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Underground > Games & Gameplay >

Barbelith Fantasy Football - the Premiership (aka THE BEST LEAGUE IN THE WORLD!!111)

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23:39 / 24.08.06

i just picked some players i liked then realised i was running out of money and couldn't buy three midfielders and a fullback for 3.0. oops, start again...

seems too much trouble to actually follow every player on every team just to get a few more points. well, any points. just making a point. or not.

[shuts up, gets back in box]

19:17 / 09.09.06

Hurrah for me!

Even though I gave you lads a head start, that's been clawed back and overcome this very day. Things start to look interesting if you check the graphs, though, mind; Suede's Swangtacular FC - after their frankly risible start to the season are (just ahead of my own Red Ultras) the league's form team, due to his Sir Harold of Redknapp-like transfer dealings.

More points to come in yet, but it's looking good. Also, in shock developments: Henry benched for next week! Andy 'Andrew' Johnson to replace as captain!

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:48 / 09.09.06

Hee!

I just know as soon as I drop Reina that Liverpool are magically going to remember how to defend or something. It's so hard to know whether to keep faith in these guys... Thierry I love you, but can Arsenal please remember how to score? A lot? You shall keep my unwavering faith! Reina I already meant to get rid of you. You sadden me.

Bed I don't mean to upset you but you know Friedal would have netted you a crazy 21 points if he wasn't sitting on your bench, right? Just sayin'. I hate that stuff. I'm sure I was supposed to have Johnson playing...

Remind me to get rid of Wayne Bridge (even though I secretly think he'd be better than Ashley Cole anyway, I fear he won't play as much).

06:04 / 10.09.06

and like palace in real life, start out in a blaze of glory and then... well, nothing at all, really.

do villa and hammers play sunday in this gameweek? i've got options on the park if they do... look out and tremble at the might that is .... plastic palace!

..or, not.

13:34 / 10.09.06

Aye, they do. I'm kinda torn, as often happens, given I've Benayoun and Sorensen (also Paintsil, but he appears injured so I've shipped him out for Linvoy Primus, the only Prem player named after a stove, for next week.) Ideally, I'd like Sorensen to save three penalties and score a goal, I suppose.

17:50 / 10.09.06

This is well better than TV eh?!

20:04 / 10.09.06

?

You should sign up, if you're interested, trips.

20:11 / 10.09.06

There's like a weekly championship. Everyone's won it, except Bedhead, and surely his time can't be far away.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

09:36 / 17.09.06

I can't help thinking of this man when you do well, Falcon.

23:10 / 17.09.06

bollocks to ballack. minus four, indeed! but uber ultras!! ultra - acheivers, what...

what a motley crew i chose. at least the real palace had a win!

11:44 / 21.09.06

I'm actually back safe ensconced in big Dunc's home city as of now; there are stories about him, you know.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

13:09 / 23.09.06

Yep, knew it, as soon as I drop Reina - two clean sheets.

12:15 / 26.09.06

Yeah, I just shuffled Henry and Sheva for a week (because the f'ing thing said Thierry was injured) to the same effect. He's back now, though. Waste of my weekly transfer, though.

Who's Will is gr8, btw? Preston?

00:38 / 16.10.06

geez i'm crap. and now cech is out with a crook head. all i've got left in goal is reina. help...

might try to find some time to do a transfer or two this week... how often do you others transfer, if i can eek some strategy from you??

'cause i'm crap as palace!

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

10:09 / 24.10.06

Hee. I'm catching ya, Dunc!

ps. Bed Hed, does this make you love little Defoe even more?

"When the West Ham player fouled me, I reacted in a bit of a mischievous way - my character is a little like that at times."

A comical nibble!

12:35 / 24.10.06

He is a cheeky young scamp! Aww.

18:17 / 25.10.06

I'm in.

22:00 / 12.11.06

Gah! How did I miss this thread being posted to? How did Suede get within a single point of me?! How did I know exactly whose the team mentioning Forest was?!?!?

I've played my wild card, after seeing my healthy lead whittling away in worrying Keegan-era Newcastle fashion - just hope it ain't 'Tino Asprilla equivalents I've signed. Only used four transfers, eh - kinda want Drogba, but brought in Bent for Yakubu, because I'm just totally unwilling to part with either Johnson or Henry.

Brilliantly enough, chunky former Motherwell man Lee McCulloch has scored in both weeks after I sold him. That's when you know shit's fucking up.

22:02 / 12.11.06

Oh, astro, I normally find time in my week for at least one exchange; there's always someone you fancy a bit, you know? Quite how that explains ending up with Phil Neville, as I have, is beyond me. Carn't even blame the drink and drugs for that one!!

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:14 / 12.11.06

I was very annoyed because I was just about to bring Drogs in for this week, and he goes and gets hisself a hattrick... dammit.

I'm not sure I'm gonna go for him now... but oooh! I'm on your heels, Falco, nipping at you like a croc! AND I'M HUNGRY.

I have no idea what I'm saying. Imagine this post spoken in the style of Paul Merson, perhaps.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:16 / 12.11.06

PS. I'VE GOT A PLAN!!!

PPS. It might turn out to be rubbish!

23:29 / 12.11.06

I can only imagine Paul 'Merse' Merson's voice if it's the wavering, tearful confession about, well, the drink and drugs.

Tell us your plan, Suede; may as well, it's not like anyone can stop you doing it. Or do you fear THE COPYISTS?

11:49 / 14.11.06

A couple of canny moves in the market and I'll soon have my injury plagued squad catching you fellows up

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:09 / 18.11.06

Well, my plan went to all buggery! I accidentally, while testing out transfers and seeing how many points they'd cost me... um... made four. And not the ones I was dead set on. And lost 12 points. *ahem* So anyway, there goes my carefully thought out tactical plan.

