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Underground > Film, TV & Theatre >

pointless remakes

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21:16 / 20.09.02

How dare you call John Squire a chimp!!!!!!!!!!!

Old brown-eye is back

21:34 / 20.09.02

He am the resurection.

22:04 / 20.09.02

A Bug's Life... better than The Seven Samurai?

No.

Just... no.

The Magnificent Seven, maybe, if only for the musical score. But A Bug's Life?

Old brown-eye is back

00:27 / 21.09.02

As good as. Well, nearly.

Old brown-eye is back

00:28 / 21.09.02

No, actually, bollocks. Every bit as good as.

14:09 / 21.09.02

You are dead to me now. Dead.

14:51 / 21.09.02

But... A bug's life was shit. And I don't see any connection.
I suspect I may be confused.

Would someone do me a favour and tell me that the bit about remaking seven samurai is a joke? Pleasegodno. Then again, I liked the magnificant seven...

Has anyone seen the Stallone remake of Get Carter? I can't imagine it would be any good but I'm willing to listen.

15:24 / 21.09.02

A village is menaced by bandits: an emissary is sent to hire warriors to fight on the villagers' behalf, returns with a ragtag crew of misfits who, through cunning and daring, prevail against impossible odds.

Less a remake than a template, really, although Magnificent Seven has long stretches weherein it reinterprets Seven Samurai scene-for scene.

17:47 / 21.09.02

There's a remake of The Incredible Shrinking Man on the way. Directed by the guy responsible for Scary Movie. Written by someone who's only previously had a part in scripting TV comedy shows (Room 101, 2DTV... you get the idea).

Much as this makes me a complete hypocrite after my recent shouty bit in the LoEG film thread, I am utterly horrified by the very idea.

20:26 / 21.09.02

Re: "The Italian Job" remake.
Maybe they have the new Minis, but they are not shooting it in Italy.
They are setting it in LA.
Shouldn't it be called "The Californian Job"?

And let's not forget what's coming up next - Jennifer Lopez in a remake of "Mary Poppins".
Who will take the Dick VanDike part? Puff Daddy?

As for the worst remake of all times, I give my vote to "Wild Wild West".
The TV series was great fun.
The movie is pure unadulterated crap.

Old brown-eye is back

22:18 / 22.09.02

In what horrendous, no-fun universe is A Bug's Life shit? Am I alone here?

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

22:25 / 22.09.02

I think my feelings on "City Of Angels" have already been made obvious to most here... the fact that Wenders actually TOOK THE CASH AND LET THEM DO IT makes me sick...

And as for that Nicholas Cage remake of "The Wicker Man"...

please, someone, wake me up.

Old brown-eye is back

22:35 / 22.09.02

Oh no! Oh Jesus Christ! I'd forgotten they were re-making the WM. (The cosmic balance being restored hopefully with The Riding of the Laddie)

03:25 / 23.09.02

A Bug's Life...as good as Seven Samurai.
A Bug's Life...shit.

Welcome to the thread of delusion.

The Return Of Rothkoid

11:09 / 24.09.02

Having seen the trailer for the new version of Ring, I do have to say that it looks better than expected. Some obvious borrowings from the movie - and I'm not entirely impressed with what I assume is Sadako, on the TV screen in the trailer - but it looks pretty good. If they keep the nu-metal out of it, I might be won over. Won't surpass the original, even though the production values are undoubtedly better, given the cash poured into it.

Someone mentioned that they don't remake bad films. Two words for you: Ocean's 11. Have you seen the original? Fuck. That's why the remake works well - apart form the fact that it's Soderbergh in eye-candy mode; if the original's a steaming pile of ill-acted shite held together with bennies and gaffer tape, then you can't possibly do much worse.

Incidentally: the trailers are up for Red Dragon. And I have to say that it looks OK. It's very informed by the original, I think, just judging from the look of it, and Noonan's Tooth Fairy seems to have definitely rubbed off on Fiennes... I'm intrigued, at least. Hopkins is being played up for the one-liner bit, though some of it's unconvincing. I like the feeling of grit. But we'll see. Hey - at least there can't be the whole l-o-v-e tangent to wring out of this one...

