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The People Who Hate People Party

 
  

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Ierne
19:55 / 11.07.02
You're not confused at all, Godog.

You're well aware of who you are – and so am I.

Cheers.
 
 
The Planet of Sound
07:17 / 12.07.02
A well-argued case, Haus; you express many points that my puny mind had simply struggled to comprehend, if we refer back to what was actually discussed at the time. In no way is it you that has failed to comprehend one iota of the nuances of that contentious thread.

Now, I'd like to apologise. I am clearly very stupid indeed, and my words yesterday were harsh. In my time on Barbelith, as you rightly imply, I have failed to take part in worthwhile or interesting discussion, either through my posts or topics, be they on class, circumcision, eugenics, Will Self or Roger Hargreaves. Your one criticism of me is clearly based on your clear and complete understanding of modern psychological thought, with its concept of many branches of intelligence, be they visuo-spatial, 'IQ', 'EQ' or, (ugh!) 'Oxbridgean'.

You, on the other hand, are entirely innocent of any charges I angrily levelled at you. You are neither arrogant, obsessive, unpleasant, nor indeed, a bully. You use neither obscurantism nor circumlocutary argument while passing your days on the Webnet thingy making (numerous) people feel unhappy. Your blog is not dull, nor solipsistic, your business is no doubt successful, and you are a very beautiful young man. I'm sorry to have wasted so much of your valuable time.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
07:46 / 12.07.02
So, you're whipped, but in a really sarcastic way?

Works for me.

(I'd quite forgotten "Will Self is the best writer in the English language alive today", and then your complaint that the writers others had mentioned as possible alternatives, like NOBEL PRIZE WINNER Derek Walcott, were "obscure". Bless).

What does worry me slightly is that the dear sweet child has such a hate-on for me that he has been obsessively reading my weblog and searching for pictures of me on the Internet for, what, the last eight months? Scary-go-round.
 
 
The Planet of Sound
07:56 / 12.07.02
Just the once was enough, Danny-boy. Question: do you ever have moments of self-doubt, Haus? You've just been subjected to the most horrendous abuse, and you've failed to engage with, consider or defend any of the criticisms aimed at you. Maybe it is best to bluster on blindly in the classic pompous style of the English Lower-Upper Middle Class... or perhaps it might be better to take a long hard look at yourself. Not in the bathroom mirror, while masturbating, for once, but on a rather more abstract level. You know; 'Why do so many people find me objectionable?', 'Why does my life revolve around a website set up to discuss a comics writer I don't really like?', 'Why don't nice guys like me?'. That kind of thing...
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
08:32 / 12.07.02
Umm...criticisms such as "your weblog sucks and you're really ugly"? Both matters of personal taste, and neither interesting nor profitable to engage with. What, we're going to post pictures and let our peers decide who is prettiest? Hardly.

Arrogant - yup, I can see that could be a valid criticism. But there is the old saw "Not better than everyone. Just better than *you*". And one could argue that blithely refusing to countenance that you could possibly have misunderstood a) William Blake and b) the idea of "Eords creating reality" (which I think was a bit deeper than "if I use words to invite a friend to the pub, I have created a reality in which we go to the pub"), choosing instead to defecate in your hand and throw it in time-honoured Barbefashion.

Unpleasant - well, yes. That's part of the point of the Haus suit.

Obsessive - regrettably so. Am very bad at leaving the sandpit, even after the special boys (that's you, just so you follow the metaphor) have fairly comprehensively crapped in it.

A bully - that's a tricky one. I think probably more a check on hubris. However, if sufficiently pursued and pissed off (and you may have noticed that, unable to respond meaningfully to the refutation of your original argument, you have deployed and repeated your entire stock of adjectives in personal abuse), particularly by people who flout basic etiquette by, for example, using our given names (which says "stalker" in my book, sweetie), I can certainly oversnark. It was wrong of me to drive through three states wearing your head as a hat. I'm sorry.

As for circumlocut*o*ry argument (where was that MA (Hons) in English Language from? The University of Cornflakes?), uhhh...you have been desperately twisting on the hook trying to justify your numpty-heided initial statements. So, I should admit that I am wrong more often and more gracefully, sure - I think many people could say that about themselves if they were being honest. I think it's unlikely that it is likely to be as a result of your actions, though.

As for making people feel unhappy, the nice guys liking me...every so often I put the Haus suit up for execution, and the general consensus seems to be that it is a useful thing. I make a small number of people who take themselves far too seriously and have issues with various things about me unhappy. Everyone else seems to be rubbing along just fine. And you know, Sherman, I think they were pretty unhappy to begin with.

