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Shut Up Gaiman [PICS]

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All Acting Regiment

09:25 / 10.12.05

Okay, over here we've got stuff about Christopher Robin being made a girl and Gaiman not liking and someone says we should have a Shut Up Gaiman Thread.

So here it is.

Really, I just want to hear other 'lithers articulate their dislike so I can better order my own bile. Go ahead! Mutilate!

■

12:39 / 10.12.05

He's a very nice man who knows a lot about Doctor Who and whose work is slightly too whimsical for some people. That's about my limit. Next!

Ganesh

12:50 / 10.12.05

I'm finding it somewhat problematic not knowing whether or not Gaiman has a hott/wunnerful wife. This makes it difficult for me to gauge his level of success.

I expect the blouson gets in the way during swingball, too.

Alex's Grandma

13:42 / 10.12.05

Well he allegedly once spent a magical, star-crossed night with Tori Amos, if that's any indication.

Our Lady Has Left the Building

16:28 / 10.12.05

He's annoyingly written one of the best fantasy series that Vertigo ever put out. Admittedly his competition is Seekers Into the Mystery so that's not much. He's also written Shoggoth's Old Peculiar, yet another entry in the already overcrowded cannon of 'Lovecraft crossed with Pete 'n' Dud' stories.

Sorry, I'm really struggling to find anything to dislike about the guy.

paranoidwriter waves hello

16:58 / 10.12.05

Ditto. My early teens would have been all the shitter without 'The Sandman', and even all these years later, the older I get the more I learn come to appreciate and respect Mr Gaiman's talent. Also, a good friend of mine says her two ankle-biters love 'Wolves in the Walls', and, in my humble opinion, that's high praise indeed.

Billuccho!

17:00 / 10.12.05

He's a big Douglas Adams fan. I'm obligated to like him.

Er, I mean, he's a tosser, eh?

w1rebaby

17:18 / 10.12.05

I thought it was Gaimanites and Gaimanoids who were the problem.

lekvar

17:36 / 10.12.05

His taste in leather coats is pretty bad.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

17:59 / 10.12.05

You guys really haven't gotten the hang of this thread now, have you?

Let me show you.

"Hullo London."

"Hullo John Constantine."

"How are you then, London?"

"All right. Full of people. Raining. You?"

Constantine's internal dialogue, in SANDMAN #3: "Dream a Little Dream of Me"

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

"Things need not have happened to be true. Tales and adventures are the shadow truths that will endure when mere facts are dust and ashes and forgotten"

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

There need be no rationale. Surrender to the joy of telling Gaiman to shut up, however you may wish. And remember kids - it's fun to tell anyone to shut up! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Haus of Mystery

19:06 / 10.12.05

That's the spirit!

So, Morpheus appears differently according to your culture/religion/what have you. OK. But his true form, as with his alliterative siblings, is as a bunch of fucking pasty goths.

SHUT UP GAIMAN!

electric monk

19:38 / 10.12.05

What has resulted from pulling 'Neverwhere' off the shelf and opening to a page at random:

Richard ran to catch up. "Let's see..." said de Carabas. "I'll need to get her to the market. The next one's in, mm, two days' time, if I recall correctly, as of course I unfailingly do. I can hide her until then."

"Market?" asked Richard.

"The Floating Market. But you don't want to know about that. No more questions."

You're right. I don't.

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

electric monk

19:48 / 10.12.05

And thank you, Suedey, for getting us on track here.

I promise I will post, at least, the script for strip I wrote wherein Gaiman (shut up!) and Alan Moore play the roles of those two dogs from th old WB cartoons.

Mistoffelees

20:03 / 10.12.05

Yeah, Alan, make Gaiman shut up.

8===>Q: alyn

22:31 / 10.12.05

SHUT UP CLIVE BARKER

Ganesh

22:50 / 10.12.05

Anansi Boys. It sounds like *chuckle* Nancy Boys, do you see?

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

(Ooh, that did feel good.)

Mourne Kransky

22:54 / 10.12.05

Aye, GET A HAIRCUT GAIMAN!

Slim

23:43 / 10.12.05

I think Gaiman is a pretty decent writer, I'm not sure where all this hostility is coming from.

