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Not angry? ill soon sort that

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11:23 / 25.06.04

Ive always been aware of chicks cartoons before but this one takes the big bigot biscuit

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1052/1052_01.asp

(im at work so ill try and make it linky later)

11:51 / 25.06.04

Jack Chick is a man with serious issues.
The little girl in that freaked me out, like those hitler youth photo's with happy smiling kids wearing swastikas. Eugh.

12:07 / 25.06.04

OMG, you have to see this tract.

It's got the creepy little bigot girl Suzy and her comically drawn evil witch teacher pushing the ungodly doctrine of, (gasp) evolution on sweet little kiddies! The bitch!
Apparently evolutionary theory was created by the devil to keep little kids from going to heaven. He says this explicity. Ffffffffuck me.

12:15 / 25.06.04

Yes, I too am outraged.

Some of the line work was atrocious and his sense of proportion in a few of the panels was completely skewed.

The dialogue was a bit rough as well:

"If anyone tries to make YOU Gay, stay AWAY from them!"

As if kids talk like that nowadays.

Ex

12:39 / 25.06.04

But Suzy had such shiny hair! I trusted her!

On a related note, has anyone seen what Ron Hubbard says about 'perversion'? I happened to open Dianetics the night before last and it went straight to the pervert page (135). Or possibly there are perverts on every page (1-56,700ish).
Anyway, I guessed he had issues (and couldn't write for shit) but even I was mildly surprised. Apparently, a society that has a science that can cure perversion and fails to use it doesn't deserve to survive. Which I assume means that if I'm still pottering around in 20 years, Hubbard will be wrathful. It's nice to annoy people just by existing.

pointless and uncalled for

12:41 / 25.06.04

"If anyone tries to make YOU Gay, stay AWAY from them!"

Good grief, little did I realise that hordes of evil homo's were roaming the planet bent on forcing us into hot hir on hir lovin'. I guess all of mine must be harassing Chick. He's probably got a cuter ass than me.

Oh well, less interruptions while I try to perfect my bigot seeking missile.

Spyder Todd 2008

14:23 / 25.06.04

Oh well, less interruptions while I try to perfect my bigot seeking missile.

Can you make me one too, please?

14:26 / 25.06.04

Yeah, this guy is a total fuckwad. It is notable that he's got so many different translations going around of his stuff. Way to get out the GOOD word.

Despite loathing the content, I've always had a collection of his little booklets traveling around with me since I was little. Used to check the payphone outside of the local donut shop for them and have picked up quite a few since then. Was thinking I would use his format and branding for a subversive web project, but never really got down to it. Maybe some day...

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

15:30 / 25.06.04

To be honest, I LOVE that fact that Chick exists... in a purely "give 'em enough rope" sense, obviously.

HOWEVER (and it's a big fuckin' however)...

I would so love to go and firebomb these asshats' houses. (I'm guessing "Jack Chick" is no longer a lone cartoonist, but a house name for a buncha these fucking retards).

16:10 / 25.06.04

On the plus side, it is a gleefully easy style to parody, and easy to manufacture.
It is strange how these things can be guffaw inducingly stupid while provoking anger/depression. I would try to take heart in the impossibilty of anyone accepting this crap if I hadn't met that kid at camp...

Psi-L is working in hell

16:57 / 25.06.04

Ugh...thanks for that Puck...I do indeed have some serious anger management issues now.

takes deep breathes

The more you read the site the worse it gets...there's a whole page on how the Qu'ran can be disproven as it doesn't stand up to science and reason:

Either the sun sets in a pond or it doesn't. It is either one way or the other. There can be no middle ground, no compromise, no evading the issue.

It only takes one error to disprove the Qur'an. That's right. Just one little error and the whole book goes down in defeat!

And yet the bible is the TRUTH apparently, because we are told it is....yuk. It's all horrible...make it stop!

First person to find a possible error of reason or science in the bible wins a prize I say....

17:19 / 25.06.04

I'm sorry. I know there are times when Mr. Chick can be infuriating as hell.

But the 'Shoving Angel' alone is enough to make me crack up till I'm physically exhausted.

17:19 / 25.06.04

Ahhh, the freakish wondrousness of dicks bearing Chicks...