Which had included Darren Bent, same as you - although I do wonder how Dowie's departure and the essential DODGY FEELING of Charlton is going to be affecting him now. January, Darren, January!

Still, now my long term plan is gone, it would have probably turned in to pish anyway seeing as every week I'd see players I hadn't been able to sign yet (lest I lost points for too many transfers) score hattricks and the like, and the price keep going up and up... while I miss all the choice form! See: Tim Cahill. One average game and one beaut injury.

Obviously Tezza Henrique will now go and score a bazillion goals and I will weep, but what can you do?

Also Dunc, I think you have stumbled on to the Lescott bonus secret! He seems to get at least 2 bonus points every game! I was going to go for him as well, but I can't remember why I didn't... also the same for Joey Barton, but I reasoned that I had enough Man City players already.

And Vidic! He was part of my plan. And possibly Drogba, although I reasoned that after a hattrick there'd be no point getting him and seemingly jumping on that bandwagon.

Well, here's to having no plan and losing 12 points! Wheee!

I miss my plan.

17:36 / 19.11.06

What's the bonus thing again? Is that when you're the best player on your team? I think I brought Lescott in early on, was gonna use him from the start, but thought he mightn't play due to octogenarian David Weir being the club's offish captain.

17:57 / 19.11.06

offish = official

Quite a good week that, and a bit of a cushion regained thanks to yr -12, suede. I've brought Trabelsi back in now he's playing, because I've seen him nuff times for Tunisia, always being a really forward minded defender and their bestest player. Should see some assists and stuff and City's defence seems decent also.

18:00 / 19.11.06

Other questions - who is Will Chatters, and why does he have a league of eight teams all played by him? Has bedhead given up, or could he simply not bear to ever part company with injured Dean Ashton?

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

18:07 / 26.11.06

AND IT'S ALL LEVEL!

Minus 12 point cushion indeed!

I think there's a bonus of 1-3 points handed out to the best three players on the pitch, Falc.

I am tempted by Mellberg's beard, but I already have too many Villa players.

23:19 / 26.11.06

Fuck, that's the shits right up me now. (Excuses in early dept: 'you had a week headstart')

Just not gelling for the Red Ultras atm, so Drogba - IN!, injured Henry - OUT!

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

22:58 / 29.11.06

And it's a ten point leeeeead-ah!

Now comes the times where I regret not having Henry and Drogba, surely... and if I get Joey Barton Man City will stop scoring so many goals.

23:37 / 29.11.06

Right, squeaky bum time = no more tips for you lot. I will talk about my very clever plan for this forthcoming week after it has hopefully been a giant success, oh-ho.

I think Benny's stealing in, too. Nip and tuck. Concerning.

16:00 / 28.12.06

78 points! Ooh, Linvoy, how I wish I'd made you Boxing Day cap-i-tan with your 17 pt haul. Nonetheless, it is most definitely on now, Suede and - I might add - you have been served this week. To use an analogy that in fact no-one on Barbelith will appreciate, it's a bit like the titanic struggle at the top end of the SPL 'tween Aberdeen and Rangers for that vital second Champs League spot. A bit. (And actually, we're both in the top third of the 1.5 million people playing, which came as a surprise - I thought I was around halfway down. Admittedly many may have simply given up - e.g. Bedhead - or are utterly incompetent, but it's nice to know you're better than at least a million players.)

Not happy with this week, I've since made three transfers at a cost of eight points - goodbye relegation-bound Darren Bent, injured John Terry and useless Phil Neville; hello top pointscorer Cristiano Ronaldo, on fire Nic Anelka (I did have to weigh up betwen him and Obafemi Martins - but Oba polays for a poorer team and is more costly, I reasoned) and, uhm, cheap at the price Graeme Murty (I do like to have Scotland internationals.) I expect to break the hundred point barrier sometime soon with this new, awesome line-up.

06:37 / 29.12.06

that's a heck of a gap up there - I'm not one to stare at my shuffling shoes and talk about injuries to the team - basically because if you actually utilise the transferal system this shouldn't be an issue - but at five injured players! - anyway, we've a good squad, I expect the boys to bounce back and it's early days yet, but we will be there, or there abouts come what may etc...

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

13:21 / 30.12.06

A-ha! I'm quite enjoying this.

You know, just as soon as I get rid of Linvoy (because, y'know, I have the two top scoring Pompey defenders), there he is scoring his first goal in two years... twice! Ha. I should have known. I like Primus, as well. I really should have known better than to get rid of the man who gives David James a cute little hug after narrowly avoiding an own goal.

And if ONLY I'd had Cristiano as captain for these past two gameweeks, I'd be soaring up there as well! Your changes are very similar to what I was about to do, Dunc... but you know, I think I might just go out risky style! I love to make transfers, and it's no fun unless it's dangerous and I lose many points! Ha.

Oh yes. I've got some tricks up my sleeves, boyo! Althugh on reflection this risky strategy of dropping 28 points on transfers may be foolish. Don't we get a January transfer window?

22:06 / 30.12.06

Yeah, you'd think. I always get a bit rueful after transferring boys out* - the feeling's not helped when Phillip donkey Neville hits his first goal in four years and Pardew's maybe helping Bent turn a corner, but on balance I think my decisions were merited, given Terry had to be dumped. What wasn't was NOT making Cristiano captain, but I figured Drogs, at home, against Fulham of all teams (I really don't rate) might have a field day. But C. Ron for doppelpointen henceforth, I think.

*Not so much that I've not swapped everyone, iirc, except reserve goalie Chris Kirkland since the start of the season.

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