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This here is where you get jealous

  
  

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bitchiekittie
16:27 / 14.05.02
I went out to the grocery and brought myself back some ben & jerrys and some hot fudge. mmmm. hot fudge

jealous yet?
 
 
We're The Great Old Ones Now
16:29 / 14.05.02
Very.

They don't sell the jars of hot fudge over here. I once begged. They said no.
 
 
bitchiekittie
16:32 / 14.05.02
bastards. I think I may have make a stand for chocolate lovers everywhere and demand that candy machines - complete with little packets of hot fudge and freezers of ice creamy goodness - be made a mandatory amenity at every workplace.

goddamn I eat too much sugar
 
 
Tryphena Absent
16:33 / 14.05.02
Hmm... I have sour cream and onion Pringles to indulge myself with(mmmm). It's too cold for ice cream today plus I have no relationship troubles to ease out with it so there'd be too much guilt (it's the money- not the calories). Still jealous though.
 
 
that
16:35 / 14.05.02
quite jealous... I'd like some Tofutti vegan ice-cream myself, mostly because eating it would keep me occupied for a little while. I've finished all my work, I hand it in tomorrow, my smoking aunt is here again, and I'm boooooooooooooored shitless.

I used to really like the 'twisted' Ben and Jerry's with peanut butter cups in it. Jesus, those things are just the best. Peanut butter. Chocolate. Salty. Sweet. Heaven.

I once considered entering the Ben and Jerry's bog snorkelling contest. I kid you not.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
16:36 / 14.05.02
I just want to leave the office. I could be buying ice cream. I could be returning library books. I could be stapling my penis to a table. I just want to leave the office.
 
 
bitchiekittie
16:42 / 14.05.02
tofutti! I just want the pleasure of repeating that, loudly, to all of my annoying coworkers who insist on shorting their words (situation=sitch, etc - LOUDLY)

ben & jerrys phish food is the best, as it is not only chocolate based, but also filled with chocolate bits, marshmallow and caramel. mmm. if you like peanut butter, may I strongly recommend chubby hubby? oh dear god its good stuff

sorry to hear you cant go out, haus. I dont know what kinda job you have, but you could always go for the "extended bathroom break". look really sick before and after, no one will dare ask questions for fear youll answer
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
16:43 / 14.05.02
Well, damn.

You mean to tell me you're not allowed to staple your penis to a table at work?

That's got to be somekind of infringement of human rights, right?
 
 
Ganesh
16:44 / 14.05.02
I have stolen the office stapler, Haus, for that very purpose.
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
16:45 / 14.05.02
Is it one of those huge industrial staplers?
 
 
Ganesh
16:47 / 14.05.02
It's whatever you want it to be, Big Boy.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
16:49 / 14.05.02
Phish food... no... chocolate fudge brownie has that chocoholic appeal. I am the chocolate purist... 70% cocoa solid all the way.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
16:51 / 14.05.02
If I staple my penis to an office table, then I can't get out of the office, can I, Special Boy Potus? Not without tearing off my penis or widening the door.

These things are often quite simple if you think about them.
 
 
Ganesh
16:53 / 14.05.02
I'm afraid I'm largely unable to interpret that kerrrazy spelling as anything other than 'pish' - which puts me off both the product and the band (which is pish).
 
 
bitchiekittie
16:55 / 14.05.02
ah, thats good, too, but sometimes the brownies are a little dry or cakey for me. if Im going to eat brownies they better be moist and chewy chock-fulla-gooey goodness!
 
 
Murray Hamhandler
16:57 / 14.05.02
It's my day off and I just became full-fledged-ly sick overnight and nothing sounds good to me but not being sick anymore and sleep. And maybe stapling my penis to a table.
Arthur Sudnam, II
 
 
bitchiekittie
16:58 / 14.05.02
ganesh - I wouldnt try it either, because Im stupidly repulsed by the grateful dead and their cohorts. but, desperate for chocolate, I raided my friends freezer and stole his ice cream (he threatened me with violence but my chocolate-desire induced frenzy won out and I devoured it as he watched in horror)
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
16:59 / 14.05.02
Well Haus, have you considered a small coffee table? or one of those folding card tables? You don't need one of these extravagant banquet tables everytime you know.

Less is more.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
17:00 / 14.05.02
point taken, I've recently discovered Saxby's chocolate brownies, shove the mix in the oven and you get the gooiest (sp?), most scrumptious creations ever. However I still go for that ice cream... Haagen Dazs belgian chocolate as well... see all round chocomania.
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
17:01 / 14.05.02
Yes. Because we often kick back with our coffee and play poker in my office.