18:58 / 25.06.04

"God expects a man to marry a woman and have children. Any other way is forbidden by God. (Gen, 2:24; Lev 18:22; Rom 1:26-27)

Well, while we're on the subject...

If a married man dies without children, his brother shall marry the widow. If he refuses to marry his brother's widow or deliberately does not give her children, he shall either be slain or pay a fine of one shoe. (Gen 38:6-10; Deut 25:5-10)

Simon Hoggart

19:20 / 25.06.04

chick

Less searchable M0rd4nt

22:51 / 25.06.04

Ahhh, Chick. Dear old Jack Chick. I've been hating him so long it almost feels like affection, y'know? Incidentally, does anyone have a link to the HPL/Chick spoof, coz the one in my bookmarks seems to have gone the way of all links that mock Mr. Vindictively Litigious Insane Fundie.

02:51 / 26.06.04

I went to school with Jack Chick's nephew, who is a HUGE fan of troma films and professional wrestling. a delightful fellow, actually. apparently jack is quite the black sheep of the family.

03:26 / 26.06.04

Do you mean this one, Mordant?

04:58 / 26.06.04

Bitch looks like E.T..
Here's one of my favourites. Did you know not only are Freemasons going to burn in hell, they also resemble a neo-nazi newsletter's cartoon Jews and are sweaty, unkempt and unshaven, with combovers and pinprick pupils?
FEAR THE FEZ!
Chickian christians, on the other hand, are nicely dressed, immaculately groomed, with kindly smiles and dialated pupils that take up the whole iris. Kind of like the Xenomorph from "Something is Out There".
Fuck me, I haven't seen a comic with an agenda like this since I did work experience for Streetwize.

05:08 / 26.06.04

Deuteronomy 25:11
(King James)
11 When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets:
12 Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her.
(Revised)
11 If men get into a fight with one another, and the wife of one intervenes to rescue her husband from the grip of his opponent by reaching out and seizing his genitals, 12you shall cut off her hand; show no pity.

Makes you think, dunnit?

05:25 / 26.06.04

And if thine eye offends thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire.

Matthew 18:9

08:28 / 26.06.04

Take my virgin daughters... please!
And didn't he end up screwing them himself, anyway?
Ah, well, waste not, want not. And I think his wife had turned into a pillar of salt by that stage, so no joy there.
Lot- the bible's answer to Hal Jordan.

11:04 / 26.06.04

Thank you so fucking much. I'd never heard of Jack Chick before. And now I have. And it's yet another name to go on my list...

What a complete cunt.

14:28 / 26.06.04

Okay, confession time...

I don't rememeber exactly how I came across them...Oh that's right, I was buying some other Christian books, and I think you could get these tracts along with them cheap. I was interested by the idea of using tracts.

Being a Christian isn't easy, you know*. You have to save the whole world and no-one will listen to you. So you're often tempted to consider any possible means. I never actually used any of them, but I did read through. The pack came with tracts on just about every one under the sun, all coloured with pretty much the same perspective obviously.

Most of them were pretty forgettable and unimaginative. There was one that stuck in my mind and which I still feel quite disturbed by. It was based on that scripture which talks about how one should take the narrow path, and it had all these people walking along the plain, and one little path going round the mountain.

This guy knows he should take the narrow path, but then this other guy comes along and softens him up, telling him he doesn't need to bother with that, it'll all be okay. Then at the end, he finds out he's going to hell, and he says to the other guy "You were wrong" [to tell me not to take the narrow path]. In response, the guy who told him this pulls his face off (underneath he's a demon/the devil) and says "No - you were wrong! You didn't put your faith in Jesus Christ!"

There's something so disturbing about that...

Part of it is the fact that these tracts encourage people to think that anyone who expresses anti-Christian views is pretty much synonymous with the devil and acting purely under his influence. Whether there is any basis for this view in the Bible I wouldn't like to say, but it's certainly pretty ugly. This kind of view would make anyone paranoid, thinking everyone around is out to corrupt them.

Anyone come across these tracts themselves? What do people think about the idea of tracts in and of themselves? Would you leave materials for people to find if you believed in a certain cause or message? If not why not? (Excuse me trying to direct the thread, don't know if it's what the person who started it had in mind)

*I'm not a Christian now. That's for another discussion, preferably not anytime soon...

