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I have invented a new martial art...come and practice!

 
  

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Scrambled Password Bogus Email
09:33 / 24.10.05
This high art is called Fu Dan Ti.

It is structured acoording to an eight course discipline culminating in the near superhuman Grand Master stance known as Mr. Kipling's Wayward Surprise...it could be a honey crunch fondant, or it might be steel bolts through your cheeks...you just never know with the Wayward Surprise Style.

Initiates begin with a crash course in Rooibus and Lapsang Souchong Standing Repose, progressing to the more physical French Fondant Fu Style.

Please apply within for your starter pack.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
12:26 / 24.10.05
Do not fear the Fu Dan Ti. Its nature is sustenance.

Ignore it at your peril.
 
 
Mistoffelees
14:33 / 24.10.05
Can I learn it, while lying on my comfy couch?
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
14:53 / 24.10.05
This is the preferred opening stance. Beginners are encouraged to don slippers and listen to music. You may want a friend to join you, as progress is made far quicker within the Fu Dan Ti school as a group, although individual / solo practice is not frowned upon.
 
 
Axolotl
15:24 / 24.10.05
Sounds like my kind of martial art.
I am ready to learn my sensei. *Dons dressing gown in preperation*
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
15:33 / 24.10.05
Is this the parent discipline of that notorious art Kris Pan Shok Latt?
 
 
All Acting Regiment
16:00 / 24.10.05
Hmmph. Consider this a warning. I turned up at the dojo only to find a bunch of pirates swaggering about. If you're keeping that kind of company, my ninja associates and I will no doubt be keeping our distance, Bub.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
17:16 / 24.10.05
Fu Dan Ti is beyond such discrimination, acknowledging as it does the non-duality of the pirate-ninja Oneness that Feast and Slurp at the table of Kip Ling.

Hoi!
 
 
■
17:20 / 24.10.05
Is it compatible with the teachings of Krum Pet and Tao Nut?
 
 
Jack Fear
17:31 / 24.10.05
(Gosh, those Johnny Foreigner types do talk all a bit funny, don't they? And occasionally some of their words sound rather like proper words—I say, it's all a bit of a giggle, isn't it?)
 
 
Bard: One-Man Humaton Hoedown
17:36 / 24.10.05
Money $hot, your Fu Dan Ti is no match to my Ki Shen Fu!
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
17:51 / 24.10.05
(Perhaps the fun is being poked at those who take up martial arts simply because they sound 'exotic' etc.? Not at the words themselves. That's a bit of a stretch though, innit... I just posted without thinking, sorry if offence caused)
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
08:18 / 25.10.05
Has this thread offended you, Jack? Do you feel that we are all, casually or otherwise, perpetuating a racist agenda with our %callous, mocking fun%? Our lazy, downtrodden minds that so thoughtlessly and mercilessly enjoy a bit of silly wordplay on a long Monday afternoon?

I will immediately instigate a program of Fu Dan Ti seppuku involving re-inforced Battenburg and Ginseng. It's going to be messy, but should strike a blow right at the heart of the nationalistic xenophobic hardcore that have infiltrated Barbelith.

After, you throw the party. Be sure to post pictures! (Or will you syndicate them to Hello!??)
 
 
Char Aina
08:42 / 25.10.05
isnt it just a variation on the bart simpson school of prank calls?
words that written look like one thing and said are another?
would it help if you could find amanda huggenkis, jack?
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
09:06 / 25.10.05
No, he needs to see Dr. Armand Legge, the sense of humour bypass has gone well, but the anti-pomposity medication is going to need a higher dose prescription.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
09:21 / 25.10.05


 
 
pointless & uncalled for
12:36 / 25.10.05
No Money Shot, it's "mount the face" not face the mount.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
12:46 / 25.10.05
Wot an Arse...
 
 
Triplets
14:31 / 25.10.05
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
15:07 / 25.10.05
Threadrot!

Although deflating the ego with humour is a fairly high adept level of Fu Dan Ti. My dojo overflows with skilled students. Pirate Ninjas all.

This pleaseth me.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
15:23 / 25.10.05
OK, Jack's let off, cos I hadn't been in policy for a while, and didn't know there was an air of doom about some instances of ruff and ready racism in other areas of the board...

