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Lord of the Rings: Yeah, it’s okay, but I just don’t see what the B.F.D. is. And too many white people. Even Star Wars had Lando. Yeah, I realize it’s prehistoric Europe, but do all the elves and dwarves have to be white? (Well, maybe the dwarves would be pale from all that time underground, but still.)
Forrest Gump: Now that I come back to it a few years later that feather really pisses me off.
Indiana Jones: One of those films you should never watch after you turn ten.
Speaking of Ralph Fines, has anyone seen “Spider?” I read reviews saying that it had the best acting in a decade, was one of the most well shot films ever, and it was shite. It wasn’t just because I got my hopes up; by any standard. Is this what constitutes great acting? Looking at your shoes and mumbling for an hour and a half? Too bad he wasn’t comatose, he could’ve won an Oscar.
Am I the only one who thinks Twelve Monkeys was tragically flawed? It seemed like it tried too much to be a sci-fi mindfuck and ended up forgoing a coherent story, likable characters, etc. I’ll admit that the twist at the end was interesting, but it was interesting in the abstract way a museum piece is interesting, it didn’t move me at all.
Everybody I talk to hated A.I., but I like it. I’ve never seen a movie change a character so seamlessly. I went from seeing David as nothing more than a robot to the most human character in the film. And that moment when Jude Law said “I am! I was!” Call me an old softie, but it moved me. I thought it provided a great look at, of all things, human consciousness.
I am so glad someone mentioned Donny Darko. Never have I felt like a film wasted ninety minutes of my life moreso than that. And the thing that’s so tragic is it has so many good lines. (see: gangbang smurfette) But the ending just nullifies the entirety of the film and makes me want to bitch slap the director.
Lost in Translation: Yes it seems racist to the uninitiated, but then you study contemporary Japan and realize: Holy shit, it really is like that!
Seven: Yes, it has good atmosphere. But anything that makes you think “Well, that was pointless.” as you walk out of the theatre has issues.
On a final note: Yes, it is easier to criticize than create and if criticizing is the only thing you do you are a douche, but DAMN it feels good to just bitch once in a while. |
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