The Return Of Rothkoid

11:13 / 24.09.02

Chubby P: sorry I didn't attribute you earlier. Oops.

Ganesh: yeah, the original of Cape Fear was better. Mitchum! The man arrested for pot-smoking, and who released his own bongo album! Fact. The two things that De Niro did better, though was a) buff the fuck up and b) walk around in a bloodied shirt calling "COUNcillor? Are yew THEAH?" for a couple of minutes. That made the remake worthwhile.

Well, that and the fact that Danny Elfman didn't get his fuckknuckling paws all over Bernard Herrmann's score...

Note for Wicker Man fans: reckon they'll reuse the songs of Magnet? That'd only work if they got Monster Magnet to play them. For some reason, the idea of Dave Wyndorf singing "and on that tree, there was a..." appeals to me greatly, for some reason.

21:21 / 02.10.02

Solaris. No, I haven't seen it yet. Why do you ask?

23:52 / 09.10.02

Paramount Pictures and MTV Films have tapped helmer Tony Scott to go into battle with "The Warriors."

Scott has signed on to direct an updated version of Paramount's 1979 actioner, which centered on Gotham gang battles sparked by a small group of gang members being falsely accused of murdering a peace-seeking leader.

Project is being produced by MTV Films and Scott Free Prods., the shingle headed by Tony Scott and brother Ridley Scott. MTV execs Van Toffler, David Gale and Michael Cole will oversee along with Scott Free execs Anne Lai and prexy of production Liza Ellzey. Par exec VP Brian Witten is the studio exec on the project.

Tony Scott's editor Skip Chaisson will be co-producer. "Skip and I have been in business for many years," Scott said. "Skip's vision inspired me to revisit one of my all-time favorite films."

Scripters John Glenn and Travis Wright were tapped earlier this year to pen the "Warriors" update, which will mesh styles of Hong Kong martial arts pix and contemporary action features.

John Goldwyn, vice chair of the Motion Picture Group and Paramount prexy, said, "We are thrilled to have a director the caliber of Tony Scott at the helm of this project. All of us at Paramount are excited to work with him."

Toffler said, "We have always loved 'The Warriors' and have been nurturing the idea of a remake for some time, while we tried to find a world-class filmmaker to partner with. Tony and Skip's vision for this project is absolutely original, and totally in sync with ours. We couldn't be more excited."
_
Date in print: Wed., Sep. 25, 2002, Los Angeles

NewPickettywitch

14:37 / 11.10.02

A remake of a '60's American TV show, "Bewitched". It will star Nicole Kidman and Mike Myers...

19:43 / 11.10.02

Saw a remake of High Noon the other day. Tom Skerrit as Marshal Kane and Michael Madsen as Frank Miller. It was awful, the anti-McCarthyist context is completely lost, the new Miller is dressed up in black - he's the villain don't you know, and Skerrit bless him never was likely to approach the dignity Coop brought to lead, indeed he doesn't come close. Rather misses Grace Kelly too, as if anybody could substitute for her?
The remake takes a classic psychological western that transcended its genre and rearranges it into a ten-a-penny 70's style good-guy bad-buy TV-movie with a small degree of post Saving Private Ryan production values.
Worst remake ever.

I think I've made my point.

Don't make eye contact

21:42 / 11.10.02

The reason that they make so many sequels is because of all the money involved. Movie executives have to decide to give someone millions to make a film so they want as many reasons to believe that it will make the money back as possible. That's why people make such a fuss about the stars and why films are so often based on books or comics rather than being written for film. So they remake a film because it seems a guarunteed return on the money because everyone loved it the first time. A film being a remake doesn't mean that it can't have a great director or cast or be enjoyable, it just means that it doesn't have the same creativity or originality going into it as the original.

