3.5 fucking Euro's, and the rest of the afternoon feeling worse than after eating a couple of MDMA Supermen and drinking San Miguel in 115 degrees in the shade.

Amen to that.

Page: (1)2 3

Add Your Reply