Verbosity I will totally cop to - but touch typing and reasonably quick wits mean I spend far less time here than you seem to (hunt and peck, hunt and peck. Pause for thought. Goddim on the ropes now, Sam. Hup. Yup) think. And I *do* like Grant Morrison, I do I do I do. Not that Barbelith was a Grant Morrison discussion board anymore by the time I encountered it, or indeed long before. Your arguments are getting a bit ragged and desperate here, Sherman. Did I just say "getting"? Looks like I'm a lot nicer than I thought.

Now, this is one reason why you don't "engage with" abuse. Because it's abuse. Its intention is to offend and shout down. And I have to say, you seem to be getting very upset over there (please, take this as an observation from genuine concern, rather than an invitation to make a series of utterly unprovable accusations of crying over the keyboard). And now I feel bad about a) letting you annoy me and thus getting dragged into this in the first place and b) upsetting you with my book-larned ways. So, guilt.


And self-doubt. But, you know, not as a result of this level of crude, sophomoric abuse.

Now, what can we do to make *you* happy, Sherman?
 
 
The Planet of Sound
08:51 / 12.07.02
Not upset at all, dear boy; just concerned for your mental state, funnily enough. As the next stage of yor new-fangled 'introspection', perhaps you'd like to read back through this thread, and ask yourself, honestly, who was the first to 'engage' with abuse.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
09:10 / 12.07.02
So, actually, we both care about each other very, very much? Cooool.

This entire thread is a very bad idea, and lacks the 13-page might that was "Barbefeuds". I can only thank Planet of Sound for helping me to keep the damage highly localised.

Planet, I am wrapped around you. I am giving you a lovely warm huggle. You are held. You are loved.

See how everything comes back to love? It's just like The Invisibles. Or similar. Now, what's the sound effect for ignoring somebody again? "Plink"?
 
 
Rev. Orr
09:31 / 12.07.02
What is this, a Very Special epsiode of 'Blossom'? Yet again, our need for ritualised blood-letting is denied by the saccharine centre of the Haus-suit. You are a big fluffy carebear masquerading as the Hooded Claw. Sidney Snieveley j'accuse.
 
 
Cat Chant
09:51 / 12.07.02
... and as Haus and Planet of Sound glared at one another across the sleeping bodies of their bandmates, the tour bus suddenly began to crackle with another emotional intensity altogether...

Sorry. Wrong thread.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
10:34 / 12.07.02
No problem. It was really nothing. Just a case of big mouth strikes again. But it's not strange. He prefers to live his life this way.

Planet, you're the one for me, fatty. Meet me under the iron bridge.
 
 
Rev. Orr
11:06 / 12.07.02
You think so, Deva?

And as Narcissus stared into the deep, the image on the water began to speak...
 
 
The Planet of Sound
12:24 / 12.07.02
Most amusing how the Huggles come out when Haus doesn't want to admit his flaws; which is always, isn't it, Hausy-baby? One wonders if someone as truly intelligent as yourself ever gains anything from debate, as it seems you have little left to learn about the world or indeed, yourself.

As for a lovely, bouncy sweat-soaked orgy of making-upedness; sorry, as I've stated previously, childishly, angrily, pathetically, but truthfully; you're just too fucking ugly, sweety. Inside and out.
 
 
Cat Chant
12:36 / 12.07.02
Looks like you just haven't earned it yet, baby.
 
 
Loomis
12:42 / 12.07.02
Well if it's not love then it's the bomb that will bring them together.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
12:45 / 12.07.02
So bitter, little planet. You find something about me *very* upsetting, don't you? Is it an unnecessary inferiority complex from your University of Cornflakes education? A vague suspicion in your tummy that actually you do want to meet me at the cemetary gates? A vicious class resentment against the "lower upper middle class", whatsoever that may be? Or is it slowly percolating through that masssive capacity for self-regard that, although nobody has emerged with credit from this little spat or indeed the original Blake slapping, or your funny little apercus on literature, or your belief in the "criminal underclass", you *really* look like a chucklehead.

It all seems a little unnecessary. We are who we make ourselves. You can rise above that. *Fascinated* by the fact that you appear to claim to know what I look like. How intense has your stalking regime been? Do you take a little cameo of me to bed with you, muttering "I'm better-looking than him. I am I am I am. That's why I like to look at this picture. To see how much better looking I am. If only I had some naked pictures, so I could see how much better my body is than his as well. Yes"? Originally I was joking about the beauty contest, but now I'm actually quite interested in the idea...

Oh, and the huggles came out because I started the day encountering some lovely messages of happy, and realised that cruelty is cruelty even when you're doing it to something that doesn't understand it. So, I'm trying to be nice and spread the happy.

