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Underground > Books, Criticism & Writing >

The Left Behind Series

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Foust is SO authentic

20:20 / 20.03.03

Exactly, Thjatsi. Nice Try, cocksucker would become the motto of half the educated world.

09:21 / 21.03.03

I have ordered the first book of this From Amazon. I still can't explain why. Cool.

Maybe this can be a joint reading project

Our Lady of The Two Towers

11:22 / 21.03.03

Too late. I'm nearly finishing it then i'm getting the fuck out of Dodge.

Foust is SO authentic

01:30 / 01.04.03

All right, I had to do it. I gave them my email address so they could tell me how the war in Iraq will lead to Armaggedon. And they sent me this.

Dear Colleague:

Thank you for visiting the Left Behind Prophecy Club. Because of your recent
interest, we’d like to extend a special discounted offer and reduce the normal
$29.95 to $19.95.

To subscribe today go to:
http://ads.track-star.com/linker.ts?ts=1;2;315;4_3_20&promo=A0C0161F-1B26-4E7D-84E5-AF7AD2C55979

This week in the Left Behind Prophecy Club, and around the world, we’re all
asking: "How does a war with Iraq fulfill end times prophecy?"

In recent weeks, subscribers to the Left Behind Prophecy Club have had access to
information that makes the connection undeniably clear.

Here are just two examples:

In the Earth’s Last Days, the Bible predicts the rebuilding and the sudden
destruction (for the second time) of the city of Babylon. Babylon is in Iraq,
just 62 km south of Baghdad, and Saddam Hussein has constructed a $1,000,000,000
palace on the ancient site. War would surely threaten this monument to the
"Butcher of Baghdad" and fulfill this key piece of biblical prophecy.

Saddam Hussein sees himself as the replacement for the Old Testament tyrant King
Nebuchadnezzar, but he is little more than a cheap imitation. If Saddam is
martyred in an attack, that could well clear the path for the Antichrist who may
emerge on to the world scene to take control of the United Nations and move it
to the new Babylon.

This kind of insight can be yours every week when you subscribe to the Left
Behind Prophecy club. Because of your recent interest, we’d like to extend a
special discounted offer and reduce the normal $29.95 to $19.95.

Every subscriber receives exclusive access to the authoritative perspective of
Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins, the best-selling authors of Left Behind, as well
as end times analyst Mark Hitchcock.

As world-changing events unfold, LBPC subscribers will be the first to receive:

*In-depth analysis and interpretation of the news in light of end-time prophecy.

*Exclusive Message Boards

*Insiders view of the Left Behind Series

*Plus, the first 20,000 subscribers with receive a free copy of Left Behind
iLumina software (a $20 value).

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

06:43 / 01.04.03

Funnily enough, I've started getting LB spam since I started reading the book- c'mon, 'fess up, who told 'em?
"Is Iraq the New Babylon?"

Mister Six, whom all the girls

19:49 / 07.04.03

iLumina softwae!!!???

Holy Ghost in MY machine? I don't think so!! It'd get in the way of my porn for one thing.

Foust is SO authentic

00:12 / 08.04.03

Since this is already bumped up, I'll pass along this bit of news. A few days ago, I ordered We All Fall Down from Amazon. A review and extracts will appear here within two weeks.

02:32 / 08.04.03

I used to work at a bookstore, and we couldn't keep these things on the shelves. Some people would get very upset that the newest edition was in hardcover. Apparently they had never bought a book before and didn't know that in just a few months it would be available in trade paperback. The Left Behind series seemed to come out at a fairly rapid pace, and the transition from hardcover to soft was also short (about 3-4 months as opposed to 8). I guess they didn't want to piss off their fanbase too much.

Never read any, though I have been tempted. The greatest temptation was for the "teen" version of the series. Ohhhh, they still call to me.

03:42 / 08.04.03

LMAO...

"Thank you for visiting the Left Behind Prophecy Club. Because of your recent interest, we’d like to extend a special discounted offer and reduce the normal $29.95 to $19.95."

