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This is the thread for people who now have to set fire to their homes.

 
  

Page: 12(3)4

 
 
Triplets
13:11 / 17.07.07
To: anyone who has posted pictures of spiders in this thread. Or anywhere, for that matter.

Subject: You fuckers!

Body: There is a special circle of hell reserved for you, lawyers and nonces, I'm sure.
 
 
electric monk
15:13 / 17.07.07
Triplets,

[+] [-] It is safe in here.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
15:20 / 17.07.07
looks like I got out of Wales just in time. Maybe they'll be dead by the time I get back, not bred and spread.

Dead.

Not Bred and spread.
 
 
Ticker
15:28 / 17.07.07
...or they become so huge and giant the Welsh flag will require four more legs being added to the dragon.
 
 
Triplets
17:27 / 17.07.07
Monk, I hope you are EXTRA CRISPY.
 
 
My Mom Thinks I'm Cool
12:46 / 05.09.07
Bedbugs suck. I think this post ought to go in the "kill it with fire" thread, since that appears to be the only way to get rid of them.

but really - they wouldn't be that bad, if they were just taking my blood. it's not like I need all of it. but just QUIT FUCKING WAKING ME UP!!!!!

anyway. my attempts so far to alleviate the problem have resulted in absolutely nothing. more drastic measures are, supposedly, coming in the mail soon. better be real fucking soon.

the worst part is when I come home a bit late and they're already out, climbing around my bed, looking for me. ah! there you are! we were worried! fuck you guys.

they're all big and fat and happy and red. and I'm why. bleaaagh.
 
 
grant
13:30 / 05.09.07
Are you getting the freshwater diatomaceous earth?

We had to trash a couch....
 
 
My Mom Thinks I'm Cool
13:58 / 05.09.07
the who what? I'll have to look that one up.

I ordered plastic sealing things for the mattress and box springs. I think the plan is to seal them up and the ones inside die and the ones outside can't shack up in my mattress any more. then you clean the hell out of your room and spray poison everywhere, and stick your bed in a moat so they can't get to it.

and then when I get enough money to move out of this dump, I set everything I own on fire so I don't bring them with me.

apparently there is no option of getting the superintendent to hire pest removal people, so no matter what I do they'll probably just come back from the next apartment over.
 
 
Ticker
14:01 / 05.09.07
diatomaceous earth is the best thing ever. Even comes in food grade quality so no worries. Well just don't huff it or rub it in your eyes.

I have it controlling ants in the kitchen. CONTROLLING!!
 
 
My Mom Thinks I'm Cool
14:02 / 05.09.07
http://www.internet-grocer.net/diatome.htm

wow, nice! I may well try to get some of that.

what would be a good way to apply it to a room? my lungs are already slightly prone to asthma/allergy/bronchitis. hmm, more research.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
13:31 / 27.09.07
Number of Flat-Mates I've woken at 1 am with screams of terror this academic year: 1.

But it did only start on Saturday.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
00:47 / 12.11.07
Spider Season seems to have ended a few weeks ago.

I haven't had an October that bad in ages, at one point I had three different Spiders living in my room, and this was after at least two had been removed by flat-mates via the window.

For about two weeks I was feeling imaginary spiders crawling over me on an hourly basis, and waking up screaming most nights, twice I made myself nauseous with nerves.

One morning, a spider ran acros my duvet as I was getting out of bed. Initial thoughts of "If only I'd gotten out of bed 30 seconds earlier" and "If only it was 6 inches further down the bed" very quickly became thoughts of the "how many times are they..." nature.

And yes, I looked at every picture in this thread.

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
 
 
Liger Null
03:20 / 12.11.07
Fruit Flies. Cocky-as-hell fruit flies everywhere, flying into my face while I'm trying to have my cereal. They've even taken up residence in my living room.

Where the hell are these things coming from? I haven't bought bananas in weeks.
 
 
Evil Scientist
06:45 / 12.11.07
Bug zapper dude. It's the only way to be sure.

Had a real bad fly problem in my house a few years back and brought one of those things. The place was insect free in a couple of days.
 
 
Dead Megatron
11:16 / 12.11.07
Talking about spider and home fires:

5-year old boy in Spider-man suit saves baby from fire

Here's a translation of the news piece:

11/09/2007 - 16h23
"Spider-kid" saves baby from burning house in Santa Catarina


Five-year old Riquelme dos Santos saved a 22 month old baby from a fire last Thursday in the city of Palmeira, State of Santa Catarina, Brazil. The most curious part is that the boy was wearing a Spiderman costume during the rescue.

According to witnesses, Riquelme was playing "super-hero" in front of the house when he saw fire coming from the baby's room. The child, called Andrieli, was sleeping inside while her mom, Lucilene dos Santos (Riquelme's aunt) was doing the laundry outside.

According to Lucilene, the fire spread rapidly and she could not get inside to rescue her daughter. At this point, the "Spider-kid" decided to act.

