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First of all, thanks to everyone one here who is voicing concern. It's one of the reasons I love this place is that the folks here honestly seem to care if you're about to do something stupid. Let me hit the issues one at a time here and see where we stand.
"May be worth 5 mins idle fancy. But do you really want to go thru the psychic implications of RAPE? Picturing it? Experiencing before, during and after? Are you equipped to?"
See, very good questions. Every time it has come up before, I've always dismissed it as someting to speculate on for 5 minutes or so and then bounce back to something else. As far as your other questions, you make very good points on all fronts. And the answer is probably "No" for all of those things. I'm not exactly wedding myself to this concept, mind you, it's just something that has been popping up enough in my head and the world around me, that I thought I'd explore it a bit more. I fully realize that most likely, after a bit of pondering and working with the concepts, I'll come to the conclusion that in order to bring the project to fruition would involve my going places that I REALLY don't want to go to right now.
"Question: Is this a personal thing or do you intend to use it with other people? I wouldn't what to have a divination done for me with a deck like that unless I was feeling suicidally reckless."
Oh heavens yes, personal. In point of fact I find myself wondering if a universal symbolism for the desck would even be appropriate. I mean, for it to be a deck based off the things that REALLY express the fear/shame/hate/degradation of contact with the alien, then it would probably have to be more personalized wouldn't it? And, dredging up material from your own personal abyss is dangerous medicine no matter how you look at it.
"Best reason so far. But meditation on what? Your mortality? The rotten parts of yourself? The chaotic nature of the universe?"
Yes to all counts.
"How do you see this working with regard to your deck - at present it seems to be more a list of "taboos" or anti-social urges rather than a complete picture of the darkside. As Pepsi says, how and why do you envisage it working?"
Not entirely sure to be honest. Which is why I came to you fine folks. Anyone could throw together a collection of "things that suck" and call it a deck. Not that I'd see it as any more useful for spiritual development than say "The Pop Up Book of Phobias". The key, as I see it, and I could be wrong, would in fact to have a working map of the darkside without necessarily just making an "anti-tarot". A delicate balancing act if there ever was one. And perhaps rather pointless. I'm just hoping to exhaust this train of thought that seems to be coming up a lot lately.
"Okay, I'm just throwing in my ignorant tuppence, but wouldn't the 'B.I.S. tarot' have a few positive cards like 'Love' or summat in similar places to 'death' and 'the tower'?"
A friend of mine suggests HOPE.
"While this is certainly an interesting exercise, it's got the potential to turn very toxic, very fast. You're collecting a Tarot hand of powerful, deep-rooted, and dangerous symbols; I hope I don't need to tell you how that could go pear-shaped."
It could go pear-shaped in a New York minute, Mordant. Which is why I guess at the moment, I'm happy conceptualizing it as an intellectual exercise rather than a spiritual working. Because I'm not entirely sure that I'm ready to, when it comes down to it, leap into the Abyss with nothing but a grin and a martini. And even if I am ready to, I'm not entirely sure I want to, which in the end, is a pretty good indicator I'm not ready to.
The idea of a toxic tarot is just so bloody fascinating though. At least in the conceptual stages.
"Look at your motivations, look at possible consequences, and don't do anything you wouldn't do in your non-magickal life."
I never do anything with magick, that I wouldn't be willing to do with my own two hands. Magickal ethics are too often left by the side of the road, especially by chaoites it seems.
Hopefully I'm making some sense here and not just coming off like one who wanks. |
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