Don't think this thread qualifies, though, personally.

Huggles?
 
 
Jack Fear
16:21 / 25.10.05
Moderators?

Can we change the title of this thread to "But It's *Funny* When *I* Do It," please?
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
16:44 / 25.10.05
Ok, Jack, could you explain your objection to the thread, referencing the abstract and first post, just so I actually understand your position, which right now I don't.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
16:47 / 25.10.05
Please?
 
 
Papess
17:05 / 25.10.05
Martial arts are not specific to any one race or culture. I don't see the problem. If it is about some of the terms being coined in this thread as having some vague reference to certain asian languages then let's rid Barbelith of the term "web-fu" right now.
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
17:54 / 25.10.05
Do we have to? I like it. Is it causing offence?
 
 
Scrambled Password Bogus Email
17:58 / 25.10.05
Can we change the title of this thread to "But It's *Funny* When *I* Do It," please?

What? What are you referring to? If you mean that you think this thread is unfairly stereotyping and denigrating a specific set of human beings unfairly based on their creed, colour, race, nationality or sexuality or something else (the way they speak), could you explain it to me, please? 'Cos if it is, I'll personally move for it to be deleted, as that was (fairly obviously, I think) neither the intention nor subtext (if there is one)...Who is being degraded? Where is the slur?
 
 
Papess
18:04 / 25.10.05
It is an example, Money $hot, of asian-flavoured colloquialism that is commonly used here and accepetable to the Barbelith palate of political correctness. My point is, if that is acceptable, then this thread should be also.

Also, if this thread is a problem, then maybe some self respecting Berber's would take issue with the Barbarian thread.
 
 
■
18:09 / 25.10.05
I was wondering when someone was going to put a stop to the gross stereotyping of Scandinavians, too.
 
 
miss wonderstarr
19:16 / 25.10.05
If you mean that you think this thread is unfairly stereotyping and denigrating a specific set of human beings unfairly based on their creed, colour, race, nationality or sexuality or something else (the way they speak), could you explain it to me, please?

I don't see why it needs explaining that making up English phrases that sound "Chinese", needing a funny "Chinese" accent for the joke to work, denigrates (or at least mocks) a set of human beings based on the way they speak.

Comparisons to "web-fu" are irrelevant. Satirical comments about other threads being offensive to barbarians do not seem a good defence.

The joke on this thread has a precedent in circular emails like this one:


Learning Chinese will never be this easy. Read them out loud...

1) That's not right ......... Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive?..... Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP..........Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man ..............Dum Gai
5) Small Horse ............Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the beach? .........Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table ........Ai Bang Mai Ni
8) I think you need a face lift .......Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here .....Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet ......Wai Yu Mun Ching?
11) This is a tow away zone .......No Pah King
12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week ..........Wai Yu Kum Nao?
13) Staying out of sight .........Lei Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile ..... Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive .......Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great .....Fa Kin Su Pah


I don't see a lot of difference between the gags in this thread, and in my pasted-in example. This example may seem more clearly offensive, but I think they're built on the same idea.

I think it could be debated whether the business on this thread is only gently mocking and so doesn't deserve heavy condemnation, but I find it hard to believe you can't understand why it might seem borderline-acceptable.
 
 
miss wonderstarr
19:45 / 25.10.05
To be fair, in my opinion most posts on this thread aren't actually going for that "Wun Yung Gai" strand of humour. So my reply above may seem a bit heavy-handed.

I was only inclined to post because I felt the defences being offered ("please, explain why this could possibly be racist, I don't see it!"/"if this is racist, then we should ban this too") were shortsighted or dishonest.
 
 
Papess
19:54 / 25.10.05
Kovacs, please explain how the Barbarian thread is any different to this. How is using the term web-fu any different to this thread? Just saying it's just different is not a reasonable argument.
 
 
Papess
19:56 / 25.10.05
Pardon me Kovacs, you said "irrelevant", not different.

Why is one irrelevant and not the other?
 
 
Harrison Ford, in a battle suit, wheels for feet, knives and guns
20:03 / 25.10.05
For fuck's sake...........goddam record player's fucked again...
 
 
skolld
20:04 / 25.10.05
how i long for the days when this thread was still funny..
 
  

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