Have you ever actually had a job, SPB? Workstations. Modular tabling solutions. A one-way ticket to penile pain.

Why am I even discussing this? Really, SPB, staple it to whatever you want. You can tell your grandchildren about it.
 
 
bitchiekittie
17:18 / 14.05.02
janina - are you in the uk? if you are in the us, Ill certainly look for that brand.

we had lunch catered here a few weeks back and they brought the most amazing brownies Ive ever eaten. Im spoiled on the things forever
 
 
Mourne Kransky
17:26 / 14.05.02
Really, Haus? I'm losing my fine old (and rather scabby) desk away on Thursday and having a brand new "workstation" thrust upon me, a change I have fought until now. Can't wait, industrial strength stapler at the ready...
 
 
deja_vroom
18:33 / 14.05.02
This time with heart!:

"Coffee in the office, coffee coffee coffee! (Sha la la)
Cough, cough, coffee in the office, yeah!
(bridge)
voice-over, GodspeedYouBlackEmperor stylee:
"I woke up. There is a coffin in the office".
(end bridge)
Coffee in the office, coffee coffee coffee! (Sha la la)"
 
 
Captain Zoom
19:43 / 14.05.02
Well, I had a bowl of.....uh....

No, no, I had a big tub of cho....no, no I didn't either....

What about a small sachet....of.....nope.....um.....

Okay. I have nothing for anyone to be jealous of today. I had a terrible coffee buzz earlier that just stressed me out and I'm so in debt that I've spent much of today with my head resting squarely in my hands. Do not be jealous of me.

I'm jealous of the lot of you.

Zoom.
 
 
Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo
21:46 / 14.05.02
Piffle. I'd only be jealous if you had orange marshmallow peanuts.

I have 6 Sonny Chiba movies on DVD, including all 4 Street Fighter movies. Jealous?
 
 
the Fool
22:26 / 14.05.02
I have an afro ken soft toy. Pull his tail and he boggies. Put him on his side and he breakdances! Beat that!
 
 
the Fool
22:29 / 14.05.02
err, boogies, not boggies. He doesn't poo. I don't think that would be very cute.
 
 
netbanshee
22:56 / 14.05.02
The mother of all chocolates...



...one is definitely enough...
 
 
MissLenore
02:31 / 15.05.02
I'm all over Galaxy bars from England. Whenever my relatives visit I always ask for one of the big size ones. Godiva is nice...but I'm just as happy with cheaper chocolate.
 
 
Shortfatdyke
06:35 / 15.05.02
well not only can i not eat ice cream due to lactose intolerance, i've recently had to give up my 'well i can deal with all this bad health shit as long as i can drink coffee' obsessively favourite drink as well. because when i have it, it feels like a giant hand is squeezing my intestines.

so do you all feel guilty now, huh? do you?
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
11:43 / 15.05.02
Nick: Here's a simple recipe for hot fudge sauce that I've seen in a few places. Haven't tried it yet.


One 14 ounce can of sweetened condensed milk
2 ounces unsweetened chocolate
Melt the chocolate over low heat. Stir in milk and heat through.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
11:48 / 15.05.02
Oh, fuck. I'm such a moron- I've had this site bookmarked for ages and I forgot all about it. It contains loads of duplicate recipes for commercial products, including...

Ben & Jerry's Hot Fudge Sauce.

MAKES GENEROUS 1 QUART

4 ounces, unsweetened chocolate
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
3/4 cup, unsweetened cocoa powder
2 cups, sugar
1/2 cup, milk
1/2 cup heavy whipping cream

Melt the chocolate and butter, stirring frequently, in the top of a double boiler over simmering water. Add the cocoa and whisk until dissolved.

Using a slotted spoon, gradually stir in the sugar (the mixture will be the consistency of wet sand). Cook, stirring occasionally, over simmering water for 20 minutes. (Check the water level in the double boiler occasionally, and replenish if necessary.)

Gradually stir in the milk and cream and continue stirring until completely blended. Continue cooking and stirring (and checking the water) occasionally for 1 hour. The fudge sauce is ready when it is completely smooth and all the sugar is dissolved.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
11:49 / 15.05.02
And I have a load of coffee-centered chox at my elbow. So there.
 
 
Shortfatdyke
11:53 / 15.05.02
mc, you are a downright cruel woman....
 
 
pointless and uncalled for
11:59 / 15.05.02
I hover between, pity for the pour soul who can no longer drink coffee and elation that there is more in the world for me to drink.
 
  

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