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Lines you've stolen and plan to use at the nearest opportune moment

  
  

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Tuna Ghost: Pratt knot hero
05:43 / 21.09.06
Here's a line I stole from Chinatown: "I like my nose, [person I'm addressing]. I like breathing through it." I used it at work not long ago and nobody knew I totally ripped it off.

I just saw this one: "I once got dumped so hard I didn't have a shadow for a week." I saw it at ScaryGoRound.com, but it sounds like dude stole it from somewhere. I think I've heard it before. But you can substitute "dumped" for just about anything, which means I won't have to wait long for an opportunity to use it.
 
 
pointless & uncalled for
07:15 / 21.09.06
" And I for one welcome our * overlords".

Nicked from the Simpsons and used to varying comic effect, often in business meetings.
 
 
Ex
07:56 / 21.09.06
'It's a metaphor, but what's it a metafor?'
Used often, origin obscure - anyone recognise it?
 
 
Jub
08:25 / 21.09.06
that would be an ecumenical matter.
 
 
Evil Scientist
08:48 / 21.09.06
You will be exterminated! Exterminate! EXTERMINATE!!!
 
 
ONLY NICE THINGS
08:53 / 21.09.06
"This is a good idea. There's no way this isn't a good idea..."

I'm not actually sure if this is from Peep Show or not, but I nicked it from Vincennes, who suggested it in response to my comment, while watching (God help us) Doom, that the first-person sections would be massively improved if they had the voice of David Mitchell providing a running internal monologue.
 
 
Mistoffelees
09:09 / 21.09.06
In another thread on a movie forum, they were talking about those ridiculous science fiction problem solving explanations (as in star trek for example), that often were some lazy incrompehensible deus ex machina lines, and one did a spoof, that can be put to proper use:

"Obviously Abraham Lincoln came back to life and killed Big Bird to close the worm hole."


And I also like this exchange:
- I saw you downloading those pics to your computer.

- Yeah, so I could print them out and burn them!
 
 
lonely as a cloud...
09:11 / 21.09.06
"Life is pain, (person I'm addressing), and anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is selling something."
 
The Dread Pirate Roberts' words of wisdom, which I use liberally.
 
 
Shrug
09:39 / 21.09.06
"In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me."

Harvey.

"I always have a wonderful time, wherever I am, whomever I'm with."

Harvey.

So many feel-good witticisms.
 
 
Saturn's nod
09:57 / 21.09.06
"social interactions will cease!"
 
 
Jack Vincennes
10:30 / 21.09.06
Haus -yes, straight out of Peep Show!

My favourite stolen line (spoken quietly to the person sitting next to me on the plane during the oxygen mask demonstration) is For all the good it'll do you at that point, you may as well wear it as a little yellow hat. I think it's from a Q Magazine 'Top Ten' about a decade ago.
 
 
miss wonderstarr
10:45 / 21.09.06
I managed to actually use this line from Aliens in conversation recently, and someone else can have it now:

Nuke it from space. It's the only way to be sure.

What made me even k3wler is that the guy I said it to recognised the line halfway through and tried to get in with the second part, but was too slow. Ahh! burn!!!
 
 
electric monk
11:42 / 21.09.06
"I don't care if you were joking" is going to come in very handy today. Props to id entity for that one.
 
 
Ninjas make great pets
12:05 / 21.09.06
that money was just resting in my account

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Holy shit covered baseball bats

Ooooo, [name], can of petrol, and a match... wooof! (shamelessly stolen from a lither)
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
12:09 / 21.09.06
wonderstarr: isn't it "dust off and nuke the site from orbit etc..."

I love that line. I probably say it more than anything else, including "hello".
 
 
Ticker
12:20 / 21.09.06
I would, but I'm paralyzed with not caring very much.
 
 
lonely as a cloud...
12:22 / 21.09.06
Introduced a friend of mine to Spaced... now she can't stop saying "(subject)...I like it, I think it's good".
 
 
matthew.
13:10 / 21.09.06
Whenever somebody I know fucks up, I say

*loud shouty police chief voice*
Magarnicle! Get in here! Give me your badge and gun! You're off the case! Learn to play by the rules! You're too close to this case!

Or any number of cop-shows cliches. I took it from an early episode of The Simpsons.
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
13:16 / 21.09.06
"Slappyhappyasboswithringtones?"

or

"Computer says no."

or

"Fantastic! Absolutely fantastic."

or

"Look, (insert name here) will never make the cover of Sanity Fair...."
 
 
Elijah, Freelance Rabbi
14:39 / 21.09.06
I'd rather a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

It's like blowing up a balloon and something bad happens!

We have all seen too many body bags and ball sacks.

ahh Futurama, so funny.
 
 
Psych Safeling
15:14 / 21.09.06
Liar! You've got antifreeze!
 
 
Kali, Queen of Kitteh
15:38 / 21.09.06
Oh, yes, and this is one I say all the time, inexplicably.

"Go Team Venture!"
 
 
Glandmaster
16:01 / 21.09.06
Im gonna go beat my dick like it owes me money.

Dave Chappelle (probably)
 
 
miss wonderstarr
16:01 / 21.09.06
wonderstarr: isn't it "dust off and nuke the site from orbit etc..."

Interesting point, Stoatie. When I googled the phrase "nuke it from space..." I got enough responses to think that I had the wording right, but perhaps it's mutated and been cited more often incorrectly than correctly (cf. "Play it again, Sam")?

I'm surprised you find so many occasions to use this wonderful phrase!
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
16:07 / 21.09.06
perhaps it's mutated and been cited more often incorrectly than correctly

That could also be a reason for me possibly being the one to have it wrong, now I come to think of it... must watch the movie again. It's the only way to be sure, after all...
 
 
STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK
16:09 / 21.09.06
Hmm... I've just tried Googling "nuke the site from orbit" and there are loads there too!

Unfortunately, most of them say "TAKE" off. "DUST" off sounds WAY cooler.
 
 
Mistoffelees
16:35 / 21.09.06
I took screenshots, so here it is:




  
 
Mistoffelees
16:44 / 21.09.06
Made a last one, for closure purposes.
 
 
Axolotl
17:30 / 21.09.06
And I just stole it and used it in some IM chat.
 
 
Olulabelle
17:43 / 21.09.06
Made a last one, for closure purposes

Mist, that's very funny. Very funny indeed!
 
 
Jawsus-son Starship
17:43 / 21.09.06
Seems to be the only true way to answer a phone -

"JLB fuck off please!"
 
 
Feverfew
18:17 / 21.09.06
I keep wanting to slip the phrase laissez-bear into conversation somehow to describe the give-and-take between people on the hairier side of love.

And I must have heard it somewhere, because in fluffy-deity-of-choice's name, why would it have just occurred to me?
 
 
stabbystabby
22:07 / 21.09.06
From spaced (so many though):

Skip to the end.

That was for research!
 
 
stabbystabby
22:16 / 21.09.06
oh, and:

Abstract expressionism is so mid-to-late eighties.
 
 
Cailín
22:21 / 21.09.06
I've got great eyes! They're better than 20/20 and they're blue!
 
  

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