18:36 / 26.06.04

There's no doubting that Chick's odious tracts encourage a bipolar 'winner and sinners' approach to Christianity. Having spent a lot of time around Christian boards, 7 Beats, I'm rather intrigued by how people accrue and lose faith - so if you feel like starting a thread on your own experiences, I'd be interested to contribute...

00:29 / 27.06.04

I will in time Ganesh, when I've figured out something specific enough to focus on.

02:20 / 27.06.04

Heh. I used to find these things all over the place in my hometown. I still have a couple. I also have a fantastic spoof one based on Wicca that uses actual Bible verses - I'll see if I can find it anywhere online.

There's a Chick Tract spoof archive, apparently... haven't actually looked at it yet, but it might be entertaining...

flufeemunk effluvia

02:53 / 27.06.04

My little Brother found this one at school. It was a good laugh. I just love the narrow little lens all his "evidence" goes through.

08:48 / 28.06.04

that masonic one's brilliant:

Righteousness comes only from Jesus Christ NEVER from an apron.

Ex

09:09 / 28.06.04

What do people think about the idea of tracts in and of themselves? Would you leave materials for people to find if you believed in a certain cause or message? If not why not?

I'm very ambivalent; I understand that if you're a Christian it's a little selfish and hypocritical not to witness. Also, handing out tracts is one of the least intrusive kinds of interraction; I'd prefer being handed something than being phoned, or having someone knocking on my door. There's a chap who hangs round the shopping centre who asks where you're going when you die ("Plymouth?") and I'd far rather be given something by him that I can choose not to take, or to take and then not to read.

On the other hand, most of the things I have been handed by Christian evangelists have been wildly dodgy. Evangelising and witnessing seems to have been taken up by branches of the church I have very little sympathy with; with the enthsiasm for public witness comes very traditional views on the Family, women, gaysexing... Particularly annoying and unsettling were the pamphlets against fornication I was handed as a girl.

I would distribute material if I felt strongly about a subject. I would probably usually do it within a certain space - such as accompanying an official picket, or at a festival or conference - but that's more about relevance, interest and expected uptake.

09:50 / 28.06.04

Oh, I love JC (oh, look, blasphemous initials!)
I first came across him when a zine printed excerpts from the hilarious Dark Dungeons.
This was around the same time that the hilariously bad Mazes and Monsters (I hadn't realised Tom Hanks was in this. Did you know he's going to look exactly like Enoch Powell when he gets older. Serves him right.)
AFAIK, Jack Chick is still alive and doing the stuff himself.

11:19 / 28.06.04

The worst tract I was ever given was from some "wee free" nut job who used to hang around Byres Road. The bit that stuck in my mind was:
Q: I live a good life, I'm kind to people and I give to charity, will I go to heaven?
A: No, not unless you accept the LORD Jesus christ into your life etc etc
I felt like going back and giving the guy a smack. I don't want to go in to the thinking that creates that kind of thing I really don't. I mean this kind of thing is entertaining untill you realise that these people actually believe it.

16:16 / 28.06.04

Phyrephox - I'm not sure quite what's so offensive about that. It's a pretty basic Christian idea, salvation through faith not through works, and at least it's giving it to you straight, rather than trying to use your own hopes and fears against you the way the Chick tracts do.

06:33 / 29.06.04

I know, it's just an aspect of the christian (and other) faith that really annoys me. The whole concept of this loving god who says to his creations "my way or the high way". I mean this isn't really the thread to get into a big theological discussion (and I haven't done my homework on it) but I find the idea of a creator who would say this objectionable to say the least.

07:16 / 29.06.04

Oh? You find it "objectionable"? Well excuse me smarty pants but I don't exactly see you making people out of dirt and rib bones. Um, when exactly was the last time you waxed wroth by raining down fire and brimstone on the unbelievers? When was that? Oh, I remember. NEVER! That's when! I tell you what, maybe when you swim on the face of the empty void and create an entire UNIVERSE out of nothing, in six fucking days no less, maybe then you can have your say about what's "objectionable" behaviour for a supreme being. Until then then I think you should keep the creating business to the Creators and yer little ingrate comments to yourself.

Dick.

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