I think I did admit to my faults, or some of them, in the post before. It was quite long, so you may not have got to the end ("blights with plague the marriage-hearse", just in case anyone asks), but there was some real fault-admitting action there, admittedly moderated by the fairly simple statement that my natural stubbornness and unwillingness to admit I am wrong is unlikely to be cured by you attaching yourself to my trouser leg and noisily and messily dying. It's just going to ick me out.

Here's me admitting to another one of my faults. I am very, very bad at walking away from this kind of adolescent pissing contest. I allow myself to be pulled down to the level of my interlocutor too often. I persevere when there is absolutely nothing left to play for. And, ultimately, I allow myself to get depressed about other people too easily. So, although part of this is fee-fi-fo fun for me, it also makes me sad. Because the above-mentioned combination of ignorance and arrogance you have honed to a fine art is precisely what brings out the worst in me.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
12:46 / 12.07.02
Loomis and Deva: Yes, but when you say it's going to happen now, what exactly do you mean? I've already grated too long...
 
 
Lurid Archive
12:53 / 12.07.02
Haus, this is getting ugly now. I can't stomach cruel sports...
 
 
Cat Chant
12:58 / 12.07.02
Behind the hatred, there lies a blundering desire for

LA-LA-LOOO-OOOOVE
 
 
Loomis
13:02 / 12.07.02
Planet could've have been a poet or he could've been a fool. Ooh you did a bad thing ...

Haus says he's not happy and he's not sad ...
 
 
Lurid Archive
13:02 / 12.07.02
...but a rather painful love. I can appreciate that, but only when all parties consent and are competent to do so.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
13:05 / 12.07.02
Yeah, but then a strange fear gripped me and I just couldn't ask. Oh, hang on. I did ask. And I was rejected.

Maybe it would be better if I admitted more of my faults, but I fear that my only weakness is a list of crimes. My only weakness is, well never mind, never mind.

I know it's over, but a rush and a push and the land we stand on is ours. It's really serious. There are times when I could have strangled hir, but you know I would hate anything to happen to hir. I'll take it slow this time, much as I'd like to throw my skinny white body down. And huggle.

Nothing's changed, Planet of Sound. I still love you. Oh, I still love you. Only slightly, only slightly less than I used to. My love.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
13:10 / 12.07.02
But if a day came when he felt some natural emotion, he'd get such a shock he'd probably jump in the ocean, he'd lie in the middle of the street and die, he'd lie down and die...
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
13:14 / 12.07.02
...a hostage to kindness and the wheels underneath hir?
 
 
Loomis
13:21 / 12.07.02
Don't rake up their mistakes. They know exactly what they are. And what do you do? You just sit there. I've been stabbed in the back so many times, I don't have any skin, but that's just the way it goes ...
 
 
w1rebaby
13:31 / 12.07.02
I think Keats and Blake are on your side.
 
 
The Natural Way
13:49 / 12.07.02
Oooohhhkay....

Enough w/ the soul-barey Morrisey bit.

Or whatever that was.
 
 
The Return Of Rothkoid
14:00 / 12.07.02
Well. You don't have to look so pleased.
 
 
Regrettable Juvenilia
15:16 / 12.07.02
Frankly Mr Planet since you ahhhhhsk...
 
 
grant
15:17 / 12.07.02
that joke isn't funny anymore.
it's too close to home and it's too near the bone.
 
 
Ganesh
15:23 / 12.07.02
Beware: Haus bears more grudges than lonely High Court judges...
 
 
Jack The Bodiless
13:28 / 13.07.02
I love all of you. This thread has cheered me up immensely. Thanks, Haus - you ARE the perfect comedown cure...
 
 
Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo
06:33 / 14.07.02
Oh, and I hate Freddy Prinze Jr..

Is he on the board?

Can we invite him to be so that I can hate him here instead of having to pay admission to hate him at the movies?

And again, that Solitaire Rose chick is a real bitch. I don't think she can possibly suck enough.
 
 
deja_vroom
13:53 / 15.07.02
Try reading the Planet/Haus* bit listening to Arvo Part's Te Deum. Trust me.



*(see, you're a couple. Put together by Fate. You're ready to rock and fight crime)
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
14:01 / 15.07.02
Lurid, how can you say I go about things the wrong way? I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does.
 
 
Bear
14:21 / 15.07.02
I missed this thread, its much better if you imagine both Haus and Planet being interviewed by Michael Cole, possibly in the style or William Regal and Chris Nowinski.

I'm sorry but I did enjoy it, its like no argument I've ever seen before.
 
  

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