"He told me not to cry or scream, for he would save Andriele", the mother told RBS TV. He then proceed to enter the house, and came out shortly after with the baby in his arms. Both were unharmed.

The Firefighther's squad examined the house this Friday and informed the fire destroyed 80% of the 50 square meters house, which is located in a poor neighborhood.

The boy's attitude was praised by the firefighters, even though it is not recomended. "He could have become another victim," said sargeant Macedo.

Riquelme, who is an orphan who lives with her aunt and cousin, told our reporters he himself wants to be a firefigther when he grows up


I almost posted this on the Happy thread, but the child-endangerment angle prevented me to do so. Plus,this thread was justing asking for this post.
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
11:31 / 12.11.07
Charlie Brooker says that spiders don't like conkers. Don't know if it's true or not.
 
 
Essential Dazzler
11:46 / 12.11.07
Conkers?

We have a weapon. We will not go gentle into that good night.

Charlie Brooker on Spiders NO PICTURES.

If only I could bring myself to kill spiders.
 
 
All Acting Regiment
12:42 / 12.11.07
Once, when I was a student, I was preparing a meal in a hall of residence kitchen when some japester ran in carrying a huge spider he'd found outside. Having made a couple of girls scream, he decided to lunge in my direction. Without even thinking, I swiped at his belly with a kitchen knife in a desperate bid to stave him off. The blade narrowly missed him, which was a shame, because it meant I had to spend the next half-hour listening to him self-righteously bleating about how I must be crazy and he was only having a laugh. I just shrugged. Don't startle someone with a knife in their hand unless you're prepared to face the consequences, moron. Next time I'll go for the eyes.

Yeah, Brooker's funny, I ...

What's that ...


*



*




Look!




*




*
 
 
CameronStewart
13:03 / 12.11.07
You guys have seen the Clock Spider, right?
 
 
Essential Dazzler
13:15 / 12.11.07
Right, that's it. I'm not buying Seaguy 2.
 
 
iamus
13:20 / 12.11.07
Charlie Brooker on Spiders


Ahhhhh! See I really like spiders!

Stoatie's totally going to hammer me.
 
 
Dead Megatron
13:41 / 12.11.07
I'm with iamus. Spiders eat bugs and anything that eats bugs(more specifically, blood-sucking mosquitos) is OK in my book

It is similar to my reason why I like snakes: they eat rats.
 
 
grant
19:21 / 05.03.08
Look, really, they're harmless and even fun, OK?
 
 
grant
16:56 / 29.04.08
More, bigger reptiles.

ON WHICH TO FEED.
 
 
electric monk
17:22 / 29.04.08
Yeeps!

And since you bumped...



A hefty black racer snake has taken up residence in my yard. My Lovely Wife alerted me to its presence on Saturday. I met it an hour later as I stepped out into the side yard. I'm standing under our big ficus tree, about to light a cigarette and wondering if I'll come across the bugger when one of the roots MOVED and I realized I was standing about four feet from a (approximately) three-foot long snake. It lifted it's head up, turned to look me square in the eye, and made these undulating movements with the section of body that was up off the ground. I just stared and stood very still. It finally moved off into some undergrowth. Later, we found his hidey-hole near our front walk.

I am told that the undulating movements are part of a threat assessment. I must not be a huge threat to large snakes.
 
 
Liger Null
00:28 / 04.05.08
It lifted it's head up, turned to look me square in the eye, and made these undulating movements with the section of body that was up off the ground.

Squeeee!!! They're so cute when they do that!
 
 
Withiel: DALI'S ROTTWEILER
03:15 / 05.05.08
This horrible creature appears to have moved into the home of my partner and many of my close friends. A pernicious beast, prone to self-satisfaction and corruption, it's got to the stage where it almost seems to run the place. I mean, I know some claim it's adorable and harmless really, but I've heard it's closely related to the Tory Mamba of Parliament and actually remarkably vicious.
What I'm asking, I suppose, is are there any forms of pest control useful against Torius Horribilis Mayoriensis, or is it time to move out and wait for it to find somewhere else to torment?
 
 
grant
21:57 / 05.06.08
Beautiful:



 
 
Triplets
01:28 / 06.06.08
You're a fucking arsehole.
 
 
Triplets
01:32 / 06.06.08
Actually no, really, Grant, some people, particularly myself, have a big dose of arachnophobia and really, really, don't need that kind of shit posted around Barbelith, so kindly keep that in mind in future. FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

DUDE.
 
 
grant
03:47 / 06.06.08
I guess you missed the first page?
 
 
Mistoffelees
07:30 / 06.06.08
Oh, she´s cute! First we had hobbit, and now we get smurf spiders. That would give Azrael something to chew on!
 
 
Less searchable M0rd4nt
07:31 / 06.06.08
Muppet spiders!
 
 
Triplets
09:15 / 06.06.08
God I'm a loud drunk. Apologies.
 
 
grant
04:08 / 07.06.08
Oh.





Does that mean I'll have to call them off, then?
 
  

Page: 12(3)4

 
  
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