And all this is coming from a "fictional" end of books on the Rapture ? This sounds like every other televangelist out there today.
For a mere "donation" of love of $100 we'll pray for your soul, along with sending you the loving pamphlet "Why GOD hates the Earth".

Soon for the mere price of your soul you'll get a "free" bumper-sticker saying "Come Armageddon, Cum "

Which reminds me of a story I was trying to write about several shifty televangelists and the devil teaming up together to gain some unwitting souls along with pockets of cash.

Elijah, Freelance Rabbi

16:23 / 08.04.03

My issue with these books isnt the preachy nature of the text, i expected that from an amatuer author and a priest writing them.

what bothers me is the dialogue, it hurts to read, i try to picture people saying this stuff, then i picture myself punching them in the face.

so yeah, you want post rapture fiction, read up on Battle Pope.

Mister Six, whom all the girls

17:32 / 08.04.03

And watch 'Day of the Beast'

18:15 / 08.04.03

Amusingly, my first encounter with this enterprise was the board game. I thought, "hey look, a board game about the end of the world. Cool!" Turns out, it was so bad we couldn't even finish the game. Not only does the game require you to answer bible trivia, but the overall mechanic is so weak that it quickly devolves into a series of die rolls for hours until someone manages to land on the antichrist when he's in the right square and end the game. No fun at all, alas.

On a good note, there's an RPG called The End that is quite fun while covering the same setting as the Left Behind series from a very different perspective. Basic premise: The apocolypse happens, the rightous go to heaven, the wicked fall to hell, and the meek inherit the earth. The poor bastards.

Foust is SO authentic

15:36 / 14.04.03

I finished We All Fall Down just the other day.

I eagerly ordered this book soon after learning of it. I wasn't sure what I was looking for... all I knew was that Left Behind was laughably bad, and I wanted something else to satisfy my life-long interest in Christian end-of-the-world beliefs.

What I got ended up rocking me to my core. This book is the finest exploration of Christianity I have ever read. It cuts through all the brown sugar and hits the heart of the issue - Christianity is about giving yourself up. The protagonist, Jimmy, knows what is going on around him. The Rapture has taken place, the Christians are gone, and the anti-Christ rules the world. And yet, he doesn't sign up on God's side. He can handle it all himself, or so he believes. Jimmy's insistence on saving both himself and a woman he once loved is the driving force of the book.

The content of the book is fairly unforgiving. Torture is described in explicit detail, and Jimmy's rage at both himself and God spills out in profanity-ridden rants.

The writing is a mixed bag. I get the impression that this author was learning how to write as he began this novel - the writing starts out not much better than Left Behind, but attains a more than satisfying quality once the book hits its stride.

Violence, sex and profanity aside, I don't understand how this book could have been written by anything other than a Christian, or perhaps an ex-Christian. If you want to know what God demands of the human soul, read this book.

If anyone wants, I'll create a spoilers thread with a full description and some excerpts from the more interesting portions.

Foust is SO authentic

15:49 / 15.04.03

Jack? Mao? I expected you two to be interested...

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

16:03 / 15.04.03

Oh, I'm interested, alright. Bring it on!

16:22 / 15.04.03

Sho nuf. Let it roll.

08:54 / 30.09.04

Just stumbled across Slacktivist, reading the Left Behind series so you don't have to. They're currently doing a page by page analysis of the series and are up to page 66, I can only salute this brave individual for risking their sanity for our edification.

Foust is SO authentic

15:22 / 30.09.04

Kristof had criticized the triumphant, cackling tone of L&J's 11th LB novel, The Glorious Appearing, in which the redeemed -- and Jesus himself -- seem to delight in the destruction of the lost and the unforgiven. LaHaye responds:

The eschatological problem Kristof mentioned of believers mourning the lost in the next life is a subject that bothered me for years until I found Revelation 21:4, which informs us that in his mercy God will wipe away all tears from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. Somehow the memory of all who reject Christ will be mercifully eradicated from our memories.

Blessed are those who mourn, for their memories will be wiped clean of whatever it is that they were mourning about. The eternal sunshine of the evangelical mind.

God, that's depressing.

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