Ganesh

23:54 / 10.12.05

I'd say it amounts to little spikes of hostility, usually in response to the particular brand of whimsy which tends to thread even Gaiman's best work, and sometimes ruins it altogether.

Suedey! SHOT FOR MEAT!

00:32 / 11.12.05

If it helps, I'd tell Grant Morrison or Alan Moore to shut up as well.

Hell, we could even quote that whole infamous post "Grant" made in the comics forum. SHUT UP, MORRISON! Or practically anything Alan Moore says. Just because it's funny. Because he's pompous.

But for some reason none of that works as well as

SHUT UP GAIMAN!

It's a bit like kicking a kitten (or indeed, glassing it). Only that kitten is a twee goth.

Mazarine

00:55 / 11.12.05

"Harold Bloom is a twerp."

Oh fuck off.

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

8===>Q: alyn

01:41 / 11.12.05

Hi Sally!

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

04:56 / 11.12.05

"I've done this great comic. It's called 1602".

SHUT UP, GAIMAN!

Shut UP, Gaiman!

Neil Gaiman once bought me Indian for lunch. He talked quite a lot, but, apart from the 1602 line above, I'd feel bad telling him to shut up....

Our Lady Has Left the Building

15:09 / 11.12.05

Neil Gaiman did not write any of the books of the Bible. Even the ones the Catholic Church doesn't like.

SHUTT UP GAIMAN!

Neil Gaiman has not designed any great buildings in France OR Germany.

STUP TO GAIMAN!

He has yet to produce a viable cure for cancer.

GAIMAN! BAD DOG!

He's never been to the moon.

WJAT YOU TALKIN' BOUT GAIMAN?

And so on...

Less searchable M0rd4nt

18:24 / 11.12.05

This is not Mr. Gaiman's fault, but he is partly responsible for some dreadfully ill-concieved majik!!s over the years, specifically in the 'half-arsed-evocation' class. However, I think Terry Pratchett must take Best In Show for that kind of thing, and will therefor ask him to SHUT UP instead.

Ganesh

18:27 / 11.12.05

And also, I suspect, for providing the basic plot template (everyone couples up by the end) for Anansi Boys (*chortle* - that still gets me), in every single one of his Discworld books.

SHUT UP, PRATCHETT!

Shrug

03:35 / 12.12.05

Apparently Gaiman wrote a short story titled The Problem with Susan which detailed the story of Susan Pevensie long after the conclusion of the C.S Lewis novels.
Is there a slight possibility that it's any good?
Or should I just not bother and skip to telling him SHUT UP?

Mourne Kransky

07:39 / 12.12.05

The best policy, Double, would be to say, like Jack Straw might, SHUTT UP AS FAR AS IS POSSIBLE, GAIMAN, whilst actually carrying on doing whatever you like when unobserved.

I'd like to hear what happened to Susan after she descended into the moral Hell of lipstick and boys. I'd be even keener to hear what happened to Peter and Edmund after etc.

All Acting Regiment

07:42 / 12.12.05

I always thought entering Narnia is a bit like entering a vagina while it's engaged in nitercourse. A bit. Secret cupboard, with the thing that's actually jesus fighting the other thing.

I'll get me coat.

All Acting Regiment

07:42 / 12.12.05

Nitercourse? Shut Up, Legba Rex!

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

09:31 / 12.12.05

However, I think Terry Pratchett must take Best In Show for that kind of thing, and will therefor ask him to SHUT UP instead.

The wonderful thing about TEH INTERNETS, though, Mordant, is you don't have to choose!

You can tell them BOTH to shut up AT THE SAME TIME!!!

Like this-

SHUT UP GAIMAN!!! AND YOU, PRATCHETT- SHUT IT!!! AND GET RID OF THAT HAT. IT LOOKS STUPID.

Shrug

10:06 / 12.12.05

Xoc: Your undoubtably right really. So(here goes): SHUT UP AS FAR AS FUCKING POSSIBLE GAIMAN!

Mourne Kransky

10:18 / 12.12.05

Yeah, TAKE THE HAT OFF, PRATCHETT!

Who do you think you are? Somerset Maugham? The long and venerable history of charming English eccentricity is not the same thing as wearing a stupid fucking hat.

And, besides, you're upsetting the Stoat.

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