19:09 / 22.01.03

Here's a link to the simultaneous US DVD release of Ring and The Ring. It's all relevant stuf, but particularly the following paragraph:

One of the things that Roy Lee, the head of Vertigo Entertainment, has always wanted to do is to use American remakes to create a market for the release of Asian films on DVD and VHS. It’s hard to get most average filmgoers to pick up a foreign language film, especially if they don’t know what it is. Lee, one of the producers of the American RING, believes that remakes only fuel an audience’s desire to see the original, and on March 4th, Dreamworks is going to put that theory to the test. Personally, I look forward to picking up both releases.

I'd be interested to hear what people think of this way of thinking. To be honest, the American version of Ring is so much glitzier than the original, and I think that an audience who has seen the remake first are likely to see the original's superior understatement and simplicity as poor handling of the material. A nation fed on Hollywood product (no offense intended, I know it's a generalisation) may not take to the ambiguity of Japanese cinema. I'd be interested to see how it pans out.

Old brown-eye is back

19:34 / 22.01.03

The Coens to re-do The Ladykillers? Hurrah!

www.aintitcool.com

Foust is SO authentic

21:31 / 22.01.03

I've finally seen the original Ring (Ringu, for clarity). What can I say? I must be brainwashed by Hollywood, because I thought The Ring was better than Ringu. While the Ringu climax scene where the Noah character bites it was amazing - it didn't cut to Rachel's character at all - I much prefered the distortion of the victim's faces in The Ring.

Ringu cleared up a lot of character motivation issues. Towelhead fills in the holes in the mystery.

The Ring's cursed video was much more like a nightmare to me. Ringu's images were unimpressive, other then the shambling humans.

God bless Kazaa.

00:04 / 23.01.03

Has anyone heard of the live-action Akira currently underway? (shudder....)

00:08 / 23.01.03

Yes. I think I've shuddered a lot elsewhere on the board. It sounds awful. Really, really awful.

Words cannot describe how awful it sounds.

00:10 / 23.01.03

Barry: try pages two and one. My shuddering is therein realised.

08:21 / 23.01.03

This, however, is one remake I am looking forward to.

06:45 / 25.05.06

They are remaking one of my favourite westerns, 3.10 to Yuma with fucking Tom Cruise (I assume in the Glenn Ford role please please God not as the bad guy). The only way this will not make me want to hit people is if they do it Italian Job style (i.e. make completely different film incorporating a couple of superficial refs to the original).

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

16:24 / 25.05.06

I must confess I found the The Hills Have Eyes remake to be better than the original (I've always thought the original was over-rated, though)...
Kind of an exception, though.

16:33 / 25.05.06

Most remakes are pretty bad, especially in comparison to the originals. The new 'Psycho' that totally missed the point? 'Taxi' or 'The Ring' or 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre.' This is true, from 'The Getaway' to (the still pretty good, but as...) 'Cape Fear'. 'The Truth About Charlie' is held at a special level of contempt in my mental film vault.

There are some good ones, though. I have yet to be really disappointed with any film version of 'Red Harvest', from Yojimbo to that one with Bruce Willis. The second time they did 'The Maltese Falcon' it came out better, while the second time they did 'Casablanca' it was... well, it was the second time they did 'Casablanca'.

The upcoming 'New Nonvirgin Wicker Killer Fucking Bees on the Man' I have come to terms with and will pretend, at release, that there hasn't been one.

However, something else has just really got on my nerves, and that's this Will Smith 'I am Legend.' Okeh, nice of them to keep the original title, and since it's based on a nonfilm work that's been filmed before, it's not a remake so much as a different adaptation, however... it's Hollywood. How close to the book and how far from Vincent Price are they actually going to go? Nobody's going to film that book. And as remakes go, taking a role that previously had Vincent Price in it, is just setting yourself up.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

16:37 / 25.05.06

I always thought Romero should do I Am Legend.

21:58 / 25.05.06

(cough)The Wickerman(cough)

00:19 / 26.05.06

When they re-made Casablanca with Pamela Anderson that was wicked, though.

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